AJ

by Jessie Cooke

  Tommy was at the front desk when Madison came through the door. His mother was sitting on a stool next to him, knitting or maybe weaving something. Madison liked Ajei. She was one of those women who just seemed to ooze maternal instinct. She was always taking care of someone and sometimes Madison thought maybe Tommy didn’t appreciate her as much as he should. “Good morning, Miss Madison.” No matter how many times Madison told her, Ajei insisted on the “Miss.” Tommy said it was part of the way she’d been raised, to show respect, so Madison had finally given up and in return just called her “Miss” Ajei.

  “Good morning, Miss Ajei. Good morning, Tommy.” Tommy was wearing a sport coat and a button-down shirt. That meant that either he had a meeting with contributors to the museum, or they were expecting guests. “What’s going on today?” For the most part, Madison had been busy designing and planting the botanical garden that lay in the center of the museum. Tommy had given her a small budget, but free reign to plant what she wanted and how she wanted to plant it, as long as all of the plants were indigenous to the region. Ultimately, he wanted to include the garden in his tours and have Madison be the docent for that particular tour.

  As much as she wasn’t sure about this life, hiding out in the middle of nowhere Arizona...that much thrilled her. Teaching about plants, desert plants in particular, had been her primary goal when she finished her botany degree. She had hoped to teach at the university level one day when she finished her education, but it was another thing the fucking Garibaldis had thrown a wrench into. She appreciated that Tommy took her on the way he did, knowing very little about her. His entire family had been warm and welcoming, and she appreciated that as well. Especially since living with Jace and Rebekah had been no picnic so far. Jace was cool. He always seemed to be even-tempered and he never acted like she was an imposition. Beck on the other hand went from zero to asshole in nothing flat, and back to zero again. She wasn’t necessarily mean or rude to Madison, but she was so moody that she made Madison nervous, so she kept her distance and hadn’t gotten to know her well at all. Jace told her just the night before, however, that one of the rooms at the club would be finished soon and she could move in there. That would be a godsend for them all, she thought.

  “We have a 1st and 2nd grade class coming in from the reservation for a tour,” Tommy told her. “You think we have enough going on out there that it’ll be worth having them stop in the garden area?”

  “Sure. I’ve got one whole side blooming and the other is planted so I can show them how we prepared the soil. I also have the plants we brought in that were already mature. I think it’ll be fun. If I have time I can even prepare some cups of soil and give them each one to plant a seed before they go.”

  “That sounds great,” Tommy said. “I’ll try to keep my part of the tour as interesting as I can, but for six- and seven-year-olds, it might be hard. Some hands-on will probably be just what they need.” Ajei had stopped her knitting and she was looking at Madison.

  “I’d love to help...if I wouldn’t be in the way.”

  “Not at all,” Madison told her. “This will be my first time with kids this age, so I’d love some help.”

  Madison and Ajei left Tommy at the desk and went out to where the gardens were. As Madison gathered the things they’d need for the children to make their little “pots,” Ajei looked at the plants and told Madison what a good job she was doing. Then suddenly out of the blue Ajei said, “Your father more or less saved my life...a lot of years ago. Did you know that?”

  Madison stopped what she was doing. She didn’t know anything about her father’s life in the club other than the small amount he’d chosen to share with her. She’d gotten the feeling from the bikers she’d met here who knew him, however, that not many liked him. She didn’t understand why, but she was thrilled to hear that Ajei had something good to say about him. “No, I didn’t know that. I’d love to hear the story.” Ajei smiled and her dark brown eyes looked like they were fading into a different time and place as she spoke. Madison started out working as she listened, but as the story grew, so did her interest. She found herself pulling up one of the folding chairs and having a seat. She was on the edge of it as Ajei spoke about the bikers who called her and Rock racial slurs while they were walking in Boston, and seemed to have a lot more sinister intentions on their minds.

  “Rock did what he had to do to protect both of us,” she said, about her old man knocking the men out. “But we knew that the police might not see it that way, so we tried to run. They caught us and after we were both booked, they released me and kept him. We had some cash, but I didn’t know Boston, and I was afraid to spend too much of the money because I worried that they’d set his bail and I wouldn’t be able to afford it. I started walking when they released me, looking for a cheap motel. It was dark and not long before I became lost and disoriented. I was also in a bad neighborhood and there were men out on the streets. At that time I was so young and...well, let’s just say I’d had a really bad experience with a man that made me hyper-vigilant about being alone with any of them other than Rock.

  “So, when this young guy with long hair on a motorcycle tried to stop and talk to me, I was having none of it. I tried to run straight into an even worse neighborhood. Your father grabbed me, he was trying to help, but I freaked out and kicked and bit and did everything I could to get away from him. Thankfully, he didn’t leave me alone. When I calmed down he took me to a safe place where I could live, rent free, and eventually he got me a job. He was so kind...and unlike a lot of men, he never asked for anything at all in return. He was content to just be my friend, and I needed that. I will always be grateful to him. Your father has a good soul.”

  “Thank you for telling me that story, Ajei. I didn’t really grow up with him. He was in and out of my life and I always wished I knew him better. My mother never said anything bad about him, but the rest of the family...my grandparents, and aunts...they had nothing good to say. I know he wasn’t the ‘ideal’ version of a father, but I was always like you...I felt the good in him. He was good to me at least.”

  Ajei smiled. “And that’s what matters the most. Tommy might tell you about his upbringing someday and in that story I know I won’t be anyone’s ideal mother either. But I pray that at the end of the story he’ll be able to say the same thing about me that you can about your father.”

  Madison had a hard time imagining Ajei as not the “ideal” mother. But since she’d been on the run, she was discovering that somehow, up to that point, she’d managed to maintain an almost idealistic version of life. She’d met a lot of different kinds of people since she was forced to disappear, and as much as she hated the Garibaldis for the loss of her freedom and for not being able to see her friends or her family all this time, she almost appreciated them for forcing her to see the world in a different light. It wasn’t all pretty, but she was discovering that what she’d always heard about not judging a book by its cover was true. Jace Bell was a prime example of that. His cover scared her to death that night in the bar...but she had since discovered that when it came to picking your team, Jace would be the first one anyone with any good sense would pick.

  “You expecting anyone, boss?” Finn had just watched AJ leave. He was headed to the reservation to see Jolene, who was headed out that day for Utah. He’d seemed depressed that morning and Finn felt bad for him. He knew the guy had feelings for her; they’d spent almost every minute together when they weren’t working, for almost a month straight. But AJ was insistent that he had to get his life in order before he could commit to anyone, and he was also sure that Jolene wasn’t anywhere near ready to give up the great job she had and the opportunity to travel and settle down. Finn liked AJ a lot—he’d become almost like a big brother to him in the two months he’d been at the club—so he really hoped things worked out. He was thinking about that when he saw the other rider turn into the long dirt road that led to Jace’s driveway.

  “Yep,” Jace said, continuing to san
d the board he’d been working on. Finn waited for him to go on, but he didn’t. Jace was like that. He didn’t “waste” any words. He said what he needed to say, when he needed to say it, and the only time Finn ever heard him talk more than that was when he’d had a lot to drink. Those days were rare as well. Jace wasn’t overly controlling when it came to being their boss, and especially not with his old lady. But when it came to himself and the way he carried and conducted himself, he was practically militant about it. “You can keep working.” Finn had stopped painting the cabinets he’d been working on for the kitchen in the club, in order to be nosy. He grinned at Jace and got back to work, but as soon as his boss wiped off his hands and headed over to where the Harley was parking, he put his listening ears back on. Sometimes it was the only way he knew anything that went on around there.

  He watched the guy get off his bike. He was a big guy, not as big as Jace, but bigger than Finn. He had on a Skulls vest, but Finn could only see part of the skull and not the rocker, so he didn’t know if the guy was from Boston or California. He pulled off his helmet and a mass of blond hair fell out. Finn made a face, missing his long hair again. It was growing slowly since he’d let Bubba lop it off so he could sneak into the hospital and see his girl. The guy shook out his thick hair and Finn thought he looked like that Fabio dude who was on the front of all those romance novels in the grocery store; at least he would if he didn’t have the thick beard and mustache that covered most of his face.

  Jace and the guy shook hands and Finn heard Jace say, “It’s good to meet you. Let’s go have a seat and I’ll get you a beer or something.” He made another face just as Bubba walked into the shop.

  “What are you frowning about?”

  “Nothing. When’s lunch? I’m hungry.”

  Bubba shrugged. “Not my turn. Boots had lunch today.” Finn curled his lip again. The club didn’t have any girls hanging around yet. The guys were disappointed by that, and a little worried. They worried that Beck’s strong personality and dislike of most females would keep the “club girls” away. It was one of the big perks of being in an MC, the way the leather vest attracted women like flies. Finn didn’t care. He had Caitlin and she was more than enough for him, but the guys like Bubba who had to go looking in the local bars for a blowjob or pay a whore at the strip club for more were getting a little anxious about it. They also didn’t have any prospects. Jace had recently patched in the rest of them and that meant they were on their own for meals and things most of the time. Occasionally Beck would have a good day and offer them whatever she was making for Jace...but it was rare, especially while she’d been pregnant. So, for survival’s sake, they had come up with a schedule for things like cleaning the shop and making or buying lunch and if it was Boot’s day, Finn was sure that meant they’d be eating some healthy crap like a Poke Bowl with salmon and white rice or some other disgusting crap. He was about to express that aloud when the sound of Boots pulling onto the dirt road caught his attention.

  “It’ll probably be tofu or some shit,” Bubba said as they watched the brother with the fancy boots head their way. The closer he got, the more men stopped what they were doing and began to gather around. Tofu or barley or fucking raw salmon was better than nothing, so they’d all take it.

  “Who’s that with Jace?” Vic asked, looking over toward the house. Jace and the blond, who from this distance looked like a lion to Finn, were sitting on the porch drinking a beer and talking. Finn shrugged and said:

  “Jace was expecting him but didn’t say who he was.”

  “New recruit?” Benny, or Gaston, as they called him, had recently earned his patch. They’d given him his road name when he was still a prospect. Finn had never seen or read Disney’s Beauty and the Beast, but the other guys said there was a character who attracted women in droves as soon as he walked into a room, and he was full of himself. That description fit their new brother to a “T.”

  “He could be your beast,” Bubba said with a laugh. The other guys laughed too, but as soon as Boots parked his bike and unhooked the box of takeout from the luggage rack on back, Beauty and the Beast and the guy on the porch were forgotten for the time being. It was Boots who brought the subject back up by glancing over and saying:

  “That’s Lion.”

  “You know him?” Finn asked, happily shoveling pasta out of a paper container and onto his plate. Boots had brought Italian, one of Finn’s favorites.

  “Used to,” Boots said. “I haven’t seen him in years. He’s a nomad, works mostly for Dax back east. I wonder what Jace needs a nomad for. Any ideas?”

  “Lion’s kind of a badass nomad, like Jace used to be. They don’t use him often, just for special jobs. Nobody even knows where he lives or what he does in his off time. He’s not an overly friendly guy...and his boots always look like shit,” Boots said.

  The guys all laughed at that. Shoes, or boots, was how their road captain judged a man. He thought a man who didn’t care about what he wore on his feet was not to be trusted.

  They gossiped as they ate their lunch, but as soon as Boots spotted Jace on his way over and gave them a heads-up, they tried to come up with something to talk about before he got there so he wouldn’t know they’d been speculating about his visitor. They also knew Jace was smarter than that. “Finish lunch and then I want you all in church. We’ll use the new meeting room. I’ll introduce you to the man you’re all making up stories about and tell you why he’s really here.” They tried to look innocent, but it was like trying to look like a virgin in a whorehouse—the point was moot.

  14

  Phoenix, Arizona

  AJ pulled his bike up next to Jolene’s Jeep, outside the hogan. He sat there for several minutes, hoping to postpone the inevitable. He didn’t want to say goodbye. Jolene must have heard him drive up, and before he finally stepped off the bike she was waiting for him on the front porch. When he stepped through the gate she smiled. That smile did things to him that nothing short of physical touch had done before. The thought of being separated from her by miles for months or longer was killing him. He had never felt this way about a woman before, and he couldn’t imagine there was another woman out there that could make him feel the same. He’d actually come close to begging her to stay. AJ had never begged anyone for anything in his life, but the closer it got to time for her to leave, the more panicked he became. Thankfully, before he’d made an incredible fool out of himself, he’d had a beer with Rock. When AJ told him what he was thinking, Rock’s response had been:

  “Do you think if you had met Jolene before she was on this quest of hers, or before you were on yours, you would feel the same about her?”

  “I don’t know,” he said. “She’d still be the same person, and so would I, right?”

  “Would you? Are you the same man you were two months ago?”

  AJ thought about that. For two months he’d spent his days working with the club, but it was more than that. He wasn’t the boss. He didn’t have the stress of doing anything other than what Jace asked him to do. He ate whatever was available, or whatever he felt like going and picking up. There was no stress about making reservations, or what to wear. Even when he took Jolene out to dinner, they kept it casual most of the time and AJ came to realize he enjoyed the “nice” nights out much more when they weren’t the “norm.” Pam would never eat in anything short of a four-star restaurant and even then she’d find the reason they lost that fifth star. She didn’t cook, so if they ate in, it was takeout...never pizza or Chinese or anything “normal,” however. She’d have it catered, and most of the time served. She’d even hire people to clean up. AJ and Jolene had joined her sponsor family for dinner more than once. The whole family was involved in the cooking and cleanup and AJ came to love the times when he was elbow-to-elbow with Jolene, washing and rinsing dishes. They’d eaten Chinese takeout in the backyard. They’d ordered pizza and had a picnic in the garden at Tommy’s museum. Then they’d lain on a blanket and watched the stars come out and
made love underneath them afterwards. They created memories he’d never want to forget...but sadly he was also afraid he’d never have the chance to create more.

  “No,” he’d finally said to Rock. “I’m not the same person. I feel...free, finally. Not that I have a problem with responsibility, but I finally feel like I have the ability to choose what responsibilities I want to take on. I haven’t felt like that since my dad died. I don’t think Jolene would have liked the uptight, stuffy guy I was before I left Tempe.”

  “Then the most important question you have to ask yourself is this: If you asked her to stay, or if she let you go with her right now, would you be enhancing her life, or impeding it?”

  Again, AJ had to think about that. He rationally knew he couldn’t ask her to stay, although it was hard to think rationally when he thought about losing her. Jolene had her entire next year planned out. She would be doing what she loved, and when she talked about it she actually glowed with excitement. What she was doing was much more than just a job to her. She’d fallen in love with the people, and the culture, and she was so happy that it was impossible to be around her without smiling. AJ liked that, and he did want her to be happy. He knew if she chose him over her job, her passion, that someday she’d resent him for it. He had brought up the idea of going with her, once. Jolene had flexed an eyebrow and said, “What about your sister, and your business?” AJ still hadn’t spoken to his sister. He had tried, once. He went to the restaurant she owned, but she wasn’t in that day. He’d left his number and he’d written it down with his full name on the message paper. She had never called him and part of him wanted to just leave it at that. The business was even harder. As much as he knew his father would want him to be happy, letting go of something that his old man had put that much of himself into was turning out to be harder than he thought it would be. Simone had started taking bites from buyers, and there had been a few good offers, but AJ had turned them all down for one reason or another, reasons that he thought were valid ones. But Jolene and Simone had both suggested that maybe he wasn’t as ready to give up the business as he had thought and part of him couldn’t help but wonder if they were right.