"God, Parker, I was so scared." Mare folded herself into his hug. "I thought we were going to lose her."
"Why, what happened?"
Mare sat on one of the olive green chairs and propped her forehead on her hand. "When I got on the phone, she told me she was bleeding. She wasn't crying and didn't even sound scared, but her voice came from so far away I knew she was in shock. I called an ambulance and met it at the house."
Biff and Fawn had a house in Boston as well as the one on the Cape.
"There was blood everywhere. She said she hadn't had any cramping, but later the EMT told me she'd admitted to having some cramps that she thought were ligaments stretching."
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Details Parker didn't understand and wasn't sure he wanted to. "So did she lose the baby?"
Tears welled in Mare's eyes and she covered her mouth with her hand. She nodded and Parker's heart fell. He held his sister while she sobbed and wondered at his reaction. He hadn't thought much about the baby at all, and when he did it was with anger and pity. But somewhere along the line he must have started to look forward to it. Another little brother or sister. A baby in the family again. Fawn's precious child, that she'd wanted so much.
His throat burned when he thought of what she must be going through.
"How is she?" he asked when Mare had calmed down again.
"She's fine. They did a D&C and are keeping her overnight because of the volume of blood she lost. Dad's with her now."
"Can we go see her?"
Mare nodded and stood. "I was just waiting for you."
She led him to the end of the hall, to a private room outfitted to look like a bedroom. But the IV strapped to Fawn's arm and the steady beep of the monitor clipped to her finger ruined the effect.
She looked so young. She sat up in bed, her hair looking stringy and dull, her face gray and drawn. Her eyes drowned in sadness and something more.
Then he saw his father's face, and he knew what the something more was.
"What did you say to her?" he demanded before he could stop himself. Mare gasped.
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Fawn's expression didn't change. "Don't, Parker, it's okay,"
she said.
"Like hell it is." He stood in front of his father and dared the man to act on his panic.
Oh, yes, it was panic. Parker had felt it enough in the past weeks to recognize it in Biff. In that moment, he had a greater understanding of his father than he'd ever expected to have. Sophie had been right. Biff acted not out of carelessness for others, but of fear for himself.
It didn't matter. The end result was the same. He'd broken hearts, torn people apart with his actions. Who cared what caused them?
Parker wasn't going to let it happen again.
"What ... did ... you ... say ... to ... her?" He could barely force the words out through his teeth. His fists wouldn't release.
Biff stood and tried to look defiant. "That's between me and my wife," he said. Parker looked at Fawn. Her resistance was obviously low, because she told him instead of telling him to back off.
"He wants a divorce."
Parker could only stare at her. Even at his worst, Biff had never sunk so low.
"You'd do that to her, now?"
"I don't have to answer to you." Hiding his emotion under gruffness. It was an old tactic, and Parker couldn't believe he'd never seen through it before.
"No, it's too late for that," he said. "But I can't believe you'd be so cruel."
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Biff glanced at his wife. His normally ruddy face paled, and Parker could have sworn he saw raw longing before he hid it under contempt.
"Fawn and I have discussed it. There's nothing more to be said, especially to you." He strode out of the room. Parker moved to the doorway and watched his old man walk down the hall. Old man was an apt term. Biff obviously hadn't expected to be followed, because he walked with bent head and slumped shoulders and when he reached the elevator, Parker saw those shoulders shake.
He almost went after him, but turned back. Fawn needed him more. Needed all of them.
"I'm so sorry." He sat on the edge of the bed and took her hand in his. Mare sat on the other side and brushed Fawn's hair off her forehead when the younger woman slumped against her pillows.
"I should have expected it," she said. A single tear trickled down her cheek and she watched the door as if Biff would come back through it. "He's been making comments about the baby, about how things will change ... would change after it was born. And not, of course, in a good way."
"Fawn." He didn't know what to say. He couldn't tell her that he'd warned her, though he had. He couldn't chide her for expecting the old dog to change when he'd been the same bastard for fifty-five years.
He couldn't say she was better off. Not when her hand still rested on her belly, just as it had at that long-ago dinner in the French restaurant.
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Fawn pulled her other hand from his and wiped her cheeks. "You know, things have been different, Parker. He hasn't cheated on me. Not once," she responded to his unbelieving stare. "I'd know. I knew before."
"He'd hide it," Mare said softly. She still stroked Fawn's hair, like a child's. "If he wasn't trying to punish you for something, he'd hide it."
"I'd still know." She reached for a tissue and wiped her nose. Gone was the society woman she'd been trained to be.
Now she was just a woman who'd suffered tragedy and betrayal from the person she loved. "He was happy about the baby at first. We outfitted the nursery and he came to my doctor's appointments." Her eyes welled again. "You should have seen his face at the ultrasound. He cared. He wanted to do things differently." She firmed her voice and thumped a fist on the bed. "He got scared, the jerk. He was afraid of what opening up meant, and this miscarriage just confirmed it for him. Now he's lashing out again, making the pre-emptive strike. I won't let him."
She looked like she was about to climb out of the bed and storm after him right there. Parker laid a hand on her thigh to settle her.
"Fawn, he's a bastard. He doesn't deserve you. And you deserve much better than him."
Fawn studied him, then looked at Mare. "You never told him, did you?"
Mare shrugged. "It was none of his business."
Fawn snorted. "It was none of yours, either, but you didn't let that stop you." She turned back to Parker and suddenly 245
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she wasn't the slightly dim, sweet little trophy wife he'd always seen. She looked harder, tougher, more like the streets.
"I was a prostitute, Parker. Your father met me in a bar and paid me for sex he never got. You saw Pretty Woman?"
He nodded vaguely, too stunned to really consider the question.
"I lived it. He took me to his penthouse and fed me and clothed me. He played backgammon and Trivial Pursuit with me, and when I won he proposed.
"I wasn't fool enough to turn him down. I was fool enough to fall in love with him. We both got what we deserved. The difference is, I know it, and he doesn't. But I'll teach him."
"How?"
"He's not getting his divorce. You can count on that. I've learned a few more things since that quickie wedding."
Suddenly looking exhausted, she fell back against the pillows again. "I can survive anything," she whispered. "Even this."
She brushed her fingertips over her abdomen. "Even him. But I'll never stop fighting."
Looking exhausted, she pressed kisses to her fingertips, then her fingers to Mare's and Parker's cheeks. "You two are wonderful kids. Biff knows that. Someday you'll know it, too."
She closed her eyes and began to drift off to sleep.
Parker straightened he
r bedclothes and followed Mare out into the hall. He scrubbed his hands over his face and stared at his sister.
"Wow."
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"Well, you always had such a high opinion of her, I didn't want to disillusion you."
"Yeah, right." He started walking down the hall. "How'd you find out?"
"I hired a detective."
Smart. Smarter than Parker had been. But then, he hadn't cared if the woman his father had married was out to swindle him. Parker would have considered it justice.
Still concerned, he glanced back down the hall. "Are you sure she's okay? She fell asleep awfully fast."
"She was given a sedative. It works quickly." Mare looped her arm through Parker's and started leading him down the hall. "I have to get home. The boys will be there soon. More bad news to tell them." She looked worn out.
"Do you want me to come?"
She shook her head. "Go to Sophie. You need her, and I'm fine on my own."
He didn't believe that, but let it go. He was swimming in contradictory thoughts and needed some time alone to figure things out. He walked Mare to her car, then drove to the office.
Betty stood when he walked in. "Parker, my God, you look like death. What happened?"
He told her about Fawn's miscarriage and watched her face crumple into pity.
"I'll order flowers," she said. "What's her room number?"
"I don't remember." He told her the hospital and drifted into his office. He felt distant from everything, numb, and knew it wouldn't last. Eventually the anger and sorrow and 247
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fear would come back and he'd have to deal with them.
Especially the fear. He needed to be prepared when they did.
His intercom buzzed. "Parker, Sophie's on line one."
"Tell her I'll call her back later, please."
After a pause, Betty said, "All right." Parker got up and locked the door. He didn't need his secretary's well-meaning meddling.
He cleared his desk of busywork, letting his mind worry over things in the background. He organized the more in-depth tasks for the next day—or next week—and put away all the loose pens and clips. Then he swiveled his chair to watch twilight settle over the city.
He didn't believe in signs. He didn't find symbolism in everything that happened to him. Fate didn't control his life, and synchronicity was a fancy word for coincidence. But if he didn't think all that, he would believe Life was trying to tell him something.
Sophie's family was complex and diverse, with consequent personality clashes. But they were functional. They loved each other, respected each other, protected each other.
Supported each other. None of them would deliberately hurt another for their own needs. None of them would require counseling to get over the blows dealt to them in childhood.
Contrast the dinner the other night to the scenes in the hospital. Everything Biff the Senior had ever done in his life had culminated in that moment when he'd tried to destroy the woman he loved to protect himself.
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would be. Abusers were usually abused. Dysfunction bred dysfunction.
He couldn't force Sophie into that. He'd let things go too far, and now she'd be hurt. But the pain she felt now would be nothing compared to what she'd face if he married her.
The intercom buzzed again.
"Charles Whitmer, line two."
Parker glanced at his watch. It was after five. Betty should have gone home, and Chuck shouldn't expect to reach him here. He was usually still on the radio.
"Hey, Biff! How's it going?"
Parker rolled his eyes. He'd gotten used to being called
"Parker." He'd have to work harder to eliminate "Biff" from his life.
"Chuck. What can I do for you?"
"You sound busy. I'll get right to the point. MMT is having a fundraiser for autism next week. We sent you an invitation but haven't gotten a response."
Parker glanced at his "non-urgent" pile. The invitation was probably in there. He got so many, he had to pick and choose what he went to, and got tired of the process.
"Sorry. I've been focused on other things."
"Understandable. I just wondered if you'd be able to attend. It's not too late to R.S.V.P."
Parker leaned back in his chair. "How come you're calling me? Don't you have a fundraiser chairperson?"
"Oh, yeah, but she sure ain't Sophie," Chuck grumbled.
"Not as much charm. And she doesn't have a handle on who's important."
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"I qualify?" Parker didn't feel important.
"Without a doubt. But your importance is more than the money you can bring. When you're at an event, others attending give more."
That was news to him. "Says who?"
Chuck cleared his throat. "Well, Sophie did a study last year. Not very scientific, but fundraisers you attended raised more on average per attendee than those you skipped."
"Why?"
"Hell, I don't know. I guess people think you're more moral and giving than they are, and they feel guilty. It works on me," he grumbled.
Parker began to dig through the pile. "When is it again?"
Chuck gave him the date, and he checked his calendar. "I'll be late, but I can be there."
"Bring Sophie, will ya? We miss her."
So do I, Parker thought, and wondered how he'd survive a lifetime without her when he could barely survive an afternoon. "I'll try. Hey, one question."
"Yeah."
"Why autism? It's not your usual philanthropy."
Chuck coughed, but when he spoke his voice was still raspy. "Dave's son was just diagnosed."
"Oh, man, I'm sorry."
"So are we." After a pause, Chuck thanked him and hung up. As soon as the indicator light on the phone blinked off, the office door opened.
"Can I go home, now?"
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Parker frowned at Betty. "What are you asking me for? It's past quitting time. You can go whenever you want."
"I wanted to make sure you were okay."
"Fine. Hunky dory. Go."
"Oh-kay." Betty started to close the door.
"Wait!"
She pushed it back open and sighed with exasperation.
"What?"
"What do you know about Chuck Whitmer?"
She shrugged. "Owner of MMT, a highly stable tech company. Good businessman, fairly decent guy, according to the gossip. Dates a lot, but isn't considered a womanizer.
Hard worker. Potential family man, though he hasn't been close to caught. Lots of women are waiting for him to get serious before they move in. Most think he's got a thing for someone else, though."
Parker shook his head. "Where do you get this stuff?"
"Professional Secretaries International. Why do you want to know?"
"Just curious."
Betty tilted her head. "You know, a few years ago, there was talk that he and Sophie had a thing going. Some speculate that he's hung up on her."
Perfect. Well, except for the needles in his heart. They'd started their pricking again. Still, he felt compelled to defend Sophie.
"Sophie said the rumors weren't true."
"Yeah, most of us figured that." She waited, but he didn't say any more. "Good night, Parker."
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"Night, Betty."
The silence of an empty building filtered through Parker's open office door. He grabbed his briefcase and keys and locked up, feeling like he at least had a plan. Even a plan that would
kill him.
He felt more like his father than ever.
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CHAPTER 16
Sophie didn't know what had happened. Parker had said he'd enjoyed the dinner at her family's. He'd gotten along with everyone, and after the initial outrageousness, her parents had decided they'd liked him and welcomed him into the group. Parker had fit right in. He'd taken her to his home and held her all night, and had spoken in terms of a serious relationship with grounds beyond the radio show.
For three days she lived in bliss. She spent every night with Parker, at her condo or at his, taking Hippo with her so he wouldn't leave a disaster like he had the first night, when she'd forgotten all about him in the joy of being invited into Parker's privacy.
They breakfasted together, kissed as he went off to work, and met again at the station to broadcast their best three shows ever. The advertisers were ecstatic, and they had personal appearances scheduled into November.
Then Fawn had her miscarriage. Sophie didn't know what happened at the hospital, but Parker never returned her call.
He was "unavailable" all the next day and showed up at the station just in time for the show. Sensing his mood, she changed the topic from relationships to kids and carried the show herself. He avoided her at the first three breaks. At the midpoint their commercials lasted eight minutes. She cornered him outside the men's room.
"What's wrong?" she demanded.
The look of contempt in his eyes made her gasp.
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"My stepmother had a miscarriage yesterday, in case you didn't know."
Defensive anger rose. "I wouldn't know, if Mare hadn't called me. She seemed to think you'd be with me last night."
Now she saw pain behind the contempt, and softened. "Hon, talk to me. Why is this upsetting you so much? Mare said Fawn's going to be okay."
" Fawn is."
"But.... "Sophie caught sight of Melina's two-minute signal.
"Come home with me after the show. We'll talk."
"I can't. I had to reschedule all my appointments from yesterday." He walked back to the studio, leaving Sophie staring after him. Rejection had never been so ... weird before.
"Welcome back to Rant and Rave, the show that lets you get it off your chest." Sophie tried to inject a little more enthusiasm into her voice. "Today's topic is kids, and we had plenty of ranting about them in the first half of the show. Now let's hear some raving. Remember, no complaints from now until seven o'clock. Tell us what's great about kids."
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