Just a Little Kiss

by Renita Pizzitola

  I stabbed at my phone as I typed a response.

  Me: Well, I’m pretty sure I’ll still be annoyed with you in 10 minutes.

  Mason: At least you’ll be thinking about me.

  Mason: But in 10 hours you’ll be getting over it. And in 10 days you’ll know I was right. And 10 days from there…who knows?

  Me: You’re a little overly optimistic with your timeline.

  Mason: I AM the math genius.

  Me: You’re insanely frustrating.

  Mason: And always right.

  Me: Or a giant dick.

  Mason: Shouldn’t we save sexting for date 5 or 6?

  Me: Gah!

  Mason: OK, we can do it now. Geez. Calm down.

  Me: Good night, Mason.

  Mason: Way to get me all worked up then leave me high and dry.

  Me: Well, here’s a parting thought. I’m definitely filled with the desire to do something physical to you.

  Mason: That works.

  Me: Strangle you, Mason. I want to strangle you.

  Mason: Kinky.

  Mason: One more question. Think we should establish a safe word?

  Me: OMG. I’m going to hurt you.

  Mason: Not if we have a safe word. See? I’m thinking ahead.

  Mason: How about rutabaga? I’ve heard that’s a good one. You like that?

  Me: Whatever ends this conversation.

  Mason: Rutabaga it is.

  I tossed my phone back onto the shelf and punched my pillow several times to get comfortable. After a few hours of tossing and turning, I headed outside, hoping the ocean would calm my mind.

  The view was extraordinary with a full moon illuminating the night sky. The itch to capture such a perfect moment overtook me. I grabbed my camera from the cabin and tried to find the perfect angle.

  With my elbows resting on the stern, I snapped several shots, and though the water wasn’t rough, the slight bobble still affected my picture. Determined to get at least one good photo, I climbed over the railing and stood on the dock. I took a dozen more pictures before I felt like I might be satisfied with one.

  “I wish you could see this from my point of view.” Mason’s voice startled me. He leaned up against the cabin of his boat.

  “You scared the crap out of me. How long have you been there?”

  “A few minutes. You just looked…I don’t know, focused. I didn’t want to disturb it.”

  Obviously, too focused. “What in the world are you doing up?” I hung my camera around my neck and climbed back into my boat.

  “I’m always up this early. The crew will be here in half an hour. What are you doing up?”

  “Shit. Is it seriously that late?”

  “It’s seriously that early. Four-thirty in the morning, to be exact.” He pushed off the wall he’d leaned against and walked to the railing that faced my boat. “Do you ever sleep?”

  “Not well.” And even I wasn’t sure why that was. It started shortly after things ended with Brody. I’d wake up feeling all this pressure on my chest, like I couldn’t breathe. Then my whole body would get hot and the longer I lay still, the more unbearable the weight would become. So I’d get up and walk around, waiting for the feeling to subside. But now it was as though my body was programmed with some weird internal alarm, telling me to get up at all hours of the night.

  Mason studied me then asked, “Something keeping you up?” He grinned and it frustrated the hell out of me.

  “I had this really annoying conversation with someone earlier. Seems he thinks he knows me better than I know myself.”

  He feigned indignation. “What a self-righteous asshole.”

  I scoffed. “I’d say.”

  “Well, since I’m a kind, caring person who only wants what’s best for you, can I give you some advice?”

  “No.”

  He didn’t flinch at my response and kept talking. “Fuck what he said. Get some sleep. He might be an arrogant jerk, but he definitely didn’t mean to upset you.”

  “There’s no truth to what he said.” I refused to admit that he might have been on-point. If I allowed him to tear down all my defenses, what would be left to ensure this fling didn’t leave me wrecked come end of summer? Unless it lasted beyond…No, I couldn’t think like that. Nothing good would come of it.

  He rocked on his heels. “Okay.”

  There was that word again. Dammit. “There isn’t.”

  He nodded, clearly not buying it, which only agitated me more.

  “You are hands down the most frustrating human I know.”

  “I didn’t say a word.”

  I threw my hands up and grumbled, “Exactly.” Then stormed toward my cabin.

  “Is this our first fight?”

  I flipped him off over my shoulder.

  “Looking forward to the make-up sex,” he called after me.

  Part of me wanted to bite his head off, but another part of me wanted to laugh. Which was what he wanted. On both accounts. Obviously he enjoyed getting under my skin, but he also seemed to know we shared the same humor. But I refused to give in to either weakness and instead continued inside, turned off all the lights and threw myself on my bed.

  Of course, I didn’t sleep. But I didn’t so much as move until after I heard the boat rumble away into the distance and out of the harbor.

  —

  I’d been exhausted at work and wanted nothing more than to come home, eat and crash. I barely had the energy to prepare dinner but managed to throw together grilled cheese.

  With my spatula, I gave the sandwich a little flip and waited for the other side to toast. There was a knock at my door, followed by Mason’s voice.

  “Honey, I’m home.” He popped the door open and stepped inside. “Dinner again? You shouldn’t have.”

  “I didn’t.” I grabbed a plate and slid the sandwich onto it.

  “You still mad?”

  “I’m not mad.”

  “Okay.” He shoved his hands in his pockets. “So I forgot your computer last night. Mind if I grab it now?”

  I waved my hand in the general direction of my laptop sitting on the kitchen table. “Be my guest.”

  “You seriously can’t stay mad forever.” He slid in the booth and tapped his fingers on my laptop.

  “I’m not mad. Look, see? A peace offering.” I slid the sandwich in front of him then pulled out two new slices of bread.

  “I can’t eat your sandwich.” He stood and came around behind me. The front of his body brushed up against the back of mine. “But I will make my own.” He grabbed the butter knife and reached for the bread in my hands. “Scoot over.”

  I surrendered the sandwich and stepped out of his way. “You should really try making yourself more comfortable in my home.”

  “Thanks. I will.” He pulled out more bread and cheese to make a second sandwich.

  I rolled my eyes and settled into the bench seat.

  He glanced at me. “I meant what I said this morning.” The pan sizzled as he pressed the spatula against the first sandwich followed by the second. “I honestly didn’t mean to make you this upset.”

  But the problem wasn’t really what he’d said. It was my own confusion with the situation because the more time I had to think about it, the more I knew he was right. “What you said didn’t upset me.”

  “Then what is it?” He sat in front of me, his plate stacked two sandwiches high. “Tell me what I can do to fix it.”

  “How can you be so sure this”—I motioned between us—“will work? You hardly know me. You aren’t in town but for a few weeks. Why waste your time?”

  Mason set his sandwich down and leaned back, cocking one eyebrow as he studied me for a second. “You really think you’re a waste of time?”

  I shrugged.

  “Whether it’s a few days or a few weeks, you’re not a waste of my time. I like hanging out with you.” He picked his sandwich back up but paused before biting into it. “I had a friend tell me recently that if she was m
aking a mistake it was her mistake to make. I had to let her do things her way.” He smiled and shook his head. “But I kept wondering, why intentionally set yourself up for failure, you know? Why not avoid it? Except now it makes sense.” He motioned between us as I’d done. “This is not accidental. I know exactly what I’m doing. And you do too. The way I see it, things may not work, but you’re definitely worth the effort.” He crammed his sandwich into his mouth, like he hadn’t just dropped something huge between us.

  He was going to drive me crazy, but at least I could say I hadn’t been bored since he came into my life.

  And though it scared me, I kind of wanted to see where things went from here too.

  I sighed. “One day at a time?”

  “That’s all I’m asking for.”

  I nodded. “Okay, then.”

  Chapter 15

  Felicity

  Things got a little easier after our conversation. There wasn’t as much pressure on me to try and define what was going on with Mason. I didn’t expect it to last beyond his stay, but that was okay, because I was living in the moment. I couldn’t control anything beyond that, but it was easier to not think about it.

  We also fell into a place where every day when the boat came in, he’d pop over for dinner if I wasn’t working. On the days I was, he’d eat at Eddie’s. It was nice, and I genuinely liked spending time with him…and kissing him. Like really, I don’t think I’d ever spent so much time kissing a guy, wanting to kiss a guy, or thinking about kissing a guy. He was slowly consuming me…and I had no complaints.

  The evening before my day trip with Mason, Isla came over. Getting her on a boat never happened, so when she showed up and actually wanted to come inside, I knew something was up.

  “I gave Mason the last of my medicine, so I hope you don’t start feeling sick.” I offered her a bottled water then sat on the couch.

  “It’s okay.” She pressed her hand to her stomach. “So far, so good.” She plopped down next to me. “Are you excited about your trip tomorrow?”

  “Yeah. I’m looking forward to meeting his aunt and seeing more of her work. She has a website, and her stuff looks amazing.”

  “I think it’s cool you’re getting more into your photography.” She pulled her dark hair back into a sleek ponytail. “How do you feel about the long car ride with Mason?”

  “A week ago, it kind of freaked me out. Like what would we talk about, right? But now I’m looking forward to it. Conversation comes easy with him.” I shrugged. “You should really get to know him better. He’s a cool guy.”

  “A hot conversationalist. Sounds like your perfect match.”

  I smiled. “He’s fun. And he’s a good friend. Not too sure about the perfect match part.”

  She groaned and threw her head back. “Oh my God, you are stubborn.”

  “It’s not that. We’re taking it day by day. I’m not looking for Mr. Perfect Match.”

  “Okay, fine, if he’s just Mr. Right Now, then have you thought more about what I said? About using him as your ticket out of here?”

  I frowned and shook my head. “I can’t do that to him.”

  She grinned. “Hello? Because you like him. Do you not hear yourself?”

  “As a person. A friend. I wouldn’t use a friend like that.”

  Her expression turned serious. “Friends help each other out.”

  I crossed my arms, knowing how hard it was to win an argument with Isla when she was on a roll like this.

  “Let’s say, you talk to him. Tell him how bad you want out of this town. Tell him you need somewhere to crash for a few weeks while you get a job and find a place of your own. And he says he’d be happy to help. Then what?”

  “If you so much as think about telling him this, I will never speak to you again. This isn’t like sharing my third date kissing rule. This is big, Isla. I’m not messing around.” I gave her a stern look. The face that said I wasn’t kidding. And as my best friend, she’d know I meant business.

  She put her hands up. “I’d never do that. I’m just saying, you have a lot of car time to talk tomorrow. Say it comes up. Would you turn down the help?”

  “Yes.” I stood and dropped my plastic water bottle into recycling. “End of discussion.”

  “Maybe he knows someone who needs a roommate? Someone you could split rent with.”

  “Isla. Enough. I’m not asking for his help.”

  “That’s it. That’s what this is about. You think asking for help makes you weak? Or like you’d be indebted to him? But that’s not true. Everyone needs help.”

  “Yeah, and sometimes you try to help and end up fucking their whole life up.” I’d raised my voice and really hadn’t meant to. I lowered it and added, “I’m not putting that on someone else.”

  The expression on Isla’s face said it all. She wasn’t mad that I’d snapped. No, her expression was one of pity. “You didn’t send Brody to that party. You didn’t tell him to sleep with that girl. You didn’t fuck up his life.”

  “Didn’t I though? I broke his heart. He was angry. He was hurting. I did that to him.”

  “He made choices. Ones that changed his life, but it’s not your fault. Brody could be playing baseball right now, but he’s not, because he chose not to. Stop blaming yourself.”

  I threw my hands up. “Whatever. It doesn’t matter now. If I ever leave this town, I do it on my own. If it’s the wrong choice, or I screw up down the road, it’s on me. No one else.”

  “Okay.”

  Okay? What was the deal with that word lately? It’s as if everyone felt the need to pacify me or something. What the hell was happening?

  “I’m sorry.” I shook my head. “I don’t know what’s going on with me. I’m…”

  “Scared?”

  I shrugged. “Maybe.”

  “It’s okay. I feel that way too. Some days I feel like everything will work out, then other days I have no idea what the hell I’m doing. Look at me. I’m in love with some guy who’s completely oblivious to it. I really have no room to be judging anyone.”

  “You’re not judging me. You’re only trying to help. So thank you.”

  She stood and smiled. “I want you to be happy again. And call me crazy, but when you’re with Mason, I think you’re more than just a little happy.”

  She was right. It wasn’t like I’d been going through life miserable or anything, but with Mason, I was happier.

  He made me laugh, he listened, he understood…and he could kiss. God, could he kiss. Like our mouths depended on each other for some life-sustaining property. And maybe they did, because when we’d finally break free, it was as if all the oxygen was ripped from my lungs, and I wanted nothing more than to dive in and inhale it all once more.

  “You okay there?” Isla’s tone held humor and snapped me from my thoughts.

  “Yeah. And you’re right. About everything.” I smiled.

  “Of course I am.” She batted her eyelashes, then her eyes widened. “I almost forgot! The real reason for my visit.” She dug through her purse.

  I knew she had an ulterior motive. She wouldn’t brave motion sickness without one.

  “Stick out your hand.”

  “Uh…”

  “Just do it.” She nodded with a big grin. “Close your eyes too.”

  “What are you up to?” I stared at her, but clearly she had no plans to give up, so I shoved my hand out and closed my eyes.

  “A little present for your trip tomorrow. Never know what six hours in a car can lead to.” She placed something in my hand and wrapped my fingers closed around it. “Enjoy.”

  Candy? I squeezed the plastic packaging, then my eyes flew open. “Oh my God, Isla. Condoms? Seriously?”

  She clapped her hands and nodded like one of my nieces after drawing me artwork to hang on the fridge.

  “I don’t need this. You know my rules.” I tried to shove it back in her hands but she turned away.

  “Doesn’t hurt to be prepared.”

>   “Isla, no. This is asking for trouble. If I don’t have these, there’s less opportunity.” I tried to stick them in her purse but she shifted before I could reach it.

  “It’s more trouble if you don’t have them.”

  “You are ridiculously stubborn.” I held the string of condoms between us and waved them at her. “Just take them. Go use them on Colby.”

  “I wish. We both know you’ll need them before me.” She pushed my hand back. “Put them in your purse. Just in case.” She shrugged. “You’ll thank me later.”

  “No.” I waved them again. “Seriously, I’ll throw them away if you don’t ta—”

  “Knock knock.” The door popped open, and Mason stepped in as he’d grown accustomed to doing.

  I yanked my hand behind my back and he paused. A slow smile tugged up his lips.

  “Was that…?” He pointed at my arm.

  “It’s nothing. It’s girl stuff. Isla’s.”

  He glanced at Isla then back at me, looking all too amused.

  I huffed. “What are you doing here? You told me you were having dinner with your aunt and uncle.”

  “Aunt April isn’t feeling well. We rescheduled.”

  Isla smiled. “I was leaving. Have fun tomorrow.”

  With a smirk, Mason pointed at my arm. “Shouldn’t you give Isla back her girl stuff?”

  “She can keep it.” Isla practically danced up the stairs.

  “Isla…”

  She glanced back, and Mason waited to see what I’d do. I finally rolled my eyes, knowing there was no way out of this. I balled them into one hand, hoping I could discard them when he wasn’t looking.

  She waved. “ ’Bye.”

  “See you later,” Mason said as the door shut, but his gaze remained on me.

  “Quit looking at me like that.”

  He kept grinning.

  “You didn’t see whatever you think you saw.”

  “What do you think I think I saw? Man, that’s confusing.” He rubbed his chin. “Guess you should just show me what you’re hiding behind your back.”

  “It’s girl stuff. You don’t want to see it.”

  “I have a sister. I don’t mind.” He tucked his hand into his pocket and rocked on his heels. “So are you going to show me, or…” He took a step closer and I bumped into the couch.