Riven (The Illumine Series)

by Anders, Alivia

  “That’s what I thought,” Lucretia cut through my thoughts, a knowing smile firmly in place. Her eyes glowed with satisfaction. “What you fail to see, Essallie, is that I have been doing you a favor by keeping you here. The world wants you dead, irradiated, gone. Even if you had managed to free yourself from the castle, how long would it be until you would be hunted by another?”

  A sinking feeling in my gut brought me narrowly close to vomiting on the floor. She was right, as much as it pained me to admit it; who was to say I wouldn’t be hunted by someone or something else? If the Vens didn’t get me, what would? Another demon, one with ties to Kayden? A vampire, a witch, the list of enemies were endless.

  This was it, this was my end. The room was surrounded from head to toe, Vens clustering in all four corners, elbowing another to gain a front row seat to the eventual fight. Whispers among them told me they didn’t expect me to live for long, five, maybe ten minutes at the most with help from my co-conspirators. Not that either of them would be of much help; I was standing next to a drug-intoxicated demon desperate for more of my blood, and a Nephilim who probably wished he had left me behind to rot and die. Even if by some miracle we took out every single Vens in the room, I stood no chance against Lucretia. Not here, not like this.

  “Essallie.”

  I froze, my breath catching in my throat. Kayden was whispering in my ear, his words an urgent crash of the tone and accent I knew to be his. For a moment, he was out of his haze, clinging to reality. I briefly wondered how hard he was fighting his instinct to draw every inch of my life force in him, to kill him like had so many others.

  “She’s going to attack,” he whispered, his breath hot on my ear, the smell of blood tingling my nose. Panic made me itch to move away, afraid he may attack again. “She will take every inch of you unless we leave before she can. I know how to get out of here. You have to trust me on this.”

  “It’s a little late for secret hatches in the floor, Kayden.”

  “Listen to me, Essie,” he urged, his tone playing chords in my heart. His voice dropped even lower, barely above a growling whisper. Wrapping a hand around mine, I quickly drew back the sparks of my flame, feeling his icy skin press against mine. “Grab Ari, and when we break the ceiling, release your wings.”

  “I can’t-”

  “Yes, you can,” he pressed, and somehow I felt reassured. His voice tensed every muscle in my body and unraveled them in the same breath. “You did it that night in the backyard, you did it in the hallway. You can do it now.”

  Decisions, decisions. Everything tipped in the favor of me throwing myself at the Queen’s gnarled and malevolent skirts and dying trying to kill her versus hanging around a soul-sucking demon with a possibly manic-suicidal plan. But I didn’t come this far just to let everything slip from my fingers again. I made a promise to Ursula, to Jayson, to myself, that I wouldn’t be like everyone else; I wouldn’t leave them all behind.

  Somewhere in my head, bells and the sound of sweet, angelic voices rang pure in a growing crescendo. My blood swelled in my veins, fire rushing off my skin and covering me in a blazing blue gown that adorned my shoulders and chest, swirling around my legs in a skirt wild enough to rival the Queen’s. Crystal wings shot from my back, glimmering with the gentle force fit for a true descendent of an angel.

  “Your time has come, Lucretia,” I spoke with all the authority I could muster, drawing on my last drops of adrenaline. “No more pretending. I will slaughter the poison you’ve pushed into my veins, until every last drop is free. And then I will come back for you, and I will kill you.”

  Kayden began to disperse, all of his body washing into a whipped cloud of black. I grabbed Ari’s hand, shouting in his ear, the black surrounding us. The sound of explosions and shattering glass filled my ears, a high-pitched whistling piercing my ears, and with a jolt like a rocket we shot through the ceiling and into the twilight sky. I pressed my face into Ari’s shoulder as my crystal wings wrapped around both of us, a scream of rage sounding from far below. The rush was too much. Just as I blacked out, I prayed that trusting Kayden was the right thing to do.

  CHAPTER FOUR

  PLACEBO EFFECT

  The first thing I tasted was blood.

  Rolling over onto my side, I coughed, coloring the wet tawny sand beneath me splotches of dark red. Something in my gut twisted, a fire far from my gift burning in my chest. Voices swam around my thoughts, reaching deeper into the corners of my memories, pulling on the threads that barely kept me stitched together. My lungs burned, each breath of air becoming more difficult to finish. Spots of black decorated my sight, blocking out the oddly gentle, unmoving sky, until nothing but darkness pulled me under.

  I was underwater.

  Dark, twisting ocean waters seemed to stretch in every direction, leaving me lost in the midst of a never-ending sea. Swirls of bruised navy, burned green, and leeched grey lingered around me. They filled in the space, leaving me suspended in a backdrop of muted colors hinting at something far more dark than I was immediately aware of.

  Oddly, my lungs didn't ache. There was no burning need to breathe, no sting of the chest to warn me that I was dying. Instead I felt peaceful, the misery compounded inside of me gone, vanished with the water around me.

  I had only just begun to close my eyes when something caught my attention. A dash of yellow, coming in my direction. It came closer with every rocking motion of the sea, until I came face-to-face with a familiar person.

  She looked beautiful, her soft blonde hair floating calmly about her. Perfect, pale skin gave way to dainty and fragile features, instantly reminding me of a porcelain doll.

  This wasn't the first time I had her. Then again, it probably wouldn't be the last. It was me, an imprint of what I once was, back before I knew how marred my life was. Back before I learned how important I had become to a mix of supernatural races, all pining for my blood.

  Oh Ebony, how you continue to haunt me.

  She lingered in the water in front of me, hands wrapped around her sides as if she were cold. Her eyes were shut, face composed into a mask of peace and serenity. If I hadn't known better, I would have thought she was sleeping.

  As if she could read my thoughts, she opened her eyes. Large, bottomless brown orbs stared back at me, their stare practically digging into my soul with chipped, broken nails.

  “You came back,” she said, a hint of surprise in her tone. Her red lips spread into a small, yet bright smile. “I knew you'd see me again.”

  “Where are we?” I waved a hand through the water, keeping my eyes on my carbon copy. “Is this all a dream?”

  Her smile widened. “Not exactly.”

  “Then what is it?” A shock ran through my body. “Am I... am I dead?”

  A flash of something, sorrow perhaps, ran through her eyes. She placed a comforting hand on my shoulder. “That's your choice.”

  “Oh, so there's a choice now if I die? Not sure if Death will like me messing up his collections roster,” I muttered sarcastically. A heaviness was beginning to seep into my body, the all too familiar sensations of life blossoming on my skin, charging in my cells. Bruises I hadn't even realized I was missing rapidly pooled in patches over my body, each one like a bee sting.

  The lovelier version of me remained unharmed, hand still on my shoulder. Either she had one hell of an iron stomach, or she was used to seeing bruises spawn on people in record time. Then again, if this was all my imagination, maybe I made her up to be stronger than me.

  “Essallie, look below,” she told me. Turning my gaze below the both of us, all I saw was an endless stretch of black. A mystery, hiding secrets far beyond my reach. “What do you see?"

  I stared down at black expanse below. At first, nothing but darkness stared back at me, and I had half the nerve to call Ebony out on messing with my head. But a closer look brought out shapes, features of a person, chained to the ocean floor.

  Without words, I knew who it was. How could I not know that ha
ir, the set of those shoulders? I looked up at my copy in horror, the question glued to my lips.

  “You have a choice,” she whispered, a grin of pure malice spreading across her face, her enjoyment barely containable. She raised a hand and pointed above, then pointed back to the very thing ripping my heart in two. “The question is, which one will it be? Which one will you choose?”

  I opened my mouth again to speak. This time, water rushed into my empty lungs, the taste of salt and brine cloying my senses. I couldn’t die, not like this, not in a dream. Not with the way things were left.

  I had seconds, ten at the most, to decide. To free myself from the burning sensation of dying by drowning, or to save the person below in an act of sacrifice. Fight or flight, that’s what it came down to. That’s what everything came down to at this point, and I hated it. Despised it with a violent, boiling passion.

  Fight.

  “Dammit, Essallie, breathe.”

  Someone was shouting, begging. The voice was aching, smooth and fierce. Weight pounded on my chest, slamming into the fire that rippled inside of me like a wildfire. Fight repeated in my mind, the word boiling deep in my chest and throat, begging to be free. I had to tell the voice I wanted to fight, had to breathe. My lungs stayed still.

  “Essallie, for the love of it all, open your eyes,” the voice commanded, stronger, more frantic.

  I could feel the body attached to the voice, his breath splashing against my cheek, tickles of heat itching my nose. The voice was close enough to kiss, to feel the faint whispers of breath. I moved to open my eyes, to see what was causing the painful pressure weighing on my chest, but couldn’t. Warm lips crashed against mine, air rushing down my throat, chest inflating.

  “Dammit, why did you have to trust that wild idiot?” The infuriated voice nearly screamed, and I felt another jolt shock my chest. Electric flew through me, shocking my eyes open faster than I could register the movement. I coughed again, this time harder than the first, the taste of copper, salt and sand coating my lips.

  Ari was hovering above me, a fist driving into my chest repeatedly as he pushed for me to breathe. Small, jagged cuts covered his face and barren arms, tiny rivulets of blood running into one another to form a bizarre look of red chain mail. His eyes crackled a dark, ocean-bottom blue against his smooth, pale skin. The moment he saw my eyes flutter open, he stopped, reaching for my face with his raw, scratched hands.

  Nausea shoved my stomach high into my throat. I had barely made it onto my side when I heaved what felt like a gallon of bile, salt water, and blood. I must have fallen into the water, and Ari saved me. But the dream, the one I had blacked out into that had me underwater, I thought it had only been a dream. It wasn’t real, it couldn’t have been. I was so deep in the ocean, the pressure would have crushed me instantly. And what was at the bottom...

  I collapsed onto my back, staring unseeing at the dawning sky above. Not too far in the distance, I could hear waves breaking against the shore, a familiar slosh of frothy waves tearing into the rough sand. I pushed up onto my elbows, staring at the waves of waist-high grass and damp sand surrounding us. A far cry from the black walls and eerie sensations of Lucretia’s castle.

  “Thank you,” I whispered and winced. My throat felt like it had been scrapped clean with sandpaper, leaving my voice hoarse and raw. “Where... are we?”

  He collapsed against the sand, laying alongside me with a weariness I had never seen in him. Anger touched his face, setting his mouth into a tightly drawn line, eyes quickly changing from the damaged, hurt look I had watched to sweltering rage. Fear blew off him like a fine mist, blending with his anger. “I don’t know. All I saw was smoke when we left.”

  “Where...” I took in as shallow a breath I could to avoid the pain in my throat. “Where... where is Kayden?” When Ari didn’t answer at first, I repeated the question, growing frantic. “Ari, where is he?”

  “Use your eyes, silly girl,” a dark voice mocked me from afar. I tilted my head to the side, a rush of relief flooding my senses at the sight of Kayden’s familiar black smoke. It curled lovingly around his thin, pale frame, like threads of power branching out for freedom. But that was all about him that reflected his normal self; his skin, normally tan and rich, looked pale and sick, stretched thin over his bones. His short, spiky black hair had grown tangled and curled as it wrapped around the sides of his face, shielding his eyes. Even his black eyes, normally hovering between a warm caramel and midnight black, appeared shattered and bruised, black and white blotches standing out like popped blood vessels. Somehow, Kayden had become broken, more so than how I had left him after he leapt to protect me.

  I was beginning to think there was more to Kayden than he let on.

  I moved to get up, collapsing back when my legs gave out. What little adrenaline I had left seemed to have dissipated after I had used my wings. Heat boiled my skin, the turtleneck Ursula had given me clinging uncomfortably to me. I made a mental note to find the prettiest, biggest flowing shirt I could next chance I got to change.

  “Kayden, where in the hell are we?” I called over to him, frowning. We were on what looked like a sandbar, or small tropical island of a sort. Water fanned out around us, hues of light blues and greens reminding me of birds of paradise. Palm trees stood in sporadic bursts, dark green leaves framing like nature’s idea of an umbrella. Further in-land, a sway of waist-high grass, uncut, stretched as far as the eye could see. Tints of red, orange, and pink blended to create a relaxing sky. Sitting on the beach and staring out to sea, it felt like the world around me expressed the opposite of how I felt.

  Kayden shook the curls away from his eyes, and slowly they turned back to normal. Dark hazel danced inside his iris as he smirked ever so slightly. “Well, Dorothy, we’re definitely not in Kansas anymore.”

  And just when I think I see something different in Kayden, like a child playing with a butterfly, he rips off the wings.

  Before I could open my mouth to snap back, he started forward, leaving Ari and I behind. “We’re going to meet an old friend.”

  Ari helped me up to my feet, a hand around my waist as I leaned on him for support. Kayden led the way, keeping a good chunk of distance between us. Beside me, I watched Ari snicker, willing himself not to laugh aloud. “Didn’t take you for the type to know what friends mean, let alone have one.”

  Over his shoulder, I heard Kayden laugh. “And I didn’t take you for the jealous type.”

  The hand on my waist instantly tightened. “You’re playing a fool’s game, demon. She might like you, but I sure as hell don’t.”

  “Oh, what a pity, I was looking for someone to lead my fan base.” Kayden gave a dramatic sigh, slouching his shoulders for added effect. “Now who will I pass my second-hand ladies to?”

  Ari picked up the pace, practically dragging my feet as he kept me locked in an iron grip. I felt like a rag doll in his arms. He dodged around a spare palm tree. “For the record, I would have left you behind. You’ve done nothing but bring Essallie misery and pain into her life.”

  “Excuse me, I can speak for myself,” I interjected.

  It fell on deaf ears. Kayden slowed his walk to a stop, turning around to face both of us. His eyes locked on mine. “And yet, she still wants me here.” His smirk flickered, turning into a weak, sad smile. “Even if she didn’t want me here, I’d still be around. So long-”

  “As she lives, I know,” Ari snarled. In one move, he released me from his grasp, closing the gap between him and Kayden. He grasped Kayden’s shirt, eyes narrowed to slits. “I don’t care if she dies tomorrow, in five minutes, or five years. You don’t get to hurt her, don’t touch her, don’t even acknowledge her.”

  Staggering, I swore. “What is it with all this damn territory marking? You’d think I’d be interested in either of you with the way you’re baiting each other.” I shoved past both of them, half-limping, half-jogging to put space between us. Now was not the time to play a game of ‘Who Feels For Who’. “Seriousl
y, you both need to get off the hormone-” I stumbled, my foot catching on a stray branch.

  Ari was by my side in a second, hands around my middle as he straightened me upright. Pain flared in my ankle, shooting up my leg like the after-effects of a wound. I muttered something under my breath, reaching down to pull up the fabric of my ocean-soaked jeans. A scrape, bubbling with blood from a superficial gash, spread along the bottom of my ankle, running along the sides of my foot.

  I moved to curse, when the air around us gusted, flaring hair around my face. I looked up, startled, to see Kayden standing nearly a football field length away, body rigid as a plank. Smoke curved off him, waving skyward in a thin arc from where he had been standing beside us seconds ago. His pale skin turned translucent, eyes swallowed in black that obscured his irises.

  “What the hell, Kayden?” I shouted, moving across the distance he’d thrusted between us.

  He vanished back further inland, to the point where I could barely make out the shake of his head and the flash in his eyes. A low, guttural noise tore through his throat, raising the hairs on my arms as ice slithered down my spine. “Don’t... don’t come near me.”

  I paused, worry shuffling around my thoughts. I thought back to the castle, my hands on the chains in the race to set him free, and how he’d nearly begged for me to leave him. He had been trying to warn me of his bloodlust, and I had ignored him. But why would he be afraid, why the sudden need to rip and tear me apart? It’s not like I had given him a taste of my blood...

  A sickening revelation hit me, steamrolling my gut. My palms turned cold, sweat beading over the skin as my heart jostled in my chest. It was as if someone had poured acid in my veins. “Ursula was forcing you to drink my blood. That’s it, isn’t it? That’s why you can’t stand to be around me, that’s what’s driving your bloodlust.”