Osmosis

by Susan X Meagher

“Oh.” Maeve didn’t say another word, but her expression didn’t change one bit.

  “That doesn’t bother you?”

  Maeve’s eyes shot open wide. “Me? Why would it bother me?”

  “I’m sure you’re not the type of person who’d date a married man, Maeve.”

  “Oh, Catherine, what I’d do has nothing to do with it. I was married to a man I stopped loving within five years of our marriage. He was an alcoholic and a very cruel man when he drank. My beautiful young son contracted a terminal disease by having unprotected sex with a large number of men when he was just a boy. I didn’t judge either of them for their behavior—even though I went through more pain than I thought possible with both Charlie and Michael. I don’t have the slightest interest in forming an opinion about your choices … unless you’re hurting yourself. Then I’d get involved and try to reason with you.”

  “You’re a good, good friend,” Catherine said. She fumbled through her purse, finding a handkerchief and dabbing at her eyes. “Thank you for reassuring me.”

  Maeve patted her hand. “Now tell me about this man. He must be special.”

  “He is. He’s the man I should have married.” Her lips thinned as she grinned slyly. “But he was still in grade school when I married Jim.”

  “Oh!” Maeve chuckled, shaking her head a little bit. “And what’s wrong with that? Men have been dating girls since the beginning of time.”

  “True. But he’s not a boy, he’s definitely a man. He cares for me deeply, Maeve. But he’s committed to his family, and I respect him for that.”

  “What about his wife?”

  Catherine laughed nervously. “They have a unique relationship. His wife has a long-term lover and Giacomo has me. He and his wife are both aware of each other’s outside interests, but they don’t talk about it specifically. It’s an open secret.”

  “Are there children?”

  “Yes. They have two. Giacomo has to travel for business, and he comes to the U.S. fairly frequently. And I used to go to Milan for a few weeks at a time several times a year. He’d take a long lunch or visit me after the children were in bed.”

  “Does he love his wife?”

  Lifting her shoulders, Catherine said, “He says he does. Very much. He claims they’re happy, but that they’re not happy being monogamous.”

  “Well,” Maeve said, looking a little puzzled, “it’s not a relationship that would work for me, but again, I’m not the one to judge what works for others. I’m concerned about you. How do you feel about continuing to see him?”

  “I don’t want to let him go,” Catherine said, her voice soft but sure. “I don’t want to stop something that works for me on the chance that something better will come along.”

  “Then that’s what you should do. That’s all there is to it.”

  “Oh, but Jamie will not like that one bit, Maeve. Not one bit.”

  “Jamie’s opinion isn’t what’s important, yours is. Consider how you feel about this. If you think you’re doing something wrong … I’d think twice. But if you feel right about it … if your conscience is clear … that’s all that matters. All that matters.

  Part Nine

  At 3:30 Jamie stole another glance and saw that Ryan was still zoned out. She got up and went over to her, calling her name. As before, Ryan snapped out of it and looked at her.

  “Huh?”

  “You’d better get ready for practice. It’s 3:30.”

  “Damn.” Ryan rolled off the bed and grumbled to herself while going to her room to get her clothes ready. She came back a few minutes later, dressed and ready to go. “Sorry I’m grouchy. Vijay’s coming over tonight and I really wanted to have this idea worked out in my head so he could help me with the programming.”

  Jamie smiled up at her. “Anything I can do to help?”

  Ryan bent over and put her mouth on the top of her head, then made a loud sucking sound. “I could use another brain. My processor’s working at full capacity.”

  “You’d better save that trick for Vijay. Mine wouldn’t help a bit.”

  “You’re a whiz, baby,” Ryan said, grinned at her. “Your brain’s just not fixated on the same things mine is.”

  Jamie ran a hand up Ryan’s thigh. “Sometimes it is,” she purred, giving her a sultry look.

  “Thank God for that!” Ryan kissed her soundly and turned for the door. “Don’t lose that thought!”

  Jamie didn’t lose the thought. In fact, she simmered with it all afternoon. Their sex life had been on the fritz ever since the carjacking, but things were starting to click again and she found Ryan so spectacularly appealing now that her confidence was coming back that she could barely focus on her work. But Ryan was made of tougher stuff and she seemed perfectly able to balance her fixation on her project and a reawakening sex drive. Which irritated Jamie just the tiniest bit.

  Ryan got home a little after six o’clock, dropped her gym bag by the door, and strolled into the kitchen. “Hi,” she said, giving Jamie a quick kiss and grabbing the first edible thing she could get her hands on.

  Jamie smiled at her, watching her demolish a carrot in moments. “Salad okay?”

  “Sure. I’ve gotta rush. Vijay’s gonna be here in half an hour. Mind if I go take a shower before we eat?”

  “No, go ahead. I’m still working on the veggies.”

  Ryan kissed her again, grabbed a big wedge of jicama and took off, leaving Jamie smiling at her partner’s insatiable appetite.

  Around ten o’clock, Jamie went to the study and found Ryan and Vijay hard at work. They had three laptops going, which seemed a little excessive to Jamie, but she didn’t comment. “Are you two anywhere near finished?”

  Ryan glanced up and frowned. “Ooo … uhm … no, we’re not. Should we … stop?”

  “No, no, just take a little break and walk me upstairs, okay?”

  Ryan looked more torn than Jamie was happy with, but she got up and said to Vijay, “Back in a sec.”

  “Goodnight, Jamie,” he said. “Thanks for the snack.”

  “You’re welcome. And don’t feel like you have to stop just because of me. I know how Ryan is when she gets involved, and if you’re anything like her …”

  “I’m worse,” he said, laughing.

  “God help us!” She took Ryan’s hand and they walked upstairs.

  Ryan put her hand on Jamie’s neck and gave it a scratch. “Wanna be tucked in, little girl?”

  “Not really.” Jamie smiled at her. “I wanted some kisses. If you won’t go to bed with me, the least you can do is warm up my lips.”

  “Always happy to.”

  They reached the bedroom and Jamie dropped her sweats and slid between the sheets. “Begin,” she said, puckering up.

  Sitting on the side of the bed, Ryan leaned over, placing her hand next to Jamie’s pillow to support herself. She drew close and paused, gazing into Jamie’s eyes. “I wish I could go to bed with you.”

  Jamie started to lift her left hand, then chuckled when she realized she’d hit Ryan on the head if she lifted it. Switching to her right, she brought it to Ryan’s cheek and stroked it tenderly. “Me too. I always miss you when you don’t.”

  “I’ll be up as soon as we finish. Can’t guarantee when that’ll be, though.”

  “It’s all right, really. I know how important this is to you, baby. You’ve been working on this for two semesters. I don’t want you to drop the ball now.”

  “Thanks for understanding.” Ryan dipped her head and placed a delicate, slow kiss on Jamie’s lips. “Thanks for loving me.”

  Jamie threaded her fingers through Ryan’s hair and held her still. “I do love you. I always will.” They kissed, slowly and gently, for a few moments, then Jamie pressed Ryan a little more firmly against her mouth. “I always want you when I can’t have you,” she whispered. “I could eat you alive right now.”

  Ryan chuckled, then playfully nipped at her lover’s nose. “You’re getting as bad as me— forbidden frui
t and all that.”

  “You’re a good bad influence.” Jamie kissed her again, harder this time, intentionally trying to make Ryan hot. She knew it was a little cruel, but she wanted to be missed. Her arm slipped down and she held on to Ryan’s shoulder, holding her still. Then her tongue darted all around Ryan’s lips, teasing her with a feather-light touch.

  “No fair,” Ryan growled. “You’re taunting the wildlife.”

  Impish green eyes looked up at her. “Mmm … I know you love math. I just want you to realize what you’re giving up.”

  “I realize exactly what I’m giving up,” Ryan murmured. “And I’m doubting my sanity. I’m just too polite to kick Vijay out right in the middle of draining his brain.”

  “Go,” Jamie said, kissing her one last time. “I’ll be here when you’re finished.”

  Ryan smiled. “If I weren’t sure of that, politeness would lose out.”

  It was after 2:00 when Ryan locked the door after seeing Vijay out. She was jazzed, higher than she’d been in months. If the bars had been open, she would have offered to take Vijay out for a celebratory drink for coming to what she was almost certain was the final solution to her project. But they weren’t open and Vijay didn’t drink, so she was left to celebrate on her own.

  Nervous energy flowed from her body, and she had to do something to release it. She was seriously thinking of going for a run when she remembered that she could play the drums in her room and not disturb Jamie. So she grabbed a beer and headed upstairs, nearly skipping with happiness.

  Carefully closing both bathroom doors, she turned on her kit and put her headphones on. Picking up her sticks, she spent a moment twirling and tossing them, just to show off, then she started to play, venting her energy and her glee on the poor rubber pads that adequately substituted for skins.

  After forty-five minutes, Ryan’s tank top was soaked through. She let out a breath and wiped the perspiration from her forehead with the back of her arm, then gasped when she saw Mia lying on the bed on her belly, smiling at her. Ryan took off her headphones. “When did you get here?”

  “A while ago. You’re fun to watch.”

  “Gee, thanks.” Ryan stood and stretched. “Good workout.”

  “It’s a good thing we’re both monogamous, ’cause I’d jump you right about now.” Mia gave Ryan a cherubic smile. “You are sizzling hot, O’Flaherty.”

  “Uhm … thanks,” Ryan said, ducking her head in embarrassment.

  “Hey, that didn’t upset you, did it?”

  “Well, no, it didn’t upset me … but it’s kinda weird.”

  “Why? It’s just a fact. There are thousands of hot women, but I wouldn’t trade Jordy for any of ’em. I’m sure you feel the same about Jamie.”

  “I do.”

  “So? I think you’re smart and funny and nice and red hot. It’s just a part of who you are. Doesn’t make me like you better. I’d love you if you looked like a dog’s butt.”

  Ryan grinned. “Glad to know I’m not on that end of your scale. Hey, if you’re gonna be up for a few, can I use your shower? I don’t wanna wake Jamie.”

  “Wake Jamie? You could jump on the bed and not wake her. But you’re welcome to use mine if you want it.”

  “Eh … you’re right. Jamie’s impervious to noise.”

  “Use mine.” She batted her eyes seductively and lowered her voice. “I’ll wash your back.”

  Squealing, Ryan jumped up and ran for her own bathroom, locking the door while she giggled.

  Part 9

  When she was clean, she thought of the things she could do, but none of them appealed to her. She knew she wouldn’t be able to concentrate enough to read, there was no television in any room but her and Jamie’s, and the last thing she wanted was to answer e-mail or surf the Web. So she decided to just lie in bed and feel good about what she’d accomplished. It wasn’t often that she took the time to review something she was very proud of, but tonight seemed like the perfect time. It was a remarkably warm night, and she looked forward to lying in bed and letting the soft sounds of the evening eventually lull her to sleep.

  She opened the door to their room and was surprised to find Jamie sleeping on her right side, both of Ryan’s pillows serving as props for her injured arm. Her mouth curled into a grin when the wan moonlight showed that her partner was completely naked, something of a rarity for her. The sheet was pushed down to her thighs, exposing a lovely expanse of skin for Ryan to admire.

  Deciding she’d like a better look, Ryan walked around the bed and perched on the window sill, taking in her partner’s bewitching body. There were few things Ryan liked better than the gentle curve of a woman’s hips, and Jamie’s curve was as perfect as Ryan had ever seen. Full and womanly, it never failed to capture her attention and she sat peacefully, gazing at the curve and the small movement of Jamie’s back each time she took in a breath.

  Her eyes automatically slid lower and fixed themselves on the twin globes of her ass—also world-class in Ryan’s learned opinion. A hint of moonlight provided just enough illumination to let Ryan feast on her lover’s beauty, which she was content to do for long minutes. But she began to feel an urge to touch the loveliness she regarded and, since Jamie was such a sound sleeper, she knew she could engage in a little tactile appreciation with impunity.

  There was barely enough room for her to sit just below Jamie’s ass, and when she did, her lover didn’t move a muscle. Ryan positioned herself so she could use both hands, and she started with her left—gently running it along Jamie’s flank from her ribs to her thigh. A zing of excitement hit Ryan in a very nice place—the thrill of touching such a lovely body enough to generate the feeling. But Ryan loved to be doing something just a little bit wrong. Even if she had to trick herself into believing it was wrong.

  In fact, Jamie had given her explicit permission to touch her in her sleep, but Ryan had never done it. Given how magnetic the attraction she felt tonight was, she was glad she’d saved the experience for a special occasion.

  Taking her time, Ryan played with the supple skin, tracing patterns and following the subtle indentations of vertebrae. Moving down, she obviously hit a sensitive spot, because Jamie shivered and straightened out her bottom leg. That made things a little more interesting, and Ryan took advantage of the new position. Scooting back, she rested her face on the warm, soft skin that had just been revealed. Her mouth began to water as she breathed in Jamie’s welcoming, distinctive scent, and she inched forward to tickle her just a tiny bit with her nose. The curly, sandy blonde hairs nearly made her sneeze, but Ryan furiously rubbed her nose, managing to stop the reflex.

  Her hand was more tempted than her nose had been, and she reached between Jamie’s legs and delicately caressed the skin. Only a few inches of the very desirable space was available to her, but she managed to build quite a buzz from stroking and probing those few inches. A shudder went through her and she shook her head, grinning from ear to ear. She felt like a child who’d snuck out of bed to wait for Santa Claus, but her clit had never throbbed like it was for Santa. Only Jamie had that effect.

  Suddenly overcome with emotion, Ryan leaned over and gently embraced her partner, kissing her pale skin again and again as she thanked whatever power had brought them together. She never would have believed that a woman could entrance her like this—while asleep—but she was overwhelmingly grateful that together they would stay.

  She wasn’t sure if it was the hug or the surfeit of kisses, but Jamie stirred again, this time straightening both legs and stretching while a gentle sigh left her lips. Just the sigh set Ryan’s heart beating, and she smirked at herself for falling so helplessly in love. She bent over again and placed one last kiss on Jamie’s hip, then started to get up. But as she did, Jamie rolled over a little, almost lying flat on her back. Ryan managed to get out of her way and she went back to her side of the bed and got in. Leaning down to pull the sheet up, she stopped cold when Jamie slid her hand down her own belly and rested it between
her slightly spread legs.

  Sitting up like a dog who has heard a distant whistle, Ryan watched, transfixed, waiting to see what her partner would do. Nearly a minute passed, and Ryan decided that nothing would happen. But when she reached for the sheet again she saw that Jamie was slowly pressing her thighs together. A dangerous-looking grin split Ryan’s face and she rested her head on her braced hand to see what would happen next.

  As she’d hoped, the pressing continued—not in a rhythmic way—but in the foggy, haphazard way that a sleeping woman moves. Ryan watched her like a vulture watches a wounded animal. Every twitching muscle was noted, every sigh, every gentle purr that left Jamie’s lips. After a long while, Jamie moved her hand and Ryan’s momentary disappointment was replaced by a bigger grin when Jamie grasped and squeezed her own breast.

  Ryan nearly leapt for her, but the dazzling sensation of watching her become aroused was too fascinating to halt prematurely. Blue eyes grew wide when Jamie began to press her ass into the mattress and gently thrust against the air. This was too much for Ryan to take. She popped a finger into her mouth and thoroughly wet it, then toyed with the crinkly hairs that guarded Jamie’s most private spot.

  On cue, Jamie’s body reacted, her legs spreading apart just enough for Ryan to touch her lips. At first contact, a low, mumbled groan left her and Ryan’s clit twitched like a live wire had been applied to it. Shivering, she kept probing, smiling when she realized that the last thing Jamie needed was extra lubrication. Her fingers were immediately generously coated with the obvious expression of Jamie’s somnolent desire, and Ryan continued to explore. Intently watching Jamie’s face, her fingers slid forward, making progress in their journey until they were poised at her opening.

  Spending just a moment debating, Ryan’s fingers slid in, and she ground her teeth together when Jamie’s hips thrust forward to meet her. Her own desire was reaching the boiling point, but she didn’t have any idea how to touch herself while keeping her fingers inside her partner. And since being enveloped by Jamie’s wet warmth was the engine driving her desire, she had no interest in withdrawing.