Hill Country Redemption

by Shannon Taylor Vannatter

  “Not to be morbid or anything, but do you have any arrangements for Jayda if anything happens to you?”

  “Hoping I’ll die so you can have her?” she snapped.

  “Absolutely not,” he growled. “But if I’d jerked the wheel, that 18-wheeler would have—” He couldn’t finish the sentence. “It got me thinking.”

  “I’m way ahead of you. After my dad got sick, I made arrangements for Lexie to take her.”

  “A good choice. But now that I’m in the picture, I’d like that changed.”

  “We’ll see.”

  “There’s no ‘we’ll see’ about it, Larae.” He gripped the steering wheel tighter again. “Am I even listed as her father on her birth certificate?”

  “Yes.”

  “Then legally, I’d get her.”

  “My lawyer wrote up papers saying that since you’d had no contact with her and since Lexie has been in her life, my wishes are for Lexie to get custody.”

  His chest burned. “I didn’t have any contact with her because you didn’t tell me about her.”

  Silence.

  “You didn’t tell your lawyer that little nugget, did you?”

  “Not exactly.”

  “Please get it changed, Larae. She’s my daughter.”

  “You really think you could raise her on your own?” She blew out a frustrated sigh. “Because I remember this guy who went from girl to girl to girl, and I’m having a hard time with leaving my child in that guy’s care.”

  “I’m not that guy anymore.” Would she ever see anything other than the worst in him? “Surely you realize that.”

  “I’m trying. But I still expect you to pick up and leave or chase some skirt anytime. And leave Jayda in your wake.”

  “There hasn’t been anyone in my life for five years, Larae. Five years.” He passed an 18-wheeler and crossed to the slow lane again. “And the few between you and the last five years weren’t anything serious. I’m not going anywhere. Why can’t you just believe me?”

  “Because I believed every pretty little word you whispered in my ear back in high school, and I ended up pregnant and alone.”

  And he couldn’t tell her why. “Don’t you realize that if I’d known you were carrying my child, you wouldn’t have been alone?”

  “I didn’t want you to marry me out of duty. You’d have ended up resenting me.” She squeezed her eyes closed. “But you probably do anyway because I kept her a secret.”

  “I guess you did what you thought was right for Jayda.”

  “I’ll get the papers changed. But can I leave her to your parents instead of you?”

  “Seriously?”

  “No. But I’d feel better about it.”

  “Well, nothing’s going to happen to you, so none of this will even matter. It just matters to my heart. I want to know Jayda will always have at least one parent to love her.”

  “And that’s all I want.”

  He covered her hand with his. “Finally, we agree on something.”

  Why did they always have to take two steps forward and one step back? But she didn’t move her hand. It felt really nice. And did funny things to his pulse.

  * * *

  While the crew worked into the afternoon on the corral and a maze of pens, Larae leaned on the arena fence. Would this thing come together in three more days? Friday night, she was supposed to host her first rodeo. While the arena, concession stand, announcer’s booth and bleachers were ready, building pens would take two days, and the old entry and exit chutes still had to be updated. Plus, the parking area needed a load of gravel.

  She probably should have put off her grand opening for at least a week, but the ranch was still bleeding red. She was determined to turn a profit as soon as possible.

  When they’d gotten home last night, Rance had helped her round up all the hamburgers and hot dogs Stella and Denny had stored in employees’ freezers, while the hands had unloaded the new freezer and maneuvered it into the concession stand. There was no way she could have gotten this far by herself. Her employees had been invaluable. And so had Rance. She just hated admitting it.

  The heat of a blush swept over her at the memory of his hand on hers in the truck yesterday. Why hadn’t she moved?

  Heavy equipment swirled dust around the foundation of the indoor arena with construction beginning. Was she crazy to go ahead with the building? Should she wait and make sure the outdoor arena was a success before going ahead with the project? Too late now.

  Yet, with her ranch hanging by a thread, Rance inserting himself deeper into her life daily and Jayda sporting a neon pink cast, the most pressing thing on her mind was Delia Rhinehart.

  Why could she not get the conversation with Angie out of her mind?

  “What should I do, Lord?” More than anything, she did not want to see Delia Rhinehart. “Maybe I could write her a letter.”

  Peace threaded through her.

  A deep sigh seeped out of her. “I guess I’ll take that as a yes.”

  “I don’t think they can hear you.” Rance shouted above the noise.

  “Why must you always sneak up on me?” She swung around. “I wasn’t talking to them. I was praying. Sort of.”

  “I can’t help it if you’re always standing with your back to me. I’m glad you and God are on speaking terms, though.”

  “Me, too.” She turned back toward the arena.

  He took up residence at the fence beside her.

  “Think it’ll get done in time?” she said.

  “I do.”

  “How come you’re so confident?”

  “Because we’re both praying about it.”

  “That’s not exactly what I was praying about. I mean I have. But not just now.” She drew in a deep breath. “I need to forgive Delia Rhinehart. To write her a letter saying that I do. For now. And maybe eventually go see her.”

  “That’s—”

  “Crazy?”

  “Intense.”

  “I haven’t been able to get her off my mind since we saw Angie.”

  “I could take you?”

  “I’m not ready to see her. I’ve got the rodeo. My first weekend.”

  “Does it have to be the weekend?”

  “I’m not sure. That’s when Angie said she was going.”

  “What nursing home is it?”

  Larae gave him the name, then tilted her head back and did a neck roll from side to side. Numerous pops and cracks sounded. What she wouldn’t give for a good shoulder massage.

  Rance scrolled through his phone. “It doesn’t say on the website, but maybe you and Angie could go together sometime. That way you wouldn’t be alone. I could drive you.”

  “Maybe I’ll be ready someday, but I don’t know how to get in touch with Angie anyway.”

  “She might be at church tomorrow night. And if she’s not, I can ask around, or we can call and check with the nursing home.”

  “To be honest, I’m not sure what I’d do if I went. Or even what to write in a letter. Yell and scream at her. Or forgive her.”

  “You’ll do the right thing.”

  “How can you be so sure?”

  “Because I know you. And you know Jesus.” He stepped behind her, and his hands settled on her shoulders.

  She stiffened.

  “Relax.” His fingers kneaded the sore muscles in her shoulders. “All your stress still goes to your neck and shoulders.”

  In spite of herself, she turned to pudding as his thumbs worked out her kinks.

  Gravel crunched under tires behind them, and his hands fell away as they turned around. Maggie and Davis were bringing Jayda home.

  As soon as the car stopped rolling, the back door flew open and Jayda popped out. She aimed herself toward them at a dead run.

  “Slow down, sw
eetie. You don’t want to fall.”

  But Jayda kept running. “Look at my cast. Everybody in my class has signed it now. Plus my teacher.” She finally stopped as they reached her.

  “Did your arm hurt today?” Rance asked.

  “Uh-uh.” Jayda shook her head. “Look.”

  They both knelt as she showed them the signatures most important to her and explained who each child was. When she finished, she hurled herself at them for a group hug.

  “Whoa.” In trying to steady Jayda, Rance lost his balance and bumped into Larae.

  They landed sprawled beside each other with Jayda on top of him.

  “Sorry, Daddy.” Jayda giggled.

  “Is everybody okay?” Davis called.

  “All except for my pride.” Larae laughed. “Thanks for bringing her home.”

  “Be careful with that cast, Baby Girl. That thing’s a weapon.”

  “She hit you with it?” Larae rolled onto her side to look him over.

  “Just my chin.”

  “It’s a wonder you didn’t knock Daddy out.”

  His green eyes warmed at her calling him that.

  “Lie down, Mommy. Let’s watch the clouds.” Jayda’s innocent request tugged at her heart.

  They’d never been able to see the clouds very well in the city. Larae lay on her back, mostly to escape Rance’s gaze. Jayda flopped over, careful not to hit her, lying half on Rance and half on Larae.

  “We’ll see you tomorrow,” Maggie called from the car window.

  The car engine faded down the driveway, leaving them to this perfect moment. With Rance by her side and Jayda’s weight on her chest, Larae could live forever in this moment. With the man she loved by her side, cuddling with the child of their hearts. Could he be a permanent fixture in their lives? Could they be a family—the way it should be—forever?

  Between them, the back of his hand rested against hers. He moved his arm enough to thread his fingers through hers.

  She stiffened, and then, of their own volition, her fingers tightened around his. He turned to look at her. She met his gaze, and fireworks went off in her heart. Eyes she could drown in. He’d done nothing but support her since she’d been back. With Jayda, with the rodeo and with her Delia dilemma.

  Maybe, just maybe, she wasn’t as completely opposed to trying again with him as she’d been a few weeks ago.

  But could they stop arguing all the time? And could she trust him to stick around on a permanent basis?

  Chapter Eighteen

  Two days remained until the rodeo’s grand opening, and the pens were all in place as the crew pulled out of the drive. He’d tried to get a moment alone with Larae all day, but it seemed as if she was avoiding him. Now she’d disappeared.

  Had he been wrong? Hadn’t they had a moment yesterday, lying in the grass with their daughter, hands clasped and eyes locked? If Jayda hadn’t been there, he’d have kissed her.

  Once Jayda came home from school, she’d have to surface. But then they’d be consumed with Jayda. He strolled past the barn and heard soft humming.

  He stopped and gingerly approached the open galley door, careful to walk softly. A figure stood at the last stall, face pressed against a horse’s muzzle, highlighted by the light outside. Larae. His breath caught at her beauty, at the love she obviously felt for her horse. He was almost jealous of the big buckskin.

  “Want to take her for a ride?”

  She jumped, her standard response to him.

  “Sorry, but for the record, I didn’t come up behind you.” He held his hands up in surrender.

  “I wish. But I don’t have time for a ride.”

  “Sure you do. The guys are done for the day.” As his eyes adjusted to the dim lighting, he checked his watch. “School’s just getting out, but we’ve still got an hour before Mom and Dad bring Jayda home. And when she gets home, she can ride Beans with us.”

  “We should call them to let them know I’m done for the day and they should bring her straight home. She could ride with us now.”

  “We could. But you’ve been nonstop mom for seven years. All by yourself.” He kept his tone light, no hint of accusation. “On top of that, you took care of your dad all those months after he moved in with you in Dallas. And you’ve been a frenzied rodeo organizer for almost three weeks. When’s the last time you completely relaxed?”

  She sagged against the horse. “I can’t even remember.”

  “Saddle Molly up. We both need some fresh air.”

  “You remember her name.”

  “I remember everything that has to do with you, Larae.” He strolled into the galley between the stalls. “Which one can I take?”

  “The bay on your left.”

  He shot her a playful grin. “You’re not setting me up with the wildest one you’ve got just so you can watch me land on my backside, are you?”

  One eyebrow lifted. “Guess you’ll have to see.”

  “Challenge accepted.”

  “There should be a saddle and gear in his stall.”

  “Hey, big guy.” Rance stroked the horse’s russet muzzle as he entered the stall. “How about a ride?” The horse stayed calm and still as Rance set a blanket on his broad back, then strapped on the saddle and slipped the halter into place around the ears and dark mane, and finally the bridle. “You’re just a big softie, aren’t you?”

  As he led the horse from the stall, Larae was already astride Molly and waiting for him.

  “What’s his name?”

  “Lancelot. He was Dad’s.”

  Their eyes locked. That she’d let him ride her dad’s horse had to mean something. Didn’t it?

  “He hasn’t been ridden since Dad got sick, so I figure it’s time.”

  And she busted his bubble. She was getting so good at that.

  They rode side by side out of the barn.

  “Race ya to the river.” Her horse shot off ahead of him.

  “Hey.” He coaxed Lancelot into a gallop. “What happened to get ready, set, go?”

  “You should always be ready.” She shouted as her blond hair bounced in the wind behind her. She was a vision on her golden horse with its midnight mane and tail. “I win.” She slowed Molly to a trot until he caught up.

  “I think that was the most unfair race I’ve ever run.”

  Larae laughed and brought Molly to a halt at the water’s edge.

  They guided their horses into the river at a shallow point to cross.

  “I wrote my letter to Delia last night.”

  “And?”

  “I set out to rail at her for trying to ruin my mom’s reputation. But when I started writing, it didn’t come out that way. I forgave her—in the letter, and in my heart.”

  “I’m glad.” He stopped beside her and reached for her hand. “It’ll help you, more than it will her.”

  She stared at his outstretched fingers for a moment, then slipped her hand into his.

  Maybe if she could forgive Delia, she could forgive him.

  “Hear that?”

  “What?” All he could hear was his overactive heart drumming in his ears.

  “Silence.”

  They listened together for several minutes. But it wasn’t really silence. The songs and chirps of birds filled the air, along with a chorus of crickets.

  “I’ve missed this.”

  “Me, too.” But he meant her. He pointed in the distance. “I remember I was standing right over there.”

  “When?”

  “When I saw you for the first time.”

  She blushed but didn’t pull away.

  “It was the summer I came to work for your dad before I transferred to private school. One of your daddy’s cows had calved, and I was trying to get the calf back to the barn. The mama was fighting me, and I was having a hard
time getting the baby up on my horse. I heard a noise and saw the blur of blond hair waving in the wind with Molly at full blast.”

  “I don’t remember that.”

  “You didn’t notice me. But I noticed you, riding like the wind. No fear. And after that one glimpse, I was determined to meet you.”

  “We better get back.” She tugged her hand from his and turned Molly around toward the way they’d come. “Jayda will be home soon.”

  They trotted their horses back in silence, with him wondering what he’d said wrong.

  “Aren’t we taking her for a ride?”

  “On second thought, I’m not sure it’s a good idea with her arm in a cast.”

  They reached the barn. Inside, they worked at getting the gear off their respective horses in silence.

  He was tired of silence.

  At the same moment, they exited their stalls. She stopped. He didn’t, stepping close to Larae and taking her hand in his.

  “Listen, Larae. That pull we’ve always felt—it’s still there. And I’m tired of ignoring it. To be honest, I’m not sure why we’re ignoring it.”

  “Kiss her, Daddy.” Jayda clapped her hands.

  Larae sprang away from him. “Jayda, you’re early.”

  “Uh-huh.” Her grin stayed in place, as if she knew a secret.

  “Where are Grandma and Grandpa?” Rance asked.

  “On the porch. We saw y’all riding in, and they said I could come out to meet you.”

  “If we’d known you were early, we’d have come back sooner.” Larae smoothed a hand over her hair.

  “Or waited for you so you could ride with us.” Rance shot Jayda a wink.

  “It’s okay.” Her grin slipped away. “I don’t want to ride. We came home early ’cause it’s church night.”

  Rance caught Larae’s gaze and a moment of understanding passed between them. Jayda was over her fear of bulls, but now she was afraid to ride.

  “Want to go for a quick ride on my horse?” Rance motioned toward the porch. “Maybe Grandma and Grandpa will want to come, too. We’ve still got plenty of time before church.”

  “Nope. I don’t want to.” She looked down, then back up with a devious gleam in her eye. “If I’d gone with you, maybe you wouldn’t have kissed Mommy.”