Fail to Trust (The Casteel Trust Series Book 2)
Page 13
I sit straight up in my rolling chair, and it tips forward.
“Franklin, I never invited Clay here. I had no idea he was going to show, and I can’t tell him not to do it again, or he’ll think something’s going on between Travis and me.”
“Well, can you at least do your best to deter it? Travis was a mess last night and still is this morning. If this drives him back to drinking, I’m gonna be pissed. He’s fighting to get well, Becca, and he’s doing it more for you than for himself,” he says with frustration.
My chest constricts, and if I didn’t feel like shit last night, I sure do now. My lip quivers as my pained emotions scratch at the surface.
Franklin grabs his hips and looks up to the ceiling before staring hard at me.
“I’m sorry. I’m not trying to be a dick, but Travis is not only my uncle; he’s my best friend. I can’t stand by doing nothing and watch him spiral back out of control.
“I honestly don’t get why you’d take a job here if you’re certain there will never be a future for you and Travis. It was kinda cold, and I’d appreciate it if you made it clear to him that you’re moving on.”
Swallowing, I look away. The heavy tears formed from his honesty are rimming my eyelids. It’s their job to spill my pain, to give me some alleviation, but I don’t deserve to feel relief. I’m pond scum.
He leaves without another word, and I grab a tissue. I use it to cover my mouth, to muffle my cry, but I guess it didn’t work since Reese is stepping through my doorway.
I shake my head at her, needing her to leave this alone. It’s all my doing, so I deserve to wallow in more pain. Travis claims he’s not fragile glass, but it’s not true.
Franklin is a sweetheart. He’d never speak to me like he did if he wasn’t speaking from his heart. He knows Travis better than anyone.
“I saw Franklin pass by my door. What did he say to you?” Reese is in blue jeans today and a bright green sweater that show off her pretty matching eyes. They’re unlike mine that are now red and puffy.
“He didn’t say anything my gut wasn’t already telling me.” I sniffle and grab another tissue to wipe my eyes. “I have some projects I’m designing. Can you tell Everett I’m going to work on them from home today? I can’t be here with Travis.”
“I was afraid of this happening, but I want you here, Becca. This job could be wonderful for you, and you deserve it. I think it will get easier for the two of you to work together, so just give it time.”
“I didn’t mean for Clay to show up here, Reese. I’d never do that to Travis. Please tell his brothers. I don’t want them pissed at me.”
“They could never be angry at you. You saved Travis’s life on the side of a road.”
“Yeah, well, it appears Franklin has already forgotten.”
“Go home and rest today. Things will calm down. You’ll see.”
I hate this. I’m not exactly showing her the maturity I’d planned to by taking this job. It hits me that I have to tell Travis I can’t go to lunch with him.
My heart stings again, and I’m fighting to breathe, and it’s all because there will be no calm to this storm. If anything, it’s only going to grow stronger. Travis will make sure of it.
Chapter Twenty
Travis
I’m stocking shelves at the back of the store. Even though I’m on the side of the room that’s farthest from the doors, I spot Becca treading toward them. She’s moving with purpose as her laptop bag and purse hang over her shoulder.
I have this feeling she’s leaving and not coming back today, so I hurry toward the door. She’s unlocking her car when I reach her.
“Hey, where are you headed off to?”
“Home.” She doesn’t look back at me as she swings open her door, so I gently grab her arm.
“What’s wrong?”
“I’m sorry. I can’t have lunch with you. I’m not feeling well.”
“Then let me drive you home.”
Sitting down in her seat, she shakes her head and mutters, “I knew it.” Her sweet face is red and swollen, and it’s obvious she’s hurting.
“You knew what?”
“I knew you’d never let me walk away.” She tries to shut her door, but I don’t let her. My hand is curled over the top of the window as I step around it and duck my head.
“I’m glad you’re wising up. No, I’m not going to let you drive off without giving me some sort of explanation. You not feeling well is an excuse not to go to lunch with me, but what I’m wondering most is why you’re hurrying out of here after you’ve been crying.”
“I don’t think we can be friends, Travis. It will never work, and I don’t want to hurt you. I’ll stay out of your way, and you can stay out of mine.”
“Did Clay cause this? Was he pissed we’re working together?”
She glares up at me. “No, he didn’t cause this. He’s thoughtful and understanding. Unlike you, he doesn’t fly off the handle when he doesn’t get his way.”
“I’m not like that anymore.”
“Then why did you look on the verge of pounding his head in yesterday when I left with him?” I grab her face and turn it toward me. I’m cradling her cheeks as she looks up at me with her big, round eyes.
“Because I love you, Becca. I told you I won’t give up on us, so yeah, it angered me to see you with him. I’m changing for the better, and I thought we were going to lunch where I could share with you how much so.”
“I believe you’re doing better, but I can’t get closer to you. You’ll only get hurt if I stay with Clay, and right now he’s who I want. I have to go.”
Becca
Travis pulls my mouth to his and smothers it with a kiss. I clamp my fingers around his wrists to push him away, but instead of doing what I should, my lips separate, allowing his tongue right inside.
He groans and shoves his hands through my hair. He holds it snug and tugs it, the sting like kindling to the flame of insurmountable desire. He deepens our kiss, and lord, how I’ve always loved his kisses.
My body craves more … so much more than I can let him give. Feeling desperate not to lose this moment of lust between us, I envision him pulling me from the seat of my car.
Jumping up, I’d circle my legs around his hips and grind against his hard dick right here in this parking lot. I moan against his mouth, and he pulls free.
“Fuck, Becca, let me in this car, and we’ll drive to my place. Come back to me, beautiful. You’re so close to giving in.”
I cover my gaping mouth, surprised over his words and the fantasy I had of him.
“What am I doing? This shouldn’t have happened. Minutes ago I was trying to make it clear I can’t be your friend, and now look at us!”
I shove his chest forcefully, and he stumbles back. I jerk my door shut and start my car. I don’t have to look next to me to see his shocked expression. I can envision it as I listen to him pound on my window and shout at me to open my door.
I’m shaking as he moves to the front and slams his fists down on the hood of my car next. I clutch the steering wheel, unsure of what to do.
Let him in …
Let him in …
Let him in.
You love him …
You love him …
You love him.
I shelter my ears and beg for the screaming voice in my head to stop. Franklin comes barreling toward us, and he grabs Travis from behind, dragging him away from my car.
Trav is pointing at me and shouts, “I’ll never give up until you’re mine!”
For almost two months, there’s been this desperation inside of him I somehow ignite, and when revealed, it’s alarming yet tempting to me at the same time.
Maybe it’s a love more powerful than any I’ll ever experience again, or maybe it’s only raw emotion from all we’ve lost … all we can’t replace.
Stop doing this to him.
The voice in my head pulls me back from the temptation to give in. I roll down my window and star
e straight at him. He freezes, and Franklin comes to a stop, his arms still crossed around Travis’s chest.
Lie, Becca.
Lie.
“I’m sorry. I don’t love you anymore. Now let me go.”
“That’s a fucking lie!” he shouts.
I throw my vehicle into drive and speed off, making a promise that I won’t give in again.
Travis
“Get off of me,” I spout to Franklin. He releases me and rubs his forehead.
“Let’s talk in my truck.” He’s pointing at it, and I can’t decide what I should do with the anger and desperation scratching at me from the inside out. I stomp toward it and sling open the door.
He gets inside and looks over at me.
“Man, that was bad, and it was all my fault.” He hangs his head. “I said something to her.”
“What the fuck did you say?” My fists are knotted, and I have a feeling I’m gonna want to use them in a minute.
“I warned her to keep Clay away from here and not to string you along.”
“Fuck, Link! It’s not your place to say anything to her. You probably made her feel like shit!”
“Yeah, and that asshole showing up here made you feel like shit. I didn’t want to see it happen again. Man, she told you she doesn’t love you. You have to leave her alone.”
“She was lying. She’s scared she’ll get with me and I’ll screw it up.”
My fist connects with the top of the dash. “If she hadn’t seen me drunk or found Mindy in my hospital room, we’d be together by now. My mistakes are going to haunt me forever.”
“You’ve only been home from rehab a few days. You have to calm down and gain some patience while you’re working on your own shit.”
“But what if she falls in love with him before I can show her I’m better?”
“It could happen, but I can promise you it’ll be the outcome if you’re losing your cool in front of her like you did back there.”
Everything he’s saying is true, and I’ve got to accept it. I have to leave her alone and pray I don’t lose her altogether before I can show her I’m stable.
Chapter Twenty-One
One Month Later
Becca
“My mom and siblings are excited to meet you,” Clay says to me on the phone. I shut my laptop and lean back in my office chair.
“I’m nervous.”
“Don’t be. They’re going to love you. It will be a welcome distraction, too, since it’s our first Thanksgiving without my father.”
This tugs on my heartstrings. How could I possibly back out now?
“OK, but I have to be at my family’s dinner at five.”
“That’s no problem since we’ll be eating at one. I have something I want to discuss with you tomorrow, too.”
“Sounds good.”
“I’ll pick you up at twelve-thirty then. I have to hop off here. I have a meeting with a client, but I can’t wait to see you.”
“Same here.”
I end the call and ponder over what he’s planning to discuss with me. I need a drink of water after that conversation, so I stroll to the break room, praying Travis isn’t present.
Ever since the blowup at my car, he has avoided me, and although it’s what needed to happen, I feel awful about it.
I wanted us to be friends, and every time Reese mentions how well he’s doing, or when I see him grinning to someone at the front counter, a tiny part of me wishes we could have more.
After grabbing a bottled water from the fridge in the break room, an older man enters.
“Hi,” I say. “Are you new here?”
“Yes, ma’am. I started Monday. My name is Clive.” He sticks his hand out but yanks it away and wipes it down his leg. “Sorry, I better not get grease on your pretty hand.”
“I’m Becca Abbott, and it’s nice to meet you.”
His eyes widen. “You’re Becca, huh?” Scanning me, he grins. “That boy didn’t lie. You’re one beautiful young lady.”
My face warms. “What boy?”
“Travis Casteel. We were in rehab together, and he sure boasted about you.” He scratches his head. “Ah, hell. He probably wouldn’t appreciate me telling you that, but it’s the truth. He was kind enough to get me a job here, and I sure do appreciate it.”
“The Casteels take care of their family and friends.”
“Yes they do, and it’s why I’m telling you what you mean to him.” Clive frowns.
“I’m sorry things haven’t worked out for the two of you. I know how bad he wanted it to, but at least the hope for that got him through rehab. He worked damn hard in there and has ever since in your honor. You must be pretty special.”
I swallow the lump in my throat before I open my water and take a quick drink.
“I’m unable to be there for him, so thank you for being his friend. I better get back to work, but it was great to meet you, and welcome to Casteel.” Before he can reply, I’m fleeing the room.
As soon as I reach my office door, I hear my name being called. I turn and find Clive standing there.
“Ms. Abbott, I wondered if I could ask a favor of you.”
“Sure, and please call me Becca.” He follows me in, and I step around my desk.
“I’m volunteering to serve food to the less fortunate tomorrow, and we’re in need of some desserts. I know it’s Thanksgiving and all, but would you want to donate something?”
“Um, I can do that, but I’d have to drop it off before noon.”
“That’s perfect since we begin serving at eleven.”
I tear off a piece of paper from a small notepad and hand it to him with a pen.
“Write the address down for me.”
He scribbles on the paper and hands it back.
I glance at it. “I make pretty good brownies. I’ll drop them off around eleven.”
He gives me a broad satisfied grin, and I’m witnessing the same charisma Travis possesses. I see why they’re friends.
“You have no idea how much I appreciate this. Thank you, Becca.”
***
It’s 11:00 a.m. when I pull into the parking lot at the address Clive gave me. I recognize the place. It’s a food pantry I’ve passed by a few times but hardly paid attention to.
This part of Marietta is a bit sketchy, so I pull my purse over my shoulder and start toward the door with a tray of brownies.
Near the road is a sign with yellow lit bulbs racing across the top of it. It’s advertising the free Thanksgiving feast they’re offering from eleven to two today.
Upon opening the door, the loud chatter floods my ears. There is already a lengthy line of people waiting to be served a meal.
I stay frozen near the entrance as my eyes scan the room. The sun is shining in through the many windows facing the street.
Feeling overdressed and out of place, I pull the tray of brownies closer to me and take a glimpse at my attire. I’m in a burgundy silk blouse and black dress pants, and my grey patent leather pumps shine with the white floor beneath them.
Looking for Clive, I reach up and play with the silver chain around my neck. I finally spot him behind the long counter where they’re serving the meal.
He’s dishing what looks like green beans onto a plate. He’s smiling at the guest, and I’m watching when a door behind him swings open and out walks Travis. Wearing mitten pot holders, he carries a long pan over to the serving station and sets it down.
I step back closer to the door and bump into someone’s chest.
“Oh, sorry,” I say as I spin around. Franklin is staring down at me, and it’s the closest we’ve been since he was in my office a month ago, lecturing me about Travis.
“What are you doing here?” he asks.
“Clive asked if I’d like to donate a dessert for the dinner today, so I’m here to drop it off.”
“I can take it for you.”
I nod. “Right … You don’t want me near Travis.”
He sighs and sc
ratches his head. Someone tries to enter through the door behind him, so we both step off to the side.
“I only offered because you looked like you were about to run out of the place. Becca, I’m sorry about what I said in your office. I could’ve been kinder about it. I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings.”
“No, you were right, and it’s why I’ve stayed away from Travis.”
“He’s doing great. You should say hi to him. I mean, we’re all going to be at dinner together tonight, right?” Franklin smiles, and his grey eyes sparkle.
“Yes. Reese invited my mom, dad and me to dinner at their place. Listen, I’m on a tight schedule today. Could you please give these to Clive and tell him I was here?” I shove the disposable tray into his hands.
“Sure.” He seems discouraged, and I don’t know what he wants from me. He was telling me a month ago to stay away from Travis, and now he wants me to say hi to him.
The thought is tempting, and it’s why I have to get out of here. Clay doesn’t deserve for me to be thinking about Travis. It’s bad enough he doesn’t know I’ll be seeing him later today.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Becca
My hand is snug inside Clay’s. He’s driving me to his parents’ home for dinner. Well, I guess it’s his mother’s home now.
I thought I was nervous on our first date, but that didn’t hold a candle to how rattled I am at the moment. I’m rethinking this whole “meet the family” event. Clay and I haven’t even declared that we’re exclusive.
He has implied it in various ways: having me sleep over at his condo frequently, talking about us being together in the future, and now meeting his family.
However, we’ve never declared we’re in a relationship, and as he takes me to meet those who are most important in his life, my gut is sending a message to my brain that going to his mother’s home is premature.
If I’m honest with myself, it’s because something warm stirred in me today when I saw Travis smiling and serving food to the less fortunate. I’m also dwelling on seeing him later this evening.