Dissolution

by Kyle West

  “I’m back, but broken,” Isaru said. “I don’t know how I can ever be human again. To be acceptable.”

  I touched his face, forcing him to look at me. His gray eyes were filled with a haunting sadness and pain.

  “I accept you,” I said. “No matter who you were, or who you are now. I accept you, and I want you to try. Because even if no one outside this ship needs you, we need you. Let that be enough.”

  “You need me?”

  I nodded. “Of course I do. Not having your guidance, your advice . . . even your presence . . . these last few months, has been so difficult. I didn’t know how I’d ever make it through.”

  “And yet you did.”

  “Just barely, Isaru. It would’ve been so much easier with you by my side.” I touched my hair, which was now a couple of inches long. “I might even still have my hair.”

  Isaru chuckled, unable to help myself. “I noticed, only I never said anything. I suppose cutting it makes it easier to fight. A sensible choice.”

  “If only you knew,” I said. “But there’ll be time for all the crazy stories later.”

  He looked at me for another moment before nodding. “You’re right. I know you are.”

  “Of course I’m right,” I said. “And it doesn’t all have to come at once.” I stood, keeping hold of his hand. “Welcome to the Odin, Isaru. It’s great to have you back.”

  Isaru considered what I said for a moment, before pulling himself up.

  “Elekim,” he said, giving a nod of respect.

  “If you call me that again I’m going to punch you,” I said. “If I can’t be Shanti with you, then I can’t be Shanti with anyone.”

  He gave a small smile that was gone as quickly as it had appeared. “I need to rest, though. What you said makes sense in my head, but I’ve lost so much. Even if I can come back, like you said . . . I will never be the same.”

  “None of us can,” I said, solemnly. “But we fight so that we can keep that hope alive for others.”

  Isaru nodded his agreement. “So, where can I go rest?”

  “You can sleep in my cabin for now and we can figure out the smaller details later.”

  “What about you?”

  “I’ll be fine,” I said.

  Isaru was about to protest, but I just shook my head in preparation of that. “You need a comfortable bed, and I’ll be fine. Really. Besides, I’m the captain and that’s my order.”

  “It’s not that,” he said. “I’m just a bit worried. About myself, I mean.”

  “Worried about what?”

  He hesitated here, but I waited patiently for him to speak. “What if this is all some trick on Odium’s part? What if I’m not really healed? What if Odium still possesses me, and is only making me think that I’m not, and fooling all of you?”

  I shook my head. “No. That was you in the Xenofold, and that same presence is in you now. If you can’t trust your own feelings, then trust mine.”

  “I suppose that’ll have to do.

  “Isaru?” Isa stepped into the engine room, a bit sheepishly. Her eyes widened upon seeing his disheveled state, and then she looked at me questioningly. “I apologize if I’ve interrupted anything.”

  “No,” I said. “Isaru was just about to go get some rest.”

  “Oh,” Isa said. I could tell she was thinking the obvious question of where he was going to sleep. “Fiona and I are in the second cabin. There’s still a couple of empty bunks in there.”

  “He’s going to be sleeping in my cabin for now, until we can figure out a more permanent sleeping arrangement,” I said. “I want to make sure he’s comfortable. I’ll be rooming with Shara tonight.”

  “Really, none of this is necessary,” Isaru said.

  “It’s already done,” I said.

  Isaru faced Isa, and I could tell that he wanted to speak to her alone.

  “I’ll be up front,” I said, leaving the two of them to it.

  The hum of the engine covered their words before I could make out what they said. When I made it back up to the wardroom, Shara and Fiona were sitting at the table, talking.

  “How is he?” Fiona asked, once I stepped in. “Isa went to check on you.”

  “He’s struggling,” I said. “Overwhelmed.”

  “Maybe what he needs is space,” Shara said. “That’s what I’d need.”

  “Space is hard to get on a ship,” Fiona said.

  “He’ll be going to bed soon,” I said. “Maybe he just needs time, and like Shara said, space.”

  That might get him functional, but it would not heal the emotional wounds he had suffered. Sadly, that wasn’t something we could take time to address. Not now. All we could do was comfort him and give him whatever support we could.

  “What’s our next move?” Fiona asked.

  “I don’t know,” I said. “I’m overwhelmed, too, so the only thing I can think to do is sleep on it. Truth be told, it’s hard to believe he’s back.”

  “I’m about to head to bed myself,” Shara said.

  “Sleep well,” I said, as she passed out of the door.

  “Maybe sleep is best,” Fiona said, once we were alone. “I feel as if I’m too worried to even do that. Where’s Isaru sleeping? With Pallos, I assume.”

  “My cabin for now,” I said. “I’m going to bunk with you girls tonight.”

  “Never seemed right that Pallos got that cabin all to himself,” Fiona said. “He sleeps in the bridge half the time.”

  “I’m sure he suffers a lot being the only male member of our crew,” I said. “Maybe he deserves it. He’s High Vizier and a Guardian, after all.”

  Fiona had a chuckle at that. “Well, I think Shara had the right idea. I’m off to bed.”

  “Sleep well,” I said.

  * * *

  I headed for the bridge, and as expected, Pallos was there fiddling with the controls. He looked up as I entered and gave a wan smile.

  “Where to now, Captain?” he asked.

  I didn’t respond to that question, and instead sat down. “We need to talk.”

  Pallos swallowed. “Of course.”

  I faced him from my seat. “Be honest with me. If you had to choose between Shen, or us, which would you choose?”

  Pallos blinked in surprise. “Well, I’d find a solution that meant I had to do neither. Most things aren’t an either/or proposition.”

  I’d expected an answer like that. “That’s a cop out. You know exactly what I mean.”

  He cleared his throat nervously. “I suppose you do.”

  “Pallos, you’ve proven yourself every step of the way, and you’ve said you haven’t spoken a word to Shen since we entered the Hyperfold three months ago. That could be a lie, but for some reason, I believe you. Maybe that belief will be the end of us, based on information you could still be giving to Shen.”

  “I’m not giving anything to him,” Pallos said. “For better or worse, my lot is thrown in with yours. I mean that.”

  “So, back to my original question . . .”

  “Yes,” Pallos said. “If I had to choose, I’d choose you.”

  I hadn’t expected him to answer so quickly. “And why’s that?”

  “Because I’ve learned that the world is bigger than Shen and his vision ever since following you. I used to believe Shen had a solution for everything. Now, I’m not so sure. Shen doesn’t understand the Xenofold, therefore, he wants it to end. I’m not so sure that would be best for this world. We would be losing a lot, not to mention that the Xenofold might have a chance to come back stronger. That is, if we successfully convince Rakhim to end the Hyperfold.”

  Yes, there was that. “Then I want you to back up those words with action. An action which cannot be reversed, and will cut you off from Shen . . . forever.”

  “What do you mean?” Pallos asked.

  “Become an Elekai,” I said. “Become one of us.”

  Pallos’ eyes widened; he clearly hadn’t expected me to say that. “Is tha
t even possible?”

  I nodded. “I did the same thing to my dad when I healed him in Haven. Unintentionally, of course. And as Elekim, I can open the Xenofold to whoever I choose. It’s also how I was able to restore Isaru’s consciousness to his body. If you do this, Pallos, there will be no doubt in my mind. And there will be no going back to Shen.”

  “I understand that,” he said.

  “If you believe everything you just told me, that the Xenofold deserves to exist, then that puts you at odds with Shen. That means you would have no place with him any longer.”

  “I’m aware of that,” Pallos said. “But this is a very big step, Shanti.”

  “I need you to decide before tomorrow morning,” I said. “That’s when we’re leaving.” Now came the hard part. “If you don’t agree . . . then I don’t think I’ll be able to trust you. Not fully, at least.”

  “I see,” Pallos said. He thought for a moment as he considered what to say. “I’m not hesitating because I’m unsure. I am sure. I’m hesitating only because I never thought things would lead to this. But if it is possible, and I do become an Elekai, I would be much more useful to you and your mission. I can still be the liaison between us and Shen, even as an Elekai. I don’t know how he’ll react to it, but I meant what I said. If it were you, or him, I’d choose you and your mission. Because it’s become my mission, too.”

  “I’m glad to hear that, Pallos.”

  “So, yes,” he said. “Make me Elekai.”

  “Right now?”

  He nodded. “Right now.”

  I looked into his eyes to see if he was sure. There was no doubt within them.

  “Follow me, then.”

  * * *

  I led Pallos off the ship and to the ichor lake outside. The night was dark, and the only light came from the thousands of stars above and the glowing, pink liquid before us.

  “What do I do?” Pallos asked.

  “Step into the ichor,” I said. “It may burn at first, but you must be strong. Keep going until you’re completely submerged.”

  “People die when they enter ichor,” Pallos said. “If it were anyone else, I would believe you were simply trying to get rid of me.” He turned to look at me. There was fear in those eyes, reflecting the pink light of the lake. “But I’m choosing to trust you.”

  I felt a bit guilty that Pallos had placed more trust in me than I had in him. But this had to be done. “You can step in when you’re ready.”

  “Should I remove my clothes?”

  I shook my head, perhaps a little too vehemently. “That won’t be necessary.”

  “Right.” He drew a deep breath, and looked at the stars, gazing at them for perhaps a full minute. Probably trying to get one last look in case they were the last thing he ever saw.

  “I’ve had a strange life,” he mused. “Adopted into the Guardians when I was young, educated at the finest schools in Shenshi, all to apply that knowledge toward the restoration of Odin as my crowning achievement. As soon as that was complete . . . along you came, upending my life far more than any other event.” He chuckled. “And now I’m renouncing my people, the ones who rose me up and gave me life. Not because I don’t have a choice, but because I’ve come to believe in a world larger than Shen.”

  He shrugged, seeming to have nothing more to add. Pallos moved forward into the lake, and as he made contact, I reached out to make a connection with the Xenofold and the ichor now touching his skin.

  He cried out in pain, but as I’d told him, he only continued to wade deeper. My thoughts became the ichor, wrapping around his skin and ceasing to do him harm. I felt his pain subside while being conscious of the latent power of the Xenofold, awaiting my command.

  He is one of us, now, I thought.

  I felt acceptance from the Xenofold, and like that, the flood of power entered Pallos. His skin began to glow brightly as he cried out, not from pain, but from shock.

  The glow began to fade after a minute or so, and all that was left was Pallos as he had been before. He looked at his hands, where the last trace of the luminescence still resided.

  “Is it done?” he asked.

  I nodded, feeling none the weaker for having done a task that would have utterly exhausted me before inheriting the powers of Elekim. “It’s done. You’re Elekai.”

  “I feel different,” he said. “Warmer, if that makes sense.”

  “The Xenofold has accepted you, Pallos. Like us, you are connected to it, but it will take training to learn how to use it. What do you feel?”

  Pallos closed his eyes, and a frown came to his face. “It feels . . . sick. Weak. Yet it still gives its power to me.”

  I nodded. “This is what we’re fighting to protect, Pallos. This is what the Radaskim want to destroy. Now, the fight will be as personal for you as it is for us.”

  “I see,” he said. “I understand, now. I understand better, at least.”

  “Your connection to the Xenofold is as it was in the old days,” I said. “Stronger and purer than any Elekai born today.”

  He gave an ironic chuckle. “Then Shen will hate me all the more.”

  A long streak of light cut across the sky at that very moment, striking us both silent. It landed somewhere far off behind some mountains. A great rumble sounded from the ground, followed by a thunderous boom, as if the very air were being ripped apart. The surrounding trees shook, and a great, hot wind gusted across ichor lake.

  Pallos turned to me, his face fearful and questioning.

  “Back to the ship!” I shouted, though my voice was lost to the din.

  I waited for Pallos to rejoin me on the shore before running back to Odin.

  CHAPTER FORTY-ONE

  “WHAT’S GOING ON OUT THERE?” Isa asked as Pallos and I ran inside the ship.

  The ground was no longer shaking, though the wind outside still roared around the hull of the ship. “Something fell from the sky. We need to get off the ground immediately.”

  “The forest is on fire,” Pallos said.

  Everyone had gathered into the wardroom from their cabins by now, including Isaru, who now spoke.

  “It must be happening now,” he said, another aftershock rolling under the ship.

  “What’s happening?” Shara asked.

  This was no time for speculation. We needed to get airborne as soon as possible. I ran for the bridge and fired up the engines. It took only a moment for the thrusters to engage and push us off the ground. Two more streaks of light coursed down from the sky, lighting the horizon red first, and then later, giving resounding booms that penetrated even into the ship.

  “The invasion begins,” Isaru said.

  “They’re here?” Shara asked, joining me on the bridge as well.

  All was quiet in the ship as we watched the destruction unfold with horror. Giant plumes of fire and smoke beat back the night, creating a second day.

  “The dragons . . .” I said.

  “Can you reach out to them?” Shara asked.

  I closed my eyes, focusing my attention on just that.

  Quietus? Askal? Are you out there? Are you safe?

  Silence was my only answer. It wasn’t the silence of their not answering. It was a silence of being cut off, as if something was getting in the way of the connection. And then, in the quiet of Silence, a shadowy face appeared, grotesque and alien. The eyes shone like the fires now consuming the Sylvan forest.

  Anna . . .

  The voice was like a cold wind, hissing and hateful. I tried to sever the connection, but I couldn’t pull my mind away from it.

  I told you that I would come.

  I steeled my mind to fight back. If I said nothing, the power of his voice would overwhelm.

  None of this world is yours, Odium! You have lost Rakhim. You have lost Isaru. You stand alone, and I am coming for you!

  There was a moment of hesitation, and perhaps of doubt. Perhaps doubt was too much to hope for, but I was no longer afraid. I was angry.

  I used
that anger, that power, to break off the connection. The last thing I heard out of Odium was a seething hiss.

  I opened my eyes to find myself on the deck of the ship, facing upward. Isaru reached down and pulled me up. I stood, dazed, while he and Shara supported me.

  “Odium is here,” I said. “On Earth.”

  “Then this is Xenofall . . .” Fiona said, after a moment of silence.

  “I suggest we leave the area,” Pallos said. “More of these meteors could fall, and it would be bad luck to lose our ship.”

  “No,” I said. “We’re not running from this.” The others turned to look at me, most of their expressions were of surprise, or even fear. “Odium has landed near here. I can find him. While we have this ship, and while he is relatively alone, is the best time to strike.”

  “Where is he, exactly?” Isa asked.

  “Somewhere beyond there,” I said pointing. “Among all the fires. Where the rocks dropped.”

  “Doesn’t he want us to attack him?” Fiona asked.

  “He landed here for a reason,” I said. “To attack the dragons. I’m afraid they’re in trouble. When I tried to reach Quietus and Askal just now, neither answered. We can’t abandon them now.”

  “Then what are we waiting for?” Isaru asked.

  “Pallos,” I said. “Set course for Dragonspire.”

  Pallos nodded. “At once.”

  “Hey . . .” Shara said, seeming to notice Pallos for the first time. “You seem different.”

  “I feel it, too,” Fiona asked, looking from Pallos, then to me. “Is he . . .?”

  I nodded. “Yes. Pallos has become Elekai. No one can doubt his loyalty now.”

  The bridge was struck silent as everyone absorbed this fact.

  “I don’t know as much as everyone else here,” Isaru said, “but let me be the first to welcome you.”

  “Me, too,” Fiona said quietly.