A Game 0f Chess With The Marquess (Historical Regency Romance)
Page 20
“Of course, you know what that means,” the Duchess said.
“What…what means?” Adrian found he was having trouble keeping up with the conversation.
“Why, His Grace’s imminent return.” The Duchess smiled. Was it Adrian’s imagination, or was there something cold in her eyes? “We must ensure that the marriage contracts are prepared and ready to be signed when he arrives.”
“Oh—” Adrian swallowed. “You don’t think—oughtn’t we wait for him to join us? He will want to be involved in the drawing up of the contracts, don’t you agree?”
“Nonsense!” Lady Katherine laughed. “Father trusts us, Lord Galdhor. Besides—” she leaned across the table with a smile that was almost predatory, “you and I know what we want.”
“So,” the Duchess said. “First things first, Lord Galdhor. I know you will be taking Lady Katherine back to your own manor after the wedding, but I must insist that we hold the ceremony and ball here at Brackhill Manor. After all, ours is the finer manor. I’m sure your family will agree.”
“Fine,” Adrian murmured, picking up a grape again and rolling it between his fingers. Just now, he felt the best thing might be to agree to whatever they asked.
The Duke would be home soon.
And that accelerated his timeline—he had to find Lenora, and quickly—but perhaps it was also something to look forward to. Perhaps the Duke would be easier to talk to, more understanding, more logical, than the two women.
It wasn’t as if he would want his daughter to marry someone who didn’t want her, would he?
Once Adrian made it clear that he held no feelings for Lady Katherine, things would resolve themselves very quickly. He felt sure of that.
“Now tell us, Lord Galdhor,” the Duchess continued “who will we expect to attend the festivities from your own family? Your Lady Mother, of course.”
“Naturally,” Adrian agreed.
“But it will be a highly-anticipated affair,” the Duchess went on. “Why, I’m sure members of the ton will be coming to Brackhill Manor from great distances to attend. Have you any family nearby?”
“An uncle, I believe,” Adrian said. “My own family is rather small, Your Grace.”
“Well, perhaps it won’t be for much longer,” the Duchess said, giving her daughter a showy little wink. Lady Katherine flushed scarlet and looked down at her lap, but she was smiling.
Another mother hoping for children, then. That was the last thing Adrian needed right now. I am not going to wed Lady Katherine! he longed to shout. He knew he couldn’t allow himself an outburst—it would be highly improper—but he felt bottled up with frustration. How could he possibly get through this?
Lenora.
He simply had to find her. He had to talk to her. He would devote the entire day to it. She had to be around here somewhere, and once he had found her he knew he would feel better about things.
“Now, the wedding ball will be the largest and most extravagant we’ve ever hosted at Brackhill Manor,” the Duchess was saying. “We’re going to need every servant we have. And I’m not sure our own household staff are enough to get the job done.”
“Will we hire more, then, Mother?” Lady Katherine asked.
“Of course not,” the Duchess said, laughing lightly. “Galdhor Manor is full of servants who can help. Isn’t that right, Lord Galdhor?”
“Yes, Your Grace.”
“That’s settled then. You’ll sent your servants to us—shall we say a week before the wedding date so that they can help with the preparations?”
Adrian was slightly stunned at her entitlement. “My mother is in poor health, Your Grace. She will need her servants around her.”
“Oh, surely she can make do with only one or two,” the Duchess said, waving a hand at Adrian.
Adrian felt shocked, but there was no point in arguing. This would never come to pass, after all. “Of course, Your Grace.”
“Do you think Father will hire a new chambermaid?” Lady Katherine asked, reaching for a piece of bread.
That caught Adrian’s attention. “A new chambermaid? Why?” Lenora hadn’t lost her position, surely?
“Oh, hadn’t you heard?” Lady Katherine giggled. “It’s grotesque, actually. One of our chambermaids was having an affair with the stable boy! She snuck down there last night for one of her trysts, and I guess she couldn’t see where she was going in the dark, because she agitated one of the horses.”
Adrian’s stomach dropped. “What?”
“She was kicked in the head,” Lady Katherine said. “Can you believe it? I suppose she had it coming, the trollop, but it leaves me short a maid!”
“Who was kicked?” Adrian asked. “Which maid?”
“Does it matter?” Lady Katherine asked, her eyes narrowing slightly. “One maid is the same as another. The point is that I’ve been left one short.”
“Well, it’s just that I’ve gotten to know them all a bit during my time here,” Adrian stammered, fumbling for an explanation. “No, I suppose it doesn’t matter much, but…but I’m interested nonetheless.”
Interested didn’t begin to describe it. His heart was hammering in his chest, going a mile a minute. Please don’t let it have been her, he thought. Anyone but her. It was an awful thing to think, to wish misfortune on somebody else, but if it had been her…well, he didn’t think he could stand it.
“The fortunate thing is that she was the worst of our household staff,” Lady Katherine said airily. “I’m sure you hardly knew her, Lord Galdhor, as she spent more time gallivanting with her lover than attending to her chores.”
“But who was she?”
“Lenora was her name.”
Adrian felt as though he had been kicked by a horse. The grape in his hands smashed to a pulp between his fingers, squirting juice out onto his plate. Lenora, dead.
It couldn’t be. He had just spoken to her the day before.
But what else could explain her sudden absence from the house? And why on earth would Lady Katherine tell such a story if it wasn’t true? It was true. It had to be.
“Foolish girl,” the Duchess said. “She thought she was equipped to feed the horses. She had no idea that it takes training and skill to handle oneself around such large animals. Why, that’s why we keep a stable hand in the first place!”
“She thought the stable hand was just there for her personal pleasure,” Lady Katherine scoffed.
Adrian felt dizzy. Had Lenora really been having an affair with Jimmy the stable hand? He had felt as though he’d seen a spark between the two of them yesterday.
And now she’s dead. Gone for good.
By the sound of things, she wouldn’t have wanted him anyway. But that didn’t mean he didn’t care that she was dead. Of all the people he’d met at Brackhill Manor, Lenora had been his favorite. She had been the most like him, quiet and thoughtful and curious about the world.
Without her here, this place seemed barren and haunted.
Suddenly he found he couldn’t get away quickly enough.
What was the point of staying here even a moment longer if Lenora was gone? Why should he torment himself by remaining in the presence of the Duchess and Lady Katherine when home awaited?
He could go. He was no prisoner of theirs. He could get to his feet right now, walk out the front door with no explanation, and summon a carriage to take him back to Galdhor Manor.
And I am the Lord of Galdhor, he reminded himself. Mother won’t like seeing me back, but I owe her no explanation. I can simply go home and forget I ever set foot in Brackhill Manor.
Of course, he could do no such thing. He would never be able to forget Lenora.
“Are you quite sure you’re well, Lord Galdhor?” the Duchess asked. “You’re very pale all of a sudden.”
“Mother, leave him be,” Lady Katherine said. “Perhaps he just hasn’t had enough breakfast.” She smiled at Adrian. “I’ll send to the kitchens for a rasher of bacon, shall I? It will do you good.”
“No, really, I couldn’t possibly.” If Adrian tried to eat, he was probably going to be sick. The very idea of food while Lenora lay under the earth somewhere, rotting, was almost more than he could stand.
He honestly felt as though he might cry. And that definitely wouldn’t do. He couldn’t allow the two ladies to see how upset he was.
But they were looking at him with a curiosity that bordered on obscene. “He does look unwell,” the Duchess insisted. “Perhaps you ought to return to bed after we’ve finished with our breakfast, Lord Galdhor. After all, His Grace will be returning to the manor in a few hours, and you want to be fit to meet with him, don’t you?”
“Yes, of course, Your Grace.” Although not for the reasons she was no doubt expecting. Adrian was sure the Duchess was expecting him to want to talk to the Duke about the marriage contract. In reality, the only conversation Adrian wanted to have was one about transportation home.
Suddenly, he found, he wanted to depart Brackhill Manor as soon as he possibly could.
He hated it here. He hated the overbearing decor, so obviously designed to flaunt itself in the faces of any visitors. He hated the way servants hovered around the corners of rooms as if they were part of the furniture of the place, afraid even to speak. He hated the way Lady Katherine and the Duchess seemed to occupy entire rooms all by themselves.
His future stretched before him, long and bleak. He felt sure that not every Lady he courted would be as vapid and dull as Lady Katherine had been. Some of them were bound to be lively conversationalists. Some of them would surely share interests of his.
But none of the would ever capture his imagination—capture his very heart—the way Lenora had.
And Lenora was gone forever.
So what was the point in trying anymore? Why should he bother with the whole process of looking for a suitable Lady to return to Galdhor Manor with him? He might as well bring Lady Katherine, for all the difference it made now.
The thought settled like a weight in the pit of his stomach.
It truly doesn’t matter anymore, he realized. I thought I didn’t care about marrying, but the truth was that I did. I had hopes. And now the woman I loved is gone.
The best he could hope for was to keep the agonizing process of finding a suitable wife as short as possible.
And the way to keep that process as short as possible was perfectly clear.
Oh, God. I’m going to have to wed Lady Katherine after all.
It was the last thing he had ever wanted. But now all he wanted was for this nightmare process to be over. The idea of going back home only to leave again and spend time in someone else’s manor, getting to know some other noble lady and her parents, was more than he could face.
So I’ll bring her back with me. I don’t care. I won’t have a wife I can be close to, a wife I can enjoy myself with. I don’t have that now. And I’ll never find anybody I care for the way I did for Lenora.
And Lady Katherine was fair. There was that. Their children would be lovely. She had social graces, and he would be able to bring her to parties. God knew his mother would be happy with her.
Adrian wouldn’t be happy. But Adrian wouldn’t be happy no matter what he did.
Suddenly, everything had changed. Everything he had been so certain of had been altered with just a few words. The knowledge of Lenora’s death meant that none of Adrian’s plans could reach fruition. He would never learn whether she could have loved him too.
Of course, she couldn’t. Not if she was already having an affair with that stable hand.
Jimmy.
It was so hard for Adrian to even think about Jimmy right now.
Because, after all, wasn’t Jimmy’s loss even greater than Adrian’s own? What right have I to grieve? She did not belong to me, not in any sense. She was not my lover. She was hardly even my friend. She was just a woman I met, a woman I spoke to on the few occasions I managed to steal with her.
She was the woman I loved. But what difference does that make? She never even knew it.
But Jimmy, on the other hand…not only had he loved her, but she had loved him in return. He had lost someone who was his. This grief, this pain that Adrian was feeling—it was Jimmy’s by rights.
I will leave here and embark upon a new life with Lady Katherine, Adrian thought. But Jimmy will be left with nothing.
And yet, even now, he felt consumed by jealousy. By a longing to trade places with the stable hand. Even now, he thought he would rather have Jimmy’s life than his own.
Because, yes, Jimmy would be left without his love.
But so would Adrian.
And Jimmy would have the consolation of having at least had her at one time. Jimmy could always cling to the remembrance of the fact that she had loved him too.
And he would not be forced to spend the rest of his life engaged in a painful farce. He would not be compelled to pretend that he cared for a Lady who he could not stand. He would be permitted to shovel the hay and to groom the horses in peace.
Yes, Adrian would have traded places with him in a heartbeat.
The ladies had turned their attention away from Adrian altogether and had returned to discussing the upcoming wedding. I suppose they aren’t really that concerned for my well-being, Adrian thought, feeling somewhat bitter about it even though he didn’t want their attention on him.
The talk had turned to gowns, a topic Adrian felt he could have gone the rest of his days without hearing discussed anymore. Even when the only place they were going was supper, Lady Katherine could talk for hours about her gown.
“I want to wear blue,” she said now. “Pale blue. Robin’s egg.”
“Katherine,” her mother moaned, “on your wedding day? Surely not. You must see that white is the proper color.”
“But blue so perfectly sets off my eyes,” Katherine insisted. “Would you not say so, Lord Galdhor?”
She did have blue eyes. He supposed that was probably what she was referring to. “Blue would be lovely on you,” he said absently.
“How quickly you two have become a pair, conspiring against me!” the Duchess complained, but there was a twinkle in her eye and Adrian could tell she was pleased that he had sided with Lady Katherine. “And what will our guests think, may I ask?”
“Let them think whatever they will,” Lady Katherine said dismissively. “It’s my wedding, isn’t it? And not theirs?”
“Don’t you worry that rumors will be started about you?” the Duchess said.
“About my purity, you mean?” Lady Katherine scoffed. “Surely nobody is foolish enough to insult Lord Galdhor in such a manner. He is clever and handsome and deserves only the very best in a wife.” She looked at Lord Galdhor. “You aren’t concerned about this, are you?”
“No,” he said. He couldn’t have brought himself to care what she wore. She could attend the wedding in a riding dress, for all the difference it made to him, or in her nightgown. He just wanted it over and done with quickly.
But Lady Katherine cocked her head at him, her eyes narrowing slightly, and Adrian wondered whether he was showing too little interest in their arrangement.
“That is to say,” he went on quickly, “I only want you to be happy. Whatever you wish to wear is just fine, as long as it makes you happy.”
Her face relaxed.
The Duchess laughed. “Now, Katherine,” she said. “You mustn’t expect Lord Galdhor to become too invested in wedding planning. Men care very little for these things, you know.”
“Men enjoy balls,” Lady Katherine insisted. “Father does.”
“Yes, he does,” the Duchess agreed. “And perhaps we can find something for Lord Galdhor to invest himself in. The menu, maybe?”
Both Ladies turned expectant gazes on Adrian.
He stumbled, at a loss. “The menu?”
“But of course,” the Duchess said. “Even men have to eat. And we must have the finest supper at your wedding ball. Five courses, I should think! Now, come, tell us w
hat your most preferred dishes are so that we may plan for them. There will have to be a fish course, naturally.”
“With caviar?” Lady Katherine asked, her eyes as bright as if she had been promised diamonds.
The Duchess laughed. “You only marry once. Yes, caviar, three different kinds, I think, and toast for it. What fish is your favorite, Lord Galdhor?”
He couldn’t even seem to think of any fish. His mind was scrambled, his thoughts still with the terrible news of what had happened to Lenora. “Whatever Lady Katherine prefers,” he said. “I have no preference.”