Karma's a Killer

by Tracy Weber

“I knew this charlatan wasn’t here today to rescue an animal, but I had no idea she was with you.” Sally moved the gun away from Rene’s scalp, pointed it at my chest, and shoved Rene toward me. “Get over there with your friend while I figure out what to do with the two of you.”

  I didn’t take my eyes off the gun. “Are you okay, Rene?”

  “I’m fine.” Her voice sounded small. “I’m so sorry. She caught me on the way to the bathroom. She threatened to shoot me if I said anything. I didn’t know how to warn you.”

  I tried to play dumb, which at the moment wasn’t all that much of a stretch. “Sally, why are you pointing a gun at us? We’re not burglars. My friend wanted to look at the cats again. We stopped by to see if you were still open. The door was unlocked, so we came inside.”

  Rene pasted on a fake smile. “That’s right. I just wanted a kitten.”

  “Oh please. You’re not fooling anyone. I overheard you two talking in here.”

  If playing dumb didn’t work, maybe acting assertive would. I grabbed Rene’s trembling hand, stood tall, and stiffened my body in pretend indignation.

  “I have no idea what you’re talking about, but Rene and I are leaving.”

  Sally shifted the gun’s aim from my chest to Rene’s belly. “You’re not going anywhere. And if you don’t shut up, I’ll shoot your friend here in the stomach.”

  As threats went, it was surprisingly effective. Rene gasped and covered her belly with her hands. I pulled her behind me and backed us both into the desk.

  Sally kept talking. “Looks like luck is finally with me. I’m not normally here this time of night, but my husband had a setback today. I had to spend most of the evening at the rehab center. I stopped by on my way home to check on the animals and saw that someone had turned on a light in the office. The volunteers never work afterhours, and Maggie barely stops by even when we’re open. I thought we might have an intruder, so I decided I’d better be safe and bring in my gun. And wouldn’t you know? I was right. I found you.”

  She held the gun alarmingly steady in one hand as she gestured with the other. “But what should I do now? One gunshot, I could explain. I could tell the cops that you were burglarizing the rescue and I shot in self defense. But two?” She paused as if considering it, then shook her head. “No, that will never work.”

  She started pacing. “This whole situation is Maggie’s fault. If she had done right by me, no one would have been hurt. I’ve worked my butt off helping to set up and run DogMa. Maggie barely paid me half of what I was worth, but I didn’t mind. My husband had a good job and rescue is love-work, you know?” She shrugged. “Then Frank got sick. I asked Maggie for a raise, but she wouldn’t give it to me. She said that she needed all of the money to help the animals. I care about the animals, too, but shouldn’t humans be more important?”

  The question seemed absurd, coming from the lips of a murderer, but I didn’t point that out. I bought time by stating the obvious.

  “You stole money from DogMa to pay your husband’s medical bills.”

  “It wasn’t stealing. The money I took should have been mine in the first place. Most of it, anyway.”

  Rene shifted behind me. Sally kept talking.

  “At first I only took a few hundred dollars. No one noticed, so I took a few hundred more. Then a few thousand … ” Her voice trailed off.

  “How much have you taken?”

  She shrugged. “Enough to make a difference, at least to me. The animals weren’t hurt. It helped them, in a way. Every time I told Maggie that we were running out of money, she managed to find a creative way to get more. She never would have noticed the missing funds.”

  “But Raven did, and she blackmailed you.” Granted, I was guessing, but what did I have to lose?

  “Wrong answer, genius. Raven thought Maggie was taking the money—that she’d started gambling again. She figured all she needed to do to get back in her grandmother’s good graces was find proof of it. She asked me to get it for her.”

  Rene poked me in the back. I ignored her and tried to keep Sally talking.

  “How did Raven find out about the missing money in the first place?”

  “It was so stupid. All of our electronic records are backed up online. I never thought about Raven still having the passwords. She’d been gone over a year when that awful old woman cut her out of the will. How was I supposed to know that Raven would blame Maggie for that?”

  “So Raven snooped through DogMa’s online records hoping to find dirt on Maggie?”

  “Bingo. And she noticed my, shall we say, creative accounting. She called me a few weeks ago, convinced that Maggie was gambling again and I was covering it up. I denied it, of course. I thought I’d convinced her. Then she and her band of crazies showed up in Seattle.”

  “How did you get her to meet you at Green Lake that night?”

  “I didn’t. She called me Saturday afternoon and demanded that I meet her on that stupid dock at eleven-thirty. She had a big gash on her forehead when I got there, and she seemed a little dazed, but it sure didn’t shut up her mouth any. She told me that if I wouldn’t help her take down Maggie, she’d destroy DogMa. Turns out the protest was her way of threatening me. I realized that even if I refused to help her, she’d eventually find an auditor who would.” Sally shrugged. “The real reason for the missing money would have come out. I couldn’t let that happen.”

  She paused. When she spoke again, her voice sounded regretful. “Killing Raven was surprisingly easy. But you? I kind of liked you, Kate.”

  I had a very bad feeling about her use of the past tense.

  “And I certainly never wanted to kill a pregnant woman.”

  I instinctively leaned into Rene, as if body contact would make me a more effective shield.

  “You don’t have to hurt us,” I said. “This can end here.”

  “No, it can’t. I can’t go to prison. Who will take care of my husband when he gets out of rehab?” Her jaw hardened. “Sorry, ladies.”

  My mind spun, looking for options. There was no Bella locked in the bathroom to save us this time. Yoga might help keep me focused, but my fiercest Warrior Pose couldn’t compete with a gun. I considered reaching for my cell phone to call 911, but there was no way I could get to it without Sally seeing.

  I tried bargaining. “Sally, you’ve dedicated your life to taking care of the vulnerable. You don’t want to harm Rene’s babies. Let her go. She won’t say anything.” Rene squirmed behind me.

  “Nice try, Kate. I’m sorry, but your friend has to die too. I promise, it will be euthanasia. Quick and painless.”

  Rene poked my low back with her index finger, over and over and over again. She wanted me to do something, but what?

  “Kate, stop leaning on me. You’re squishing my bladder.” She looked up at Sally. “I really have to pee.”

  I had no idea what Rene was up to, but I assumed she wanted me to get out of her way. I took two steps forward, toward Sally. “Let her go to the bathroom.”

  Sally waved the gun at me and sneered. “Not a chance.”

  Which was precisely the distraction Rene had been waiting for.

  She threw her gloves in Sally’s face, screamed a primal “AAAGH,” and charged her. I dove for the gun. Rene smashed Sally across the forehead with the golden-retriever-shaped paperweight she’d snagged from the desktop.

  Sally staggered, but she managed to stay upright and hold onto the gun. She pushed me aside and shoved Rene into the desk—hard. Rene crashed into it, let out a gut-wrenching moan, and fell to the floor.

  Everything next seemed to happen in an impossible fast-forward slow-motion.

  Sally whipped around and pointed her gun at Rene’s prostrate form. The door opened. The room went black. A body flew through the air. Screams, a sickening thud, and the sound of metal skidding across hardwood ripped through
my eardrums.

  I couldn’t see what was happening—much less try to stop it—so I ran to the door and turned on the light. When my eyes adjusted, I saw Rene curled up in a side-lying fetal position next to the desk. A fierce-looking Dale pinned Sally to the ground. He gestured with his chin across the room.

  “Pick up that gun. Now.”

  Surprise opened my mouth and spewed out a stupid question. “What are you doing here?”

  “Apparently keeping you two idiots from getting killed. I called as soon as I got your message, but you didn’t answer, so I came here to stop you before you did something stupid. Obviously, I didn’t get here fast enough.”

  Rene groaned. Her face had turned an alarming shade of gray.

  “Could you guys fight about this later? I might need an ambulance.”

  I kneeled beside her. “Are you okay?”

  “Something happened when I hit the desk.” She curled into herself and groaned. “I think I’m having contractions.”

  My entire body flashed cold. “Hang on, sweetie. I’ll be right back.” I grabbed the phone off the desk and dialed 911. My best friend looked up at me with wild, frightened eyes.

  “Kate, the girls. It’s too early.”

  I stayed on the line long enough to make sure that both the police and an ambulance were coming, then dropped the receiver onto the desk, scrambled back to Rene, and waited for what felt like a thousand years for help to arrive. Dale restrained a vehemently swearing Sally;

  I huddled on the floor next to Rene. She squeezed my fingers so hard, I thought she might break them.

  “Everything’s going to be okay,” I whispered. “I promise.”

  Sweat dotted Rene’s forehead. “See, Kate. I’m not useless. I saved us.”

  I held back the tears threatening my eyes. “Yes, sweetie, you did. You saved us. And I swear, as soon as you’re ready, I’m getting you a puppy.”

  Rene gave me a wan smile. “The girls would love a dog, but only if we find one that Bella likes. I’m her puppy sitter.”

  Sally stopped struggling long enough to snarl, “You’re both nuts.”

  Rene groaned and hugged her belly again. “Please call Sam. I need him to come home now.”

  The police arrived first, followed a few seconds later by the paramedics. I stayed at Rene’s side and muttered empty assurances while they hooked up an IV, lifted her onto a stretcher, and rolled her out to the ambulance. While they secured her inside of it, I gave Dale my house keys and the note with the car’s location.

  “Bella is inside a red Camaro at this address. Please go get her for me. I’m going to the hospital with Rene.”

  A uniformed police officer stopped me before I could climb in. “I’m sorry, ma’am. You’ll have to stay here. I need to ask you some questions.”

  The growl that emerged from my throat was so fierce, I couldn’t believe that it came from within me. “If you want to keep me out of that ambulance, you’d damned well better call the SWAT team.”

  A paramedic yelled from inside. “If you’re coming with us, you ride up front. Either way, make up your mind. We’re leaving. Now.”

  The officer hesitated a beat, then nodded. “I’ll talk to you later.”

  I climbed into the ambulance, closed my eyes, and prayed for my friend. The sirens carried us into the darkness.

  Twenty-Four

  The next two weeks passed in what felt like a heartbeat. In a weird series of events, the world changed, yet stayed oddly the same. Sally replaced Dharma in the King County Jail. Rene was checked into the hospital; Michael’s father recovered enough to go home. I got my car back the same day Sam forbade me to drive his.

  Who was I to question the laws of the universe? I was just happy we were all still alive.

  Today was a new day. A day of beginnings.

  The sun poured between white puffy clouds and melted my shoulders. Playground laughter drowned out the sounds of my inner demons. The smell of freshly cut grass evoked my favorite mantra: arriving home. I walked underneath the Greenwood Park sign, faced the wide expanse of green lawn, and lifted the small cardboard box as if offering its contents to the universe.

  Dharma rubbed Bella’s ears and smiled. “Are you ready?”

  “Not yet. Give me a minute.”

  If the scratching and cooing coming from inside the box was any indication, Mister Feathers was eager to escape his dark prison. I knew I should simply release him and move on with my day, but letting that pigeon go seemed important. As if in liberating him, I would somehow free myself.

  I closed my eyes, took a deep breath, and prepared to lift the lid. “Okay, buddy. Welcome to your new home.”

  Mister Feathers flapped his wings and was gone in an instant. He flew off into the distance, leaving the home I’d chosen for him far behind. I felt unaccountably sad. What had I expected? A thank you? A final circle overhead? A coo of farewell?

  Dharma placed her hand on my shoulder. “Come on, let’s head back.”

  We made small talk while Bella led us back to the yoga studio. “How was your visit today with your friend?” Dharma asked.

  “Rene? She’s feeling a lot better, especially now that the doctors got the contractions to stop. She’s driving the nurses crazy, though. They’ve started a wager to see which of them quits first.”

  Dharma grinned. “She seems like quite a character.”

  “Believe me, there’s no one else like her. I don’t know how any of us will survive if she needs to be on bed rest much longer. The hospital food is killing her. She says if she doesn’t get more sugar in her diet soon, her teeth will fall out. I smuggle in sweets when I can, but Sam’s like the junk food police. He even searched my purse this morning.”

  “It could be worse.”

  “How’s that?”

  “You could both be eating jail food.”

  I smiled. “So true. Thank goodness Maggie didn’t press burglary charges. With my luck, Rene would have been my cellmate. But at least she’s found something to occupy her time in the hospital.”

  “What?”

  “She’s creating an infant accessory line. Some of her designs are truly awful, but the Baby Vampire line is kind of cute.”

  Dharma raised her eyebrows.

  I shrugged. “I guess you have to see it. Nothing could be worse than her Baby Yogi line. I mean, really. Who puts the om symbol on diapers?”

  We walked in silence to the end of the block before I said, “Hey, did I tell you that one of the nurses got approval for me to offer in-room yoga in the hospital’s perinatal unit?”

  “Can women on bed rest do yoga?”

  “It has to be modified, but yes. Pranayama and meditation for sure. It helps keep hospitalized moms balanced and calm. Plus, it will give me an excuse to visit Rene.”

  We turned left and walked down 90th Street toward Greenwood Avenue.

  “I have my own news,” Dharma said. “You’ll have one less house guest starting tomorrow.”

  I forced my expression to remain neutral. “You’re leaving? It’s only been two weeks. If the couch is too uncomfortable, Michael and I could invest in a guest bed.”

  “Where would you put it? Michael’s junk is everywhere. I swear, Kate, I’ve seen mountain gorillas with better housekeeping skills than that man.”

  “I could ask him to clean up, but it wouldn’t do much good.” I shrugged. “We are who we are.” Bella stopped to sniff the ground near a freshly composted pea patch.

  “Honestly, Kate, that’s not the problem,” Dharma said. “I’ve loved the time I’ve spent with you two. But it’s time for me to go.”

  The pain inside me felt deep, much deeper than warranted considering how little I knew Dharma. But like Michael—like me, for that matter—Dharma could only be who she was. Her leaving had very little to do with me and everything to do wi
th her. Maybe that was why it hurt so much.

  “Are you heading back to California?” I didn’t want to get my hopes up, but if Dharma stayed in the States, we might strengthen the tenuous bond we were forming.

  “No. There’s nothing for me there. Not in Texas, either. There never was.”

  I looked away to hide my disappointment. “Out of the country again, then.”

  I heard a smile in Dharma’s voice. “More like out in the country. I’m moving to Orcas Island to learn about goats.”

  I froze, feeling simultaneously confused, horrified, and—oddly enough—pleased.

  “You and Dale? An item? When did that happen?”

  Dharma shrugged. “I wouldn’t call us an item. Dale has an empty room and he needs help. I need a fresh start.” She wiggled her eyebrows. “I have to admit, though, he is kind of cute. I’ve always been attracted to men with facial hair.”

  I shuddered in spite of myself.

  “Dale’s a good man. Stable, yet uninhibited. After your father, I never thought I’d settle down with any man, much less some pretend country bumpkin. But who knows? At least with Dale, I’d be dating someone age-appropriate.”

  Now that I’d had a full twenty seconds to think about it, the match, if it happened, made a weird kind of sense. Dale had a habit of rescuing things, animals and people included. In this case, Dharma might rescue him back. Even better, Orcas was less than four hours away. Dharma and I could visit each other several times a year.

  Bella abandoned her scent trail. We turned left and started walking the final four blocks down Greenwood Avenue.

  “You’re seeing a counselor now, right?” Dharma asked.

  I nodded my head yes.

  “Perhaps I will, too. I need to do something to help with the guilt.”

  “Guilt?”

  “Over Raven’s death.”

  “Dharma, you didn’t kill her. Sally did.”

  Dharma shuddered, so subtly that I almost missed it. “I didn’t hold Raven’s head under the water, but I’m certainly not innocent. If I hadn’t confronted her—if she hadn’t hit her head when we fought—she might have been strong enough to fight off Sally.”