Undead Ultra (A Zombie Novel)

by Camille Picott

  I snort. Frederico had forgotten to change the batteries on his headlamp on that race. Instead of trying to tag along with another runner, he tried to forge ahead alone—and ended up plowing right off a ledge and twisting his ankle. The stunt had forced him into a DNF—a Did Not Finish.

  The phone in my hand pings with another incoming text. Assured my friend is okay, I turn my attention back to the phone. I tilt the screen so Frederico can read it, too.

  Zombies r attracted 2 noise, Carter writes. That’s why I can’t talk. Think they’re blind too. Hunt by sound. Cars aren’t safe. They swarm cars.

  “That explains the white eyes,” Frederico murmurs.

  Are you safe? I text.

  No response.

  “He isn’t answering my question,” I say tersely.

  “Let me talk to him.” Frederico takes the phone from me.

  Carter, he texts. Uncle Rico here. R u safe?

  There’s a long pause. I can just imagine Carter trying to figure out if Frederico is really the one sending the text, or if it’s me pretending to be Frederico. Carter might try to protect me, but there’s a good chance he’ll be straight with Frederico. The two have always been close, even more so since Kyle died.

  At last, his answer comes.

  Safe for now. Can’t leave my dorm room. Zombies in hallway. On campus 2. I can see them from the window.

  A tremble goes through my chest, tears again springing to my eyes. Frederico rubs my back in wordless comfort.

  Pull your shit together, I scold myself. Carter needs a strong mom, not an emotional basket case. He’s already had to deal with that scenario one too many times in his life.

  My phone pings with another text.

  There are soldiers and CDC workers. Arrived this morning. Ordered everyone to stay inside. They arrest anyone they find outside. CDC people are in hazmat suits.

  If the military and CDC are involved, things are worse than I imagined. I snatch the phone from Frederico, pulling up the Internet browser. A quick search of the news networks brings up disturbing headlines.

  UNNAMED BIO THREAT DISCOVERED AT PORTLAND PORT

  CDC QUARANTINE 500-MILE RADIUS AROUND PORTLAND

  OREGON-CALIFORNIA BORDER CLOSED, CDC CHECKPOINTS AS FAR SOUTH AS EUREKA & REDDING

  ALL US PORTS CLOSED PENDING CDC INSPECTION

  ALL FLIGHTS GROUNDED IN PORTLAND AIRPORT

  PORTLAND BIOTERRORISM ATTACK CAUSING OUTBREAKS OF INSANITY AND CANNIBALISM

  The phone falls numbly from my fingers.

  Despite my inner attempt to rally, all hope crumples up inside me. I slump over, wrapping my arms around my stomach.

  This shit is real. CDC quarantines and checkpoints. Bio threats. Port closures.

  Zombies.

  My son is out there, trapped. And I have no way to get to him.

  Frederico picks up my phone, silently thumbing through the headlines. He lets me cry, administering more pats to my back. I sense him looking up and down the frontage road.

  “This isn’t over, Kate,” he says. “Not by a long shot.”

  “What are you talking about?” I raise bitter eyes. “In case you didn’t notice, my car is completely fucked. Even if I did have a car, there’s the CDC quarantine and the fact that zombies swarm cars. Carter is barricaded in his dorm room with no one to help him. We’re stuck here.”

  Frederico gives my back a final pat and pulls me upright. Looking me in the eye, he says, “Lace up, Kate. We’re hoofing it.”

  I blink stupidly at him. “What?”

  “Your car is totaled,” he says. “With all the shit that’s going down, maybe it’s a blessing in disguise. You want to find your son? Then we run.”

  “You want to run? All the way to Arcata?”

  He shrugs. “We scope out the situation as we go. If the roads look safe, we find a car to rent or buy. Or steal one, whatever. We can ditch it before we hit the CDC quarantine or if there are too many zombies. In the end, we’ll need to be on foot to get into Arcata.”

  “But . . .” I work a quick calculation in my head. “That’s at least two hundred miles.”

  Frederico takes my phone and pulls up a GPS app. After a moment, he says, “It’s exactly two hundred and one point three miles from this very spot to Humboldt University.”

  “Two hundred and one miles?” I say, incredulous. “Neither of us has ever run that far before.”

  “How many miles did you log last week?”

  “One hundred thirty-six,” I reply instantly. I keep a running log and track my mileage and elevation work.

  “I did one hundred and nine.”

  I think about this. For the average, non-crazy person, running two hundred or more miles would be impossible. At an ambitious walk, they may cover fifteen miles a day. Maybe twenty, if they’re in great shape. But Frederico and I have both made a hobby of running ultra races. Insane long distances are our specialty.

  My eyes dry. Something akin to hope blooms in my chest. If we only stop once or twice for catnaps—ultramarathons are run with little to no sleep—we can make good time. If we can find a car to use for a while, we can make really good time.

  “Do you think we can make it in two days?”

  Frederico, sensing my budding optimism, considers this. “Maybe, if we can knock out some distance in a car,” he says at last. “If we make the majority of the trip on foot, three days is a safer estimate.”

  “But we’ll be on the road,” I say. “Road running is always faster than trail running, and we’ve both done one-hundred-mile trail runs in under twenty-four hours.”

  “I haven’t done a sub-twenty-four in over five years, trail or road,” he replies. “The farther we go, the harder it will be to hold a decent pace. There’s no guarantee we’ll even be able to stay on the road. If things get hairy, we may be bushwhacking.”

  “Seventy-two hours.” I nod, letting this new reality sink in. I might not be cut out for zombie killing, but I am a long-distance runner. “Okay.”

  I pick up the phone and send one last message.

  Sit tight, sweetie. Frederico and I are coming to get you. Be there as soon as we can.

  Five seconds later, my phone rings. Carter’s smiling face pops up on the screen, an odd juxtaposition to everything that’s going on.

  “Put that thing on silent,” Frederico says.

  I obey, then hit the speaker button. “I thought you said you couldn’t talk on the phone,” I say anxiously.

  “You can’t come here,” Carter hisses. His words are barely above a whisper. “Cars are zombie magnets. I don’t know how far south the outbreak has spread, but I’ve seen at least three cars get swarmed today.”

  “No problem,” Frederico replies. “Your mom’s car is totaled, and we’re out in the middle of the vineyards without a taxi in sight. We’re running to you.”

  Silence.

  “You guys are crazy,” Carter hisses. “You can’t run here!”

  “Your mom and I are indeed crazy, and we’re coming to get you, kiddo. Deal with it.” With that, Frederico hangs up.

  It’s my turn to snatch the phone.

  Do u have enough snacks to hold u over until we get there? I text.

  Don’t come, he types back. Not safe.

  We r coming. Do u have enough food?

  Long pause. Then, Yes, we have snacks.

  What about water?

  Sink still works.

  Good. See u soon baby. Love u.

  Be careful Mom. Stay away from cars. Love you 2.

  Chapter 7

  Prep

  What follows is a routine Frederico and I have danced for nearly two decades: prep for an ultra run. Even though this will be a very different type of run, the essentials are the same.

  We pull my gear box out of the trunk. It’s overflowing with running supplies. I never go anywhere without it. Especially these days, when I’m running almost every day. The amount of money I spend on running paraphernalia is barely short of embarrassing.


  In silent symbiosis, we dive into the box. I pull out a headlamp and an extra set of batteries. Next come gloves, beanie, visor, and extra socks.

  “You should swap out your hydration pack for this one.” I pass Frederico my biggest spare pack, which has a two-liter water bladder. He nods in agreement, wordlessly dropping his pack into my trunk.

  I have five different running packs in my car—not to mention a few waist packs—each for different types of runs. For what’s in front of us, we both need packs with the maximum water and gear storage.

  “Shit. I’m low on fuel.” I scoop out three energy bars and one gel, passing them to Frederico. I follow this with a baggie of electrolyte tablets. These are all staples of the ultrarunner, except that I don’t have nearly enough for what’s ahead of us. “I was planning to go to the running store to restock.”

  I regret the fact that we didn’t get to eat all the breakfast we ordered at Bread Box. A big meal would have been a good start to this insane junket.

  “These won’t get us two hundred miles,” Frederico agrees, surveying our food supply.

  “Maybe we can stock up in Cloverdale,” I suggest. Cloverdale is a town ten miles north of us. “Maybe try to get a car there, too.”

  “Maybe,” he replies.

  Neither of us mentions the physical discomfort we’ll endure if we can’t adequately fuel our bodies. I try to eat two hundred to three hundred calories per hour when I run an ultra. I’ve distilled this down to a science over the years. My body can’t digest more than this, and as long as I keep up a steady stream of fuel, I’m in good shape. Based on our meager supply of snacks, we have enough for three, maybe four hours.

  “Fuck it,” I say, breaking the silence and dropping the food into my pile of gear. “We’ll have to figure out ways to refuel along the way.” I won’t let one little obstacle keep me from getting to my son.

  “That’s the jackalope we all know and love.” Frederico grins at me. “If we let little obstacles keep us from racing, we’d never make it to the starting line.”

  “At least we have a blister kit.” I pull out a little Ziploc filled with needles, Band-Aids, nail scissors, sterile wipes, and a tube of Neosporin.

  “Don’t forget to lube up.” Frederico produces a stick of Body Glide and passes it to me.

  To the normal person, this would look like a stick of deodorant. To an ultrarunner, it’s the difference between finishing a race or DNFing. Body Glide is a lubricant for runners designed to protect the body from chafing on a long run.

  I pull off my shoes and rub my feet with the stick, taking care to work it between my toes. I rub more along the base of my sports bra. These are the worst chafing areas for me. Then I pull on a clean pair of socks to replace the ones Frederico used to wipe his ass.

  “Can I borrow these?” Frederico pulls out a pair of compression calf sleeves. They’re fluorescent pink with orange polka dots.

  “Be my guest.”

  I pass him the Body Glide. He goes around the side of the car to lubricate those parts of the male anatomy that need protection from chafing.

  I set about filling our hydration packs from the water jugs I always keep in the trunk. Running out of water during a run is almost as bad as forgetting Body Glide.

  Once the packs are filled, I consider my pants. I’m dressed in ankle-length, black compression pants. They’re my preference for morning runs. They’re warm and provide protection from various plants on the trail, but they can get downright uncomfortable on hot runs. They would not be my first choice for any race taking place in the heat of the day.

  But compression gear improves oxygen flow and blood circulation, two things which will definitely be important on this run. And if there is indeed any “bushwhacking,” as suggested by Frederico, I’ll want to be in long pants. With a last glimpse at my extra pair of shorts, I decide not to change.

  With the pants selection complete, I move on to my shoe collection.

  Trail shoes. Road shoes. Trail-road combo shoes. Trail shoes with beefy soles for post-race recovery. Road shoes with a negative heel-toe drop. Old shoes encrusted with mud, which I use when running in storms; no reason to ruin more than one pair. Shoes I bought just because they were on sale and I liked the color scheme. Plus a few others that weren’t on sale. Running shoes for every scenario, and then some.

  After a few moments of thought, I pull out a trail-road combo pair with a thick, beefy sole. I won’t be able to carry multiple ones with me, so I need to be prepared for as much variation as possible. The medium tread will work well enough on multi-surfaces, and the beefy sole will give my foot extra cushion on the long run.

  After lacing them on, I load my pack, shoving as much as I can into the pockets. I scavenge a few maps out of the glovebox and stuff them into the compartment with the water bladder. There’s a small pocket knife in my gear box, something I always carry when running trails that take me far from civilization.

  I silently lament the loss of the things I don’t have room for, like the extra batteries and shirt. The sunglasses, handheld knuckle lights, and the portable drinking straw that purifies water with UV light. There just isn’t enough room for everything.

  Headphones are a no-go, too. They could be suicide on a course infested with zombies. I sigh, tossing them back into my car. Running two hundred miles would be nicer with music or a podcast.

  God, and what about my waterproof jacket? I just don’t have enough room. Well, shit. I’ve done my fair share of training runs and races in storms. This may be another one if a spring rain decides to open up.

  Frederico comes around the car, decked out in my fluorescent-pink shorts and matching compression sleeves with orange polka dots. If our situation wasn’t so dire, I’d be doubled over in hysterics. As it is, all I feel is a sense of overwhelming relief that zombies are blind. Frederico is impossible to miss in those clothes.

  He digs around in trunk, tossing handfuls of my gear into the backseat of the car.

  “What are you doing?” I ask.

  “Seeing what else you have in here. We could use a weapon or two.” He pulls up the bottom of the trunk, revealing a spare tire, jack, and lug nut wrench.

  “What do you think about this?” He hefts the lug nut wrench in one hand. “For crushing zombie skulls?”

  “How are we going to carry it?”

  He taps the wrench in his palm, considering. “Could we lash it to the back of a pack?”

  “Maybe.”

  There’s a zip cord meant for securing a jacket on the back of Frederico’s pack. I take an extra shirt and wrap it around the wrench like a sling. After some fiddling, I get the wrench semi-secured to the zip cord.

  “Not very stable,” I say, rocking it back and forth. “But at least it won’t swing free and hit you.”

  “Probably worth the nuisance if we get in a jam.”

  “We won’t be able to get it out very fast if we need it.”

  “We could figure out a way to hang it from my waist, but I’d get bloody and bruised from it.”

  Another good point. I sigh. “I guess this is as good as it’s going to get.”

  We stand there in contemplative silence. Nearby is the occasional hum of a car as it whizzes down the freeway. And in the far, far distance is a smaller, distinct sound: screaming.

  “Do you hear that?” I ask softly.

  He nods. “It’s spreading.”

  I set my GPS watch to zero. For the next seventy-two hours, our lives will revolve around this watch as it tracks our time and miles.

  My eyes meet Frederico’s.

  Our packs are full of water and supplies. We’re laced into our shoes.

  Time to run.

  Chapter 8

  Don’t Be an Idiot

  There’s a famous saying in the ultra world, penned by runner-writer Scott Douglas: In the first half of the race, don’t be an idiot. In the second half of the race, don’t be a wimp.

  This bit of wisdom has been hammere
d into me over my years of ultrarunning. It’s guided me through dozens of races.

  Even so, I find myself scowling when Frederico says, “We’re doing nine-minute miles. Let’s slow it to nine thirty.” He catches my look and raises an eyebrow in silent challenge.

  I swallow my frustration. He’s right. We can’t help Carter and Aleisha if we push too hard now and collapse at mile fifty.

  I force my legs to slow and my breathing to ease. The act makes me feel like a wild horse in a cage. I want to bust free and run hard and fast. I want the world to blur by on either side, to pass in a rush and transport me to Arcata, to my son.

  “Perfect,” Frederico says. “If we can hold this pace for the next fifty miles, we’ll be in good shape.”

  He’s right, of course. We settle into a familiar rhythm, running side by side down the frontage road. We pass wineries, houses—some so old they look like they’ll tip over in a stiff breeze—vineyards, and even a lonely church. I try not to think about how little food we have and how shitty we’re going to feel when it runs out. Thank goodness the next town isn’t far away.

  Despite my worry about food, tension leaches out as we move down the road. It always does when I run. There’s an odd normalcy to me and Frederico running together. As I cruise along—my shoes landing lightly on the pavement and my breath feathering in and out of my lungs—I can almost imagine the world is still normal. That zombies aren’t real, that my husband is still alive, and my son is safe in his dorm.

  The road meanders northward, sometimes drifting closer to the freeway than I’d like. There’s a chain-link fence separating us from the main highway. Will that be enough to protect us if we run into zombies?

  “Do you think the news reports are right?” I ask. “Do you think this is a bioterrorism attack?”

  “Don’t know,” Frederico replies. “It’s not outrageous to think whatever it is—a virus, bacteria, whatever—came in on a cargo ship. It wouldn’t be the first disease to get past customs.”