Mind Platter

by Najwa Zebian

  Wholeheartedness

  A risk that you take is only genuinely yours when you put your whole heart into it and go for it with your own convictions, not because of pressures from others. A true risk is one that you choose to take with hope that it will be a milestone for the fulfillment of your vision in life. If a risk ends positively, then you've made the right choice, and if it does not end as you hoped it would, that calls for a reflection on your part and an evaluation of the implications for new risks that you take. Either way, you learn a lesson only if you keep in mind that everything you do is a learning experience and never a waste of time. Time is only wasted when it is used for efforts that prove to be disappointing and we only regard that time as a waste. If we change the way we look at the disappointment, and consider it an experience that we can learn from, we add one new thing into the shape of our personalities. Sometimes that is just enough to make us realize the importance of spending time on what we neglected while we took that risk. When you focus on forgetting negative experiences instead of taking time to reflect on them and learn from them, you put yourself at the risk of inviting more negativity into your life, because negative thoughts will pile up, and every time you have a negative experience, you will recall all of the other times and reassure yourself that you have a bad life or bad luck. But when you learn to twist each negative event into a positive lesson and apply that lesson into your new experiences, you become more skillful at seeing the positives in life rather than the negatives. Instead of falling back on all of the bad things that have happened to you, you are building a good, positive bank of experiences that has, at its base, the understanding that mistake is too big and too negative of a word, while experience is bigger and more constructive to your life.

  Free

  The stars may be too far for my reach, but I am just as far from them as they are from me. It amazes me how the world seems to move in one direction sometimes. There always has to be a start and an end. You always have to be moving somewhere because, if you're not, you might lose the race. The one with the most power wins. The one in the right position wins. The one who is better at playing the game wins. It doesn't matter if you're right or wrong, or if you're trying or not. If you're not good at playing the game, you lose. Before you believe that, ask yourself if the games that you are playing are worth playing and if the races that you are running are worth running.

  We Are in This Together

  When you're going through a rough time, keep this in mind: every person on earth has problems of his or her own, young or old, wealthy or poor, healthy or sick. You may look around and see happy faces. You may look around and see that everyone else's life is perfect because they have what they want or what you wish you had. Do you realize that that's how people look at you, too? Do you realize that, to some people, you may seem like the happiest person on earth, with the most perfect life? You may be feeling like you're living in a blur. You may not care about how you interact with those around you because you're so engulfed in your own troubles. You may think that they don't even care about how you treat them because they're already happy. What difference is your smile or nice gesture going to make, right? Wrong. You may not be strong enough to draw a smile on your face when you're troubled, but others are. Their troubles may be bigger than yours, worse than yours, and more hurtful than yours. Just because they don't talk about them doesn't mean they don't exist. So, before you look at others and assume things about their lives, or judge them for doing the things that they do, think of how they could be looking at your life and thinking the same. Once you accept this fact, life becomes on your side. Happiness will seep through the broken pieces of your soul, and contentment will sew the pieces back together.

  Through Their Eyes

  See yourself through the eyes of those who love you. They see all of the goodness in you when you fail to see it. They see the best in you when you see the worst. They are always ready to lift you up even before you fall down. They see every reason why you deserve happiness, love, and joy when you may feel that you're the furthest from deserving all of that goodness. Learn to care about those who care about you before you try to make those who don't even notice you turn your way.

  The Journey

  Sometimes it's more important to figure out where you are than to decide where you're going. If you don't know where you are, how do you expect to know your destination? We often rush to our next goal, forgetting what we are leaving behind, forgetting those we are leaving behind. We forget that happiness is a journey, not a destination. We forget that tomorrow would not exist without today, and that today would not be what it is without who we are and what we have.

  The Heart’s Aches

  Could it be that you have fallen in love with the unknown? Ask me, as I have fallen way too deep. Could it be that you miss a place you've never been? Or that your fate sends a calming feeling to your heart telling it that happiness is coming its way? Could it be that your heart smiles before your eyes do? Or that you shine just like a star in someone's sky? In a different world, in a different place, oceans away yet skies too close, a heart of gold may be waiting for the perfect moment to flutter your heart with the happiness of your dreams. One day, you will understand what you haven't heard yet and hear what hasn't been said yet. One day, you will hear silence and read what hasn’t been written yet.

  Happiness Perfected

  There are moments when perfection stands in time and space, when the beauty of the moment does not need to be explained, because no words are strong enough. Those are the most beautiful moments in life. When the sunset meets the sea, when the raindrops meet the thirsty crusts of the earth, when the waves hug the shore, when the storm ends and the rainbow begins, when a baby smiles or holds your hand. When beauty meets modesty, when humbleness meets sincerity, when sadness meets empathy, when happiness meets genuineness. Those moments cannot be recreated. They cannot be equated with a price, and neither can happiness. So if you took your happiness from those moments, could you even try to put a price on it? Would you even try to get your happiness from things that are sold and bought? Would it even be possible for you to love people for what they have rather than for who they truly are?

  Let Me Be Your Weakness

  You are the weakness of those who love you. When they look at you, they see past your face. They feel greatness standing in front of them. They see happiness that they feel they don't deserve. They are willing to stand aside and see you shine rather than risk standing by your side, because they feel that they just might not give you the happiness that you deserve. Admire those who respect you even though they know how forgiving you'd be if they didn't. Those deserving of your love don't take advantage of your ability to forgive because they know how hard it is to forget. Admire those who are kind to you even though they know that you would make an excuse for them if they didn't. Those who love you don't take advantage of your innocence because they know how hard it is to maintain a white heart in a dark world. I admire those who strengthen me even though they know my weaknesses. I admire those who acknowledge my presence even when I feel invisible, because those are the ones who will understand my silence when I feel that my words are choking on disappointment. I admire those who see me as different, but I love those who see me as unique.

  Too Proud

  I may be too proud to tell you how I feel or that I need your care. I may be too proud to express how much it means to me that you are doing well and that you are happy. I admit that I am too proud to admit that I have feelings. The thing is, people only see extremes. So, I would rather seem arrogant than needy, although I am not needy. I would rather seem strong than desperate, although I am not desperate. I just want to be content, so I don't want to ask for more. I just want to be happy. If I ask you to care, your care will only be a compliment. It will not be genuine. If I ask you to respect me, your respect will seem like a burden to you. If I ask you to love me, your love will be out of pity. I will keep my pride, and you continue to be blind. But
you should know that life is always easier for the one who's loved because all he or she has to do is love back instead of fall in love with the unknown. Life is always easier for the one who is cared for because all he or she has to do is care back instead of care unconditionally. I made my decision to take a risk. Now you make yours.

  Childhood Nostalgia

  As a child, you usually make decisions without thinking of the consequences. You just think of the result that you're going to get. Before you jump, you don't think of the fall, but you think of where it'll get you. You don't care who's watching, or what they will think. Before you speak, you don't think of who's listening other than the person you're talking to. You don't know what judging means. You make spontaneous decisions, often about going for the things that will give you instant happiness and moving away from the things that cause you any kind of stress. I want to be a child again. I want to jump and fall a million times. I want to not care about what anyone thinks as long as I am happy with my decisions. I want to be a child again. My dear self, please let me be a child again.

  Questions Unanswered

  The questions that you have may be too long, too complicated, or just confusing. A mighty ship lost in the ocean may be stuck in troubled waters, calm on some days and raging on others. So are we in times of hardships and in times of uncertainty. We feel trapped when no trap can contain the amount of agony that we have. We feel our hearts caged when no cage can contain the amount of heartache that we have. Happiness and sadness swing us between the shores of anger and forgiveness. Our hearts may ache for an answer, but the truth is, the lack of an answer is sometimes better than the presence of a lie.

  Be a Treasure

  Treasures are sought because they are unique. They are different. They are timeless, despite the time that passes after they come to existence. They are not easily found because, to get to them, one must work hard. One must dig deep. One must appreciate the value at hand. You are deep. You are valuable. So let others dig you up.

  It's Time to Change

  The first obstacle to change is feeling the need to give those around you an excuse. You don't have to explain, but it’s okay if you do. Most likely, it is those around you who have made you realize that you need to change, so why would you explain? Would you explain to someone why you're watering a withering flower? Would you explain why you're feeding a hungry person? Would you explain why you're breathing? You don't need to explain why you're protecting your soul from harm. You really don’t.

  Want Me

  Don't tell me there's no place for innocent hearts in this world. Don't tell me I need to accept what I don't believe in. I respect it. Don't confuse my values for my stubbornness, although I am stubborn. Don't confuse my positive attitude for being naive. Allow me to wrap my heart around you for a moment. Listen to this. Innocent hearts may not belong anywhere in this world but they are big enough for any heart in this world. Innocent hearts belong in innocent hearts. Innocent hearts belong in the hearts of those who genuinely want happiness.

  Lead Your Heart

  Don't tell me to follow my heart. My heart is innocent. The world is not. My heart sees the best in people when that best might not exist. My heart beats to hopeless hope, flutters to dishonest promises, and sings to unwritten tunes of fake melodies. As it pumps clean blood through my veins, it takes in every impurity aimed at it from the darkness of the world and turns it into a pure thought, a pure smile, or a beautiful lesson. Don't tell me to follow my heart, for following my heart will burn me. Just as a butterfly's aching for light can burn its wings, my heart's aching for happiness might stop it from beating. I want to lead my heart to the harbor of safety. I want the reality that my mind sees, not the reality that it wants, to lead my heart. I want my heart to be just like air: felt, although it cannot be seen, and essential to the existence of another, although its love cannot be contained.

  Follow Your Soul

  No one knows what you need to do more than you do. Cry when you need to. It's relieving. Laugh when you need to. It's healing. Sit alone when you need to. It's necessary. Surround yourself with strangers when you need to. It's eye-opening. Living by your needs is not easy. No one said it was. But a fact that you should always remember is this: you are more worthy of being taken care of than anyone around you. And I don't mean the superficial kind of care. I mean the care that your soul needs. Everyone around you is struggling somehow. Everyone around you is trying to reach a goal, a destination, or a dream. Just as you might not expose your worries to the world, no one else has to. Remember that you are a work in progress. You are not perfect. You are not expected to be. Do not allow the fear of falling to stop you from jumping. Do not allow the fear of responsibility to stop you from committing. Do not allow the fear of exposure to stop you from shining.

  My Philosophy

  I cannot count the number of times I’ve been told not to be too nice to people because it will hurt me. After giving this much thought, my response is simple. When I'm too nice because I have a hidden purpose, others have the right to hurt me, because people are not made to be used but to be loved and respected. When I'm nice for the sake of actually caring about others, and living by my values, then no matter what others' responses are, they can't hurt me. I tell myself that I am being kind to the world, not specific people. Be content with yourself and always smile. If the world smiles back, that's great. If it doesn't, then that's great too, because despite the harshness around you, you are still able to stick to your beliefs, values, and character with a genuine smile.

  Break Free from the Illusion of Power

  The realities that we are forced to accept in life are sometimes very challenging. Most people will tell you that you need to accept the good and the bad and just be quiet, as long as you're not harmed, as long as accepting and being silent keeps you in your place or moves you forward instead of taking away from what you already have. It is sad but true. We are faced with people daily who tell us that patience is suffering in silence. We are faced with people daily who tell us that following is better than leading and that obeying orders is better than questioning those orders. They disregard the fact that questioning someone's orders or opinions is not a disrespectful act towards those individuals. My philosophy in life and my beliefs request of me to respect myself before I respect anyone else, because if respecting someone else jeopardizes my own respect, then that respect is superficial, invalid, and insincere. My beliefs force me to question everything that comes my way, regardless of where it comes from.

  Hollow Hopes

  We often build hopes and dreams on assumptions created by our own minds. We design these hopes and dreams exactly the way we desire them to be. They become part of us, part of our own identity, because we authentically created them. An assumption based on something that we aspire to spurs an idea or question in the mind, and after that, every event that happens serves to either confirm or disprove that assumption. Most times, events will confirm our assumptions, not because they are clear, but because they don't blatantly disprove them. Our default belief is that our assumption was real. Although this defies logic, realistically, it is a logical sequence of steps that our minds go through. Our minds draw illusions of things we love to see, and our ears hear what we would love to hear. We love the feeling of instant gratification that we get from proving our thoughts. The truth is, a million proofs of confirmation, and a million proofs of disproof, are easier than one maybe. Maybe yes. Maybe no. That is why we like our questions to be answered, no matter what the answer is. And, it is easier for our minds and hearts to answer with a yes than with a no because our natural instinct will push us to avoid the disappointment of a no.

  Common Sense?

  We often forget that common sense isn't always good sense. We conform to what those around us expect, what they consider to be right or wrong, what they consider to be a duty or a privilege, what they consider to be better or worse. We accept the way that people are ranked, as if people were made to be put in som
e kind of order based on a set of predetermined criteria. Beauty. Money. Power. Status. Appealing, aren't they? We automatically make ourselves followers of and believers in such ranks. We even place ourselves as better than some people and worse than others. Why? Because we are living proof that this way of thinking works. So what do we do? We make a choice to either make our minds follow or lead. Most of us stay in the middle. We recognize what is morally wrong, but we wait for someone brave, someone not afraid to speak up and verbalize what is wrong, and we follow that person. Instead of following the lead of our minds, we follow the lead of people. We forget that a true leader is one who aspires to make those around him think critically and perceive the world with an open mind. To honor a true leader, you don't follow them; you show them that their philosophies and actions encouraged you to free your mind to think. When a leader that we blindly follow makes a mistake, we love being able to blame them for leading us to a dead end. We make ourselves slaves to others' beliefs, make our eyes blind, cuff our hands, and nullify our ability to think, judge, silence our hearts, and follow. Then, we blame others for ending up with us at the wrong place. It doesn't make sense. Does it?