Shattered Love: Book one of the Forever us series

by Nivia Borell

  With his fingers, he strokes the artwork symbolizing our love and our togetherness. Damien finds the four-inch scar from the first surgery and the three much smaller ones from the second, one when they didn’t have to cut my chest open but instead used a less invasive form of surgery with fewer risks. All the marks are obscured by my two beautiful barn owls seated on a branch looking at each other, their wings forming a heart. It is vivid in its plainness, only the eyes in color, a painting for some damage control of my marred skin.

  He caresses the scars repeatedly. It unnerves me, but he ignores my tremors as he trails kisses over the long white line and then placing pecks on the star-like ones. I can’t keep the tears from blurring my vision, anymore, but they are tears of relief. I have been sure he wouldn’t have it in him to kiss something so abominable, which is how I think of them. It feels like centuries to me, how long he kisses and strokes my scars. And when he seeks my eyes, I gasp when he says something completely different from what I have expected.

  “I could never find anything responsible for saving your life even remotely abominable, Bria. I cherish your scars and what they represent to me. They are lovely, and I would still find them beautiful even if they weren’t hidden under the tattoo. The only thing I recognize when I look at your chest is a gorgeous painting representing love and the marks of a warrior who fought and won and should wear them with pride.”

  My mouth opens to contradict him but halt when I observe the seriousness burning in his eyes. For the first time since I’ve had them, I accept the marred skin. “Thank you, Damien.”

  His brows raise, and he asks, “For what, Bria?”

  “For making me feel better about them.”

  Pain surfaces in his eyes, and he cracks. “I am so sorry, Bria.

  “For what?”

  “For putting them on you in the first place.”

  His voice is a clear indicator of how raw he is.

  “Hey, Damien, look at me. Don’t go there, please, because I’m tired of always having to return to that moment in time. We can’t let it control our lives anymore. We healed each other tonight. It felt purifying. Let’s enjoy the here and now for a while. Do you agree?”

  He nods, springs up, and says, “Then, let’s wash everything bad away.”

  Damien scoops me into his arms and carries me to the bathroom. I giggle the whole time. He puts us both in the empty bathtub and turns on the tap. The hot water fills around us as I lie between him, knees up and my head on his chest. We laze in here surrounded by the peaceful silence, the warmth of the water, and how our bodies are flush against each other.

  “You’re perfect for me, Bria. I can’t get enough of you. You’re my addiction, always have been and always will be.”

  When I crane my neck to face him, I detect the truth of his words etched on his face, and my heart does a happy dance. And because I have no words, I show him instead that I believe him, and I am, in one word, his. I scrub every inch of his perfect male body, and when I am finished, he takes the soap from my hands and does the same for me. Not a spot is left unrinsed on my body he didn’t give his most attention to.

  Clean and satisfied, he dries me with a fluffy towel but not before smacking my behind, which earns him a raised eyebrow and a yelp of surprise. He picks me up in his arms again and carries me to the bedroom.

  “You lift and carry me as if I weigh nothing.”

  “Well, baby, you’re as light as a feather, and it happens I like carrying you around.”

  I bite the inside of my cheek and suppress a smile. “You’re being ridiculous.”

  I peek outside to see the sun awakening the earth’s surface. The time in our tranquil bubble is up, and with the light, the blissful hours we spent together fade.

  He seems to sense where my thoughts head and squeezes me to him. Damien shelters me in his arms. I let him take his time, my eyes sealed, and my heart tearing inside me. He groans but puts me down.

  The first thing I do is seek my cell phone. I bend from my waist and grab it from the floor. My eyes widen when I realize I have just half an hour left before my driver picks me up.

  Damien just stands there beside the bed rooted and immobile. I avoid his probing glances. I put on a new black lace bra and matching panties and a black jumpsuit covered in floral patterns I snatch from my suitcase. Dressed, I plod to him, only feet separating us, but it feels like so much more now, and I sigh. “I…”

  I don’t bring any words out because he is in my face a second after, hurt blazing in his sharp steel eyes. “Don’t even dare, Bria. Don’t you dare look me in the eyes and say you’re going to leave me. Did this whole night represent nothing to you?”

  And in a despondent voice I do not recognize as my own, I say, my head sunken as I draw circles around a yellow petal on the soft fabric. “It represented everything, Damien, but it doesn’t change a thing.”

  He raises my chin with his index finger, and then he cups my face in his unbending hands, and I meet his scorching eyes. “I love you, goddammit.” Sincerity and agony battle in his voice.

  “I love you, too, Damien, so very much.”

  He strokes my cheek. “Why are you saying goodbye, then, Bria?”

  “Because goodbye is all there is left to say.”

  He sighs. I sigh. I conclude we are too good at it.

  “How many more goodbyes, Bria? We’ve said them over these seven years with words, and we said them with acts. Shall we say them once more? Which one will it be this time? Say it with your heart, and I promise you I’ll find it in me to accept it. Say it with your soul and mean it, and only then will I let you go, even if it is forever this time if this is what you want, baby.”

  My defeat surfaces from the deepest corners of my troubled soul. “As usual, you’re asking the impossible. My heart can never say goodbye to you because I gave it to you a long time ago and never took and wanted it back. No goodbye could ever silence the love I have for you, Damien. We can never say goodbye to each other because our hearts will never be in it.”

  He takes in the sight of me, his jaw set in a hard line. “I know you need time and space, and what I propose now is the final and only compromise I will make because I love you, live and die for you. If I have to bleed a little more because of your absence, I’ll just have to endure it. And I will do it, but only if I know you’ll come back to me. So, this is what I propose to you.”

  I flex my hands, but his body doesn’t even flinch.

  “We are not negotiating here, Damien. Do you think this is a business deal you have to seal?”

  “Oh, this is more. It’s the deal of our lives, Bria. I’ll let you go.” My relief is short-lived when he adds, “But if news of a plane crash supposedly involving you comes to my ears, I will tell everyone the truth, consequences be damned. I will rip apart your legacy, piece for piece. Maybe I will sell our company. The possibilities are endless.”

  Shock and horror flood me, and my voice cracks. “You wouldn’t dare, Damien! You wouldn’t do either of those things.”

  “Well, then, test me and see what happens, Bria,” he shouts in a cold, challenging voice. “If I have nothing worth living for, what do I have to lose anymore? Take it into consideration. I’ll answer for you… it is nothing, Bria. Or you can just choose the other offer I have yet to propose. Hear the second one out before you decide.”

  I wrap my hands around myself with his next words.

  “I’ll give you three months, and during this time, I expect you to get the surgery done and find the sparkle in you. Grub it out, and then come home, to me, where you belong. If you are not here on the sixth of August, and not one day longer, I will call a corporate Board meeting where I resign and put the first plan in motion. And believe me, no one will stand against me. I swear it.”

  Fury bubbles up inside me, a direct result of his cold shrewdness. “How dare you!” I yell, and pound my fists against his chest. “You are threatening me, Damien, and not giving me an option I would choose on my own
.”

  “But I fucking did. I’ve given you options.”

  He has the audacity to look surprised at my reaction.

  “No, you self-centered bastard. You took the decision away from me! Either way, it is you who gains in the end.”

  “I will win only if I have you back, Bria. Anything else is just superfluous. Don’t you see, you fool, I can’t live without you? This stupid heart beats only for you, and I want you to live. I am fucking desperate, so don’t come on as the only one angry between us, Bria. If you are furious, then I am fucking livid!” The vibe he emanates is clear with the roar that has the force to rattle the entire building not to forget his flaring nostrils and a fine line of sweat covering his forehead.

  “I hate both of the options I gave you, too, because letting you leave this hotel room means I am powerless, and it makes me go berserk, Bria. I thrive on control, but I give it all to you to make you understand the depths of my love for you and what I would sacrifice to have you back. I trust you with my life. Please let me trust you with your life, too. I beg you, my strong, beautiful woman.”

  By the end of his speech, he shivers, and I cannot stay mad at him anymore. I guess I would have done the same in his place. I gasp in response, put a pair of ballerinas on, and pick up my suitcase.

  He shouts. “Nothing to say? Fine, have it your way, Bria. I will find out soon enough what you choose anyway.”

  I tiptoe to him, rise on my toes, and plant kisses on his clenched jaw and luscious lips. I inhale his spicy, unmistakable scent and feel the warmth of his body coerce me to give in. I seal my eyes to memorize this moment when I hand him my heart once again. He returns neither my kiss nor my embrace. So damn stubborn!

  “Please, Damien…” My voice cracks with a need I can’t decipher but hope he will.

  He dips his head and whisper-threatens, making my blood rush to my heart, “When you come back because I can’t fucking imagine it any other way, I’ll make you mine in every way known to mankind. Prepare yourself. But if you don’t… I’ll haunt you through time and space, Bria, and my wrath will blare in the universe.”

  I unpeel myself from him, and when I reach the door, he croaks, halting me. “Bria, this is not over, do you hear me? We’ll never be over as long as we both are breathing. I trust you to bring my life back.”

  BRIA

  I slam the door behind me and strain my legs to move as I confess to the silent floor, “I love you with all of me, Damien du Sky, but it is too late for us.” His words still echo in my head.

  But is it too late.

  Can I still be mended?

  As I step into the elevator, my heart sinks all over again. I rest my head on my stretched arm. Here I am, prisoner to my stupid obstinacy, leaving the love of my life, the only man I have ever loved behind in a hotel room. The resemblance to what happened seven years ago uncanny. I should steer clear of hotel rooms from now on, I think, trying to elevate my dejected mood.

  The driver greets and informs me Mr. Hope awaits me. He pulls the door of the black SUV open and carries my luggage to the rear of the car. Before I climb in, I make the mistake of gazing at the hotel windows for the room I shared with Damien last night.

  There he is, staring at me, his deep eyes piercing my soul. For a moment his incendiary stare traps me. We understand each other without words and have a whole conversation like this. I say he is being absurd to demand the impossible of me, and he retorts it is my choice, and also, “I let you have your way, aren’t you happy I am so selfless?” We are in a staring contest that breaks when I read his posture—Bring my heart back, Bria.

  A cough startles me. The driver gestures for me to climb in the car. I risk another glance, and this time, all I see is a plea in his eyes, a plea to come back to him.

  I pull my hair into a loose bun, slide a pair of black sunglasses over my nose and climb into the back as the engine purrs to life. While the driver takes me to the airport, my heart is fighting with my brain, a never-ending battle between love and reason. It tires me out.

  Already, I am missing Damien. I don’t know what to do anymore, what is right anymore. My thoughts tug at me even when we reach our destination. To my utter surprise, Quinn Hope stands between two private jets. I shuffle to him as he pulls me into a bear hug.

  “Why are you waiting outside?” I ask.

  “Because this is my final attempt to save you.”

  I groan. It seems the men in my life are this thick-headed.

  “Let me guess, Quinn. You give me two options, right?” My hands are crossed in front of me, and irony drips from my tongue with every syllable.

  “Well, that boy of yours earned a scrap of my respect.”

  My mouth drops open. “How? What are you talking about?”

  “Bria, honey, live as long as I have, and you may develop insights on things outside yourself. At least this time, he didn’t disappoint, although I would have preferred if he halted you from leaving. I guess he, too, is powerless when it comes to you. Now indulge me and let me hear about the deal he made with you.

  “You mean the threat.”

  I tap my lower lip with my finger as he cracks a smile and says, “I like his way of handling things. I should consider doing business with such a skilled young man.”

  “Don’t take his side, Quinn. It’s not right, just so we’re clear.” I put my hand on my heart because he just offended me, but he knows I’m faking it and smiles back at me.

  “But back to our unfinished business, sweetie. Two jets are prepared to take off as you have surely noticed. The one on the left will take you to the remote island in the Pacific where you can spend the time you have left to live the way you desire. The one on the right will take us both to Tokyo.”

  “Wait, what?”

  This is new information, and my head spins. What the hell happened in only a few hours because my world just spirals out of my control. I place my head between my hands and whine.

  “Well, always so impatient, Bria! I was getting there. You didn’t think I would stand around with crossed arms and wait for your final day now, did you, child? What did I teach you, Bria? You don’t give up the goal just because obstacles arise. You develop another strategy. For every plan A that fails, there is a plan B you have to concoct. Now, I have been searching for a doctor who could perform the surgery you need to keep you alive. I found him, and he assured me he could fix the damage, in theory, and if no complications arise. To be exact, no other doctor I consulted and showed your records to would perform the operation. They all said the risks aren’t worth it, but this surgeon has developed a new technique.”

  I am dumbfounded, and my head snaps to him. “But how? I mean, it’s impossible, Dad. I have waited too long.”

  “Nothing is truly impossible when you keep believing and don’t give up. I gave him all the information he asked for, your files and ECGs, everything from the beginning until now, and he seemed excited about the prospect. He has agreed to operate on your heart two or three days after our arrival.

  “I have to stress he is the only viable option left. You’re my daughter, Bria. Maybe not blood-related, but it is the same to me. I ask for your trust. We’re a team, remember? We fight for each other when we don’t have the power to fight for ourselves anymore.” He clasps my shoulder. “Choose to fight.”

  And so, here I am, split between two roads and considering the biggest decision of my life so far. Each possibility is life-altering, and I’m scared out of my mind.

  What should I choose? And will what I choose give me what I want—or rather, what I need?

  What will it be? As I am torn equally between past and future.

  Damien…

  Beautiful reader,

  I wish to express my gratitude to you for purchasing and reading Shattered Love, the first book in the trilogy, Forever Us, and offer it a place in your life and library. I hope you found at least a phrase, a dialogue, a scene, or a chapter memorable enough to say this story was worth the read.
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  It humbles me to know you gave it a chance. From now on, we share something more than a love for books.

  The story of Bria and Damien continues in the sequel, Healing Love. I hereby invite you to follow and be a part of their epic love journey.

  From my deepest heart, I pray you live a life of love, starting with yourself.

  Yours sincerely,

  Nivia Borell

  One who has always been in love with the magic words can create on a blank sheet.

  P.S. If you’ve liked this book, please tell a friend, and maybe even share your thoughts about Shattered Love online.

  Thank you for your support.

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  Nivia Borell is emerging romance author, equality advocate, and student of life on a mission to awaken emotions in the hearts of her readers through the power of the written word. From an early age, she had a deep affinity for words, which quickly became her life’s purpose, winning multiple writing contests throughout high school. Her debut novel is a contemporary romance entitled “Shattered Love,” which is Book 1 in the “Forever Us” series. Furthermore, she holds dual Bachelor degrees in Political Science and Business Administration.