North Country Mom

by Lois Richer

  “You? Incompetent as a father?” She made a sound of disgust. “Give me a break. Anyway, flying a kite isn’t important when it comes to fatherhood.”

  “It’s important to me.”

  “Why?” Alicia asked, confused. He had everything else. Why would a kite matter?

  “Because it matters to Giselle.” His voice was flat. Tiny stress lines fanned out from his eyes. “My daughter is counting on me and I’ll look like an idiot because I can’t get this thing airborne.” He thrust the kite away from him as if it were a weapon.

  “Like you could ever look like an idiot.” She sniffed in disbelief. “You’re the kind of put-together person we all admire. People like you have their lives totally on track. A kite can’t ruin that.”

  “On track?” He barked a laugh. “Totally untrue.” From the way his lips pinched together, she knew he needed more from her.

  “Jack,” she began gently. “The point is to have fun with your daughter. Giselle wants to spend time with you, not the kite. She won’t care if the two of you lose.”

  “I’ll care,” he snapped.

  Alicia was bewildered that this capable man doubted himself on such a little thing. She’d always envied him for his confidence.

  “Why would you care?” she asked at last, sensing a world of hurt lay hidden deep inside him.

  “Because I’m supposed to be in charge.” Jack’s eyes blazed silver-blue with anger that she guessed he’d kept buried inside ever since his wife died. “I failed to protect my wife. According to Teddy, I’m not great at being an hotelier, either.”

  “I’m sure Teddy never said that,” Alicia protested.

  “He didn’t have to. It’s enough he has to tell me something ten times.” He sighed. “I’m lousy at the sports people do here—hockey, football, snowshoeing—so I don’t fit in. Now I can’t even handle a stupid kite.”

  Alicia would have laughed except for what Jack said next.

  “I’m the one who’s supposed to make Giselle’s world good and right and I’m messing that up, too.”

  “You mean you’re supposed to make sure Giselle never loses anything again?” Alicia asked, latching on to his last sentence for the kernel of truth she heard there.

  Jack’s eyebrows drew together in a frown, but he nodded. “Yeah.”

  “You will fail at that, Jack,” she said flatly. “You can’t do it because it’s impossible.” His eyes flared but Alicia pressed on. “And the reason it’s impossible is because that’s not your job. You’re not God. You can’t control everything Giselle faces. You’re not even supposed to try.”

  “But I am supposed to protect her,” he argued.

  “Not by trying to be an expert at everything she wants to try. Not by putting a fence around her and not by acting like some kind of bodyguard, taking all the hits so she won’t have to.” Alicia knew she’d struck a sore spot from his angry expression. “You can’t do it, Jack. But even if you could protect her from everything, should you?”

  “What do you mean?” Jack demanded.

  “Giselle is growing up. Part of growing up is figuring out how to handle problems.” She smiled at him. “I’m pretty sure your dad wasn’t there to run interference every time you ran into a problem, was he?”

  “No, but it’s different with Giselle.” Jack’s shoulders sagged from the burden he carried. “She doesn’t have her mom anymore and this silly search for her birth mother has left her very insecure.”

  “It hasn’t left her insecure in her certainty that you are there for her.” Alicia held his gaze. “And it isn’t a silly search. It’s part of figuring out her identity. Giselle knows you’re in her corner if she needs you. She has no doubt about your love.”

  “Maybe not,” he agreed. “But love isn’t everything. The rest of it—”

  “Love is the part that counts,” she told him in a stern voice. “The rest of it she’ll handle as the issues come up. That’s how you raised her.” She smiled at him.

  “You think?” he asked dubiously.

  Alicia nodded her head.

  “I know. Your daughter will do fine, as long as you’re there when she needs you, Jack. Winning a kite-flying contest won’t affect her ability to overcome things one little bit. It certainly isn’t going to affect the way she looks at you.” She tilted her head to one side, studying him. “But I think you already know that. You just needed someone to remind you it’s true.”

  Jack stared at her for a long time, silent, his blue eyes searching hers. Alicia knew she had to go. She had a business to run. But how could she leave him like this— confused, needy?

  Jack needy? Mocking laughter filled her head.

  “You’re right, Alicia. I’m overreacting.” He squeezed his eyes closed, tilted his head back and rolled his shoulders. “You must think I’m nuts.”

  “I think you’re a nice guy who wants the best for his daughter. What’s wrong with that?” She could hear voices getting closer. “I’m sorry but I’ve got to go open my shop. See you at four?”

  “Yeah.”

  Alicia could feel his eyes burning into her back until she finally closed the back door behind her. Someone was rapping on the glass. Pushing away all thoughts of handsome Jack Campbell, she hurried to open her business.

  Wasn’t it silly that she could hardly wait until she’d see him again at four o’clock? As if she needed Jack in her world to make things better.

  Chapter Eight

  Jack could hardly tamp down his anticipation. It was ten past four. What was taking Alicia so long?

  A little bubble of happiness floated up from inside when she finally pushed through the café door, her dark hair streaming behind her. Funny to be so glad she’d left it loose.

  “The wind’s picked up,” she said in a breathless tone as she sat down across from him. “It’s a good thing I’m strong. Otherwise, it would have blown me down the street.”

  Her cheeks flushed and she slid her thick lashes down to hide her gaze from him. He thought she looked beautiful.

  “Alicia, you are the most solid, firmly planted woman I’ve ever known.” Jack smiled, for once allowing his admiration to show. “I don’t think there’s anything that could faze you.”

  “Uh—” She was obviously discomfited by his compliment.

  He scanned her shapely figure, shown to perfection in her red dress.

  “You look fantastic.”

  “You don’t have to say that, but thank you.” She brushed it off as if she didn’t believe him, and for a moment that bugged him.

  Jack couldn’t figure it out until he thought over their past conversations and recalled several times in which she’d made fleeting but denigrating comments about herself. Alicia always seemed so self-assured and confident, he’d assumed she was joking.

  Yet, at this moment, nothing in her eyes or her expression looked the least amused. Perhaps no one had ever complimented her. Jack scoffed at himself and tossed aside that thought. With her dark beauty, he’d seen the admiring glances Alicia drew wherever she went.

  “Take it from me that you are a very beautiful woman.” When she blushed again and her lashes fluttered down, Jack decided that in the future he’d pay more attention to what went on behind her dark, impenetrable stare.

  “Thanks.” Her eyes veered away from his. “This coffee is excellent. I haven’t tasted the caramel flavor before.”

  “It’s my favorite.” Jack admired the way her brown eyes glowed when she smiled. Her lashes lowered as she savored a second swallow. “So about the meeting tonight,” he began, struggling to find a way to explain what he’d done.

  “I’m really nervous,” Alicia admitted. “I told you I wanted the land beside the old stone house, didn’t I?”

  “Several times.” He leaned back, waiting. “Why?”

  “Someone started building that place forty years ago. It looks so desolate, perched on the beachhead like that, still unfinished,” she explained. “It’s an excellent tourist draw. If we b
uilt our sod house beside it, I think we’d get a lot of traffic.”

  Our sod house. Jack liked the sound of that.

  “The thing is,” Alicia murmured, her brows drawn together, “Will Sweetwater is a prominent voice on council and he’s against using that land, even though it would be perfect.”

  “What makes that tract so desirable?” Jack wondered aloud.

  “Several things. It’s easier to dig there than most other viable places. I checked it out.” She winked at him. His heart gave a bump of pleasure, glad to share in the excitement shining on her face. “Though you’d better not tell anyone that. I’ve been planning this project for a long time, Jack. I wanted my facts straight before I talked to council. But facts don’t help much with Will—”

  “Alicia,” he said, holding up a hand to cut in. “I, um, did something.”

  “Oh.” Her eyes narrowed—with fear? “Is it something…bad?”

  That slight hesitation told Jack she was afraid, though she worked hard not to show it, to pretend she was tough enough to take it. In spite of her efforts, her innocence, her transparency shone through. Such an attractive quality.

  “Did you hear they’ve nixed the project or something?”

  “No, nothing like that.” His breath snagged in his throat. How would she react? “Our meeting with council tonight has been canceled.”

  “Canceled?” Her shoulders sagged. “They don’t think I can do it, do they?” Defeat colored her voice. He realized he hated that sound.

  “Oh, they know you can do it, Alicia.” When a tiny smile flickered at the corner of her mouth, Jack felt a rush of pride that he’d been privileged to meet this incredible woman.

  He wasn’t sure his meeting with some town council members this afternoon had been impromptu. Laurel had invited him for coffee and then had to leave, but not before she’d introduced him to some men, two of them town council members, who were discussing Alicia’s request for the land. Jack had grabbed the opportunity to emphasize the soundness of it in economic terms the men would appreciate—tourism.

  “Alicia, they’ve agreed to give you the land you want, next to that abandoned stone house,” he said.

  “Really?” Her eyes grew wide. “Are you sure?” At his nod, she tipped her head back and laughed, her delight obvious. “Amazing.”

  Jack wasn’t sure how much he should say and how long her questions would take. Apparently not long at all, he realized, as he noticed a tiny frown pleat her forehead.

  “How do you know this, Jack?” Suspicion threaded her question.

  He forced his face to remain impassive. It was imperative he phrase this just right or she would think he’d interfered in a project she’d poured her heart into perfecting. He didn’t want that.

  Of course, he wanted to get on with building the sod house, but behind Jack’s real motivation, behind his focused sales pitch to the council members was a need to somehow repay the kindness Alicia had shown to Giselle. Because of her, his daughter had taken a strong interest in her new home and the history surrounding it. Because of her, Giselle was happy. Because of Alicia his world was so much better.

  “Jack?” Alicia prompted. “What’s wrong?”

  “Nothing. I overheard some men at the coffee shop talking about the sod house plan we’re supposed to present tonight. So I butted in and gave my opinion.” Choosing his words with care and keeping his own role minimized, Jack explained what had happened in broad terms. “Once they visited the site with me and I could show them what you plan and how it will impact tourism here, they were definitely in favor.”

  “I see.” She stared into her cup.

  Jack fretted that Alicia was offended by his interference until her eyes met his. A tremulous smile lifted her full lips. His heart rate ramped up.

  “I know you’re not telling me everything,” she said quietly, holding his gaze. “I know you did a lot of convincing. Thank you.”

  Her insight surprised Jack, but he shrugged it off. “I didn’t do much.”

  “So does this mean we can finally get started?” The question held undertones, as if she was afraid to trust that her dream was about to come true.

  “They said they’d formalize things tonight and that the permit would be ready tomorrow,” Jack told her, smugly satisfied by her now-blazing grin. “Let the sod house begin.”

  “Oh, Jack.” Impulsively she leaned forward, grabbed his hand and squeezed it, her face radiant with joy. “The boys are so excited about actually building something with their own hands and showing people they’re not useless and damaged as some say they are. They’re going to be over the moon.”

  “I’m glad I could help.”

  “So am I,” she murmured.

  His fingers automatically curled around hers as a spark of warmth shot up his arm straight to his heart. Jump-started, it began pounding like a jackhammer. A hard tiny place deep inside Jack softened and melted as Alicia’s beauty magnified, enhanced by the tremulous smile that lifted her lips. Her gaze held his with an invisible thread from which he couldn’t break free. And didn’t want to.

  “I can’t believe God has finally answered my prayer,” she whispered. A tiny tear glistened at the corner of her eye before tumbling onto their clasped hands. “He used you to do it, Jack.”

  Her face bloomed with color as she glanced at their joined hands. She eased hers away. At least she didn’t jerk away as she had before. He was glad of that. But then her words penetrated his brain.

  God? Had used him? Jack almost laughed. Unwilling to shatter her bubble of happiness, he let her words go without challenge. Let her revel in this first step to accomplishing her goal. He’d bask in her joy.

  “Since we don’t have to attend a council meeting, I think we should hold a meeting with the boys tonight.” Jack smiled at Alicia’s eager nod. “I’ll call Laurel and ask if it’s okay.” He made the call, delighted when Laurel enthusiastically approved. “It’s on, Alicia.”

  “Great. Maybe we can begin digging this weekend. The boys don’t have many days of school left,” she said. “They’ll soon be free to start excavating.” She frowned. “But will you be able to get away from the hotel?”

  “Yes. I’m finally starting to get the hang of things,” Jack told her.

  “That’s a change. Before, you seemed so down,” she reminded.

  “I was.” He shrugged. “Teddy read me the riot act. I still have lots to learn but I’m beginning to realize that a mistake isn’t the end of the earth.” He accepted a refill from the waitress who walked by. “You know when Giselle and I spent last Christmas with Laurel, I was already looking for a new career. It was Teddy who suggested I take over the hotel. He said May would be the best time to start because I’d have plenty of time to learn the ropes. He was right.”

  “Teddy would know. I think he looked at buying the place himself at one time.” Alicia leaned back in her chair, as relaxed now as he’d ever seen her.

  “So that’s how he knows so much about the place,” Jack murmured. “I’m very grateful for Teddy. He’s helping me understand that Churchill is a niche market. Many of the things I thought necessary don’t apply, and some things I’d never thought of doing are what Teddy calls ‘value added.’ They could help with my return on investment.”

  “So meeting Teddy was a God-incidence?” Alicia asked, her lips twitching in a teasing smile that only added to her beauty.

  “Maybe.” Jack wouldn’t go into that. “Teddy keeps telling me to lighten up, that most visitors expect rough conditions here. He claims that what they’re really looking for when they finally arrive in Churchill isn’t a five-star palace but a warm welcome, as if they’re among family.”

  “Isn’t that what we’re all looking for?” Her smile dimmed.

  The tone of her voice, the shadows in her dark eyes, the way she stared into the distance all made Jack wonder if Alicia, in spite of her aura of independence, was lonely. “It’ll be nice to work on this project with you,” he said, and m
arveled that it was true.

  Funny how only a short time ago he hadn’t really wanted to get involved with the sod house. Now he could hardly wait to start working with Alicia. Jack had a hunch that despite any issue they might run into, she would surmount it, keep her promise and make sure the sod house was complete before the mid-August deadline.

  Jack hadn’t known her long, but he’d gained a world of insight into Alicia Featherstone. He’d learned she had a reputation around town for seeking out the old, the infirm and the needy, and then she set about enriching their lives. Simple things like putting up bird feeders so an old man could sit at his window to watch, or organizing a community sewing group to create stuffed animals for kids who had to leave Churchill for medical treatment.

  Alicia was a proud woman who put action behind her talk. She wholeheartedly embraced the value her culture placed on people. Perseverance and determination defined Alicia Featherstone, and Jack’s admiration for her grew daily. The way she welcomed Giselle at her store and even encouraged her interest only solidified his respect for her.

  But he could not allow his feelings for Alicia to grow beyond admiration and respect. Though he hadn’t expected it, the raw emotions from losing Simone were diminishing. But that didn’t mean he could allow fondness for Alicia to grow. Along that way lay a world of hurt.

  Jack was not prepared to risk loving and losing again. Never again.

  And yet, if he was going to open himself to a relationship with any woman, Alicia would be the woman he chose.

  *

  Alicia tightened her fingers around the doorknob, ready to leave for her meeting with the sod house committee. She groaned when the phone pealed.

  She’d be late again. But she answered the call all the same.

  “Alicia, this is Mrs. Endersley. I’ve been thinking about your case a lot recently.” The elderly woman’s brisk tone said this call could be important.

  “That’s nice of you.” Alicia swallowed, suppressing the butterfly of hope that fluttered inside her.