Hold Onto Me_A Secret Baby Romance

by Juliana Conners

  “Why the long face?” asked Monica, pouting and nudging me with her elbow at the same time. We were all walking at a decent pace, but Michelle’s question made everyone slow down to catch a glimpse of me.

  “Oh no, I’m okay. Really. To be completely honest, I’m just feeling guilty about being out here frolicking in the woods while Whitney stayed behind to look after the little ones. I’m starting to think that maybe I should have stayed behind with her.”

  “Aw, honey! Don’t feel that way! Whitney really wanted you to come out here. She said it so many times. If she had needed you to stay behind with her, I’m sure that she would have said so,” said Monica reassuringly.

  “Oh, believe me,” said Harlow. “Monica’s right that Whitney would tell you. She was just joking yesterday about how this pregnancy has turned her into a dragon lady. I disagreed since I think she’s been quite pleasant, but, it’s true that she’s been more assertive than usual. Besides, there’s no way that her pregnant self could have made it a yard, let alone as far as we have come. Michelle, you’ve been a ray of positivity in this experience and I’m certainly glad that you decided to come along. My lovely wife on the other hand, may not have made it with such a big smile on her face.”

  “Well, maybe if you’d stop knocking her up every year she wouldn’t always have a reason to be miserable,” said Jensen, while everyone laughed.

  “She hasn’t been pregnant every year,” Harlow said, rather defensively.

  “Aww, don’t get butt hurt,” said Darren, clapping Harlow on the back hard. “We’re only teasing you. And besides, it’s good to know that you guys have found a way to entertain yourselves in case your TV ever breaks. But Harlow, how about giving poor Whitney a break next year, will ya?”

  The whole group roared with laughter, including Harlow. Elijah smiled a little. I could tell that he was enjoying himself despite his reserved demeanor.

  “In all seriousness, congratulations on baby number three,” said Monica. “You really have a beautiful family.”

  “Thank you,” said Harlow, sincerely appreciative.

  Listening to them talk about Whitney being pregnant made me wonder if I would ever have a family of my own. I loved being around new babies, children, and the families that I worked for, but it just wasn’t the same as having my own family… children who looked and acted like me and whomever their father would be.

  Usually, I tried not to think about it too much and just convinced myself that it would happen when the time was right. But moments like these made me wish that the time was right now.

  “I can vouch for the fact that they are truly beautiful and amazing children inside and out,” Harlow said. “I was just telling Whitney the other day how grateful that I was that we found each other. It’s not always that easy.”

  “I bet,” said Monica. “I remember when James first started school. I looked around at all the other kids and my heart went out to their poor teacher. She was the sweetest lady. She had to be fresh out of college. She came in to work every day looking like a Barbie doll and by the end of the day, she looked like Raggedy Ann.”

  “Yeah, it can be challenging at times, that’s for sure,” I said, nodding. “That’s why I feel really lucky that I found Harlow and Whitney when I did. I had just finished working for a family that I’d been with for years. But once the kids grow up— and it happens so fast— there’s nothing for me to do anymore.”

  “Well it seems that ole Harlow here is going to make sure that you’ve got job security for a good while, what with the way that he and his wife seem to keep popping them out,” Elijah said. “And they are truly lucky to have someone as kind and beautiful as you are in their lives.”

  Everyone fell silent at Elijah’s obvious flirt. They smiled secretly among themselves, but nobody said a word. I could feel my cheeks turning a deep crimson red and felt like I was on fire, even in the bone-chilling cold out in the winter woods.

  I didn’t want to read too much into it. Besides, between my fantasies and rampant thoughts, entertaining a crush for this handsome stranger was making me feel guiltier with each passing minute.

  Monica pulled me off to the side so that we were out of earshot of the rest of the group. She stopped and searched my face worriedly.

  “Are you sure you’re okay? You took a pretty good tumble there,” she asked sweetly.

  “Oh yeah. I’m having a great time out here. Probably too much of a good time,” I admitted, forcing laughter up out of me. I shuddered at how fake it felt and sounded.

  “Honey, you know it’s okay if you relax and enjoy yourself a bit, right?”

  That got a real laugh out of me.

  “Yeah I know, but this is what I do for a living. And beyond that, I don’t consider myself a glorified babysitter. I really care about their family and want to do my part in helping to raise happy and healthy children.”

  “That is truly noble of you,” Monica said. “But do you see that whole hunk of a man who clearly has the hots for you? Most single women would kill to be with him. He is what we call a real panty dropper.”

  “We’ll see,” I told her, not wanting to talk about it.

  But deep down, I knew Monica was right. Elijah was so tall and solid. And with all the layers of clothes that he had on, he kind of resembled the Incredible Hulk in winter gear. Well, the Incredible Hulk without the green skin. Just add a beard and a delectable, tight butt. He was built like every he-man super hero or action figure I could think of.

  We jogged a little to catch up with the rest of the group.

  Snap out of it, I thought to myself. I knew that what Monica said had some truth to it. Elijah was definitely incredibly sexy. There was no doubt about that. I had just been hesitant to be Vacation Michelle since I was here with my employer and their family.

  I had been Professional Michelle up until now. I had passed on the wine at dinner and had spent a large part of my evening in the guest room that I had been staying in at Darren and Hope’s lovely home.

  I really wanted to focus on making sure that the kids’ routine didn’t get too off course and have us right back at square one. There was no telling how military man Harlow would take another ripple in the routine at home. I could run the risk of things getting so far off track that I didn’t even have a job to go back to after this.

  It would be horrible if I was pulled into their office and told, “Based on your performance on this trip we have decided that we will no longer be needing your services.” Then I would be right back in the land of uncertainty, hoping that my father wouldn’t drink his whole pension away and need me to float us while I got new and stable employment. Besides, a good family to nanny for was hard to come by, so that was why I had been so hyper focused on staying professional.

  But Monica must have noticed the tension in me because she looked really worried. And the fact that she felt the need to say something spoke volumes. Maybe it would be okay to relax a little. Whitney had already told me several times that she didn’t expect that I would be working the whole time. It was a family holiday after all, and she was grateful that I accepted, knowing it meant giving up time with my own family.

  Little did she know that she was saving me from a sad takeout dinner with my dad, who would yell at the TV because whatever football team he was rooting for was losing. They always seemed to disappoint him, but he just kept rooting for them anyway.

  He would end up crying, talking about how holidays and how our lives would never be the same again now that my mother was gone. He was right, but I could go without yet another sad reminder of that. And I carried guilt about it around like an anchor.

  Being around the Bradfords made me remember just how happy the holidays could really be when you spend time with people you love and who love you back. Their joy was contagious. It made me wish that I could freeze time so that I could always feel this vibrant and excited about life.

  “Are we there yet?” called out Jensen, in his best imitation of his childre
ns’ high pitched voices.

  “Hey Daddy, give me a ride!” said his daughter, in a high-pitched voice. He scooped her up and continued walking, giving her a piggy back ride along the way.

  “Brrr,” she said, burying her head in his neck.

  I was starting to get antsy myself to finally get out of the cold and warm up for a bit.

  “My cabin is just over that hill,” said Elijah.

  “I guess your cabin is a further walk than you thought,” joked Harlow.

  It was clear he thought he had been in the right about wanting to head back to Darren’s, but that he didn’t want to be too much of an ass by pointing it out.

  “No matter how you try to spin it, my cabin is a lot closer than Darren’s,” said Elijah, very sure of himself.

  There was something about his assured confidence that made him even sexier. He didn’t stop and wait for anyone to cosign onto what he was thinking or feeling. Half the time, he didn’t care enough to even let people in on what he was feeling. He just kept right on walking.

  There was so much that I wanted to know about him. I was trying my hardest to put to rest all the questions that were swirling around my head about him.

  Where did he come from? And better yet, where was he going? And did he want company?

  He was the kind of guy that I could follow to the ends of the earth. Or the deepest parts of the forest. Or, I guess, however far my nanny jobs would let me roam, anyway.

  “How long did you say that you’ve been living out here, Elijah?” I asked, trying to be as nonchalant as possible, but wanting to have my curiosity satisfied on what was becoming a longer walk than any of us had imagined.

  “A few years now,” was his short answer.

  His face softened as he turned to look at me, smiling. His smile was so warm and inviting.

  “Who knew? I guess this area is one that people who don’t like to be around other people would choose to live in, huh, Darren and Elijah?” asked Harlow.

  “I guess so,” said Darren, rubbing the back of his neck, deep in thought.

  We walked in silence for a few more minutes.

  “Look!” called out one of the kids, pointing in the distance at a mahogany cabin tucked away neatly behind a row of trees. A single wisp of smoke rose from the brick chimney perched on the roof.

  “Home sweet home,” said Elijah softly, almost like he was talking to himself.

  “Race you to the porch!” yelled one of the boys to the rest of the group. The kids took off like a stampede in the direction of the cabin.

  “Be careful! Not so fast! You don’t want to hurt yourself.” The words tumbled out of my mouth before I could give them much thought. I really did sound like a mom.

  No sooner than the words had left my lips, the guys took off toward the cabin, pushing each other to get an advantage over the other. Even though they were grown men, they didn’t really look any different from the gang of children that had taken off before them.

  “It’s okay, Michelle,” said Monica, resting her hand on my arm. “Let them have their fun. They are on vacation, after all.”

  “That’s true,” I said, trying to will my heart to stop beating so fast.

  It didn’t take very much to launch me into protective nanny mode. I just kept thinking about how horrible it would be if someone fell and broke a bone or cracked their skull and we were a million miles away from any type of medical professionals. I knew very minimal first aid procedures and could do CPR if someone were to be gasping for breath, but I could hardly do anything if someone were to seriously injure themselves out here in the mountains.

  Suddenly, all I heard was, “Look out!” and everything went black.

  Chapter 9 - Michelle

  The next thing I knew, I was looking up at the sky and trees. I was moving but I knew that I wasn’t walking. I couldn’t believe I had just been worried about someone else getting hurt, when I myself was the one who ended up falling down. My leg was still weak from hurting it a little bit ago and I guess it couldn’t carry the weight of the rest of me much longer.

  “Well good morning, sunshine,” a voice above said.

  I looked up and saw Elijah. Before I knew it, I was swopped up and being carried. I was in Elijah’s arms. He walked at a steady pace, despite holding me in his arms. His muscles felt as good as they looked. It was if I was floating through the trees.

  “You don’t have to carry me,” I told him, uneasily. “I’m pretty sure I can walk.”

  “I don’t know. You got hit pretty hard by those branches.”

  “What exactly happened?” I asked, confused. “I guess I blacked out and don’t remember.”

  “You tried to run to keep up with the guys, and after Harlow went through a tree, one of the branches smacked you in the face and you fainted,” Monica explained. “Are you okay?”

  “Yes,” I said.

  I was hoping that whenever Elijah put me down, I wouldn’t fall for yet a third time. I was starting to feel clumsy, like maybe I had been brought along to offer the group some comedic relief at my own expense.

  “Is she okay?” asked Jensen, who had been further ahead of us, as he circled back around to check up on me.

  “Yeah, she’s good,” yelled Monica. “She was probably more shocked than anything.”

  “I’ve got her,” Elijah told them. Then, to me, he said, “I would hate for you to lose your balance and fall again. And besides, I get the chance to have an incredibly sexy lady in my arms. I am really the one winning here.”

  I nodded and said, “Thanks. I guess I wasn’t as okay after that last fall as I thought I was,” but the guilt was starting to creep back up. I had already felt bad about being in the woods, enjoying myself with all of them while I was supposed to be working. But now here I was, laying in the arms of a man whose body rivaled that of a bodybuilder.

  That definitely was not in my job description. But when I attempted to lift my head even a little bit, I felt like someone had hit me in the head with a hammer, so I had no choice but to lay there and take my free ride in the arms of this hospitable lady-killer.

  Elijah carried me to the front door, almost ignoring the fact that there was a whole group of other people with us. He yelled for them to come inside and make themselves more comfortable.

  I must have still been delirious, because I started having another fantasy, in which he just took me right on in to his bedroom and took my virginity.

  “I have been waiting for this since the moment that I laid eyes on you,” he said, laying me gently on the bed. He began taking off my clothes, starting with my coat, removing each layer like he was neatly unwrapping a Christmas present. He climbed into the bed on top of me and pressed his lips against mine.

  His soft, moist lips danced from my lips, down my neck and kept moving further south. His wiry beard tickled as it scratched my naked skin.

  His kisses felt like magic. He quickly undressed himself, shaking as he hurriedly pressed his hard dick against my pussy. He rubbed the head of his dick back and forth slowly across my throbbing clit.

  My back arched as I anticipated each stroke back and forth. I moaned with pleasure. I inhaled sharply as he slid his dick into the wet warmness of my pussy. I could feel his cock jumping inside me as he held himself in there tight. I could tell that he was trying to contain himself so that he didn’t explode in me.

  “You feel absolutely amazing,” he said, panting while he spoke.

  “So, do you,” I admitted.

  In real life, though, once he had carried me over the threshold of his cabin’s door, he took me to the living room and set me down gently on the couch in the living room. Everyone else was still coming in. There was no time or place for him to take my virginity, unfortunately.

  “Here you go,” he said, gently putting his hand under my chin. I looked up at him and said, “Thanks, I’m fine,” and got off the couch to welcome the others in behind me.

  “Take it easy,” he said, holding onto my hand to
steady me. I was surprised that it was so easy to regain my balance. I really did feel fine— perhaps from the adrenaline rush and exhilaration of being carried by him. “I wouldn’t want anything bad to happen to you now that you’re here safe in my cabin.”

  As I continued to meet his steady gaze, he winked at me and added, “Right where you belong.” My heart was still racing, and it wasn’t from the fall. Or, if it was, it was because I was clearly falling for him.

  We were all amazed once everyone was inside looking around at his house. It was a quaint cabin with large picture windows along the far wall where the kitchen was. There were hand carved wooden figurines tastefully placed along the walls. A crystal chandelier accented the living room. There were two red couches pushed against the walls.

  The thick, cream colored carpet covered most of the room. The fireplace was filled with the biggest fire that I had seen in quite some time. It almost looked like the inside of a furnace. The warmth was very welcoming. A few of the kids began to gather around the fireplace, warming their hands and red noses.

  “It’s not a huge house, but it works just fine for me,” said Elijah.

  “It’s lovely,” I said.

  I really did love the cabin. It was perfectly tucked away, a great place for just one person to have solitude. In fact, it seemed like the perfect size for even more than that. A small family, perhaps.

  Everyone started shedding their boots and heavy coats. Elijah was running around picking things up off the furniture and floor— it was obvious he wasn’t used to guests, but the decorations that adorned his house just for him far made up for any eyesore the mess might have caused. People seemed grateful for spaces to sit down. The way that everyone was strewn all over the couches and floors let me know that they had been worn out from the walk. I for one was grateful to be inside and out of the cold.