Stepbrother Romance Complete Series
Page 18
This was wrong. All wrong.
What if he wouldn’t do it? What if the thought of kissing me was so repulsive to him that he would rather forfeit the dare to do something potentially far worse than a simple kiss? As all of these unwelcome thoughts ran through my mind at an alarming pace, Seth threw back a shot of tequila and poured out the second.
“Mia, you can’t let him do this,” Amy said, pulling on my arm. “It’s not right.”
I couldn’t reply. For the first time in my life, I was struck dumb, and fascinated with watching Seth knock back his third shot of tequila. Then he got to his feet.
My heart hammered in my chest as I watched him move the two steps it took until he was stood in front of me. I stared at his face, hoping for some indication of what he was thinking and feeling, but he kept his expression blank so I couldn’t work out what was going on in his head. My own mind was a jumble of thoughts—each one flitting by so quickly that I struggled to latch onto it fully.
I wanted this, just not in this way, but did Seth want it?
He reached down, grabbed hold of my hands then pulled me up into a standing position. I stared up at him, feeling like I was in a daze. I couldn’t believe this was happening to me—couldn’t believe the fact that even though my dream was about to come true, it left a sour taste in my mouth.
Seth looked down at one of the boys in the circle. “Time us,” he said curtly.
After he’d received a raised eyebrow and reluctant nod, Seth took hold of my face. And for the very first time, in front of a room full of people, my stepbrother kissed me.
I gasped at the immediate intrusion of his tongue sliding into my mouth with purpose. He opened his mouth wider, kissing me harder, and a whimper escaped me, eaten up by the chasm of his hungry mouth.
Time seemed to stand still as my heart beat an erratic tune against my ribcage. Seth grunted, his tongue exploring my mouth and then I was dragged up against his hard body as he deepened the kiss. I felt like I was flying—soaring above my body, detached somehow from what was happening to me yet present at the same time. I’d never experienced anything so perfect—so profound. There was nothing I could do but cling onto his arms and kiss him back with a hunger that consumed me.
The slow, wet, drugging kisses went on and on. But I was aware that the kiss had an expiration date—that the clock was counting down and that all too soon, it would end. I cursed myself for not daring Dean to spin in a circle for an entire minute so that he could have reciprocated in kind. I didn’t want it to end. It was all I had hoped for and more. So much more.
It was everything.
“Time,” someone called and I hated that person for interrupting the most intense moment of my life.
But Seth didn’t stop. He kissed me harder, deeper.
“Time,” someone said again, louder than before and on this occasion, Seth took notice and pulled his lips from mine.
I felt bereft. Cheated. And the only thing that appeased me somewhat was the sight of Seth, breathing as heavily as I was—of seeing the look in his eyes. Hunger. Lust—surprise. He’d enjoyed the kiss, maybe as much as I had. But then his expression cleared and his cocky grin returned as he met the open-mouthed, shocked gazes of everyone in the room before retaking his seat.
He turned to the next person sitting in the circle. “Truth or dare?” he asked, his voice strong and steady.
It took me what felt like a full minute to sit down again and unlike Seth, I couldn’t meet anyone’s gaze. I was afraid of what they’d see written on my face. But I did manage to look at one person. Amy. And in that moment, I realized that she knew everything I’d been successfully hiding from her for the past year—that I was hopelessly and irrevocably in love with my stepbrother, Seth. And the expression on her face as she came to realize the enormity of the situation? Pity.
She felt sorry for me.
And just like that, I came crashing back down to earth with a bump.
Chapter Four
I sent a quick text to my friend, Ethan then walked into the kitchen, distracted by our conversation. I stopped dead just inside the door when I saw Mia with her nose in the refrigerator. If I’d known she was there, I wouldn’t have gone in. It had been a week since that asshole Dean had dared me to kiss her and I’d avoided her like the plague ever since.
I should have turned down the dare, but I’d been weak. My desire to kiss her had overridden common sense. I contemplated backing out of the room when she turned and saw me standing there. A blush spread across her cheeks. I liked it.
“Oh, hi,” she mumbled, unwilling or unable to meet my gaze. Or both.
“Hey,” I returned, heading for the refrigerator to grab some water. I pulled out a bottle then screwed open the top and took a long drink. “What are you up to?”
Her eyes widened as if she was surprised I was talking to her which was understandable when you considered the fact that I’d hardly spoken two words to her in the past week.
“Just making a sandwich,” she informed me. “You want one?”
I shook my head. “No thanks. I’m good.”
She shrugged and silence descended. I should have left the room, but some masochistic part of me willed me to stay and watch her make her sandwich. I wondered idly if she was uncomfortable with my presence. I was desperate to know how she felt about the kiss. For me, it had been better than I could have imagined. Wild and intense.
Her surprise at the dare had been evident and I’d half expected her to object. But she hadn’t and when I’d kissed her, it had taken her all of two seconds to return the kiss with an enthusiasm that had made my dick about as hard as a lead pipe. And of course, I’d spent nearly every hour of every day since thinking about it and wanting it to happen again. But I couldn’t let it happen. Not now, not ever. Still, what would be the harm in finding out how she felt about it? A lot, the sensible part of my brain said. I didn’t listen to that part.
I took a few steps closer, crowding her up against the table’s edge then I picked up a slice of cucumber and ate it. Mia looked over her shoulder and frowned at me, but she didn’t say anything, just kept on making her sandwich, eyes on her task. Despite my sudden nerves, I couldn’t stop the grin from spreading across my face. This was more fun than it should be.
“Tell me,” I said, feigning disinterest. “Have you thought much about that kiss?”
She froze, the slice of ham she held hovering over the sandwich.
“Tell me, Mia,” I prompted, leaning in against her ear. “And be honest.”
I expected her to mumble a noncommittal reply or even to get angry with me and tell to stop teasing her, but what she did next was completely out of the realms of anything I could have imagined. She put down the ham, turned around in the confined space I’d left her with and met my gaze head on.
“Yes,” she admitted. “I have been thinking about it. I’ve been thinking about it a lot, actually.”
What was I supposed to say or do after that little bombshell? There was only one thing for it. I put my hands on her hips, leaned down so that my face was inches from hers and whispered, “Do you want me to kiss you again?”
She lifted her chin, almost defiantly, holding my gaze with ease. “Yes,” she whispered back.
I knew it was wrong. I knew that the best thing for the both of us would have been for me to turn on my heel and get out of the room as quickly as my feet would carry me, leaving my stepsister in peace. But I didn’t do that. I couldn’t. I wasn’t strong enough to leave her alone. Instead, I leaned in, closing the small distance of the last few inches that separated us and I pressed my lips to hers. My mom chose that very second to walk through the front door and call out to us.
“Seth, Mia, are you home?”
Mia tore her lips from mine and I was split between cursing my mom for the interruption and thanking her.
“We’re in the kitchen!” I shouted back.
If I’d thought that Mia’s cheeks had been red before, I’d been mistak
en. Now, they were practically glowing. She spun around, her hands fumbling with the sandwich fixings just as my mom walked into the room.
“Hey kids,” she greeted. “You will not believe the day I’ve just had.”
I tried to show some interest in my mom’s story, but really all of my attention was on Mia. What was it about her that drew me in like a moth to a flame? She was beautiful, yes, but so were dozens of girls we’d gone to school with. She was sweet, thoughtful and kind too, but were they such unique traits? And she wasn’t the only woman who had ever looked at me with such longing. Maybe it was a combination of all those things, or maybe it was none of them. Perhaps it was something that was just intrinsically her that I couldn’t get enough of—some code or other embedded in her DNA that attracted me. Regardless, I was lost in her wholeheartedly and in that moment in time, I couldn’t bring myself to care why.
Mia looked across and met my gaze with that damn shy smile on her lips and I was seconds away from revealing all to my mom. How upset would she be? I knew her well enough to know that she’d be devastated. She saw Mia and me as brother and sister which is exactly what we had been for years. I got the feeling that if my mom and stepdad knew that I was in love with Mia, they’d do everything in their power to keep us apart. And who could blame them?
Chapter Five
I’d tossed and turned all night, but sleep had evaded me. I plumped up my pillows for what had to be the tenth time, but it was no use. I just couldn’t get comfortable enough or get my mind to shut down so that I could fall asleep. The almost kiss with Seth that morning dominated my thoughts.
I looked at the glowing numbers on my alarm clock. Five after two. I’d been lying there in the dark for over three hours. I thought about reading a book for a while but quickly nixed the idea. When I got into a story that I didn’t want to end, I could easily stay up all night until I’d finished it and that wasn’t what I needed. Maybe it would help if I had something hot to drink. A cup of hot chocolate would be bound to make me sleepy. Mind made up, I got out of bed then crossed the room and pulled open the bedroom door.
I’d barely taken one step out into the hall when Seth rounded the corner and headed my way.
“Hey, sis,” he slurred.
I folded my arms. “Are you drunk?”
He snorted. “Hardly.”
But as he neared, he appeared to be swaying and when he finally stopped in front of me I could smell the alcohol on his breath.
“Where have you been?” I asked, trying not to let the jealousy I felt show on my voice. “Have you been out with that girl?”
Even in the darkness I could see the frown on Seth’s face.
“What girl?”
I sighed. “The one from the party. Malibu Barbie.”
Seth looked over his shoulder at our parents’ bedroom door and without replying to my snide remark or saying anything further, he pushed me back into my bedroom then closed the door behind us.
“Malibu Barbie? I think you’re referring to Sasha. Which is her name. What’s up, Mia? Are you jealous? Because it’s not like you to be so bitchy about someone you don’t even know.”
Crap. He was right. And I hated that he’d called me out on what I’d said. I didn’t want to be some jealous person who put down other girls. That wasn’t me. I hated bitchiness and slut shaming and was usually the first person to call someone out on it. And yet here I was doing exactly the same sort of thing. I didn’t want to feel this way—so helpless and so completely out of my comfort zone.
“I’m sorry,” I said. “You’re right. I am jealous.”
Seth let out a little growl. “I’m not seeing her. That was just a kiss at a party. It was nothing—meant nothing.” He shook his head. “Why am I explaining myself to you? You’ve got to stop this, Mia. You’ve got to get the idea of us as a couple out of your head because it’s not going to happen.
“It can’t. You’re my sister and that’s all you’re ever going to be. The sooner you accept that fact the better it’ll be for the both of us.”
His words stung and I recoiled from them as if they were a physical blow.
“Why?” I asked, suddenly angry. “Why can’t it ever happen between us? It’s not wrong, not if we feel something for each other. Do you?” I asked. “Do you feel anything for me? Anything other than brotherly affection? Tell me the truth.”
“That’s irrelevant!” he snapped. “Because nothing is ever going to happen.”
I was really angry now. “Really? So what was all that about in the kitchen the other day then, huh? If you don’t feel anything for me, then why kiss me? What happened at the party doesn’t count. It was a dare. I get that. Although you didn’t have to do it. You could have told that idiot no when he dared you. You could have taken a forfeit.”
Seth ran a hand over his head. “Look, it was a mistake. One little mistake. Can’t you allow me that?”
“One little…” I glared at him. “A mistake is picking up the wrong toothpaste in the store. Shoving your tongue down someone’s throat is not a mistake, it’s a choice. And what was that all about in the kitchen this morning, huh? Another mistake? There was no one there telling you what to do that time, Seth. It was all you. And you still kissed me. Why? Why do that if you don’t want me?”
“Of course I want you!” he exclaimed. “Don’t you see that? I want you like I’ve never wanted anyone.”
My heart filled with happiness at his admission and I took a step towards him only to frown when he took two steps back.
“We can’t always get what we want in this life, Mia, regardless of how much we want it. There are consequences to our actions. People could get hurt. People that we love. Could you live with yourself if you broke mom and dad’s hearts?”
Seth scrubbed a hand over his shaved head again, the frustration evident on his handsome face.
I couldn’t live with myself if that happened. Of course I couldn’t. But I didn’t think it would happen. Our parents would understand. I was sure of that. They loved us and what they wanted more than anything was for us to be happy. Now that I’d got Seth to admit that he had feelings for me, I wasn’t going to let him push me away. Didn’t we deserve to be happy as much as the next person?
“I’m in love with you,” I admitted, surprised at how strong and steady my voice was when inside I was a nervous wreck. I’d never put myself out there like that before. It was terrifying but also oddly liberating. “I want to stop pretending that I don’t feel anything for you and I want you to do the same.”
“Don’t!” Seth said, holding his arm out in front of him as if to somehow ward me off. “Don’t say it. Don’t even think it. We can’t, Mia.”
I moved a step closer then reached out and took hold of his hand. I brought it down to my waist before moving closer so that I was standing in his personal space.
“We can,” I said. “Everything will work out for the best. You’ll see. You just have to stop resisting and give in to this. Please, Seth. You want this. Just give in.”
I didn’t let him reply. I took the last step forward, closing the distance between us then I leaned up on my tippy toes and kissed him. This time there was no hesitation on my part. I didn’t have to worry about the fact that we had an audience. There was no one to witness what was going on but us and that fact was freeing.
I slid my tongue into his mouth and kissed him like my life depended on it because, in a way, it did. What happened between us in the next few moments had the capacity to determine our entire future happiness so it wasn’t in my best interests to hold back. And I didn’t. I kissed him hungrily—greedily, like I was starved for air and his kiss was exactly what I needed to breathe.
When he groaned into my mouth, snaked his hand around my back and pulled me to him, I knew I’d won the battle. Soon it was Seth who kissed me with such heat and passion that my legs nearly buckled. He moved his hand lower, grabbing hold of my ass and dragged me against his rapidly growing erection. I gasped into his mouth
.
“Yes,” I breathed. “That’s it, Seth. Don’t stop.”
He didn’t.
The kiss soon became frenzied. Our teeth clashed and our tongues dueled—our hands seemingly having a mind and will of their own. I grabbed Seth’s tee and pulled it up and out of his jeans, humming with pleasure when my palms came into contact with his velvety smooth skin. It felt amazing to be able to touch him in this way. I’d fantasized about it for so long and now that I was actually able to do, I could hardly believe my luck.
Seth pulled back, breathing raggedly. I was about to protest and beg him to kiss me again, but I didn’t need to. He’d stopped, only long enough to pull the sleep tee I wore up and over my head. I wasn’t wearing anything underneath, but that fact didn’t bother me in the slightest—even though it should have. I’d never been naked in front of anyone before, at least not since I was a little girl and my mom used to bathe me, but I felt comfortable in my nakedness, especially because Seth was looking at me like I was the most beautiful girl in the world. I was so happy that he was finally giving in to his feelings for me.
“You’re so pretty, Mia,” he said, looking me up and down in the dim light cast from my bedside lamp. “So goddamn beautiful you make my chest ache. Every time I look at you I get this pain right here,” he said putting a hand over his heart. “A dull, throbbing ache that comes from wanting something I thought I could never have.”
“You can have me,” I said. “You can have all of me. Any way you want me.”
I took hold of the bottom of his tee and tugged it up. When I got it off him, I tossed it carelessly aside.
He was incredibly good looking, and I could have spent all night drinking him in. However, as I cast an appreciative glance over his tattooed torso, Seth grabbed me roughly then pulled me up against his body once again, his mouth crashing down against mine in an almost punishing kiss. He meant business. I liked this dominant, take charge side of him that he’d never let me see before and went pliant in his arms. The kiss went on and on. Seth tasted of beer and mint and something that was just him. It was intoxicating.