Sarah and Solomon

by Roberta Kagan

  “A doll? You want to waste your money on doll? Are you crazy?”

  “I might be crazy. But I need a doll for my baby sister.”

  “That should be pretty easy, but it sure is a waste of money, don’t you think?”

  “Of course it is. Don’t you think I know that? But . . .” Solomon looked back at Sarah, who was watching him with wide eyes. “Get it for me anyway.”

  “You want to pay? What do I care? I’ll get you a doll. Meet me here tomorrow night. After dark, say eleven?”

  “I’ll be here,” Solomon said.

  Chapter 2

  Ludwig Beck wiped the sweat from his brow on the sleeve of his green uniform. He was glad the sun was rising and his shift would soon be over. I should be grateful to have a job, and at least I’m not fighting on the front lines, he reminded himself as he did each morning before he finished patrolling the Lodz ghetto. When the father of his girlfriend, Hedy, had gotten him this job working for the Ordnungspolizei, or better known as the Grüne Polizei, he had no idea he was going to work all night to make sure that sick and filthy Jews did not escape the ghetto. This place was foul, and his work here was a far cry from what he’d originally hoped for when he joined the party and became involved with Hedy Keller. Ludwig had envisioned himself walking through the streets wearing the starched black uniform and shiny boots of the SS, commanding respect. But that was not the case.

  It was a beautiful sunrise. The sky was clear, crystal blue, like sapphire. Making his final walk-through for the night, he tripped on something as he strolled along the edge where the wall and barbed wire kept the prisoners from daring to leave. When Ludwig looked down he saw the strangest thing, a doll. A torn and dirty rag doll. A child would dare to come this close to the edge of the ghetto? he thought as he bent down to look more closely. And as he did, he spotted a small hole in the wall, just large enough for a child to push through. Why haven’t I see this before? he thought, but he knew why. It was because he made a habit of not looking at anything too closely. If he had his way, he would just count the hours until the end of his shift and then collect his pay. He was not interested in heroics. At least not until now.

  Chapter 3

  Ludwig stuffed the doll into his jacket and left the ghetto. As he boarded the bus, he felt self-conscious wondering if anyone noticed the bulge in his breast pocket. But no one paid any attention. The morning commute was filled with workers who had their own concerns. He took a seat alone in the back and rode quietly until the vehicle arrived at his stop. Once he left the bus, he walked for almost a mile to the small flat where Hedy lived. Technically, they were not living together, but he stayed with her much more than he stayed at home with his parents and sister.

  Quietly, he turned the key in the lock and went inside. Expecting Hedy to be asleep, he sat down on the sofa and began to remove his shoes.

  “I’m glad you're home,” Hedy said, walking out of the bedroom.

  “What are you doing up so early?”

  “I had a terrible nightmare. I dreamed that you were shot.”

  “I’m here,” he said as she ran into his arms.

  “What is this?” She felt the bulge in his jacket and reached inside. “It’s a doll? It’s filthy. Do dolls and other inanimate objects carry lice?”

  “I don’t know,” he admitted.

  “Why, pray tell, do you have a doll?” she said, cocking her head.

  “I found it by the wall of the ghetto.”

  “And you brought it home? Why would you ever do that? It’s probably filled with lice. You should have put it right in the trash.”

  “I have a dilemma. Maybe we can talk about it? The truth is I don’t know what to do.” Ludwig shook his head. He gazed at Hedy. She wasn’t his dream girl by any means. They’d met in the Hitler Youth program at a campout last summer. She liked him right away. He was not as taken with her. It wasn’t that she was ugly—she wasn’t. But no one would have called her a great beauty either with her long honey-colored curls that she wore in braids on either side of her head and her strong, stocky build. When his family met her, his mother referred to her as a sturdy and stable girl, the kind of girl who makes for a good wife. It didn’t hurt that Hedy’s father had friends in the Grüne Polizei, the green police, and when they became engaged after a short courtship, he’d helped Ludwig to secure this job. It paid well enough for Ludwig to help his family out a little, and for that reason his parents thought the marriage was a wonderful idea.

  “Talk to me. Tell me what is bothering you, liebhaber,” she said. She’d taken to calling him lover lately.

  “You know how I like to keep to myself and not get in the middle of things, right? As I have told you before, sometimes when people get involved in things that don’t concern them in the ghetto, they can end up in trouble.”

  “Yes, I know. You’ve said this many times.”

  “Well, this doll was lying right next to an opening in the wall that was large enough for a child to get out. And I think this child may have escaped.”

  She shrugged her shoulders. “Would anyone be the wiser?"

  “I don’t know. If today were a normal day, I would say no. But today is the roundup.”

  “Oh yes, I remember you mentioning this. Isn’t this when they are taking all of the children on a transport?”

  “Yes, they are going to be exterminated, but the prisoners don’t know that. They are sending their children off.”

  “Nasty business,” she said. “Would a single child make that much of a difference?” Hedy asked, lighting a cigarette.

  “Perhaps. There is a ten-thousand-person quota that must be met.”

  “Ten thousand? One probably wouldn’t make any difference. Do you want a smoke?” she asked.

  He nodded and took a cigarette and lit it. “I don’t know how many got out. Maybe just this one.”

  “Yes, maybe. But . . .”

  “Yes?” he asked.

  She paused for a moment inhaling a long, deep puff of smoke then she continued. “I was thinking. You know how you have been hoping for a promotion? And we’ve talked so much about how we would be happier and able to spend more time together if you were able to get off the night shift?” she said.

  He nodded.

  “Well, what if you could find these missing little rats and turn them in. Wouldn’t that make you quite the hero? Then perhaps we would have some leverage to ask for favors.”

  He bit his lower lip and considered her question. “If there are several of these children, then yes, it might be possible.”

  “Even if there is only one. You will still have made quite the impression on your superiors having gone out of your way to uphold the law.”

  “Yes, that’s true. But it somehow feels wrong to be hunting children.”

  “Does it? Think of them as demons, little Jews waiting to grow up to be big Jews. Besides, the one who escaped or the one who plotted the escape, must be a cunning little beast. Just imagine what she could be capable of doing to our beloved fatherland if she were allowed to grow up. Better to rid the world of these vermin while they’re small. Don’t you agree?”

  He nodded.

  “Then it’s settled. You must find a way to hunt them down and return them to their captors.”

  Chapter 4

  The following day, Solomon left Sarah hiding under the stairs in the back of an apartment building. “I’ll be back as soon as I can. Don’t move. Don’t talk to anyone. Stay here and stay out of sight.”

  “I’m scared. I want to go back to Mama,” Sarah moaned.

  “We can’t,” Solomon said. He was tired and annoyed. “I’m hungry too.”

  “I know. Here, take the food Mama gave us, and eat some of the bread.”

  “What about you?”

  “Don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine,” Solomon said, taking off his jacket with the yellow star on it.

  “You can’t walk around without the star on your clothes. You’ll get in trouble.”


  “Don’t you worry about me. Now do what I told you, Sarah,” Solomon said as he slipped out from under the stairwell and began strolling leisurely. The main thing is to look as if I belong here, he told himself. I must act as if I’m just a Polish kid walking down the street. The worst I can be accused of is skipping school, and nobody will bother with that.

  He walked into a used clothing store and scanned the little girls’ coats and dresses. Hating to part with the money, but knowing it was very necessary that Sarah must not be wearing anything with a gold star, he picked up the cheapest dress he could find and an inexpensive but warm coat he thought would fit. Then he went up to the woman at the counter and smiled. In his most charming voice, he said, “It’s my sister’s birthday. I want so badly to buy her a gift, but I don’t have much money. Can I perhaps wash the windows here at your store in trade for these two small pieces of clothing? My little sister doesn’t have a nice church dress, and I think she would love these.” Solomon thought about removing the yellow stars from their clothes, but he was afraid that there would be a discoloration in the fabric where the stars had been, and it could give them away. He decided it was better if he were able to get his hands on new clothes.

  The woman at the counter looked at the items and then at the boy. She looked to be in her late thirties. Solomon assumed she was probably a mother because she smiled at him, and when she did, it reminded him of his own mother. “Yes, all right. These aren’t worth much. Go on. The windows are very dirty.”

  “Thank you so very much, ma'am.”

  Solomon washed the windows, and when he finished, the woman wrapped his package in brown paper. “I hope she enjoys her gifts,” she said.

  “I know she will, and thank you again for your kindness.”

  After Solomon left the clothing store, he grabbed an apple from the cart of a street vendor, who was busy selling to another customer. He tucked it into his jacket, then as soon as he turned the corner, he took it out and bit into the sweet, juicy flesh. I sure am hungry, he thought as he continued walking. An old woman was selling used pots. He gave her a sweet smile and asked where the Catholic church was located.

  “You’re not from around here?” she asked.

  He was suddenly afraid that he’d made a terrible error. Why had he been so dumb as to ask a stranger for help? She could turn him in easily. Solomon thought about running away, but that would only cause her to be more suspicious. He’d talked to the men from the black market about their religion. Sometimes he’d heard them mention going to confession. “I’m not from Lodz,” he said. “You see, I’m from the country. I’ve come to Lodz to visit my aunt who is sick, but I wanted to go and see a priest to do a confession.”

  “A confession? How old are you? What could a child your age possibly need to confess?”

  “I’m small for my age. I’m actually fourteen. And I need to see a priest. It’s about a girl.”

  “Oh.” The woman turned red in the face. “Turn right at the corner and walk two blocks then turn left. You’ll see the church.”

  “Thank you, ma'am.”

  The truth was Solomon was big for his age. He took after his father in that way. He was only nine but could pass for a young-looking fourteen with his broad shoulders and already developing muscles. And as far as girls were concerned, he might be only nine, but he had an idea of what went on between a boy and a girl. After all, he’d had a few clumsy encounters with older girls. Nothing really to speak of, a kiss here, a squeeze of the breast there. But enough for him to know that there was a world beyond the innocence of childhood. And when he was talking to that woman who was selling the pots, he sensed that alluding to that world of men and women and sex would embarrass her enough to make her want to get away from him and the conversation as quickly as possible. His instincts had been correct. Solomon smiled a half smile as he walked toward the church.

  Being forced onto the streets at a young age had not been easy. At first the older men who he worked with in the black market took advantage of him. They laughed at him and took his money delivering insufficient or low-grade goods which he’d been hard pressed to sell for enough cash to buy more. However, he’d found ways to stay in the business. He’d also learned their slang, never letting them know that he understood what they were doing when they were making a deal. And as time passed, they learned to respect him, and then they even learned to like him.

  Solomon entered the church and walked around. He’d never been inside a church before. But he had heard the Polish men from the underground mention that they had been to confession, so he knew that if anyone asked what he was doing there, he could say he needed to see a priest to confess even though he had no idea what that might entail. The main room inside the church was large with beautiful polished wood benches and a stained glass window that reflected an array of colors on the wood floor. It reminded Solomon of the synagogue he had gone to on high holidays before the Nazis had imprisoned him and his family in the ghetto. He didn’t miss going to synagogue. He’d never cared much for religion.

  No one bothered him as he walked through the rooms. He was hoping to find a store inside the church that sold a necklace with a cross hanging from it that he could purchase. But he found nothing. He sat down on the bench and sighed. I’ll have to talk to Wiktor or Majec and ask them if they can find me a cheap cross pendant. As he stood up to leave, a man wearing a black robe came out from a back room.

  “Hello, my son,” he said.

  Must be the priest, Solomon thought. Then he answered, “Good afternoon.”

  “How can I help you?”

  “I don’t know if you can.” Solomon smiled. “It’s my mother’s birthday. And she’s been very ill. My father is afraid she is dying. She sold her gold cross to buy food for our family, and now she doesn’t have one anymore. And I want her to have one in case . . .”

  “You mean her rosary?”

  “Yes,” Solomon said, not sure what a rosary was. But he hoped this was what he was looking for.

  “Maybe I can help. Wait here.”

  The priest returned a few minutes later, carrying a small necklace of beads with a cross hanging from the end.

  “How much do I owe you, sir?”

  “Take it as a gift. Perhaps it will give your mother peace in her time of need.”

  “Many thanks to you, sir.”

  “God be with you, my son,” the priest said as Solomon left the church.

  A rosary, he called it. I’ll wear it as a necklace. I’ll use it to identify me as a Catholic. Now I just have to find out what this thing is actually used for.

  When Solomon returned to the alley where he’d left Sarah, he found her huddled under the stairs red eyed and sucking her thumb. “Hi there,” he whispered to her softly. “Are you all right?”

  “I was scared. I didn’t know if you’d ever come back. I wanted to run back to Mama, but I didn’t remember how to get back, and even if I could find the way, I was afraid to go through that crack in the wall that you pushed me through last night.” She was mad at him. He could see it in her eyes, which were so bloodshot from crying that it made him feel sick with guilt to look at her.

  “I’m glad you didn’t leave.” He wanted to reassure her. “I promised you I’d be back, and here I am. Now I know you think of me as your older brother, and you don’t always like to obey me, but it’s important that you do as I ask at least for right now. You can’t ever go back through that crack in the wall. Do you understand me?” His voice was tender and caring.

  She nodded. He gently put his hands on her shoulders and looked into her eyes, then he continued to speak. “Sarah, I will always take care of you if you will only let me. But you must listen to me carefully and do whatever I say.”

  “I don’t have to.” She struggled to get away from him. He held her shoulders gently but firmly.

  “Sarah. I love you. I know that you think I am being bossy. But I’m not. I’m trying to protect us. Please, promise me you will do as I ask.�
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  She scoffed but she nodded.

  “Good.” He smiled. “So did you have something to eat?”

  “No.” She shook her head. “I couldn’t eat.”

  “Let’s have a little bread now. Would you like that?”

  She nodded.

  He’d eaten the apple he stole, but it had hardly made a dent in his empty stomach. Solomon was growing fast and because of this he was always hungry. Most nights he dreamed of food. And there were times he wanted to throw caution to the wind and gobble every last morsel they had. But he knew he was on his own. No one was going to help them. So even as his stomach growled, he knew he had to make the food last as long as possible. Saliva generated in his mouth as he ripped off a nice-sized piece of bread for Sarah and then a small one for himself. “Eat this,” he said.

  “You should take the bigger one,” she said.

  He kissed the top of her head. “I had an apple. That one is for you.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Absolutely sure.” He smiled at her. She smiled back.

  “Don’t ever leave me alone. Don’t ever go away on a transport. Promise me you’ll always come back and get me. Promise me,” she said.

  “I won’t leave you.”

  “Do you promise?”

  “I promise,” he said, taking a deep breath hoping it was true, hoping he wouldn’t be arrested and taken away leaving her alone. But he said nothing. Instead, he forced a reassuring smile. “Here, take these clothes and put them on.”

  “Where did you get these?” she asked.

  “I worked for them.”

  “Today?”

  “Yes, today, Sarah. Please stop asking so many questions. I’m tired. Just put them on . . . please?”

  “Turn around and don’t look, all right?” she said.

  “Of course. I promise not to look. Just put on the clothes.”

  Chapter 5

  That night Solomon took Sarah with him when he went to meet with Wiktor. It was an inconvenience to have her tagging along that made negotiating deals tougher, but he dared not leave her alone under the stairwell at night. Anything could happen. When they arrived at the meeting spot, Solomon let out his bird call, but there was no answer. A full hour passed before Solomon heard the bird call returned. Cautiously, he answered with the same call.