Elegy

by Amanda Hocking

“How much longer did it take you?” Alex asked as he wrapped his arms around her.

  “To fall in love with you?”

  “Yeah. When did you actually know that you loved me?”

  “I’d liked you for a while, but I think I knew I loved you the first time we really kissed, when we were in the backyard under the stars. ”

  “Wow. It did take you a lot longer,” he said, and Gemma wished it hadn’t taken her so long. She’d missed out on so much time with him, and so many kisses.

  “Yeah, but I’m here now. ”

  She stood on her tiptoes and kissed him, pulling herself close to him. But just kissing him wasn’t enough, and maybe she’d known that when she came over here. She loved him completely, and she wanted to be with him completely.

  Still holding on to him, she took a step backward, and he followed, unwilling to stop kissing her, even for a second. Then she turned him around and pushed him back to the bed. Before he fell back, she grabbed the bottom of his shirt and peeled it off.

  His skin felt warm, and his muscles were firm and smooth underneath her. His hands roamed all over her, and he had her halter top up over her head in seconds. She’d had the foresight to skip putting on a bra today, and he took a moment to appreciate that.

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  Then they were kissing again, only this time her bare skin was pressed to his, and it was amazing how intimate that felt, how close she felt to him, and yet she still wanted to be closer.

  The monster inside her threatened to surface, but she wouldn’t let it. She wasn’t doing this to feed her cravings or satiate her hunger, and she refused to let the siren in her have any part of this. This was about her and Alex, and how much they loved each other.

  After she’d undone his pants, he rolled her over, and with surprising dexterity, he slid off her panties and shorts. For a moment, nothing more happened. The two of them lay naked together, kissing, and he took of one her hands, pressing it to the pillow above her head. His heart was pounding so hard, she could feel the rapid beat of his pulse in their entwined fingers.

  Then he stopped. Her free arm was around him, holding him to her, and he stared down into her eyes.

  “What?” she asked, afraid he might not want to continue.

  “I just want to remember this moment,” he said softly. “I want to remember everything about being here with you now and how utterly in love with you I am. ”

  “I love you, too,” she said because she was afraid to say more.

  Then his lips found hers again, kissing her desperately, and when he slid inside her, it hurt, but there was a strange beauty in the pain. In knowing that it was with him, that they were together in a way they’d never been with anyone else, and when he let go of her hand so he could wrap his arms around her, crushing her to him, she couldn’t imagine being able to feel this close to anyone.

  Afterward, she lay in his arms. He kissed the top of her head and rubbed the bare skin of her back, sending pleasurable shivers down her spine. He lay on his side, and her head was pressed against his chest, listening to the sound of his heart, and their legs were tangled together.

  For a moment, she wasn’t entirely sure where she ended, and he began, and there was something wholly perfect in that. She clung to him, savoring the moment and wishing that it would last forever.

  THIRTY-EIGHT

  Disillusion

  Gemma and Brian were talking beside her at the kitchen table, and Harper heard them. She was even nodding along and saying “mmm-hmm” in all the right spots. But she wasn’t really listening. Her head and her heart were a million miles away, wondering what she was going to do about Daniel.

  After he’d told her about his plans to become a siren and join Penn last night, she had spent a very long time trying to talk him out of it and debating with him. But his mind was made up, and in the end, she wasn’t sure that she actually disagreed with him.

  She didn’t want him to do it because she didn’t want him getting hurt, but in all honesty, if she were in his position, she’d probably do the exact same thing. To protect the people she loved, she’d be willing to sacrifice anything.

  But Harper was going to make damn sure that they’d tried every other option first. If there was a way to break the curse before Daniel got trapped into a life with Penn, then Harper was determined to find it.

  As soon as she’d gotten home last night, she’d pulled out the scroll. Diana had told her the curse was in the ink, and Pine had thought that the ink might consist of blood. It had reacted to water, Red Bull, and a number of other liquids that she’d exposed it to. But according to Gemma, it reacted strongest to a combination of the same liquids that made Gemma a siren.

  Gemma had told her about her failed attempt with Marcy to combine their blood and ocean water to erase the scroll. It hadn’t worked, but the scroll had a particularly strong reaction to these elements. It wasn’t until last night, when everyone was in bed, and Harper was struggling to sleep, that something occurred to her: They’d never tried just human blood on its own. It could be that simple.

  She hid in the bathroom and locked the door behind her. Using a sharp knife, she sliced along her finger deep enough to bleed. It wasn’t as much as she would’ve liked, but it was enough. The symbols began to glow beneath, shining brightly through her blood in a vibrant crimson.

  With her arms hugging herself tightly, she began to pray under her breath, hoping against all the odds that this might finally be it … and then the ink changed back to its usual color.

  “No, no, please. That can’t be it,” she murmured in a frantic whisper. “Dammit. This has to work. Please. ”

  Her attempts at squeezing out more blood failed miserably, and she only succeeded in rubbing off the dried blood instead of adding more. The ink didn’t glow again or disappear. The curse hadn’t been broken. She’d failed.

  In frustration, she threw it across the room. Then she sat back on the floor, leaning against the bath and sobbing quietly into her arms.

  So now, as her dad and a surprisingly cheerful Gemma talked, Harper found it impossible to concentrate or follow anything they were saying. All she could think about was that she’d failed her sister, her boyfriend, and, in a few days, everything would be gone.

  “Well, that all sounds fantastic then,” Brian said, responding to Gemma’s telling him about Pine’s translation of the scroll. “When you go see him, you can take the scroll with you again, and with his translations and what you know about the ink, you’ll be able to figure out what to do. Right?”

  “Yeah. ” Harper forced a smile and tried to sound convincing. “Right. ”

  “Yep,” Gemma agreed, but she stared down at the table.

  “How come neither of you sound excited about this?” Brian eyed the two of them. “Is there something you’re not telling me?”

  “No, I’m excited. ” Gemma smiled at him. “I’m just tired. Going away really took a lot out of me. ”

  It was hard to tell exactly how much things affected Gemma. Even when she claimed to be feeling terrible, her skin never paled, her eyes always twinkled, even her smile never lost its luster. The siren kept herself constantly camouflaged behind a mask of beauty.

  “What about you, Harper?” Brian asked.

  “Yeah. Everything’s great. ” Her voice cracked a little when she said that, and she hoped that they didn’t notice.

  “It’s getting late. ” Brian glanced up at the clock. “Are you girls going to visit your mom today?”

  It was Saturday, which meant it was time for their weekly visit to Briar Ridge, and somehow it had completely slipped Harper’s mind. She’d been making that same trek almost every week for the past eight years Nathalie had lived out there, and this was the first time she’d completely forgotten.

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  “I don’t think so,” Harper said. “I have so much going on, and I saw her on Wednesday. ”

  “Yo
u saw her this week?” Brian asked. “You didn’t tell me that. ”

  “Yeah, she’s been kinda anxious lately, so I just stopped in. ” Harper tried to play it down since she didn’t want to worry them. “She calmed down some, but Becky says the doctors might have to reevaluate her meds if she doesn’t relax. ”

  Gemma’s eyes widened, and she sat up straighter. “Oh my gosh, Harper. Is she okay?”

  “Yeah, she’ll be fine,” Harper tried to reassure her sister before she panicked. “She just needs some quiet and rest, so it’s actually probably better if we don’t visit today. ”

  “You will let me know if they have a team meeting, right?” Gemma asked sarcastically. “Or will you forget about that, too?”

  “What were you gonna do today then?” Brian asked.

  “There’s some dance down at the park for the At Summer’s End stuff,” Gemma said. “I was thinking of going down there with Alex and kinda do something normal for a change. ”

  “Daniel asked me to go to that tonight, too,” Harper said.

  She hadn’t really wanted to go, and he’d all but insisted. If they didn’t have much time left together, he wanted to spend it with her doing something nice.

  “Oh yeah? Well, that sounds good. ” Brian clapped his hands together and grinned. “You’ve both been working so hard lately, and it’ll be good for you to have a break from it. I promise I will spend the night scouring the scroll. You take the night off. I’ll take over. I’m the dad. You’re the kids. Act like it for a change. ”

  Reluctantly, Harper went up to her room to get changed. She’d opened up her closet to start looking for something suitable to wear, but that was as far as she’d gotten before Gemma came into her room.

  “Did you need something?” Harper asked.

  Gemma shut the door and walked over to her. Her golden eyes were serious, and she folded her arms over her chest. “What’s going on with you?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “You are barely here today. Did something happen?” She lowered her voice. “How are things really going with Daniel?”

  “Great. ” Harper looked away from her sister and started flipping through the outfits hanging in her closet. “Good thing I didn’t bring that many clothes with me to college. I think I left all my dresses here. ”

  “Is Daniel still…” Gemma trailed off.

  Harper swallowed hard as she pulled out a flowered dress. “We’ve come to an understanding. ” She held up the dress. “What do you think of this?”

  “He is,” Gemma surmised. “Harper, he doesn’t need to do that. Tell him not to. ”

  She sighed and hung the dress back, and finally turned to face her sister. “Gemma. It’s between me and Daniel, and we’ve got it all figured out. ”

  “Harper. ”

  “Everything is fine, okay?” Harper reached out and squeezed Gemma’s arm reassuringly. “Now just go get ready. ”

  Gemma wanted to argue more, but Harper wouldn’t hear of it. She shooed her sister out of her room and closed the door behind her. Leaning forward, she rested her forehead against the door and took deep breaths until the urge to cry finally passed.

  To help her mood, she put Metric on the stereo and turned it up loud. She picked out a light summer dress that landed right at the knee, so her scar would be well hidden. Then, as she sang along with the music, she used the curling iron to add loose curls to her hair and carefully applied her makeup.

  When she was done, she stood in front of the mirror for a few minutes. Not so much admiring herself or even making sure that she looked good. Just trying to convince herself that everything would be okay and that she could make it through the night.

  “You will not worry. You will not cry,” Harper told her reflection. “You will forget anything that makes you sad, just for tonight. You will enjoy the time you have with Daniel, and you will laugh and have fun. ”

  There was nothing to be said, and nothing more to do. She turned off the music, then headed downstairs.

  Alex had already arrived, and he was sitting on the couch next to Gemma. Her sister looked radiant, and it wasn’t just because of how lovely she looked in her halter dress. Or the way her hair was pulled up, with a pink carnation pinned above the loose curls.

  There was a glow about her, and it wasn’t the one that came from being a siren. She and Alex kept looking into each other’s eyes, their expressions soft and doey. Their hands were intertwined, and when she laughed, Gemma would lean into him. Like they were sharing some private secret between the two of them.

  Even though they were just sitting in the living room, and they weren’t really doing anything, Harper felt like she was intruding. She tried to duck by on her way to the kitchen without interrupting, but Gemma caught sight of her.

  “You look really pretty, Harper,” Gemma said, and Harper stopped her escape to the kitchen and turned back to smile at them.

  “I didn’t see you sneak down the stairs. ” Alex stood up, so Gemma did, too, her hand still entangled with his. “You do look really nice. I don’t see you in a dress very often. ”

  “Thanks. You guys look great, too. ” She self-consciously smoothed out her dress. “Are you waiting for something?”

  “Yeah, we’re waiting for you, actually,” Alex said, then glanced back at Gemma, as if to confirm that he’d said the right thing.

  “We thought it might be fun to all go to the dance together,” Gemma said.

  “Oh yeah. ” Harper smiled. “That would be fun. ”

  It might be fun with all four of them, but currently, Harper felt like a third wheel. Alex leaned over and whispered something in Gemma’s ear, which made her cheeks flush as she smiled widely.

  When the doorbell rang a minute later, Harper practically ran to answer it. She wanted to see Daniel anyway, but now she was looking for a reprieve from awkwardly watching the two lovebirds.

  “Wow,” Daniel said when she opened the door, and his eyes widened in awe. “You look really beautiful. ”

  “And you look very handsome. ”

  Wearing a crisp white dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up to the elbows and a skinny blue tie that made the flecks in his eyes pop, she’d never seen him look quite as sharp. He still wore jeans and his old Converse sneakers, but they somehow made him look even sexier.

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  “I should’ve gotten you a corsage,” he said.

  She laughed. “This isn’t prom. ”

  “Still. ” He shrugged. “You deserve a flower. ”

  “So, we’re all ready then. ” She stepped away from the door, so she could call to her dad, who was in the kitchen. “Dad, Daniel’s here, so we’re heading out. ”

  “Hold on. ” Brian hurried in to stop them before they took off. Alex and Gemma had edged closer to the door, and when Brian came in, his stern gaze moved between Alex and Daniel. “You guys know the deal, right? Be home by midnight, both my daughters safe and sound and intact. You think Penn is bad, but she’s got nothing on an angry father. ”

  Gemma groaned. “Dad. ”

  “We’ll have them home by midnight, Mr. Fisher,” Alex promised.

  “You better,” he warned them.

  Gemma shook her head, but she stood on her tiptoes to kiss Brian on the cheek before heading out the door. “’Night, Dad. ”

  “’Bye, Dad,” Harper said, and started following her sister, but she felt like she was shirking her duty. She’d had one foot out the door, but she turned around to come back in. “I should stay and—”

  “No. Go. ” Her dad put his hand on her arm and gently pushed her toward Daniel. “I’m just as capable of dumping soda and water on something as you. Now go. Get out of here. Have fun. ”

  THIRTY-NINE

  Summer’s End

  The lush grass of Bayside Park had been covered in smooth corkboard for easier dancing. Paper lanterns on fairy lights were strung above even though
it was still light out. The sun had begun to dip below the horizon, and the sky was lavender and orange, with the first twinkling of stars breaking through.

  Just off the dance floor, Harper sat in a folding chair next to Daniel, sipping the punch he’d brought over. An older David Bowie song played from speakers surrounding the park, and Harper watched the people dance.

  It was a beautiful night, and one of the last true nights of summer, so the park was packed. It was hard for her to see Gemma and Alex through the crowded dance floor, but she spotted them, dancing pressed together even though the song was up tempo.

  Her gaze didn’t stay on them for long, since Marcy and her date, Kirby, had stolen the show. She’d worn black boardshorts and a polka-dot top, but it was clear that the shorts had been chosen because they allowed more freedom of movement.

  Marcy was darting and spinning and doing all kinds of moves like she had secretly spent the past ten years as a classically trained dancer. Kirby hurried to keep up with her, but, fortunately, Marcy was such a crazy good dancer that she made him look good.

  “Wow,” Daniel said as he watched her spin. “Marcy is intense. Did you have any idea she could do this?”

  “No, I had no clue. ” Harper shook her head. “I’m starting to realize that I literally know nothing about her. ”

  “It’s so strange seeing her engage in normal human activities. ” Daniel tilted his head, as if trying to get a better look at Marcy. “And she’s dating that guy, too. What do you suppose they talk about?”

  “My guess? El chupacabra. ”

  He nodded. “That would make sense. ”

  With David Bowie still crooning about monsters, Gemma and Alex broke through the crowd and walked toward where Harper and Daniel sat. Gemma was grinning so wide, it almost looked painful.

  “What are you two doing? Are you just gonna sit here all night?” Gemma asked as she reached them.

  “I danced. We danced. ” She motioned between herself and Daniel. “I’m just not very good at it. ”

  They had danced, for about half a song, but the truth was that Harper didn’t feel much like dancing. It was taking most of her energy to smile, and she didn’t have much left to pretend to know how to move to the music.

  “You can’t sit out all night,” Gemma persisted.

  “We’re not,” Harper told her.

  “Oh my gosh!” Gemma exclaimed when the song changed to “All Alright” by Fun. “This song. You have to dance this. ”

  “I don’t know. ” Harper was perplexed by Gemma’s excitement. “It doesn’t even really seem like a dance song. ”

  Gemma had apparently given up on persuading Harper to dance and turned her attention elsewhere. “Daniel. Come on. ” She extended her hand to him. “Dance with me. ”

  “Sure. ” He took her hand and stood up, letting her lead him out to the dance floor.

  Alex had his hands in his pockets when he looked down at Harper. “So that leaves me and you. ”

  “We don’t have to dance. ”