Sedona Law 3

by Dave Daren

  “No, I want to help her with her asylum application,” she said.

  “I think she’s got bigger problems than that right now,” I said.

  “Putting the mansion on the market is about eight months into your two-year plan,” she said.

  “Yeah,” I said. “But eliminating payroll is in the first month.”

  “We need to help her,” she said.

  I knew Vicki was right, but we had so much going on already.

  “Can we think about it?” I asked.

  “Okay,” she said.

  “Great,” I said. “Now let’s get into the business of the blue pickup, red trailer at the Denny’s in Holbrook.”

  My phone buzzed. It was Manuel.

  “Hey,” I said. “How’s it going?”

  “The zookeepers from Tuscson are here,” he said. “They are coming to pick up the animals now.”

  “Now?” I asked. “They never gave us a time.”

  “I know,” he said. “They said they had to get approval, and it would depend on when it came through. It came through, so now they can pick them up.”

  I raised my arms in triumph. “This is excellent news. We need to get these animals out of here. I’m on my way.” I got off the phone and grabbed my bag. “They’re coming to pick up the animals now,” I said.

  “Now?” Vicki said.

  “Now,” I said. “No more tigers or giraffes. Only the zebra.”

  “Oh, you mean the one that is currently missing?” AJ said.

  I smirked at her, and she laughed.

  “Didn’t I tell you this morning to find that zebra?” I snapped my fingers. “Chop, chop.”

  “No, that was yesterday,” she laughed. “And you said to find the asshole, not the zebra. And I came pretty close.”

  Vicki laughed and mimed a joint smoking gesture. “Getting high on that power trip over there, Henry?”

  “What?” I said. “I am not on a power trip.”

  She repeated the gesture. “Is it a nice buzz? ‘Yes, Mr. Irving,’ ‘No, Mr. Irving,’” she said in a mocking tone.

  I shook my head and laughed. “You’re ridiculous, Vic. I am so not on a power trip. AJ, back me up here.”

  AJ cleared her throat and suddenly seemed really interested in her computer. Vicki died laughing.

  “That’s it,” I said. “You guys are both fired.”

  I turned and headed out the door, and they laughed harder. I went out to the mansion and this time drove the perimeter to see if I could find this back gate. It actually wasn’t too hard to find. I just had to turn off the main road and wander around in the desert for a few minutes until I saw the giraffe heads poking out.

  I pulled up to a red gate that matched the one in the front and led to a dirt road on the other side. I had to call Manuel to come let me in, and he showed up in the golf cart fairly quickly. I drove into the property and realized I was at the back of the zoo, right on the side of the zebra pen.

  If the thief had a key, or knew someone inside, they could just pull right up to the zebra pen. As long as they could get the zebra into the trailer, they could drive right back out on the main road without being detected. The only problem might be if a motorist could see the zebra inside the trailer. But if it were late at night, depending on the design of the trailer, they would be able to get out completely undetected.

  Manuel showed me where to park. It was an open dirt area with a couple of other vehicles.

  “How many people have a key to that gate?” I asked Manuel as soon as I got out.

  He shrugged. “I don’t know. Everybody, I guess.”

  I cocked my head in agreement. Elena had given me the same answer, verbatim.

  “There is no list or record of who has that key?” I asked.

  Manuel looked at me blankly. “No. Some people have keys. Like Shannon, Gareth, and Daphne, and Olaf, and Ashley and--”

  “Wait, who are Olaf and Ashley?” I asked.

  “Olaf is Shannon’s... boyfriend. Sometimes they are together, sometimes they are not, who knows. Then, Ashley is Gareth’s, uh... how do you say it…”

  “Girlfriend?” I suggested.

  Manuel looked embarrassed and shook his head. “No, it’s… there’s a word... ah... baby mama.”

  I laughed. “Gareth has a baby mama?”

  “Yeah,” he said. “They have a four-year-old son. They live in Montana, but they come back and forth to visit Mr O’Brien, and see the animals. But lots and lots of people have that key.”

  “I see,” I said. I was getting the picture that there was no way to trace who did or didn’t have a key.

  “The zookeepers are here?” I asked.

  “Yeah,” he said and hopped on the golf cart. “I will take you down there.”

  The tiger enclosure was just a few yards down from here, and I saw the blue semi-truck parked in front of it.

  We arrived at the enclosure, and there were now about six or seven zookeepers from the Tucson team all running around, coordinating. Manuel and I stood around for a few minutes until they needed his help to open the tiger gate.

  I stood on the sidelines and watched them prepare the truck for a while. The zookeepers were all outside the truck with a long contraption made of two wooden crates and a tunnel made of wire caging. They put meat on the far end, to entice the animal, and I guessed it had a trapping mechanism that would close it at some point. There were two contraptions, one for each tiger.

  It took all of them to take the cages into the enclosure. I guessed that was so that if one got eaten, all the others could watch? I didn’t know. So they set the traps up and then went outside the enclosure. Then they moved to the giraffe enclosure.

  It occured to me that this could be a very, very long ordeal, and I caught up with Manuel.

  “Hey,” I said. “It looks like it’s going to be a while, huh?”

  “Yeah,” he said. “These things take time. Maybe two or three hours, I think?”

  “Okay,” I said. “I’m going to up to the house and get some work done. Call me if you need me.”

  “Sure thing,” he said. “I’d do the same thing if I were you.”

  I glanced back over the project and, satisfied that everyone was reasonably occupied, I hiked the quarter mile to the house. This wasn’t particularly advisable in my business attire, and I reminded myself I had to start loosening up the way I dressed if I was going to spend much more time the mansion.

  I got back up to the house, and given the gorgeous spring weather, I sat on the deck and got on my phone. With all the leads we were getting on the zebra, I knew it was time to call Bloodhound Bill.

  William Flannigan was the toughest bounty hunter and tracker in this part of the state, but you wouldn’t have it known it from when we went to high school together. Back in those days he was a gangly kid with frizzy red hair that reached his waist. He wore tie-dyed t-shirts and protested everything, from war to civil liberties and women’s rights.

  Now he had grown into a meaty, muscular cowboy type. He looked like he stepped out of a Roy Rogers movie with his plaid shirts, huge cowboy hats, and double gun slinging holster. The first time I ran into him after being back, he was in a bar fight.

  Later, once I remembered who he was, I distinctly recalled him standing outside a supermarket, earnestly waving a “Peace Now,” sign at the passersby. But he had really helped out with Harmony’s case, so I figured he actually might be of use here, but I was going to have to frame this just the right way.

  “Hello?” Bill’s gravelly voice answered.

  “Bill,” I said. “Henry Irving, how’s it going?”

  “Irving,” he said, and his voice was full of sleep. I glanced at the phone screen. Really? It was two o’clock in the afternoon. “Long time, no see. How’s it going?”

  “Good, Bill,” I said. “How did it ever go with the network executive?”

  After his help with Harmony’s case, he had asked me to set him up with a representative to talk about h
is idea for a pilot. After some finagling, I found someone at The Western Channel that would meet with him. It was a long shot. A really, really long shot, but I figured I’d let career Darwinism run its course.

  “It went well,” he said. “Kinda hard to tell with those Hollywood types.”

  “I know what you mean,” I said. “The masters of spin.”

  He shrugged. “I’ve got another meeting next month. We’ll see how it goes.”

  “Really?” I asked. “Great for you.”

  “Yeah,” he said. “Couldn’t have done it without you. What can I do ya for?”

  I chose my words carefully. “I got a job for you.”

  “Oh, yeah?” His voice perked up. “Who do you need me to find? Name anyone. I can chase ‘em down.”

  “Yeah,” I said. “You want to meet me for drinks later?”

  “Sure,” he agreed “Slinger’s Saloon tonight?”

  “See you there,” I replied and disconnected the call.

  I finished up the donation of the animals and was relieved to see them finally go. I saw the semis out of the back gate. Now all we had to deal with was one zebra, albeit one that was missing.

  I checked my phone and saw that Vicki had texted me three times.

  I was late for dinner.

  I met Vicki et al. at a southwest themed restaurant in the art district. My parents had picked it. It was one of their favorites.

  The place was called Adobe and was a peach colored concrete building designed to look like an old style clay house. When I walked up, the generic salsa music was already piped outside and set the tone for the perfectly un-authentic authentic Mexican experience I was about to embark upon.

  My party had already arrived, and I spotted them quickly at a circular table with a black, red, and orange patterned tablecloth with a glass topper.

  My parents sat on one side. My mother wore a Boho ankle skirt, a beaded and fringed blouse, and had her long hair wrapped in a scarf updo, showing off long, dangly earrings. My dad wore jeans and a black t-shirt with that simply had the words LEGALIZE IT. The shirt had no direct subject to it, and just advocated the legalization of... everything.

  Joowon and Seoyon next to them dressed in khakis and button downs. Vicki was to their left. There was an empty chair for me, right between Vicki and my mother. That was fitting.

  “Hey, guys,” I said as I took a seat. “Sorry I’m late, got held up at work.”

  I motioned to the waitress and ordered a Corona. After pleasantries were exchanged, they continued their going conversation about Phoenix’s vision quest.

  He and his three friends had landed in Argentina, bought their bikes, and started their biking through the backcountry.

  “He’s so free,” he mused. “That’s the way we were meant to be. Just the free experience of being human, getting away from it all.”

  “For sure,” my mother said. “We’re so proud of him.”

  “But,” Soeyon said. “You don’t worry that he is losing valuable time getting farther and farther behind his peers?”

  I smirked, took a swig of my beer and put my arm around Vicki.

  This should be interesting.

  “Not at all,” my mother answered. “What he is gaining out there is an experience that is so far beyond what anyone can teach in a classroom. You know, that’s the thing. We put so much emphasis on education and degrees. They’re meaningless.”

  Joowon scoffed. “Meaningless? I would have to disagree with you on that.”

  Vicki and I looked at each other and stifled laughter. I looked over the menu to avoid getting sucked into this conversation.

  “Well, yeah,” my dad said. “I mean, no offense personally. You went into the medical field, and that requires advanced knowledge and--”

  “It certainly does,” Joowon interrupted.

  “And I one hundred percent respect that,” my dad continued. “But most of the kids these days are borrowing tax dollars this country doesn’t have, for training that doesn’t prepare them for jobs that no longer exist. Now what sense is that?”

  The waitress came by and took our orders, and she was not much younger than our parents but looked haggard and worn. When she left Joowon turned to my dad.

  “So that they can be prepared for a better future than that,” he gestured toward where the waitress had gone.

  Vicki and I glanced at each other with our mouths agape, and my dad coughed with his shock.

  “Now that’s snobby,” my mother scoffed. “What if she’s perfectly happy with her life?”

  Joowon looked like he was going to come unglued at being called a snob. Soeyon stepped in.

  “It’s okay, honey,” she soothed him.

  “No, it’s not,” he tried. “They’re rude, honey--”

  “Rude?” my dad interrupted. “You’re the one who insulted the livelihood of the hard working waitress.”

  “What my husband is trying to say--” Seoyon said.

  “I don’t think there is anyone at this table who doesn’t know exactly what he is trying to say,” my dad added.

  “Okay, everyone,” I said. “I think we all got off on the wrong foot. Why don’t we talk about something a little lighter?”

  “I agree,” Joowon said.

  “Definitely,” my dad said.

  “So, how was your day, Henry?” my mother asked.

  With the tension still thick at the table, it was a hard question to answer.

  “We got the menagerie off to the wildlife sanctuary,” I said.

  “Really?” Vicki asked. “I hadn’t heard the update.”

  “Yeah,” I said. “All we have on our hands is one missing zebra.”

  “Now,” my dad said, “you’ve got to go on a hunt for the zebra?”

  “I’ve got to meet with a bounty hunter tonight,” I said. “Hopefully we can get it settled.”

  The waitress came and brought our food, and I noticed Joowon go out of his way to compliment her. She smiled kindly but seemed nonplussed.

  Once she was gone, I dug into my enchilada. I had developed a sophisticated palate in L.A., but at heart I was still an Arizona boy, and could devour some Mexican food.

  The enchiladas were a hearty mixture of cheese, tortilla, chicken, salsa, and refried beans with Spanish rice. I noticed Vicki smirking at my enthusiasm. She pushed around the burrito on her plate. Her parents had played it safe with grilled chicken salad and bean soup and ate tentatively.

  “A bounty hunter?” Vicki asked.

  “Bloodhound Bill,” I answered.

  “Aww,” my dad said. “Little old Willy Flannagan?”

  “Not so little anymore,” I answered.

  At that moment, I heard my name across the restaurant.

  “Horace,” I said to the menacing looking man that approached our table. Horace was a massive machine, all muscle and brawn, with a large mustache and arms covered in tattoos. His default expression was a scowl, but at the sight of us, his face burst into a large smile. “It’s so good to see you.”

  “Good to see you,” I said. “These are my parents, Saffron and Moondust, and Vicki’s parents, Joowon and Seoyon.”

  Horace shook all their hands and shook his head. “These two stood by me and proved my innocence when no one else believed me. I owe my whole life to these guys.”

  “Well,” I tempered his commented for the sake of modesty, “You didn’t commit any crime. All we did was let the truth speak for itself.”

  He looked over at our parents with approval. “All of y’all did a good job raising these two. I mean it.”

  He winked at us and our quartet of parents thanked him. I noticed Seoyon had an odd look on her face.

  “What did you do for that man?” she asked us.

  “That was our last big case,” Vicki said. “He was framed for murder by a drug dealer and a city councilwoman. They framed him to cover their tracks so they could keep embezzling money. We uncovered it all.”

  Joowon nodded in approval. “Yo
u uncovered an embezzlement scheme?”

  “Yeah,” I asked. “It went back decades.”

  At that moment Perry and Kristin Mc Grath walked in the restaurant.

  “Henry and Vicki!” Perry exclaimed, and they both hugged us. “So good to see you guys.”

  “Sorry I didn’t get back to you,” Perry told me. “The suggestions you made on that contract were spot on what I wanted to say. I just didn’t know if I could say it and not lose the deal.”

  “No,” I said. “I’ll kick it back to them tomorrow. But I think a non-exclusive agreement is entirely reasonable.”

  “And you guys are going to the craft beer fest, right?” Kristen asked. “We aren’t taking no for an answer.”

  “Guys, this is Perry and Kristen,” I said, and I introduced them all to our parents. “We’re helping them get their new product into stores nationwide.”

  “Really?” Joowon said. “What product?”

  “We make kombucha,” Perry said. “And we’re getting into Earth Market.”

  “Earth Market,” Joowon said. “That’s good work.”

  “Thanks,” Perry said.

  “Kombucha,” Seoyon nodded approval. “That is a very good tea, many health benefits. It originated in Japan, but our people in Korea have been using it for centuries.”

  Perry looked like he was about to lose it with excitement. I saw him glance around for an additional chair. When there wasn’t one, he said, “I have studied so much about the Asian roots of the drink. I would love to just pick your brain about different methods and practices. If you would be open to it, of course.”

  Seoyon nodded. “I have used it as a preventative health cure in my family for years. But, yes, I’d be open to talking about how we make it.”

  I turned to Vicki. “You never told me that.”

  She rolled her eyes and whispered to me. “I told you, I hate the stuff.”

  I laughed, and Perry was on his knees next to Seoyon’s chair getting her email address so that they could converse overseas.

  “Honey,” Kristen said as she rubbed her baby bump. “They’re trying to have dinner.”

  “Right, right,” he shook his head. “Don’t let us keep you. Enjoy your dinner.”

  “Good to see you guys,” Vicki said as they walked away.