‘True.’ Millie smiled at her. ‘Maybe emotional reliability is what I mean.’
‘I’m not sure he could offer that either. I don’t know. I just felt…’
‘A connection?’
‘Sounds silly, doesn’t it?’
‘Not one bit,’ Millie replied. ‘That’s exactly how I felt about Dylan. I mean, on the face of it he couldn’t have been more unsuitable, but there was something about him I couldn’t put my finger on, and I was drawn to him even though I didn’t know why. I can only describe it as a connection.’
‘So maybe it’s not that mad after all?’
‘I think you might need to keep a clear head about it, but if that’s what you feel you shouldn’t dismiss it out of hand. You got his number last night?’
Darcie shook her head. ‘No. But I gave him mine. I suppose that means I have to wait and see if he calls. At least it saves me making the decision.’
‘There is that. Though it might be a bit of a nail-biting wait.’
The conversation was interrupted by Dylan hurrying into the kitchen, looking worried. Millie read the expression immediately and turned the radio off.
‘What’s the matter?’
‘Spencer’s here. I’d say he needs a stiff drink but judging by his breath he’s already taken care of that. Tori’s left him.’
Millie and Darcie exchanged a look of alarm. Reaching for a cloth to wipe her hands, Millie rushed through to the living room.
‘Sorry…’ Spencer sat in the armchair, looking so deflated that he was in danger of being swallowed up by the cushions.
‘What are you sorry for?’
‘Ruining your Christmas Day, being a complete loser, for ever thinking it was a good idea to come home… Take your pick.’
Millie looked at Dylan. ‘Be a love and get some coffee, would you.’
Dylan fastened Oscar back into his bouncy seat and went off to the kitchen while Millie and Darcie both sat on the sofa across from Spencer.
‘Want to talk about it?’ Millie asked.
‘There’s nothing to talk about. I’m an idiot and she’s gone.’
‘I think that’s a bit harsh,’ Millie said. ‘You’re far from an idiot. The Spencer Johns I know is a smart, caring man who also happens to be a bit of a secret hero. So if she’s gone, then I suspect there’s more to it than that.’
He shook his head. ‘I wish all those things were true, but you’re being too kind.’ He stood up. ‘I don’t know why I’ve come. You’ve got things to do, and I’m ruining your morning with my miserable face.’
Millie leapt up and caught him by the arm. She smiled. ‘Don’t be silly. Your face is a very nice face and I want to help. If you like, we can cook dinner together and you can tell me about it that way. It might help to take your mind off things and make you feel a bit brighter about it all.’
‘How is it that you always know exactly the right thing to say?’ Spencer asked.
‘I don’t know about that. I think Dylan would tell it differently.’
‘Dylan wouldn’t,’ Dylan said, returning with a coffee for Spencer. ‘Dylan thinks Millie is practically perfect in every way – just like Mary Poppins.’
‘I wish,’ said Millie. ‘I could do with some of that finger clicking to tidy up after you from time to time.’ She looked at Spencer. ‘Come on, let’s get dinner on.’
‘Would you mind if I try to call Tori again first?’
Millie nodded. ‘Do whatever it takes.’
Spencer placed his coffee on a small table and stepped into the vast kitchens. He dialled the number, and as he had suspected, the call went straight to voicemail.
‘Tori,’ he began, ‘please talk to me. I want to apologise, and I can’t talk to a machine. So if you’d just call me we can talk and I’ll explain…’ Spencer ended the call and, with a sigh, went back through to the living room.
‘Well?’ Millie asked.
Spencer shrugged. ‘I don’t suppose someone wants to come with me to fetch my car? I kind of left it with some sheep at the side of the road. And as I’ve already downed a couple of brandies, it’ll have to be someone who can drive.’
Dylan looked at Millie, who nodded.
‘Darcie and I can cope here for an hour while you go,’ she said. ‘But don’t even think about calling at the Dog and Hare on the way back.’
Spencer and Dylan stepped out into the crisp white landscape, azure skies stretching above. ‘Nice day for a brisk walk,’ Dylan said.
‘How about a sweaty run?’ Spencer shot him a sideways glance.
‘Shameful,’ Dylan said. Spencer looked at him, but although Dylan wore the ghost of a smile, it wasn’t the usual mocking one he reserved just for his oldest friend. ‘You had it bad for her, didn’t you?’
‘I think she was the one.’
‘It’s too bad, my friend.’
‘Yeah.’
‘She’ll come back. She’s not going to throw away what you had over some stupid stink her parents kicked up.’
‘I don’t think it’s just about that.’
‘What are you going to do?’
Spencer shrugged.
‘We could hit the Dog and Hare tonight? A pint or two of Doug’s finest guest ale might cheer you up.’
‘Tori and I were going to help out on the bar at the Dog and Hare tonight,’ Spencer said. ‘I suppose I might as well still do it. And if a drink slips down at the same time, well, I don’t suppose that will hurt. I could do with blotting out the misery, just for today. Some Christmas Day this is turning out to be.’
‘Tell me about it.’
Spencer turned to him. ‘I thought you and Millie were blissfully happy?’
‘Oh, we are. It’s just, well, you know what she’s like. Always busy fussing over everyone and sometimes she forgets the things closer to home.’
‘Like what?’
Dylan shook his head. ‘It doesn’t matter.’
‘Yes, it does. What’s she forgotten?’
‘Everyone has opened their presents, but she hasn’t opened hers from me.’
Spencer broke into a puzzled smile. ‘That’s it? The big issue?’
‘Now I feel like a tit – thanks for that.’
‘To be honest, mate, you sound like a tit. You’re the luckiest guy on the planet getting that woman to put up with you.’
‘Yeah, I know. And she is amazing. It’s just that I needed her to open her presents because… Forget it.’
They trudged on in silence, the ground heavy going beneath them and their breath curling into the blue skies. Honeybourne was at its most peaceful, the streets bathed in a strange, ethereal calm, the only sounds other than the crunching of their boots on the snow were the faint strains of laughter or music as they passed a dwelling. Then, in the distance, the church bells began to ring out the first service of the day.
As they passed the Dog and Hare, Jenny and Lewis rushed out to them.
‘Where have you been?’ Jenny cried.
‘To the bakery,’ Spencer said, angling his head at Dylan as if it was the most obvious reply in the world. Which, really, it was.
‘We’re not due there for a couple of hours yet,’ she said, ignoring Dylan. ‘Come home and talk to us.’
‘There’s nothing to say, Mum. I don’t blame you and I don’t want you to blame yourself either. I need to sort this mess out and I will, in my own time and in my own way.’
‘Where are you going now then?’ Lewis asked.
‘To get the car I abandoned… remember?’
‘Right. Well, how about we go and get it?’
‘What for?’
‘To help.’
‘Dad, what will that achieve?’ Spencer asked. He wasn’t angry, but he was tired of his parents’ pointless platitudes and gestures. ‘It won’t help me get Tori back and as I have nothing better to do right now, I might as well go and get it. And before you say anything, Dylan is going to drive it back to the bakery.’
‘So you’
re not coming home to open your presents?’
‘I’m not really in the mood.’
Jenny looked at Lewis and her lip trembled.
‘Please, don’t be upset, Mum. I will, but I just can’t face it right now. Surely you can understand that and forgive me this once?’
‘What shall we do?’ she asked in a small voice.
Spencer looked at Dylan. He did feel sorry for his parents, who seemed to realise now the part they had played in the events leading up to today; their guilt was easy to see. He didn’t want to hurt them but he just couldn’t help it.
‘Why don’t you head off to the bakery?’ Dylan suggested. ‘Millie could do with a hand and we’ll be back as soon as we can.’
Lewis nodded and took Jenny’s hand as they headed off in the direction Spencer and Dylan had just come from.
‘Thanks, mate,’ Spencer said.
Dylan gave him a tight smile. ‘It’s what friends are for, isn’t it?’
Darcie listened to the message again with a huge smile.
Hi, Darcie, it’s Tariq. I just wanted to let you know that there is good news and bad news. The bad news is I got some pretty severe punishments for going AWOL. But the good news is that I haven’t been sent to the firing squad so I’m still alive. Seriously, though, it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be and that’s because I came back sharpish. I can’t thank you enough for listening to me last night, it means so much to have a friendly ear. I’m really glad you talked some sense into me and persuaded me to come back, and please thank Dylan for driving me here.
So, you might have guessed that this is my number. I hope you’ll keep it in your phone now and maybe use it to tell me when you’re free for a drink. I promise I won’t hide behind your bins and scare the life out of you next time we meet… and I hope we do.
I’m not really into Christmas, but I know you are, so Merry Christmas.
Tariq.
He wanted to meet her for a drink. She wanted to send him a text, but she didn’t have a clue what to say. She began one, but then deleted it. Then she began another before deleting that too. Nothing sounded right. Maybe she needed to wait until she’d thought about it. But she couldn’t wait because he might take that as a sign she wasn’t interested. But then if she replied straight away, wouldn’t that make her seem desperate and needy? Maybe she’d go and ask Millie. But that was ridiculous – she was twenty-two, after all, and if she couldn’t reply to a simple text by now it was time to give up. Not only that, but she had texts on her phone from Nathan, who still seemed very keen, though she tried not to think about those as the little worm of guilt worked into her thoughts. She would need to make some decisions, but maybe today wasn’t the day to do that.
She looked up as Millie came into the kitchen with Oscar in her arms.
‘He would wake up now, just when we don’t have Dylan around…’ Millie gave a vague smile as she glanced at the phone still clutched in Darcie’s hand. ‘What are you looking so pleased about? You look like someone’s just given you an extra big bit of Christmas pudding.’
‘I wouldn’t look like this,’ Darcie grinned. ‘I don’t like Christmas pudding.’
Millie frowned. ‘Yes, you do – you’ve always eaten it.’
‘Only at Christmas, because you’re supposed to, and only when you cooked Christmas dinner for me because I felt guilty that you’d made it and I was so happy that you’d cooked for me when my parents were being useless and I wanted to get out of the house. I hate it really.’
‘So all those times you had dinner with me…’
Darcie shrugged and offered an apologetic smile. ‘Sorry.’
Millie shook her head. ‘That’s mental. So what’s the thing that has you so chipper?’
‘I can be happy for no reason, can’t I?’
‘Ok, don’t tell me then.’
‘Tariq left me a message!’ Darcie blurted out, beaming.
‘I knew he would.’
‘Really?’
‘It was pretty obvious that he liked you,’ Millie laughed.
‘Not to me.’
‘That’s the frustrating thing about these situations – the person who is the object of the other person’s affections is usually the last to work it out, and it’s hard to give encouragement when you’re clueless.’
‘What do you think?’ Darcie asked.
‘About what?’
‘Do you think he’s worth a shot? Do you think he seems ok?’
‘I’m not sure I’m qualified to comment. What’s your gut feeling?’
‘I like him.’ Darcie was thoughtful for a moment. She did like him – a lot. And now that she had said it out loud she realised just how much, and how right he seemed already. She also realised another strange thing – she hadn’t thought about Dylan in that way since Tariq had appeared the night before. Maybe he was more right for her than she had even realised.
‘Then go for it. You get one life, so go out, take chances, make mistakes, fall in love, get your heart broken and then fall in love all over again. There’s no point in half measures, and I can say that with a great deal of authority.’
Darcie grinned. ‘Do you think I should call him?’
‘Right now? Maybe better to text. He might be doing press-ups in the training ground with some big grumpy general’s boot on his back. Probably best to arrange a time to phone, or let him know that he can call you when it’s a good time.’
‘Of course,’ Darcie said. ‘I never thought of all that. It must be stifling sometimes to be in the army, with all those rules and restrictions. No wonder he felt like running away.’
‘It’s certainly not a life I’d fancy,’ Millie agreed. ‘But he signed up so rules and restrictions are what he’s got. I would hope there’s some support there for him so there are no repeats of last night.’
They were interrupted by a knock at the front door booming through the house. Millie looked at the clock.
‘If that’s guests they’re a bit early. Or maybe Dylan’s left his key behind again.’
‘I’ll get it,’ Darcie said, racing for the door and feeling giddier than she had done in a very long time.
Today felt like the Christmases of old, when she was a kid and the world was still a wondrous and shiny place. It was nice to have that feeling back.
But then she opened the door to a very sober looking Jenny and Lewis, and she was reminded that not everyone was having the Christmas Day they’d been hoping for.
Millie and Dylan had utilised the bakery café, pulling together the tables to create one huge place to eat. With Darcie’s help they had decorated it with gold place settings, tiny stars sprinkled over the pure white cloth and a centrepiece arrangement of holly and deep red roses. The whole effect was simple but stunning, and Darcie had almost been sorry to ruin it with the cheap crackers she had bought in Salisbury, which she deposited next to each set of cutlery. Seated around the table were Jasmine, Rich, the triplets, Jenny, Lewis, Spencer, Ruth Evans and Darcie herself. Millie and Dylan were up and down from their chairs as they remembered things to bring in, or as the various courses became ready, or simply to fetch more wine, while baby Oscar slept in his cot close by. Nobody spoke of the three empty places. Spencer had taken Millie to one side and asked her to leave them set, just in case (although it seemed a forlorn hope) and Millie had quietly agreed.
Despite the obvious strain on certain members of the party, the atmosphere was jovial and good-natured, and people seemed to be doing their best to put differences and heartbreak aside so as not to ruin the day for Millie, who had gone to so much trouble to arrange it. Ruth was already on her way to being cheerfully drunk and was telling the table in a rather loud voice about a particularly vicious water infection she’d just got rid of, while Jenny and Lewis, although doing their best, were notable in that they barely drank at all, especially compared to their usual amount at such a gathering. Spencer was quiet, which was to be expected, but he smiled in all the right places, even if Darc
ie could see it was a smile of someone who was dying inside, and he nodded and answered questions when they were asked. Darcie couldn’t help noticing that he ate very little, even though he made a fuss of each course and told Millie that it was wonderful, and his wine glass seemed to be emptying as fast as it was filled. Darcie wished she could take him to one side and hug him. Though she barely knew him, Millie had told her so many things about the sort of man he was and Darcie couldn’t bear to see him hurting so obviously.
Jasmine and Rich seemed to be getting along. Although the triplets took a great deal of their attention, the frosty atmosphere that had been palpable between them was gone, and they laughed together, even snatching the odd kiss between courses.
Darcie herself kept her phone close. She was not one for using it at the dinner table usually, but she had finally sent Tariq a message and had been hoping for an instant reply, only to get a Christmas message from Nathan instead. It had been quite sweet, but it filled her with guilt. She had sent a brief message back to wish him a Merry Christmas too, and realised she would have to deal with the break-up as soon as she could. It wasn’t fair to string him along like this, but it seemed even less fair to dump him today of all days. In many ways she was annoyed at herself for letting this happen – she should have known from the start that Nathan wasn’t right for her and had the courage to hold out until the right man came into her life. But as she looked across at Dylan, whose sulk over Millie not opening his Christmas presents had obviously been forgotten, she understood why she had done that. It was strange how that longing for him had turned into a gentle, platonic fondness so quickly, but she was more relieved than she could say to have the pain finally lifted from her.
The last thing Spencer wanted to do was eat, drink and be merry. But although his heart was in a million pieces, he forced himself to look as happy as he could manage. He was sure he wasn’t fooling anyone, but his parents felt guilty enough about the way things had turned out with Tori, and Spencer looking like a man who was just waiting for the next bridge to jump off was not going to make them feel any better. His Christmas had been a disaster, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t salvage theirs.
Christmas at the Little Village Bakery Page 26
