Ashes to Ashes

by Rebecca Norinne

  His hand dipped lower, and his long, middle finger dipped into my slick entrance to gather moisture, before sliding back to my puckered hole. Lost to the pleasure of his touch, I didn’t hear him speak. Grabbing a handful of my hair with his free hand, Ash tugged hard, calling my attention back to him.

  “Did you let him in here?” he asked, his voice resentful. He pressed more insistently against my hole with the pad of his finger, massaged me with gentle yet unrelenting strokes until I felt myself loosen and unfurl. “Did his dick ever fuck your perfect ass?”

  I didn’t like talking about my relationship with Ford, especially not when I was with someone else—someone I loved infinitely more than I’d ever loved my ex-husband. But I understood why he needed me to answer, too. Ash had spent the morning listening to how that man had nearly destroyed me. He’d sat there helpless as the woman he loved re-lived her worst memories. It couldn’t have been easy to hear any of it. To sit by while I reminisced about another man, even under the auspices of my career, would have been torture for him. As an alpha, he was doing what he needed to regain control—he was claiming me all over again, in a way Ford never had. Touching a part of me no other man had been.

  Ash was marking his territory, and I loved it.

  I licked my lips, and panted like a bitch in heat when his finger slipped past my barrier and sank knuckle deep. Holy shit. Instinctively, I pushed back against him and mewled for more. “No,” I breathed through the pinch and the burn. “He never touched me there. No one but you Ash. This is only for you.” I rocked my hips over his straining shaft. The fullness from the small intrusion of his finger was exquisite, the friction of his skin against those untrained nerve endings sending shockwaves up my spine to the base of my skull.

  I wanted more. Needed more.

  I needed all of him.

  Not only for the pleasure it would bring me, but for ownership it would give Ash over me. And yes, I knew that made me sound like a bad feminist, but since he already owned my heart and my soul, what was one more piece of my body? It was all his anyway—he’d ruined me for every other man. He owned me—he owned my pleasure—and I didn’t care who knew it.

  “Claim me. Make me yours.”

  He growled and captured my mouth in a rough, authoritative kiss. Our teeth gnashed together and with the next swipe of his tongue, I tasted the metallic taste of blood. I didn’t care. I’d bleed for this man any day of the week. When he stood, I hooked my legs around his waist and locked my arms around his neck. He squeezed my ass and smacked it, then rubbed away the sting. “I’d love nothing more than to fold you over that table and take you hard and fast—” he sank his teeth into my collarbone, sucked my flesh into his mouth “—but not this first time.”

  Ash fumbled for the door handle, while I licked my way over his exposed throat. He finally got it open and carried me across the courtyard and into the house and up to the master bedroom.

  Setting me on the edge of the bed, he dropped into a crouch and rested his palms on my knees. His eyes searched mine. “Is this what you really want, or are you doing it to assuage my ego? Because if you are …”

  “No, Ash. I want this. I want you,” I rushed to tell him, reaching out and running my hand over his beard and then skating my fingers down his neck to rest on his shoulder. “I want you to have all of me.”

  He hesitated for a split second, but then nodded. His eyes sparking with desire, Ash dropped a quick kiss on my forehead. Marching backward until he reached the leather wingback chair in the corner of the room, he dropped into it. With his elbow resting on the arm, he brought his hand to his mouth and swiped his fingers back and forth over his lips, his eyes devouring me from across the room.

  “Strip for me,” he commanded in a low, seductive purr.

  As if there were invisible strings tethering me to him, I stood and shimmied my skirt over my hips until it fell in a whoosh at my feet. Hitching my fingers in the cotton of my panties and slid them to land atop my skirt. Stepping out of the puddled fabric, I took a few steps toward Ash and then pulled my shirt over my head. When only my bra was left, I reached around and unclasped it. With the inside of my arms holding the flimsy lace tight against my body, I fingered the strap until it skated down my shoulder. With Ash’s eyes trained on my hands, I traced my fingers over my collarbone, and then pushed the other strap down. When I dropped my arms, the lace fluttered to the ground in front of me

  When I was standing in front of him wearing nothing but a blush, Ash licked his lips and leaned forward. “You’re exquisite,” he growled. “And you’re all mine.”

  “I am,” I agreed, taking another bold step forward. “Just like you’re mine.”

  His turbulent gray eyes roamed my body, and then his lips hitched up in a smirk of pure masculine satisfaction. “That I am,” he conceded, pushing off his chair to stand in front of me.

  His fingers danced over my shoulders and down the length of my arms until Ash linked our hands together. Raising one hand to his mouth, he placed a tender kiss along my knuckles, and then repeated the gesture with the other hand, his eyes trained on mine.

  “So you know, I’ve only done this one other time, but the situation was much different. It was …” He blinked and pushed whatever he’d been about to say away. “ It doesn’t matter. What matters is this. Us. I want to savor the experience. Make it good for you.”

  I didn’t know what I’d expected, but it wasn’t this. I’d braced myself for rough, dirty talk, for Ash to fuck me hard and mercilessly. When Ash unleashed his dominant side, he took me right up to the edge of what I could physically endure, pushed my boundaries and capacity for both pleasure and pain. The type of journey we were about to embark on could hurt me, especially the first time. And with Ash exorcising his jealousy through fucking, I’d fully anticipated there’d be a lot of pain. Anticipated it and accepted it.

  I hadn’t expected him to be tender though.

  “Your face gives away your every thought,” he whispered. “I know what you thought was going to happen right now, and it humbles me all the more that you still put your trust in me.” His face dropped forward and he took my lips in a reverent kiss as his hands roamed my back and pulled me closer. With his hard cock resting against my belly, Ash took one last pull on my mouth. “This isn’t about my need for control. Don’t get me wrong, I need to make you mine, in every way possible, but that doesn’t have to mean pain. I can claim you here and here—” he tapped my temple and palmed my heart “—with gentleness too.”

  My eyes welled with tears that hovered, held, and then broke free, cascading down my face in silent wonderment.

  “I want to make love to you, Rae,” he continued, adorning my exposed neck, chest, and breasts with worshipful kisses and licks. “I want to sink so deep inside of you, that I drown in your love. Will you let me do that baby?”

  With shaky legs and a quaking heart, I nodded my assent. I understood what he meant because it was exactly the same for me. I wanted him to succumb to his fire until I was scorched and reborn, like a phoenix rising from the ashes.

  He took my mouth then in the type of stormy kiss I’d come to associate with our lovemaking, the kind that made my stomach flutter with desire and my heart race with longing. Wrapping my leg around his waist, I rolled my hips in an attempt to get closer to him. I needed him against every molecule of my skin.

  As we kissed, Ash walked us toward the bed until the mattress hit the back of my thighs. Pushing me onto the flat of my back, his fingers found their way to my pussy, already drenched for him.

  “I love how wet you get for me,” he said, taking my nipple in his teeth and stretching it taut. Sliding a finger between my folds, he ground the heel of his palm against my mound. “That’s it baby, fuck my hand.” Ash added a second finger and I bucked against him, chasing my release. The closer I got, the faster he moved until the wet sounds of my pussy were nearly as loud as my moans.

  Sliding down my body, Ash sucked my clit into his mouth, a
nd I soared.

  “Scoot up the bed and roll onto your stomach.”

  With my elbows braced against the covers, I dragged my body to the top of the bed and flipped over, letting my eyes fall closed and my arms rest next to me. With my eyes shut, my other senses kicked in to overdrive. I listened as the metal of Ash’s belt buckle clanked and then I heard the faint whoosh of his jeans dropping to the floor. At my feet, the mattress dipped and a naked Ash straddled my thighs. The snap of a plastic bottle cap being opened and then shut echoed in the silence, only to be filled by the slippery sound of him rubbing his palms together.

  When Ash brought his hands to my waist, he smoothed them up and over my back, digging his fingers into me. With slick hands, he focused on my neck and shoulders—the places where I carried my worries. With strong, assured strokes, he moved lower, caressing the full roundness of each globe of my ass. After another snap of the lid, I felt the liquid pool near the base of my spine and then trail into my crevice in warm rivulets. Working the oil into my skin, Ash’s hands made wide, arcing sweeps of my muscles before curving closer and closer to that forbidden place.

  When a thumb passed over my bud, I clenched against its presence. “Relax, baby,” he whispered.

  As he nibbled his way across my flesh, I took a deep breath and willed my muscles to unclench. I want this, I reminded myself. Whatever he did to me, I’d asked for. Hell, I’d begged for it.

  With feather light strokes, he swept the pad of his finger over and around that highly sensitive place. Again, and again, and again until I felt myself opening to him. “Yeah, baby. Just like that. So fucking responsive,” he whispered before kissing the back of my thigh.

  Ash petted and played with me until I lost track of time, until I squirmed under his questing fingers, until my hips rolled against the mattress beneath me.

  “More?”

  I moaned, a deep guttural sound. “More.”

  Adding more oil, Ash worked his finger past my barrier and then out again. Over and over, he advanced bit by tiny bit, until I’d taken the entire thing. Until I was pushing back against it, until I was shaking with need.

  “How does that feel?”

  “Good,” I answered. “So, so good.”

  With his finger moving in and out of me with languid, measured strokes he asked, “Can you come from just this?”

  I took stock of my body and decided that while what he was doing felt fantastic, it wasn’t enough to tip me over the edge.

  “No,” I admitted.

  “Keep going?”

  I nodded. “Please,” I croaked.

  Carefully and with great care, Ash pressed a second finger to my opening and slid both in. “Holy fuck, you’re tight.”

  “Oh god,” I moaned. “So good.” When I rolled my hips to increase the sensation, I sucked in a startled gasp.

  “Still good?” he asked, moving his fingers.

  “So fucking good,” I told him, pushing my ass in the air. “I want your cock in me. Now.”

  Ash’s fingers stilled and then slipped from my rear. “Like this?” he asked, rubbing the globes of my ass appreciatively. “Your call, Rae. You’re in control.”

  “Yes, just like this,” I answered, desperate for him to ease my empty ache, to fill me completely.

  I glanced over my shoulder and watched Ash fisting his cock, the lube glistening down his shaft. I dropped down onto my forearms and waited for him to press against my slick entrance. Gripping my hip, he rubbed the head of his cock over my bud, again and again, loosening the muscles there.

  “Okay?”

  I nodded and whimpered.

  “Give me your words Rae.”

  “Yes, please,” I begged on a ragged side.

  Pressing his cock harder against my tight center, my body fought against the intrusion. “Relax,” he said, rubbing my flank. “Just relax.”

  I took a deep breath and let it out slowly. At the same time, Ash applied more pressure and slipped past my defenses. The shock of his cock breaching me, stretching me, was more startling than the slight twinge of pain that accompanied it. I winced and forced myself to relax my muscles while he held still and waited for me to acclimate to his presence.

  “You still with me?”

  “Yes,” I answered, pushing back against him, welcoming him further into me. “Just go slow. Be gentle.”

  “This is all you,” he bit out, his control held tight. “You move when you’re ready.”

  After a few seconds, the discomfort receded and in its place existed a strange sort of fullness that was neither pain, nor pleasure. A feeling so foreign as to be indescribable. All I knew was that I wanted more of it. “Okay, I’m good. You can move.”

  “You sure?”

  “Yes, please. Now. Fuck me, Ash.”

  I couldn’t explain it, but it was imperative to me that now that I’d grown used to the feel of him inside of my ass, Ash take control. To fully give myself over to him, I needed him to take what he wanted—what he needed—from my body.

  Ash gripped my hips, his strong fingers digging into my skin. He pulled back and then slid forward in one slow, measured glide. “Oh fuck, you feel so good.”

  “You too,” I encouraged, propping back up on my hands and knees. “More.”

  “I don’t want to hurt you.”

  “You’re not going to hurt me,” I promised. “Besides, I want the burn. Tomorrow, I want to know you’ve been here. I want to feel you deep inside of me when I’m sitting in the studio, singing about another man. I want to ache with the memory of you.”

  Apparently, that’s what Ash wanted too because he reared back and slammed into me, the force of his driving thrust nearly knocking me onto my stomach. And yes, there was pain, but it was the good sort of pain, the kind that reminded you that you were alive and you could feel, and that despite everything that had been thrown at you, you were stronger, more resilient than you’d ever been. The kind of ache that assured Ash that he owned a part of me no one else ever would. That I trusted him with my heart and my body, and that I’d willingly handed over my soul. A tenderness so exquisite that it brought literal tears to my eyes as he pounded into again and again.

  “Touch yourself,” he said through ragged breaths.

  Slipping my fingers between my wet folds, I rubbed them over the tight nub of my clit and felt a tingling warmth begin to take root deep in the pit of my belly before it cascaded outward in a rush. I rubbed faster and harder as behind me, Ash’s breathing turned erratic and the pace of his trusts increased.

  With a guttural moan, he pulled out and shouted my name. In the next instant, I felt the hot brand of his cum shooting all over my back and my ass.

  The sound of his triumph tipped me over the edge, and with the next pass of my fingers, my pussy clenched and my own orgasm followed. With a keening cry, I was pulled under and robbed of breath.

  I collapsed and Ash followed me into oblivion.

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Rae

  The room was quiet, the only noise the crickets singing their songs outside the bedroom window. I was curled up against Ash while he absentmindedly twined a strand of my damp hair around his fingers, and I traced random patterns over his chest.

  “Are you okay?” he asked for what was quite possibly the hundredth time.

  “Yes,” I said, dropping a kiss to his chest. “I’m better than okay. I’m perfect.”

  “I wasn’t too rough with you?”

  I laughed. “This coming from a man who likes to tie me up and spank me until I can’t sit down the next day.”

  “I know,” he admitted sheepishly. “But I could have really hurt you.”

  “You could always hurt me with the other stuff too.”

  “No,” he growled. “That’s all about control. This was—”

  But Ash’s statement was cut off by the sound of Blanche’s angry bark shattering the silent night.

  The hair on the back of my neck stood on end, and my heart thumped with a
rush of adrenaline.

  In the blink of an eye, Ash jumped out of bed and pulled on his jeans. “Stay there,” he barked, tugging open a drawer and pulling out a handgun.

  I hopped out of bed and started throwing on whatever clothes I could find. Standing in the middle of the room clad only in my underwear and the t-shirt Ash had been wearing earlier, I watched, wide-eyed, as he checked the gun’s magazine, slid it in place, and flicked the safety.

  Passing me the weapon, I cradled it in my shaking hands and stared down at it in horror. It’d been twenty years since I’d last fired a gun, and that had been an old .22 my uncle used to shoot cans with out in the desert. I’d always meant to learn how to properly handle one, but there’d never seemed a reason to.

  Until now.

  I jumped when Blanche barked again, angrier and more aggressive sounding. Immediately afterward came the sound of shattering glass and a thud. Dorothy’s whimpers filled the silence, and my eyes brimmed with tears, knowing those two beautiful pups were downstairs trying to protect us from whatever was coming for me.

  From the man who wanted me dead.

  Ash stood in front of me, his hands gripping my biceps tight. Crowding my vision, he said, “I’m going out there. I want you to lock yourself in the bathroom. If anyone comes through that door who isn’t me, shoot the mother fucker square in the chest. Do you understand?”

  This can’t be happening.

  I thought we were safe out here. How’d he find us? And where were the rest of Ash’s men, the ones who were supposed to be patrolling the property’s perimeter? All these and a million other questions flashed through my mind. I couldn’t speak; I didn’t know what to say.