Back to You

by Lauren Dane

  He winced. “Ouch.”

  “I tried for years. I stayed here instead of Manhattan where at that time my professional life was centered. I never, ever get in your way when you want to see the girls. They’re with you on holidays. I took them to your parents while you were on tour, for God’s sake. So kindly take your suggestion that I give a little and shove it up your ass.”

  Vaughan, clearly stunned, just stared at her. And she didn’t even feel the need, not for a moment, to apologize.

  “You’re right. I’m sorry. You did make sacrifices. You have made an effort to keep the girls near my family. They see that, too, and totally appreciate it, Kelly.” He sighed, but kept their fingers linked. “None of us are who we were eight years ago. Ezra has gone through hell and fought his way back. Damien fell in love, got married, he’s going to be a dad in a month or so. Paddy was totally blindsided by Natalie but I fully expect him to be proposing soon. They all like you. They’ve all told me to get you back. My dad’s given me some pretty freaking great advice. They want us—you, me and the girls—to be a family. One hundred and ten percent, they’re all behind me, wanting us to work out. Truly.”

  “You know, here’s a thing. None of us are who we were, that’s true. But you want to keep glossing over the seeds of this entire mess. Not just the years after we split. But the way your mother has been to me since day one. This isn’t about my sacrifices. That’s parenting, Vaughan. This is about the shitty attitude your mother has had since the moment she met me. She thinks I’m a gold-digging whore and she thinks that because you never told her the truth. That makes me sort of ragey right now, come to think of it.”

  “I’m going to see her next week at the ranch to talk to her. About everything. And to tell her she has to welcome you the way she has Mary, Natalie and Tuesday. It can’t work any other way. Thing is, and I’m not defending her, but I think she’s been trying to find a way to admit she might like you for a few years now.”

  “I already let you put your penis in me, stop lying.”

  He burst out laughing, bringing her hand to his mouth to kiss her fingertips. “Not lying! I swear. She’s a mom. She sees you and no one can look at the job you do and deny how great you are at raising our girls. We’ll talk. I’ll explain and yeah, confess. And we’ll all move forward. You, Maddie and Kensey are my priority. Do you believe me?”

  She didn’t hesitate before nodding. She just hoped he kept them his priority and didn’t run off when it got hard.

  The truth was, yes, they all had changed. Heaven knew she wasn’t the same, either. She wanted to fit with the Hurleys, too. Wanted to feel like more than an outsider who brought the kids over to see them.

  “There’s no moving forward until she hears the truth and reacts appropriately.”

  “All right. I’m sorry this happened. I wanted tonight to be special and romantic.” Vaughan had realized, when Kelly told him about what Stacey had done for them, that other than sleeping and sex and parenting stuff, he hadn’t been paying enough attention to the romance, that intimacy they needed to keep building and renewing. Strengthening them like a shield from whatever storms came along.

  He raised his glass and touched it to hers. “To second chances.”

  “Redemption.”

  He drank and then took a while to watch the candlelight glinting against the gold of her hair, the sparkle of her earrings, the gloss of her nails. So exquisite but she made it look effortless.

  “You look so gorgeous. I want to get out a spoon and eat you up in three bites.”

  Her smile drew him closer.

  “That’s a nice thing to say.”

  “I forget sometimes how stunning you are. And then you get all dressed up, or I see you in some fantastic outfit for work and I remember. I remember sitting, watching you get your makeup done for a show. I remember what you look like, that walk of yours, as you owned that runway. Boom. Boom.”

  “My agent has me come in to teach the newbs how to walk. Twice a year. Like orientation with Aunt Kelly. God, they’re all so young. Fresh-faced off the bus from nowhere, USA. I see them a year later, the ones who make it anyway, and all that fresh-faced stuff is fading.”

  “Along with the supermodel thing, I forget sometimes that you didn’t have much of a normal life as a kid.”

  “Says the rock-star rancher.” But her tone wasn’t angry or upset. Just amused. “We were in the Philippines when I was Kensey’s age. Then we lived in Turkey. I’ll give Rebecca credit, she found every freaking casting call she could, no matter the location. After that is when Rebecca left him, taking me with her. When we got back to the United States she put me in classes and about a year later I was picked up by Exclusive. Still with them, actually. Twenty years in July.”

  He’d seen the photos of her, a fourteen-year-old walking on the runway. She’d been part of a new wave of models at the time. The all-star team, so to speak.

  He wanted to know more about her life. Back when they’d been together she’d told him some, but he hadn’t pressed for more than she’d given. Probably a mistake. In any case, one he didn’t want to repeat. “Do you see your mother much? Or your father?”

  “He died three years ago. He’s buried in Tacoma. I found out a few months after.”

  “I’m sorry.” He was. He couldn’t imagine the pain of having one of his parents just walk away like her father had.

  She shrugged. “People die. He drank too much and it killed him. Or so I’m told. I haven’t seen him or spoken to him since before we met.”

  “You never told me the whole story.”

  “Dinner out with a gorgeous man is not the time for that shit.”

  “It’s part of you. I want to know. How can I understand you if I don’t?”

  “Maybe. But not right now. Call me selfish, but I just want a nice night without drama.”

  “I bet you never had drama with Ross.” Vaughan heard the petulant quality in his tone but he couldn’t be embarrassed by it even though he had no one to blame but himself.

  “Are you jealous?” Her tone was incredulous and he wanted to laugh. Of course he was jealous, for God’s sake!

  “Yes. He was going to marry you. Be a father to my daughters. You loved him. And not me.”

  Their appetizers arrived and she was quiet for a time.

  “I never stopped loving you. As for Ross? I loved him. But as Stacey points out to me all the time, I wasn’t in love with him. And I’m not marrying him. I’ve been married once, Vaughan, and that was to you.”

  “He took care of you when I should have.”

  “I took care of me. I don’t need a keeper.”

  No, she didn’t. She’d always been independent. But this version was grown-up and he wasn’t a part of it. Not in any positive sense.

  “We didn’t have drama. Though his mother—” she rolled her eyes “—is a huge part of his life, too. He’s not a dramatic person. He’s solid. I used to think he was reliable.”

  “Used to?”

  She tried to wave it away but he wasn’t going to be swayed. Something had come up and he wanted to know what it was.

  “Please. Tell me.”

  “It’s not even a thing.”

  “Then it won’t be a problem for you to tell me what it is.”

  Kelly’s annoyed growl made him hide a smile.

  “Fine. I think he told her, the ex, about some of my food stuff.”

  “How do you...? Oh shit, the comment she made at the carnival?” He felt sick on her behalf.

  Kelly nodded.

  “I’m sorry. That’s fucked up.”

  Her bottom lip wobbled, just a bit, and he ached to make that pain go away.

  “I’m trying really hard, you know. Trying to not break your heart, or hurt your feelings. I have. Before. But I don’t get him
. I figured he had more on the ball than that.”

  “Everyone does stupid shit when they’re hurting, I suppose.”

  “Did you confront him?” Vaughan didn’t know how to feel about it if she had.

  “I thought about it over the weekend. But I realized there’s nothing to be gained in doing that. It’s over. I feel less bad about breaking the engagement now, so there’s that.”

  His heart lightened at her joke.

  “I guess I expected him to be hurt and even angry. But he took something that was private, something he only knew about because he was allowed into my life, and he told someone else and she used it to hurt me. I hate to think he knew that would happen, but it might have. It could even have been a random comment because she’s a bitch. Whatever it is, nothing good can come of me confronting him. The strongest reply I can give is to not let it show that I was hurt.”

  It shouldn’t have to be, though.

  “Is it cool that I want to punch him for making you sad?”

  She snickered and then sighed happily when their entrées arrived. “Sure. That’s cool.”

  They had a long, leisurely dinner and drinks and by the time they walked back to the valet stand, his life was about a thousand times better, and it was already really amazing.

  Once they pulled out, he headed away from the freeway.

  “Scenic route?” Kelly asked.

  “I have a hotel key. We have a babysitter for several more hours. I was thinking, loud hotel sex might make tonight even better.”

  “My. You’re going to earn that merit badge early if you keep this up.”

  * * *

  KELLY TURNED SLOWLY as she tossed her bag on a chair. “Some view for a quickie,” she told Vaughan, who prowled around her, getting her all flustered and tingly.

  “Paddy brings Natalie here from time to time. He said it was romantic. You in my hotel room, ready for me to sex up one side and back down the other is a million times better.”

  He moved close and then dropped to his knees. She sucked in a breath, her hands gripping his shoulders for a moment.

  “Mmm.” He pressed his face into her, the vibration of that hum of satisfaction echoing to her clit. “Been some time since I’ve looked at you from this angle.”

  His hands slid down the curve of her calves, down to her ankle where he slid first one shoe off, and then the other.

  Kelly gave in and tunneled her fingers through his hair, messing it up. “You look like a pirate this way.”

  Those green/brown eyes of his locked on her mouth for so long she tightened her fingers, tugging.

  “Legs, I’m kind of in the middle of something right now. But I’ll pirate it up. Pillage you extra hard.”

  “Promise?”

  The teasing light in his eyes faded. All laughter was gone, replaced by white-hot need. He pulled at her dress, impatient.

  Kelly pushed his hands away, moving to do it herself, far more carefully.

  “I want you naked,” he said, going back to grab the hem of her dress.

  “I’m happy to make that happen, but if you rip this dress I will hurt you.” A quick unclasping of the neck and it fell away, leaving her in a pair of tiny panties and nothing else.

  “Best. Day. Ever.”

  “It’s about to get a lot better.”

  She slowly unbuttoned the front of his shirt, sliding her hands all over his bared skin as she freed his arms, putting the shirt with her dress. Then the belt, unbuttoned the pants and it was her turn to drop to her knees.

  “I was doing something.”

  She yanked his pants down and helped him step from them, along with his boxers.

  “Yeah?” Kelly rubbed her cheek along his cock and he hissed but didn’t argue any further. Which was good because she liked where she was and had no plans to let him get her all addled and take over again. Not just yet.

  “Go on, then. Swallow it.”

  She did nearly choke because the rough, dirty words went straight to her solar plexus and points south.

  Dirty talk was new and she liked it.

  Enough to comply, taking him as deeply as she could before pulling back and doing it again.

  This time it was his hands on her shoulders to keep his feet. That pleased Kelly nearly as much as the power of bringing him so much pleasure.

  The muscles in his thighs bunched as he locked his knees and she hummed, delighted.

  Vaughan swore under his breath, his fingers on her shoulders tightening until one hand let go, reaching to caress her hair and the side of her face and throat. The heat of him flowed against her cheeks and chest.

  Each time she took him as deeply as possible, the coarse hair on his legs brushed her nipples. The slow build of pleasure began to saturate each one of her cells, warming in its wake.

  This was connection. Not just a blow job, but the deepest trust she’d felt with him since he’d moved in. The tenderness in his touch rocked her to her foundations.

  “Still the most beautiful creature I’ve ever seen,” he said quietly and she opened her eyes so she could see his face.

  He gasped when she did, the shock of the intensity of that depth of connection seemed to snap into place.

  She didn’t have to tell him she understood. That she felt it, too. He could see it in her gaze, she knew.

  “So close,” he whispered.

  Kelly scored her fingernails up the backs of his calves and gripped the base of his cock with one hand and cupped his balls with the other. He let out a string of curses and then came on a snarl of her name.

  Kelly barely had the time to kiss the head before he’d pulled her to her feet and crushed his mouth to hers, taking a kiss that seared her.

  “But you mess with the goods, doll, and you gotta pay.”

  “Jesus, Pretenders lyrics snarled at me by a naked rock star with ink and piercings. I may have just come.”

  He swept her up and tossed her to the bed, falling with her, rolling on top. “May have? Well, we should be sure. For science.”

  Her laugh died as he took a nipple between his teeth, flicking his tongue against it hard and fast. Licks of heat flowed through her. He reared up enough to touch her everywhere he could as he moved to the other nipple.

  He was going to kill her. At some point she was going to explode into flame and there’d be only ash left.

  Which was her last really coherent thought as he shifted down, kissing and licking over her belly, to her hips where he paid attention to her most sensitive spots until she was ready to roll him back over and jump on his cock herself.

  “Now, I think we’re ready to conduct our first scientific trial.”

  “Get to it!” Kelly was pretty sure she sounded a smidgen panicked.

  He laughed as he used his thumbs to spread her open and blew against her pussy right before he began to lick and suck at her clit as he kept her wide with palms that seemed so very big all of a sudden.

  White lights shone against her closed eyelids as she came with a very loud moan. He kept at it until she pushed him back, a hand on his head as she shifted up the bed.

  She heard the crinkle of a condom wrapper and started, eyes wide as she realized he was already hard and ready.

  “A girl could get used to this kind of recovery time.”

  He stayed on his knees between her thighs, her back on the bed. Then he grabbed her, pulled her up his thighs, sliding into her while she wrapped her calves around his waist.

  In this position he controlled how deep, how hard; he kept the pace as he thrust, settling in.

  “Good to know as I have no plans to let you get used to me not being around.”

  She hoped so. Now that he was around again, she’d gotten used to him, and not just in bed.

  Vaug
han took his sweet time, drawing her so very close to climax and then easing back, slowing only to incite her again just a few strokes later.

  Then he wet his fingers in his mouth and used them on her clit. With all the teasing it was pretty much all she needed to get that last bit of sensation and spiral into climax, arching her back, holding him close with her legs.

  He groaned, grabbing her hips and holding her against him as he rocked deep. Kelly watched his features as orgasm claimed him, felt the pulse of his cock inside her as a few smaller orgasms skittered through her system until he pulled out and fell back to the bed, gasping for air.

  He got up, returning just moments later, rolling a cart in that she hadn’t even seen when they’d first come into the room.

  “I think we’ve solved the problem of whether or not you came.”

  “So smug.” Kelly laughed.

  He grinned, kissing her hard. “I am. What man in my position wouldn’t be smug?”

  “As long as you keep making me come like that, I agree to your smugness.”

  “Not even done yet. We have another hour or two so I say we have some champagne and then go for another round.”

  “You have a deal.”

  CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

  “DADDY, WILL YOU sing with me?” Maddie asked as she got off the bus the next afternoon.

  He took her hand and Kensey’s on the other side as they walked back toward the house.

  “I will always sing with you, baby. Name the time.” The sky overhead was deep blue, white marshmallow-fluff clouds dotted it. Kids streamed down the sidewalks, played in the park as they walked past. And his children loved music as much as he did.

  Not much better than that.

  “You know, Mommy’s birthday is in two weeks. I want to give her a song.”

  He stopped, kneeling to face his oldest. “That’s a great idea. She’d love it. Do you have a song in mind?”

  Maddie nodded. “Patty Griffin’s ‘Let Him Fly.’ It’s her favorite.”

  “I’m not sure I know that one. I love what I’ve heard for this birthday present, though.” He stood, continuing to walk back home. “Sing me some.”