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Just a Little Kiss

Page 26

by Renita Pizzitola


  “Is this true?” I pointed to the picture in front of me. “Did it all start here?”

  He practically whispered his response. “Yeah.”

  I stared at the photo, at his expression, the one I’d studied for hours after finding him in it, and asked, “What were you thinking about? Do you remember?”

  “Of course I do.” He shifted his weight. “That night was when I realized there was no way I could walk away from you at the end of the summer.”

  “But you did.”

  “I thought you’d used me. That you were leaving. And it hurt. I wanted the pain gone. So I pushed it away. I pushed you away.” He knelt beside me. “Before you, I thought I knew what it felt like to love someone. And what it felt like to have that person not love you back. But God, was I wrong. The pain that comes with it…I didn’t know it would make me feel broken and hopeless, vulnerable and angry, and…crushed. It was like all that good stuff we had somehow amplified the bad.” He rubbed his eyes then pinched the bridge of his nose. “It’s hard to put into words, and I’m sorry if I’m not making sense.”

  But he made perfect sense. Instead of excitement, there was pain. Instead of hope, there was fear. Instead of love, there was heartbreak. It was the joy and happiness of falling…in reverse.

  “I know what you’re trying to say, but you have one part wrong.” I picked up one of the pictures. “I did love you back.”

  “And that will always be the thing I regret losing most.”

  But that was where he was wrong. He couldn’t lose something I’d never fully given. Which was my mistake. I’d let fear and uncertainty hold my emotions at bay for far too long, and I was done. It was time to let go and accept what he had to offer and give him my everything in return.

  “When you were mad and hurt, did it change the way you felt about me?”

  He shook his head. “Of course not.”

  I shifted to see him better. His hair still hung in his eyes, and I wanted to push it back to better see them.

  He went on. “You’re the only person I’ve ever felt this way about. And though it’d make life a whole hell of a lot easier, I can’t turn those feelings on and off.”

  “Exactly.”

  He finally flipped his hair from his eyes, and I could see the little line forming between his brows. “Exactly?”

  “You were mad and said hurtful things, but you still cared. You’re here because you wanted to be sure I knew that, right?”

  He nodded, still not catching where I was going.

  “I was mad and said hurtful things too. But like you, I can’t turn on and off the way I feel.”

  His expression sank a little. “So you can’t forgive me? You’re still angry.”

  “You know, I have one too. A moment when I knew things would be different with you. For me…” I flipped over the photo in my hands so he could read the words: It all started here. Then I leaned in and kissed him. It was sweeter than our first kiss but held about ten thousand times more emotion.

  And as our mouths moved together in a kiss that was as passionate as it was unhurried, and as sensual as it was familiar, I knew that when it came to Mason, I wanted the highs, the lows and the in-betweens. Thanks to him, I was no longer scared of life and all its unknown variables. I didn’t fear love with all its complexities. Nor did I need to control what came next. I could simply live because he was my constant.

  I pulled back and said, “That day at Colby’s I was excited and anxious about you kissing me. Which I couldn’t understand at the time. But I think some part of me knew nothing with you would ever be simple. And I mean that in the best possible way. What started that day has only grown from there, and though we’ve fought, I can’t turn my feelings off either. They’re still there. Still on.” I took a deep breath and frowned. “This all sounded so much better in my head.”

  His mouth curved into a grin as he wrapped his arms around my waist and tugged me into his lap.

  “What I’m trying to say is I love you, Mason.” I crossed my legs around him, draped my arms over his shoulders and pressed my forehead to his. “Even if you frustrate the hell out of me.”

  He placed his thumb on my chin, tilted my head up and grinned. “Says the most frustrating girl I know.” But then his expression grew serious as he stared into my eyes. “That day, when I said all those horrible things, I wasn’t just abandoning you, I was abandoning us. But I love you, Felicity, more than you’ll ever know. And I’m going to make it up to you. Day by day, minute to minute, you have me…until this isn’t what you want anymore.”

  “Well, you better free up your calendar”—I cupped his cheek and smiled—“because that day’s not coming.”

  Epilogue

  Mason

  FOUR MONTHS LATER…

  Felicity sat on my bed, legs crossed, computer in her lap, while I watched from across the room. She’d been quiet for the last ten minutes as she scrolled through the website I’d built her. Since my aunt had lent her the studio for Sunday shoots, Felicity’s portfolio had really grown. And though she was still her worst critic, I’d be the first to say it was an impressive one. Actually, Aunt Elise would be the first to say it. She raved on her constantly, like the daughter she’d never had and the mentee she’d always wanted combined into the perfect package. She loved Felicity almost as much as I did.

  Felicity tapped her keyboard, a tiny smile worked one corner of her mouth and I fixated on it, wanting to kiss it just to feel it spread to the other side.

  She lifted her hand and twirled a curl around her finger then, fuck me, she bit her bottom lip, and it took everything in my power to keep my ass in that chair. God, that drove me crazy in all the best possible ways.

  Her gaze lifted, and the smile finally worked its way across her mouth. “I love it.”

  “If you want any changes, we can make them. It won’t be hard.”

  “No.” She shook her head, glancing down at the screen. “It’s just right. Thank you for this.”

  “Hey, that’s all you. Those are your pictures. I only compiled them.”

  She closed the laptop, slid it onto the bed then walked over to me. “We make a good team.”

  That was an understatement. We made a fucking awesome team. She was my best friend, the person I loved and the girl I’d never get enough of. We were perfect together. It might have taken a bunch of stupid shit coming between us to figure that out, but when it came down to it, we’d always been right together.

  I wrapped my arms around her waist and tugged her into my lap.

  She straddled me and, now fully aware of how turned on I was, grinned. “What in the world have you been sitting here thinking about?”

  I pushed my hand up her neck and into her hair. “You.”

  With a little wiggle of her hips, she leaned forward and said, “I need something a bit more specific, please.”

  If she wanted details, I’d be happy to give her a rundown. I stood, lifting her with me, then walked across the room. “About the way you look when you get lost in your work.” I laid her down on the bed and settled over her. “And how you twirl your hair…and how you nibble your bottom lip…” I ran my nose up one side of her face to her ear. “Which leads me to think of another reason you bite your lip.”

  She sighed as her body squirmed under me.

  “Do you know what that reason is?”

  “You,” she whispered back.

  “Mm-hmm.” I licked her bottom lip then sank my teeth into it and tugged. “And when I’m the reason, that one is all mine. You know why?”

  “Because I’m yours.”

  Raising my head, I grinned down at her and nodded. “You’re mine.” But no matter how many times I claimed her, we both knew I was as much hers as she was mine.

  When I first packed my bags and headed down to Port Lucia, it had been my escape. My chance to get away. I’d rather take on the summer job from hell with crap for hours, seasickness and the never-ending smell of fish guts than stick around sl
owly losing Brinley to some other guy. But what I never expected to happen while running away from my problems was finding my solution. My answer. My Felicity. Because I knew, hands down, without question, that there was no one in this world more perfect for me than this girl right here. Everything in life happened for a reason, and I was thankful that mine got shit-turned-upside-down only to lead me straight to her.

  After we got back together, she’d also told me about her anxiety and panic attacks, and while it did make sense—the constant worrying, her sleeplessness and fear of the future—it didn’t change who she was to me. She was still the girl I fell in love with. I’d just accepted that as a part of her; giving it a name didn’t change anything, but it did help us both understand our relationship more. And the more time we spent together, the less her anxiety seemed to bother her. She told me it was because I made her feel grounded, that I was her constant, and the future didn’t seem so scary as long as she had me…and I hoped that was true. Because she had me all right. Hook, line and sinker. Damn fishing metaphors.

  She ran her finger over my forehead, brushing my hair back and sighed, “I’m so in like with you right now.”

  I kissed her wrist and smiled. Though I already knew the answer, I liked hearing her say it. “Just like?”

  She cupped my cheek and locked her gaze on mine. “All the L-words.”

  And nothing could ever compare to the way she looked at me right then, slowly drawing me in with those perfect fucking eyes filled with lust, longing…and love.

  I leaned in, tucked a curl behind her ear and whispered, “I love you too, Felicity.” Then I lowered myself, running a path of kisses down her body, and added, “Now, get comfortable because I’m going to be here awhile.”

  To Suzie

  Acknowledgments

  It feels as if it wasn’t long ago that I was creating Brinley’s world. A world I loved, with characters I adored. So when readers also became vested in that world, I was beyond thrilled, and even more excited when they fell in love with not just Brinley and Ryder, but the secondary characters as well. But one name in particular always seemed to reappear in readers’ questions—Mason. When it finally came time to give him his happily-ever-after, it was both exciting and scary. There were times when I felt like I’d never find the real Mason, and feared the story would be nothing more than words on a page…but then (thankfully) something shifted. Thanks to the wonderful advice from my super-amazing agent, Suzie Townsend, I added his point of view…and Mason, the real Mason, came to life. He was no longer just Brinley’s best friend, he wasn’t just Felicity’s love interest, he was this wonderfully complex guy and the heart of Just a Little Kiss. So thank you to Suzie for helping me find Mason’s voice. This book wouldn’t be what it is without your help!

  Also, thank you to the readers who have followed the Crush series and anxiously awaited Mason’s story. Your love for his character helped me set my personal bar high, and for that I thank you! If it weren’t for those expectations, he may not have come to life in the way he did.

  And to my editor Junessa Viloria—you never cease to amaze me with your ability to always see my vision and strengthen my work, all while providing tons of encouragement. Working with you on the Crush series has been a writer’s dream, and I can’t wait to dive into the next world together!

  I’d also like to thank Camden Leigh for being the world’s best critique partner! Not a day goes by that I don’t rely on your wonderful advice and help. No matter how short of notice (or how many times you’ve already read it) I can always count on you to pull through with one more read. I totally hit the critique partner lottery! And for that I’m so grateful.

  And to my family, friends and everyone else who puts up with my crazy writer demands, schedule and whims—thank you! Your support means the world to me, and I couldn’t do what I do without you.

  BY RENITA PIZZITOLA

  Just a Little Crush

  Just a Little Flirt

  Just a Little Kiss

  PHOTO: AIKEN PHOTO

  RENITA PIZZITOLA is the author of new adult contemporary romance and young adult fantasy. When not writing, she can be found feeding her caramel macchiato addiction and reading just about anything she can get her hands on. She lives in Austin, Texas, with her husband and two children.

  renitapizzitola.com

  Facebook.com/RenitaPizzitolaAuthor

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  Read on for a sneak peek of

  Addicted to You

  by Renita Pizzitola

  Coming soon from Flirt

  Chapter 1

  Isla

  Parties weren’t the same without my best friend.

  Well, they were technically the same people-wise, but the dynamic had completely shifted now that she’d moved away. Without her, I was the only girl—minus, of course, the occasional random date or temporary girlfriend. But when it came to the regular crew, I was the sole girl occupying the “just friends” spot. As in no benefits. But if I could change that with one Colby Callahan—would I ever.

  He was currently in a debate with his brother Landon over how to grill the perfect burger. They both laughed, clearly enjoying the discussion, though each pretended to be completely horrified by the other’s lack of burger knowledge.

  Colby, who was slightly taller than his older brother—or maybe it was just the extra inches his trademark baseball cap seemed to give him—reached over Landon’s shoulder and snatched the spatula. “Let the professional handle it,” he said.

  “Hey.” Landon sidestepped him. “Take the spatula, but watch the beer.” He turned around and caught me staring. “Can you believe this guy?”

  Thankfully, he seemed to think the staring was due to the spectacle they’d created. Somehow, he had no clue I was madly in love with Colby, and had been since elementary school. But how he had missed that fact was beyond me. In one way or another, most people seemed to have heard about my infatuation with the middle Callahan boy. Rumors were whispered, jokes made. Port Lucia was too small a town to miss it. Of course, all that told me was how very not interested Colby apparently was. He still treated me like the sister he’d never had, which I took as a pretty clear-cut sign that my crush was hopeless.

  But…I was a glutton for punishment. And there was that tiny chance that maybe he was as clueless as his brother, that he’d managed not to hear the rumors and jokes, that he didn’t know.

  So I’d decided that once and for all, I was going to find out how he really felt. Or at least get one freaking kiss before I go away to nursing school next fall.

  If Colby and I were never meant to be, fine. I’d reluctantly accept the crappy hand life had dealt me: consigned to being in love with a guy who saturated my life, yet was completely unavailable. But I wouldn’t live with the regret of not knowing what it was like to kiss him.

  Operation Seduce Colby was about to go down. Right away…as soon as I found the courage. Which at this rate would be never.

  Owen, the youngest of the Callahan boys, came outside with his phone in hand and a frown on his face.

  “Such bullshit,” he muttered. “Hey, I gotta run. Mom just texted that I have to come home. The storm shifted course and it’s picking up or something.”

  “No shit?” Landon pulled his phone out of his pocket and slid his finger over the screen.

  “Yeah.” Owen slouched against the wall. “She says it’s been upgraded.”

  “Whoa, it has.” Landon held his phone out for Colby, who’d turned around, halting the perfect-burger cook-off.

  He raised an eyebrow. “Hmm, looks like a tropical storm warning now.”

  Owen shook his head. “But it’s not a hurricane or anything.”

  Colby chuckled. “Sorry, man, that’s the problem with being the baby of the family. She cares too much.”

  Owen rolled his eyes and glanced around. He hated being the youngest of the group, but considering that he was still in high school,
he wouldn’t even be hanging out here had it not been for his last name. “Whatever. I’ll catch y’all later,” he grumbled as he trudged back inside.

  A few of the other guys pulled out their phones, probably to check the weather. We’d lived through plenty of tropical storms, so it wasn’t a huge deal, but I guess there was always that tiny bit of fear it’d escalate into a full-blown hurricane. And considering Colby and Landon lived right on the water…Yeah, it probably was not the best place to be in a real storm.

  “Damn.” Landon shoved his phone in his pocket. “Jack’s will be slammed tonight.”

  I laughed, pulled from my own thoughts. “I’ll never understand why people ride these things out in bars.”

  While Colby rose with the sun and spent long hours on the water working the family’s charter fishing business, Landon went in a very different direction, bartending at Jack’s Cove, one of the two bars in Port Lucia. It tended to attract the younger residents and vacationers, so it was always busiest in the summer. Pelican Pier, which had been around longer than anyone I’d known, brought in the locals, fishermen, and retirees. I couldn’t recall a single time when there wasn’t a handful of cars parked in front of that weatherworn beach bar. But on a night like tonight, they’d both be crowded.

  Landon grinned back. “No amount of fear can survive friends, alcohol, and good conversation.”

  One of the guys raised his glass in agreement. “Well said. And the very reason I think I’ll join you.” He chugged the remainder of his beer, then tossed his can in the nearby trash bin. “Anyone want a ride?”

 

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