All We Have (Thirty-Eight #4)

by Len Webster

  His hands were on her shoulders before he pulled back. “It’s Arthur. If my youngest son’s fiancée calls me Arthur, you can, too.”

  “Okay, Arthur.”

  “Melissa would have loved you. You’re exactly what she would have wanted for him,” Rob’s father said with a smile and glassy eyes.

  Her heart clenched. Not in pain but something more. Something else. Hearing that Rob’s mother would have loved her meant so much. She felt worthy of Rob’s love. And she felt worthy to be with him. That to his family and loved ones, they would never use her past against her.

  “Want to go surprise the crap out of him?” Julian asked with a large grin on his face.

  She nodded. “Lead the way.”

  “You’re not well,” Serge whispered as he entwined his arm around hers.

  Following Stevie, Julian, and Arthur down the lake, Ally felt the shortness of her breath. Her entire body seemed too weak at some stage and then too heavy at others. She had strong painkillers in her bag, but she’d take them after she saw Rob and when she was alone.

  “I’m fine.”

  They’d passed so many spectators, competitors, officials, coaches, and families that all their faces had blurred into colours for Ally.

  “Ah, there he is. He’s with his coach going over his scull.” Arthur used his index finger to point out his son.

  Ally smiled and then turned her gaze over to him. Rob was in his dark blue racing suit with his sunglasses on as he spoke to his coach. She pulled away from Serge and took a step towards him. But that step was accompanied by a sway and air suddenly became thin, almost non-existent when she inhaled.

  “Serge,” she whispered as she kept her eyes on Rob. She could hear Serge take a deep breath, something she was envious of. She attempted one more time, but she couldn’t and then blackness began to take away her sight from her. Somewhere she could have sworn she’d said, “I’m sorry,” before the darkness claimed victor.

  “ALLY!” a woman screamed.

  Rob’s entire body froze.

  He knew that woman’s voice.

  It was Stevie.

  The hairs on the back of his neck stood up as his heart pounded in his chest. A cold sweat had broken and his breathing had stopped once he’d craned his neck in the direction of his brother’s fiancée’s scream. His father, brother, and Stevie had blocked what was going on. But through their gaps, he saw her ash-blonde hair on the path.

  “Get the paramedics!” Julian ordered.

  Paramedics …

  “Robbie!” This time, his father had shouted for him.

  Just as he was about to bolt towards his loved ones, his coach, Ralph, grabbed his arm, stopping him.

  “I’m sure it’s fine. You’re competing soon. You’re not in your scull by those warning bells and that’s everything you’ve ever worked hard for gone,” Ralph said. He almost sounded like he was warning Rob.

  Rob pulled his arm free, removed his glasses, and handed them to Ralph. “That’s the woman I love.”

  “It’s a fainting spell. It’s hot out. This is Nationals, Rob. Make a choice.”

  Nothing in his entire life would have ever prepared him. When Rob was ten, his mother had wished for him to be a good man when he grew up, and now, at twenty-five, what defined him was a choice.

  One simple choice.

  And that would always be her.

  Rob leant in close and looked his coach in his eyes. “Her, Ralph. Always her. I love her more than rowing. Tell Rowing Victoria that I won’t compete. She comes before all of this. Before you and especially before me. You don’t like her? Then fucking quit, Ralph. She’s my life.”

  The realisation swept over Ralph’s face. His mouth went slack as he nodded. “Go to her.”

  He didn’t need to be told twice. Rob spun around and bolted for his family.

  “Allison!” he cried out desperately.

  His father, brother, and Stevie stepped aside and that was when Rob saw her. Eyes closed and incredibly pale.

  “What’s wrong with her?” he demanded as he dropped to his knees next to her.

  Serge didn’t answer as he provided CPR, beating on her chest to revive her.

  “She came to watch you race and then she just collapsed,” Stevie said, only just coherent with all her sobbing.

  Rob clutched Allison’s hand and flinched at how cold she felt. His tears blurred his vision as Serge continued to make compressions on her chest.

  “Come on, Allison,” he pleaded. “Come on.”

  Serge pinched her nose and performed rescue breaths, Allison’s chest rising. Then his hands returned to her chest. “Stay with me, piccola!”

  Rob felt helpless, sitting there holding her hand. He shook his head, not understanding what was going on.

  “Serge, the paramedics are here,” Stevie announced as the ambulance pulled up behind Allison’s bodyguard.

  Rob didn’t need to look up to see that Stevie was still crying; he had heard it in her voice. He closed his eyes and prayed to God and his mother. He’d only just gotten her back. He didn’t want to lose her again.

  “How long has she been unconscious?” the tall, female paramedic asked.

  “Few minutes,” Julian answered, the fear consumed his voice. It was strong but it also held vulnerability.

  “Okay, we’ll take over, sir,” the paramedic announced. Serge hadn’t stopped his resuscitations as he ignored her.

  The shorter, more muscular male paramedic pulled a defibrillator out of the bag on his shoulder. “We’re going to need you all to take a step back and give us room. What’s her name?”

  “Allison,” Rob croaked out, tears escaping down his cheeks.

  “We’ll take care of Allison,” she said as she got to her knees next to Serge. Then she pressed two fingers against Allison’s neck, searching. “Jake, we have a pulse. Get me an oxygen mask.”

  In a matter of seconds, the female paramedic was handed the mask and she slipped it over Allison’s face. Then the other paramedic had taken out the gurney from the ambulance.

  “Sir, we need you to let go of her,” the woman said in a calm and stern voice.

  “I can’t leave her,” Rob said, tightening his grip on Allison’s hand.

  Serge was now by his side, his hand on Rob’s shoulder. “You can ride in the back with her. Just let them do their job.”

  He’s right.

  She needs to get to a hospital.

  Rob reluctantly let go of Allison’s hand and got to his feet. The paramedics worked together and lifted Allison up onto the gurney.

  “Carrie, your call,” the male paramedic said.

  She nodded. “Is Allison on any medication?” she asked them.

  Just as Rob was about to say no, Serge stepped forward and said, “She is.”

  What?

  Carrie’s shoulders dropped as if her worst nightmares were coming true. For Rob, it had been. “What does she have?”

  Serge tensed as if he were reluctant to reveal why Allison was on medication. “Chronic kidney disease. Last time she was checked, she had middle stage kidney failure.”

  “Jake, get her in the back of the ambulance, we’ll drive to the Royal Melbourne. Get there faster than waiting for the Air Ambulance chopper.”

  Kidney failure.

  Chronic kidney disease.

  “Son,” his father said next to him. “She needs you to be strong right now.”

  “She kept it from me,” he said in a small voice. “Like Mum …”

  His father’s hand settled on his shoulder as they worked at getting Allison in the back of the ambulance. “I know. But you can’t think like that. Ride in the back with her. We’ll follow.”

  “I love her. I can’t … I can’t lose—”

  “Robbie, you won’t. Come on,” his brother said. “She’ll be okay.”

  His chest burned as it had when he found out about his mother’s cancer. He lost his mother. He’d be damned if he sat back and did nothing. No. He cou
ldn’t lose Allison, too.

  “Will you be joining us?” Carrie asked as she held the door opened.

  Rob turned to Allison’s bodyguard. “Serge, do you—”

  “No, Mr Moors,” he said. “I must contact her family. You ride with her. She’ll want you.”

  He nodded and quickly made his way into the back of the ambulance. Once he sat down, he grabbed her cold hand as Carrie joined them and shut the door.

  “We made a deal,” he sobbed. “Don’t you dare leave me, Allison. I love you. We gotta get to Rio together. You promised you wouldn’t break our deal.”

  When they arrived at the Royal Melbourne Hospital, the paramedics had taken Allison into the emergency room and had refused his request to be with her. It had taken them just a little over an hour to drive back to the city with the sirens hollering and flashing. His brother, father, and Stevie had been thirty minutes behind. They had stopped by Julian’s place to grab Rob some clothes to wear. A grey pair of track pants and a black T-shirt to wear over his rowing suit.

  There were no updates.

  They wouldn’t give him any because he wasn’t family and had to wait until her parents arrived.

  Serge had called Allison’s family and they had rushed from a conference in Brisbane to be with her. Allison’s cousin, Veronica, and her daughter, CeCe, had arrived not long after from Sydney. It had been almost four hours since Allison had collapsed when her parents arrived at the hospital. Minutes later, the doctor had called them over to speak to them.

  “You all right?” Julian asked as he sat next to him and handed Rob the coffee from the coffee machine.

  Rob stared at the takeout cup, afraid he’d cry if he looked at his brother. “I didn’t know she was sick.”

  “I thought she was pregnant with your kid. You know, the nausea and tiredness,” Julian confessed.

  “I’d rather she was.” He handed his brother the paper cup and ran his hands over his face. “I can’t lose her, Julian. Not like how we lost Mum.”

  Julian draped his arm around Rob’s back and brought him close to him. “Don’t worry. Ally’s going to be okay.”

  Rob’s eyes glazed over. “She’s been sick all this time, and I treated her like shit. I hindered her health. That’s what she told me once. Why didn’t I pick that up, Julian? Why didn’t I?”

  “Stop, Robbie,” his brother pleaded.

  “She was going to New York to see her specialist,” Serge said, interrupting them as he took the seat on Rob’s right. “That’s why she bought an apartment there.”

  “She chose to go to my race instead of getting help?” He raised his voice.

  Allison’s bodyguard nodded. “Choosing you saved her life.”

  Choosing me saved her life.

  Those tears now ran down his face. He couldn’t image a life without her. She had to get better. He would be there every day, helping her.

  Serge sighed and faced Rob, tears in the European bodyguard’s eyes. “Love is intangible, Mr Moors.”

  “What?”

  “Love is intangible because it’s meant to be felt within. It’s meant to be experienced. If it were a solid possession, no one would appreciate its force. Allison’s love for you—it’s intangible. It can’t be physically touched, but it’s felt inside. You know that. I love her like a daughter. My love for her is special. But the love she has for you, it’s inspiring. You need to find strength in that. So if you want to blame anyone, blame me for not doing my job,” Serge insisted.

  “Serge—” he’d said before he noticed David and Imogen O’Connor returning to the waiting room with tears in their eyes. “How is she?”

  Allison’s father shook his head. “She’s stable. Her body’s failing her. And her kidneys are only functioning at ten to fifteen percent of their capacity. Her kidneys are far further gone than she or her doctor had thought.” Sydney’s richest man broke down crying in front of him. The same man who had offered him money to stay away from his daughter. “She’s dying.”

  Dying.

  The ‘D’ word.

  “No,” Rob said, shaking his head. “She can’t die!”

  “I’m glad she found someone who loves her like you do,” her mother, Imogen, said as she sniffed and wiped her tears away. “We’ll be putting her on the transplant waiting list, but it could be years.”

  “I can’t give her my kidneys because I have high blood pressure … I’ve killed my daughter,” David cried as his wife wrapped his arms around her.

  “Stop that, David,” Imogen said softly. “She’ll get one. We just have to wait.”

  Her father couldn’t give her a kidney.

  People could live off one …

  I could live off one.

  Rob got off the waiting area chair and stepped closer to her parents. “What’s Allison’s blood type?”

  David and Imogen broke their embrace and stared at him with wide, glassy eyes. Imogen had pressed her lips together before she said, “A positive. Do you know someone?”

  A positive.

  Relief and hope flooded his chest.

  I couldn’t save my mother …

  Rob nodded. “Me. She can have my kidney.”

  But I’ll do anything to save Allison.

  “After extensive tests, it’s a match. He’s healthy and he’s been put on the list. His medical recently helped.”

  Who?

  “Don’t break our deal, Allison.”

  I won’t.

  “I’m sorry, Ally. I got a tattoo recently. I let you down, I’m so sorry I’ve been a terrible brother.”

  You got a tattoo? Dad’s going to kill you, Liam!

  “Piccola …”

  Serge? Why do you sound so sad?

  “Ally, it’s me, Clara. God, I’ve missed you.”

  I’ve missed you, too.

  “I’m sorry, Allison. As your father, I’ve let you down in more ways than one. I wish I had known about your health. I wish I hadn’t made you afraid of me. I wish I never pushed you into a life that made you miserable.”

  It’s okay, Dad.

  “Ally, my brother needs you. We all need you. Don’t give up on all of us, okay?”

  I won’t. I need you all.

  “You’re one of my best friends, Ally. I can’t lose you like this. We all love you. You’ll never feel lonely ever again, I promise.”

  Thank you, Stevie.

  “Keep fighting and being strong. I’ll see you on the other side, my love. I love you, Allison. Stay with me.”

  I’m not going anywhere without you.

  I love you, Robbie.

  “There were complications. He was more than willing to donate blood. But we’ve had to put her in a medically induced coma until she heals. Your daughter could reject his kidney. It’s highly unlikely, but we can’t rule that out.”

  Coma …

  Beep.

  Beep.

  Beep.

  What is that?

  The sound was constant. It was loud, as if it were next to her. Ally attempted to lift her eyelids, but it was no use. She couldn’t open her eyes. In fact, she felt no movement at all. She couldn’t move her toes. It was weird. Her mind was working. Her body wasn’t. Panic set in. She had no control over her limbs. Those beeps increased, sounding erratic. Then she heard a rush of footsteps and hands on her.

  “Ally, relax,” the soft female voice instructed. “Soon. I promise you’ll be okay soon.”

  There were hushed voices further in the darkness that she couldn’t hear properly. There was also a sob and then some yelling.

  A warm hand settled over hers. It felt nice. It felt comforting. “There are a lot of people waiting for you. Wake up when you’re ready, my dear.”

  Okay.

  Then the darkness swallowed her once more.

  “He’s being discharged tomorrow. He saved your life. The tests look good. You won’t ever need dialysis, Ally. Your brother’s here, too. He’s prepared to donate if your body rejects the transplanted kidney. We�
��d have to wait a year, but …”

  The man sighed.

  “They said your body’s too weak at the moment. You have to wake up soon. You didn’t fight this hard to give up. He loves you and needs you.” The man squeezed her hand. She felt the warm sensation of his touch shoot up her arm. He sounded sad and familiar. “I love you, piccola. I love you so much.”

  Piccola …

  Oh, God, Serge.

  A loud beep sounded. In time with the spike her heartbeat made. She felt it. The warmth that had started in her hand spread throughout her.

  Come on, Ally.

  She tried to open her eyes, but they were too heavy to lift. All she could do was squeeze his hand, hoping he felt it.

  “Piccola?” The surprise and relief boomed in his voice.

  Fighting hard against the heaviness, Ally put all her strength in opening her eyes. It took several attempts before she could see a crack of the bright room. Her throat felt dry as she opened her mouth to speak. The first attempt was nothing but air being expelled.

  “Serge?” It came out as a croak.

  “I’m here,” he assured, squeezing her hand.

  It took several attempts until her eyelids were able to lift. The brightness of the room had her cringing and slamming her eyes shut once more. She took a deep breath and slowly opened her eyes.

  She was in a hospital room.

  It smelt like a hospital room.

  She didn’t like the smell of disinfectant hitting her nostrils. As her eyes adjusted to the brightness, she craned her neck to see her Serbian bodyguard with tears in his eyes.

  “Jesus, Serge. Here I thought you didn’t cry. I might need a new one of you,” she teased. Her voice wasn’t as strong as she was used to. It almost didn’t sound like her.

  Serge leant over and kissed the top of her head. “When you collapsed, you stopped breathing and … I thought I lost you. I thought we all lost you.”

  “I’m sorry, Serge,” she said softly.

  The last thing she remembered was Rob by his boat at the national championships, ready to compete for the national men’s single scull title. Then she saw black. Her attempts to get to him to see him race were all for nothing.