Make Me Yours (Men of Gold Mountain)

by Rebecca Brooks

  Unless you made other guys lose their minds last night…

  Just one.

  And then she added, At least, I hope he lost his mind.

  He smiled. As if she could have any doubt.

  Affirmative, he wrote back. I’m officially crazy.

  That makes two of us. This day has been nuts.

  Hard to focus?

  She sent back a smiley face. Something like that.

  How come you have time to be on your phone? he asked.

  Canceled client. Gives me a few min to catch up on paperwork.

  Paperwork shmaperwork.

  I’m on my way, he typed and pressed send.

  It wasn’t like Gold Mountain was that big. He was there in five minutes.

  “Crazy,” she said again, shaking her head as soon as he walked in the door.

  He glanced down the hall, but there was no sign of Sonia or any clients. Quickly, he drew her into his arms and planted a kiss on her temple. “For you,” he whispered, sighing into the soft lavender smell of her hair, her skin, her warmth.

  She ran her hands up over his chest, through his hair, and he palmed her ass and pulled her close, nuzzling the side of her neck.

  “Not here.” She stepped away from the front window and he, moving hip to hip with her, followed until he was pressing her back against the desk. Sure, that worked just fine for him, too.

  If Sonia stayed away, and there was enough time before the next client came in, he could spread her legs right there on the desk and feel those hands messing up his hair as he started in on every filthy thing he’d been dreaming of last night…

  But there came a banging noise from down the hall, and a high pitched “Oh shit!” Claire pushed herself up, straightening her shirt and running a hand through her hair to smooth down the flyaways.

  “You okay there, Sonia?” she called.

  “Yeah, just dropped the basket of clean towels all over the floor. I’m sorry!”

  “It’s okay; I can rewash them this afternoon.” But she sighed, and Ryan wished she would realize that she didn’t have to take on everything by herself. Couldn’t Sonia wash them? And did it really have to be today?

  Sonia came bustling back down the hall, and Ryan stepped away from Claire to hopefully not look like he’d been just about to maul her. But it wasn’t far enough. Sonia gave him an obvious once-over, smirking at what must have been his manhandled hair.

  “You again,” she said with a grin.

  “Hi, Sonia,” he said bashfully, feeling like a caught teenager.

  “Make we could sneak into the back for a few minutes,” he whispered to Claire as soon as Sonia turned away.

  Claire brushed his hand and said, “Maybe.” But the phones were ringing, there was too much to do, and he knew he was just getting in the way.

  “Can you fit in a four o’clock?” Sonia asked, after putting a caller on hold.

  Claire shook her head. “I have to pick up Maya.”

  “It’s Jesse Turnbaum. Says he threw out his back again carrying groceries.”

  “Shit, I told him he has to be careful. Can you take him?”

  “I’ve already got someone. And besides, he’s one of your regulars. I know he really wants it to be you.”

  Claire pulled up a calendar on her computer. “Earliest I can get him in is tomorrow afternoon.” She winced as she said it, and Ryan knew what she was thinking. That poor man with his back thrown out would have to spend the next twenty-four hours lying on the sofa unable to move, counting the hours until Claire’s next open appointment rolled around.

  He wondered what else she was thinking. If she wished she had someone there to help her. If she was mad that Ryan was perfectly happy to fuck her once again but never did much when it came to actually being around.

  But he didn’t want to be that person anymore. He’d thought once he met Maya, he’d be able to go back to his regular life. Now he knew there was no such thing as “regular life” anymore. He wanted to be there for both of them in ways he’d never been before.

  “I can pick up Maya,” he blurted out. He was afraid he might fuck it up, do the wrong thing, make things worse in some way.

  But as soon as he said it, he knew it was the right thing to do. Even if Claire was staring at him like she’d never laid eyes on him before.

  “Sonia meets with her client, you help Jesse, and I get Maya from after-school care. It’s perfect,” he said.

  She shook her head. “Never going to happen.”

  “Why not?”

  “I can’t ask you to do that.”

  “You’re not asking; I’m offering. Maya knows me, and she’ll be thrilled. And—” He thought wildly, trying to come up with whatever argument would convince Claire this was a good idea. “I can bring her straight here so you’ll know she’s fine, and keep her busy until you’re finished. It’s a win-win.”

  He could see her waffling. “Come on,” he said gently. “Let me help you with just this one thing.” Let me take care of you.

  Finally, she agreed and scheduled a time with Jesse. Then she called Maya’s school to give permission for Ryan to handle the pickup. Before he left, she made him promise not to stop for ice cream on his way back. “I’m serious,” she said. “I know you.”

  “Yeah, yeah, yeah.” He kissed her nose. “Work your healing magic. Maya and I will be back soon.”

  “Wait!” she called and tossed him her keys. “You need to get Maya’s booster seat from the back. Or whatever, just take my car. She needs help making sure she’s strapped in.”

  “You got it,” he said with a wink, and something inside him surged. Claire may have been full of reservations, but the ease with which she’d handed over her keys said she trusted him.

  Not like picking a kid up from school was that complicated, but still. He wasn’t taking anything for granted.

  He felt weird hanging around with all the other parents outside, knowing he didn’t belong. But Maya had no such reservations. Having Ryan show up at her school might as well have been Christmas and her birthday all in one. She chattered the whole ride, not caring that they weren’t going home. But when they got to the office, and Claire was already busy in the massage room, she started getting fidgety.

  Shit. Why hadn’t Claire given him ideas about what to do to keep her occupied?

  No. He had to stop thinking like that, like it was all on her. At last, he remembered that he had his guitar in his trunk. He brought it in, and Maya watched, mesmerized, as he gave it a quick tuning. He played a little bit, and when that got old, he decided to show her how the frets worked and the different sounds of each string.

  “Do you want to try?” He lifted Maya so she was sitting in his lap and rested the guitar across her knee and his. He showed her where to hold her fingers, putting his hands over hers to act as a guide so she could strum.

  They were sitting like that, playing together, when Claire came out, a much-relieved older man walking carefully and singing her praises. As soon as he left, Maya made Claire sit and listen to what Ryan had shown her.

  “Thank you,” she mouthed to Ryan. “I seriously owe you one.”

  “It was my pleasure. We had fun, didn’t we?”

  Maya hopped off Ryan’s lap and ran to tug on Claire’s sleeve.

  “We’re getting ice cream now, right?” she said. Clearly, she had Ryan’s number.

  Claire laughed. “It’s kind of late in the day for ice cream, bug.”

  “Then just a little bit of ice cream,” Maya said, and Ryan could see where Claire’s parents had planted the idea to be a lawyer in her head. The Collins girls knew how to negotiate a deal.

  “Dinner first,” Claire said. “Then ice cream.”

  Maya thought about it. “What’s for dinner?”

  Ryan leaned over far closer than was necessary and whispered in Claire’s ear, “Let me cook for you.”

  “What?” Claire said.

  “Invite me over for dinner, but I’ll do the cooking.�
�

  He said it quietly so that if Claire said no, Maya wouldn’t be disappointed. But his hand grazed her back where Maya couldn’t see it, reminding her of where they’d left off that afternoon.

  He saw her hesitate, biting the corner of her lip, no doubt thinking ahead to all the ways this could go. Worst-case scenario, Ryan burned the crap out of everything. The other worst-case scenario, everything went perfectly, with Maya—and Claire herself—getting more attached.

  But would that really be so bad? What if he could actually have this life he’d never thought he deserved?

  “We’ll stop at the farmer’s market on the way”—he almost said home but caught himself in time—“back to your place and pick out whatever you guys want.”

  She finally agreed. Maya, distracted from ice cream, ran around in excitement, going on about how Ryan was going to meet every one of her dinosaur friends.

  He laughed, chasing her out the door like a T. rex, but inside his heart was pounding. He was acting like dinner was no big deal. And maybe it didn’t have to be. But he saw Claire watching him and Maya, and he knew that it was.

  He hoped he knew what he was doing. Because now there were three hearts at stake. Not just his and Claire’s, but innocent collateral. So he’d better not fuck this up.

  Chapter Nineteen

  For the first time in a long time, Claire had no idea what she was doing.

  There was a gorgeous man in her kitchen, filling her house with the smells of sautéing onion, the bright burst of tomatoes, spinach wilting with garlic and lemon in the pan.

  Meanwhile, her daughter was methodically bringing out every stuffed animal she owned to introduce to Ryan. Considering she was the only child of the only child of two adoring grandparents, there were a lot of introductions to be made.

  And Claire was happy. Sipping a glass of red wine he’d insisted on pouring for her, keeping Maya from getting tangled up in his feet as he moved around her kitchen, she felt…normal. Relaxed.

  It wasn’t the heady excitement of being twenty and in love, but something different. Something that could last.

  She swallowed her wine too quickly as soon as she had the thought. She was getting way too far ahead of herself. Ryan hadn’t said anything about not going to Chicago. And while he might be all about spending time with them now, this was a vacation for him. A break from his real life.

  He could go through all the motions, but what about when Chicago called, and his band, his next album, demanded his attention? Claire and Maya couldn’t give him fame or success. And she’d already dropped everything and moved across the country with him once. She wasn’t doing anything like that ever again. She was too settled here in Gold Mountain. If he actually asked her to come to Chicago, the answer would have to be no.

  So there was no future for them. Which meant she should end this now, before it became even harder.

  But when she stepped out of her last-minute massage session to see Maya sitting in his lap, his large hands enveloping hers as he patiently showed her how to play the guitar, all her resolve left her.

  If he hadn’t invited himself over for dinner first, the words would have slipped out anyway. Come over. Spend the night with me. Show me who I belong to—again.

  “Earth to Claire,” she heard, and she blinked. “Salad bowl?”

  Right. Making dinner. Not jumping his bones.

  Although the sight of him with a spatula in one hand and a stuffed bear in the other was kind of a turn-on.

  Claire got out the bowl and tongs and tried to help him by whisking up a dressing, but he was so insistent that she get out of the kitchen that she finally relented and went to make sure Maya was coloring in her coloring book and not on her other favorite spot, the floor.

  “Are you sure I can’t help?” she called, not sure what to do with this feeling of uselessness in her own home.

  “You’re supposed to be experiencing this novel sensation called relaxation,” he told her. “Give it a try, you might like it.”

  He gave his sexiest tight-lipped smile and turned back to the stove, where at least she had the satisfaction of watching his butt in those jeans.

  The other unexpected perk of having Ryan cook—aside from the view—was that Maya, normally a picky eater, went for everything just because he’d made it. Then came the promised ice cream, and they sat around clinking spoons and pretending to share with the dinosaurs.

  After dinner, Maya and Ryan played in the living room while Claire cleaned up. She couldn’t see them, but she could hear them talking, laughing, Ryan asking questions, Maya chattering up a storm. When she reluctantly went to tell them it was late and Ryan had to get home, Maya begged so hard for him to read her a bedtime story that she didn’t have the heart to say no.

  And of course, that was only an excuse. She didn’t want him to leave, either. She stood in the doorway, the wings of her heart fluttering in her chest as she looked at the two of them curled up in Maya’s twin bed while he read to her about a fish missing its hat.

  Then Maya wanted Claire to read a story, so it was the three of them smooshed all together, until finally Claire turned out the light, kissed Maya on the forehead, and led him downstairs.

  “I’m exhausted,” he said with a laugh.

  “You were a champ.”

  “Is she always this energetic?”

  “When she’s not throwing a fit.”

  “Oh,” he said. “I guess I got off easy, then.”

  “Just wait until she’s no longer showing off for you.”

  She shouldn’t have said that, implying there’d be some time in the future when Ryan was so familiar Maya wouldn’t need to be on her best behavior for him. Maybe a time when Maya knew Ryan was her father, not just some “friend” coming over. A time when this wasn’t a special, out-of-the ordinary night.

  “So,” she said awkwardly. “Thank you for dinner.”

  “It was my pleasure.”

  “And for picking up Maya.”

  “Also my pleasure.”

  “I owe you one.”

  He stepped toward her. “That would be my pleasure, too.” He paused. “Or should I say, your pleasure?”

  She swallowed, heat flaming her face. “I don’t even know if Maya’s asleep yet.”

  He nodded, suddenly serious. “I should go. I know it’s late, and I don’t want to impose.” He moved toward the door, the perfect gentleman.

  But she didn’t want a gentleman. “What if I want to be imposed on?” she said quietly.

  He turned instantly and reached for her.

  “Remember everything I told you last night?” he whispered, biting her earlobe gently before kissing down her neck with a touch so light it made her tremble.

  “I remember.” It’s only been replaying in my mind all day.

  “That’s everything I’m going to do to you. And then some.”

  Claire’s breath caught. Maya wasn’t a light sleeper. But there was no telling what might happen on any given night. She might stumble out of bed to pee or get a drink of water and hear something, come downstairs, and need thousands of dollars in therapy for the rest of her life.

  But it was too late to send Ryan home. There was no hope that she could still backtrack, return to that time when her heart had hardened over, leaving no space for Ryan Thomas in her life.

  He slid his arms down her back and held her closer. She fit so perfectly against his body. No matter what changed, she still felt at home in his arms.

  And some changes, she realized, were good ones. Ryan wasn’t the same man she’d had to leave when she was pregnant. She didn’t need to be the same person, either—tentative, waiting, desperate to be good.

  This was what she needed. Him. Now.

  She grabbed the front of his shirt in her fists and yanked him to her, pressing her mouth up to his.

  Chapter Twenty

  Ever since he stopped drinking, Ryan had craved sugar. Ice cream, chocolate, a packet or three in his coffee—he couldn�
�t get enough.

  Only now, when he tasted Claire’s lips, did he know what he was really hungry for. It wasn’t just the sweetness on her tongue. It was her.

  He kissed her greedily, pulling her body to him so they were aligned together, shoulder to shoulder, hip to hip, his erection straining hard against his jeans so he knew that she could feel it.

  He wanted her to feel it. He wanted her to know what she did to him.

  She slid her hands up his arms, over his biceps and his chest, and he pushed her back, pinning her against the arm of the couch.

  “We have to be quiet,” she whispered as he pressed his hips into her.

  “I told you—it’s you and those whimpers I’m worried about.” He drove into her for emphasis, and she let out a soft moan.

  “See? I might have to cover your mouth.” He put his palm over her lips.

  But that only gave her a chance to bite him playfully, making slow, firm circles with her tongue that let him know exactly what that mouth of hers could do.

  Now he was the one who had to smother his groan against the crook of her neck. He brought a hand up under her shirt, pulling down the cup of her bra to tweak her pointed nipple, her gasp driving him all the more out of his mind.

  “I can’t remember if I closed Maya’s door,” she panted, and he could practically hear her brain competing with her body as she writhed against him.

  “I can go check.”

  “What if she wakes up and sees you?”

  “Then you check. I’ll wait for you.” It might kill him to keep his cock pressing up against his fly another second, but at least he’d go out happy.

  “Maybe it’s better if we go to my bedroom.”

  He kissed along her jaw. “I like the sound of your bed.”

  “Or should we stay out here?”

  “Too much thinking, baby.”

  “The condoms are upstairs.”

  “Then let me lay you back in your bed. Or turn you over, so you can scream into your pillow.”

  “Oh, God,” she whimpered.

  “That’s okay—just Ryan will do.”

  She pushed him playfully. “Arrogant little prick.”

  “It’s not little right now, baby,” he said and brought her hand to feel the bulge that all her thinking and worry was doing nothing to lessen.