Out Past the Stars

by K. B. Wagers

  “Would you back him if he did?”

  I took another drink as I considered Hao’s question. “Adora doesn’t have it in her to lead a rebellion. She’s spent her whole life with everything handed to her. Without the power of the Pedalion behind her she’s not much of a threat, plus she’s locked up. But Thyra?” I shook my head, thinking again of her hypnotic voice. “Right now I’d take her head in a moment without Aiz even asking for it.”

  “Wise decision, sha zhu.”

  “I should have just killed them,” I muttered, knowing it would get a reaction from Gita. “No more gods. No more Hiervet bearing down on us.”

  “You should have, but it doesn’t do you any good to second-guess yourself now.” She surprised me with her agreement and I realized that the scene in the Pedalion chamber had shaken my BodyGuards as much as it had me. “We didn’t have an assurance that killing them would have prevented the Hiervet’s impending arrival. You did what you thought was right at the time.”

  “Besides,” Hao replied. “You’d have the entire Farian race pissed at you, which I know maybe doesn’t scare you—”

  I stuck my tongue out at him and he grinned.

  “Gita’s right. It’s too late to second-guess your choices. You’ve never been one to do that, don’t start now.”

  “Yes, sir, Captain, sir.”

  Hao’s hand twitched like he was about to smack me, but he glanced Gita’s way and sighed.

  I offered up the remainder of my whiskey as an apology and got to my feet when he took it. “I think that’s all the damage we can do today. I am going to bed to try to get some sleep before tomorrow.”

  “If it works out, Dailun and I will be heading to speak with the Svatir as soon as possible afterward.” Hao pressed a kiss to my cheek. “All joking aside, little sister, you did good today. I’m proud of you.”

  I told myself the tears were from my exhaustion, but thankfully Gita and Hao left me alone without another word.

  “Your Majesty? The Pedalion, what remains of it anyway, are here to speak with you.”

  I glanced up at Kisah as I continued picking over the remains of my breakfast the next morning. “Delphine and Yadira?”

  “Yes, ma’am, just them.”

  “Well, I did enough damage here. You can report back to Emmory that I ate my breakfast.”

  A blush appeared high on her cheeks. “We don’t report on your eating habits, ma’am.”

  “My ass you don’t. Emmory’s probably got a log.”

  “Not an official one,” he said from the doorway, a hint of a smile on his mouth. “But we do appreciate it when you make our jobs easier.”

  I grabbed the last idli and shoved it into my mouth without breaking eye contact with my Ekam. I chewed and swallowed as I stood. “Let it never be said I don’t put in the effort to make your life easier, Emmy.”

  That got a full smile out of him.

  We headed down to the cargo bay. Gita and Johar waited by the door with Zin and Hao.

  “Hail, wait.” Hao reached out and brushed a crumb of idli off my face. “Okay, now you’re presentable.”

  The moment was enough to break the heavy band around my chest, and I squeezed Hao’s hand in silent thanks and continued through the door.

  Sybil was waiting with Yadira and Delphine; all three were dressed in white, gloves covering their hands. “Star of Indrana, Your Majesty.” They bowed as a unit, but then Yadira stepped forward. “We come to ask for your protection.”

  “From whom?”

  “Us, I suspect.”

  I glanced behind me. Neither Emmory nor Gita had jolted at the sound of Aiz’s voice. He stood just inside the doorway of the cargo bay—Mia on one side of him and Fasé on the other.

  That was an interesting twist. I studied the trio for a moment. They were dressed in black, the cut of the clothing leaning more toward Indranan than Farian or Shen make, and I wondered if Stasia had had a hand in this sudden change of uniform.

  “I hope not, Aiz Cevalla.” Yadira shook her head. “My sister and I did not know of your father’s fate. That horrific secret was kept from us. We speak of the Hiervet. The Star is the only one who can see them for what they really are.”

  Not the only one, I thought, remembering Johar’s description when we’d first met the Farian Hiervet.

  “They are coming for us and they must be stopped,” Sybil said.

  “It would seem,” I said carefully, “that the more pressing matter right this second is if we are going to end up back in the middle of a war between the Farians and the Shen.” I gestured at Aiz and the trio crossed the room to us. “That is nothing I can help you with, Yadira. The choice belongs to them.”

  Fasé folded her hands at her waist. Her hands were ungloved. “My alliance with the Shen stands, sisters. If they go to war with you, so do we.”

  “We do not want war.” Delphine shook her head. “Name your price, Aiz. Tell us what it will cost to end this conflict and we will pay it.”

  “Even if I asked for the heads of your gods and the Pedalion?”

  My gut twisted at his quiet response, but I kept my face impassive. This was not my fight, not yet, and I knew that the value of silence sometimes could mean the difference between a negotiation succeeding and one ending in fire.

  “Even then,” Yadira agreed. “Our lives are a small price to pay for the peace and safety of billions.”

  “I doubt Rotem would agree.” Mia’s quiet voice carried a cutting edge, but Yadira didn’t flinch.

  “He has lost the right to make that choice. He will do as he is told. The Pedalion is broken. It was avoidable, but he and the others chose to participate in this horror. They chose to ignore the words of warning from the Eyes. So now we stand here in the Pedalion’s place. If you need lives for this peace—his and ours—they are yours.”

  Aiz was quiet for a long moment. The silence filled the room. No one moved.

  “No,” he said, shaking his head, and my heart sank until he continued. “No more deaths. It won’t bring my father back. It won’t ease the pain of all the Shen who are grieving right now for the loss of their loved ones. More death won’t change anything, Yadira. We both know this.” He took a step forward and held out his hand. “Remove your glove, take my hand, and let us lay this whole mess to rest.”

  “You will let it go? Just like that?”

  Aiz smiled, but the grief clung to his brown eyes as he glanced at Fasé. “A wise woman once said to me: The first step of anything requires little more than a willingness to take it. One person, willing to lay down their grudges and hatred. Willing to be the better person for the sake of those under their care.” He bowed his head to Yadira and Delphine. “We have been at odds, but now is the time for peace. It is no small irony that a Farian and a gunrunner both taught me that.”

  “Former gunrunner,” I murmured.

  Yadira peeled off her glove and took Aiz’s hand. “Peace starts here. It starts with us.”

  Aiz looked to the others. “Mia? Fasé?”

  Fasé joined them, clasping Yadira’s hand and then Delphine’s. Mia hung back for just a moment but finally she also stepped forward and took the Farians’ hands.

  She did not look at me and my heart ached. The tentative truce we’d had over the death of her father was apparently over.

  “Majesty?” Emmory’s hand was on my elbow.

  “I’m all right,” I lied. Mia had moved to Aiz’s side and was speaking quietly to Sybil. “Well, that went better than expected.”

  “Tell me about it.” He was looking at me and I prayed he wouldn’t press me on my lie.

  “Makes you nervous, doesn’t it?”

  “Extremely,” he replied.

  I grinned and reached around to pat his arm. “Tell everyone to stand down. I think we’re okay here for the moment.”

  “Yes, Majesty.”

  Aiz approached us, a smile peeking through his beard. “You’ve got your peace. Happy?”

  “It’s
your peace. You were supposed to talk to me first,” I replied.

  “I would have,” he said. “However, Fasé came to see us and told me what happened after we left the room yesterday. Besides, you’d already said what I needed to hear.”

  “I did?”

  “You’ve been telling me all this time,” he said. “I was just too caught up in myself to hear it.”

  “We humans call that having your head stuck up your ass.” I winked. “It happens to the best of us.”

  Aiz chuckled, but then he sobered. “Who knows what the coming days will bring, Hail. Saying we’re committing to peace may seem to be the hardest step, but the reality is there are so many pitfalls.”

  “I have faith in you.” I pressed a hand to his chest. “Besides, what would I do if you weren’t all on my side to face this bigger threat?”

  “So we make peace just to go back to war?” He laughed.

  “Apparently.”

  “You lead a strange life, Hail.”

  “I want a nap when this is all done, Aiz Cevalla. Someone else can save the galaxy next time.”

  “Let me know how that works for you.”

  15

  Aiz was true to his word and so were Yadira and Delphine, who showed no qualms about bullying, shouting, and strong-arming anyone who attempted to interfere in their new peace.

  A strange silence settled over Sicenae. Hao and Dailun left on a Farian ship and though Gita assured me their meeting with the Svatir to discuss the problem of finding the Hiervet fleet was going well, their absence made me nervous.

  “Now that there is peace, you’ll be coming home soon, Majesty?” Caterina smiled at my flat look.

  “Depends on your definition of soon. We still have a lot to do here.”

  “You have a lot to do at home, Majesty.”

  “And I would like to make sure there is a home for me to come back to. I’m not having this conversation again, Caterina.” I didn’t bother to keep the bite out of my voice.

  Caterina flinched but set her jaw and met my stubbornness with her own. “You still have no confirmation that these mysterious Hiervet exist beyond the three living on Faria. Your Majesty, it is a subject of much debate that you appear more interested in what is going on outside your empire rather than inside.”

  Alice’s muttered “Hai Ram, Caterina, a little more tact” was clear in the sudden silence, and even Caspel looked a little startled by the matriarch’s bluntness in the face of our previous argument.

  “I’m well aware of my responsibilities, Matriarch Saito, and if anyone would like to debate me personally on this issue they are more than welcome to do so. Moreover, you can tell anyone who thinks they have some say over my choices that the only way they’re getting me home before I am ready is if they come here and get me themselves.” I smiled. “If they can get through my BodyGuards and get me on a ship I’ll be very impressed.”

  Caterina stared at me for a long moment, no doubt debating if I was truly serious or if she should call me on my bluff. Finally she sighed and shook her head. “Yes, Your Majesty.”

  “Good, now do we have any other serious items on the agenda?”

  “No, that’s it for today,” Alice replied. “Take care of yourself, Hail, we’ll speak with you tomorrow.”

  “You, too.” I terminated the com with a sigh. “Was that too harsh, Emmory?” I asked, rubbing at the bridge of my nose.

  “No.”

  I dropped my hand to stare at him and he chuckled.

  “Were you expecting a different answer, Majesty?”

  “I guess I was. I know you want me to go home, but—”

  “No, I want you safe, there is a difference.” He moved away from the open door. “I understand their concerns, but as we have already discussed, Caterina and the others are not here. Their knowledge of the situation is limited and secondary to what is going on at home. Which is honestly as it should be. You have entrusted them with the running of the empire. They should allow you to take care of the situation here.”

  I couldn’t stop the laugh. “She’s not wrong about the fact that we don’t know if they still exist. We’re doing all this based off a prophecy and the fears of some paranoid aliens.”

  “What does your gut tell you, Majesty?”

  “We’re doing imperial policy off my gut now?” Emmory gave me the Look and I held up my hands in surrender. “Something’s coming, Emmy. I don’t know when and I don’t know what we’re going to do about it, but this whole thing is making me want to crawl out of my fucking skin. As dramatic as it sounds, if we leave now we risk dooming the whole galaxy.”

  “And that’s what Caterina doesn’t understand. That we are talking about the survival of not just the empire but the whole galaxy. Caspel does, but you and I know he can’t put the safety of the empire aside. You can—at least in appearance. We can focus on this problem.” He pointed at the floor between us.

  I felt my lips twitch and fought to hold in the smile. “Are you suggesting I mutiny against the council’s desire?”

  “You’ve technically already done that, Majesty. I’m suggesting that you stick it out and stop second-guessing your decisions. You know something is coming. We don’t need proof to trust you, and no one will get through us.”

  I smiled now. “I don’t know what I would do without you, Emmory, truly.”

  “Am I interrupting?”

  I looked away from him to Mia, trying to ignore the sudden jerk of my heart. “Not at all, please come in.”

  “Majesty,” Emmory murmured, and gave Mia a nod as he headed for the door.

  “I am sorry I snapped at you. You did not deserve it.”

  I held my hands out without hesitation as relief flooded through me. “I am sorry. It was a thoughtless thing to say. I forget, sometimes, that you are Shen.”

  “I am also human.” Mia crossed to me, though she stopped in front of me and dropped her hands, the tips of her fingers just brushing mine. “I should not forget that. I have been wallowing and I’m sorry for this also.”

  “For what?” I leaned back against the wall and forced the words out. All the while lying to myself that I could survive on the memory of her.

  “For being useless.”

  I felt my mouth drop open.

  “I am sorry I can’t provide you with the information you need. I should have known about what Thyra and the others did to my father. I should have looked harder and—”

  “I am starting to think that Aiz hit me a little too hard at some point and this is all one long strange dream,” I said, pushing away from the wall. “It’s the only thing that could account for you thinking that your value lies solely in your ability to see the future.”

  “I won’t fight and now I can’t see. What good am I?”

  “Mia.” I cupped her face, stunned by the pain I could feel rolling just under the surface, and I had to step down hard on the urge to take it from her. “Will you listen to me when I tell you that you are one of the smartest women I have ever met? One of the bravest and most cunning? I could spend a lifetime telling you all the ways I have watched you take care of your people and still run out of time before I ran out of words.” I leaned down and saw her gray eyes fill with tears before I pressed my lips to hers.

  “It’s not about the future or anything else. You matter to me. I know we don’t get forever, I just want you for as long as you’re willing to stay.”

  I felt her breath catch on the half sob, half laugh before she threw her arms around my neck and kissed me back.

  “It’s all right,” I murmured against her ear after we separated. “I don’t need to know the future to make the right choices.”

  “You would say that,” Mia said with a laugh. “Hail, I—”

  I’d never seen her have a vision, but I somehow knew immediately it was happening when she stiffened in my arms. Her fingers locked on my shirt, giving me just enough time to catch her before she went limp and slid to the floor.

  “Emmory!
” I was dimly aware of the sound of feet as I lowered Mia, cradling the back of her head with one hand. Images flashed in front of my eyes, of a Farian Hiervet and Adora. I saw their escape and heard my own voice issue the order to fire. I saw the chaos that followed. The accusations from the shattered Pedalion. The war with the Farians both here and in Indrana because of the murder of their gods.

  Someone pulled me away and I fought against their hold before Emmory’s voice cut through the panic.

  “Hail, talk to me.” Emmory was on a knee at my side. Aiz was opposite, cradling his sister’s face in his hands.

  “A vision. Aiz, is she all right?”

  “She’ll be fine.” Aiz helped Mia sit up.

  I reached a hand out, fingers linking with hers, and the world whited out again.

  Mia lay alone in a circle of light upon an operating table. There was blood on her face, her sightless eyes clouded over with the haze of death.

  My stomach twisted at the carnage of what looked like an autopsy and the Hiervet who stood behind the table, limbs folded behind its back.

  “Failure.” The tsking sound was entirely too human and they turned their head to look at me.

  A searing pain cut through my chest and Thyra smiled at me as she ripped her limb free. My heart beat a painful tattoo against the inside of my ribs and I coughed, blood flying into the air, spattering over her grinning face.

  There was a second pain as she impaled me again and the last thing I heard was the sharp tone of my own smati flatlining in my head.

  “Hail?”

  “I’m fine.” I reached up and patted Emmory’s shoulder awkwardly, the images and words bouncing around in my head like a wicked hangover. “Help me up.” I glanced Mia’s way but she was leaning against Aiz as she got to her feet. “I need to talk to Yadira.”

  “Majesty!” Gita skidded to a halt just inside the doorway. “Yadira and Thyra are here to see you.”

  “Give me a moment,” I murmured to Emmory when the room spun, and felt his grip on me tighten in response. “Escort them to the bridge, Gita. Have Fasé go with you.”