Lost Angel
Page 35
‘Erra…dwink for Erra too.’
‘Oh, my God,’ Val gasped.
Ellen could only stare, tears flooding her eyes. Was it possible? Was Pauline able to see Sarah?
‘Maybe it’s you,’ Val said. ‘Perhaps seeing you sparked something off in Pauline’s memory.’
Val’s explanation made sense, but Ellen shook her head. ‘No, I think there’s more to it than that. You…you see I went to see a woman and she told me my answers lay close to home. She was right, well, almost. They were close to home, but not mine – my mother’s.’
‘What answers?’
‘I wanted to know, needed to know, that there’s an afterlife.’
‘Ellen, I’m sure there is.’
Pauline scrambled to her feet now, toddling over to Ellen, and for a brief moment as just one of the child’s hands came to rest on her knee, Ellen felt that there were two. Her heart skipped a beat. Sarah was here, close to her, she could feel it in her soul and tears ran unchecked down her cheeks.
‘No cry,’ Pauline appealed, holding her arms up.
Ellen lifted her onto her lap, kissing the top of her head. She had rejected this child, dreaded seeing her, but now, thanks to Pauline’s innocent eyes, she knew that Sarah lived on.
‘Yes, Val, there is an afterlife and now I’m sure too.’
‘Erra go now,’ Pauline said.
No, no, Ellen thought, but then somewhere deep inside she knew that it was time – that, like her, it was time for her beautiful, beloved daughter to move forward. Softly she said, ‘Yes, fly, darling. Fly free until one day, we’ll be together again.’
There was a gasp, a choking sound and Ellen looked over Pauline’s head to see Val running towards the window. No, no, it had to be a coincidence, it had to be, Ellen thought as she watched a beautiful butterfly landing on the sill.
Val flung the window open, and spreading its wings again, the butterfly seemed to hesitate for a moment; but then it lifted in flight, soaring outside.
‘Did…did you see that?’ Val asked, eyes wide with wonder. ‘You…you don’t think…?’
Ellen smiled softly and with Pauline in her arms she went over to the window.
‘I don’t know, Val. Perhaps it was just a coincidence, but it’s one that will live with me for the rest of my life.’
‘Yes, me too,’ Val said, and, as Pauline reached out her arms, Val took her.
Ellen looked out of the window, hoping for a last glimpse of the butterfly. It was there, on a buddleia, wings twitching. A profound feeling of peace filled her, and at that moment she remembered the old woman and the rune stones. This was the sign she had spoken of, Ellen was sure of it, and though some people might think she was living in a world of fantasy, others that she was mad, Ellen didn’t care.
What did it matter what other people thought? What she chose to believe, what eased her pain, what gave her comfort and the strength to go on
- that was all that mattered. And how could anyone begrudge her that?
The butterfly’s wings opened and then it was flying again, soaring away. Fantasy or not, coincidence or not, before it went out of sight for ever, Ellen whispered, ‘Goodbye, darling. For now
- goodbye.’
Acknowledgements
My thanks as always to my wonderful husband, Jim and daughter, Samantha, along with my agent, Judith Murdoch, and the wonderful team at Avon/HarperCollins.
About the Author
LOST ANGEL
Kitty Neale was raised in South London and this working class area became the inspiration for her novels. In the 1980s she moved to Surrey with her husband and two children, but in 1998 there was a catalyst in her life when her son died, aged just 27. After joining other bereaved parents in a support group, Kitty was inspired to take up writing and her books have been Sunday Times bestsellers.
Kitty now lives in Spain with her husband and is working on her new novel for Avon, due to be published in summer 2010.
To find out more about Kitty go to www.kittyneale.co.uk
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By the Same Author:
Nobody’s Girl
Sins of the Father
Family Betrayal
Desperate Measures
Lost and Found
Copyright
This novel is entirely a work of fiction. The names, characters and incidents portrayed in it are the work of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or localities is entirely coincidental.
AVON
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FIRST EDITION
First published in Great Britain by HarperCollinsPublishers 2009
Copyright © Kitty Neale 2009
Kitty Neale asserts the moral right to be identified as the author of this work
A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library
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EPub Edition © JANUARY 2010 ISBN: 978-0-007-34633-2
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