by Cassie Mae
“Ugh!” I growl, throwing myself in the thicket of V-necks and capris. I’m so totally hopeless. Mom helped me with this stuff before. I’d model outfits, she’d do my hair, tone down my makeup… I looked killer on my dates, even if they were few and far between.
Something trickles down the side of my cheek, and I use one of my skirts to wipe it away. I need a friend. And I know I’m loud and nosey and a bit bossy, and she already has a best friend that in no way can be replaced, but I reach over to my phone resting on a pair of jeans and flick to Lexie’s number.
After three rings a guy answers. “Hello?”
“Um… Lexie?” I joke, but it comes out croaky because I’m still crying into my t-shirts.
“Hey, Kaylee. She’s trying to put her mom to bed right now. You want me to have her call you back?”
I raise my head to look at the clock. It’s only 7:30, but I’ve heard the rumors about Lexie’s mom going around school so I don’t ask about it.
“She doesn’t have to call,” I say, scooting from the bed. “I’m just going to send a bunch of pictures and if at least one of you will help me decide what to wear then that’ll save my night.”
He chuckles. “It’s for Nate, right? You know he’ll probably be fine with what you have on.”
I look down at myself. “I’m naked.”
It’s quiet for a full three seconds before he chokes out, “Then he’ll definitely be okay with it.”
“Ryan!”
Something scuffles on his side of the phone, and I hear him lightly explaining my situation to Lexie.
“Hey, she says to send her the pics,” he says when he gets back on.
“Thank you!”
I hang up and lay out a bunch of tops and bottoms across my floor. Then snap, snap, snap and wait to hear Lexie’s thoughts.
Lexie: Third top with fourth bottom. *cute!*
Me: How should I do my hair?
Lexie: Braids. Nate talks about them a lot.
Me: For real????
Lexie: Yes. And your lip-gloss. (According to Ry…)
Me: Thanks, Bestie! You guys are awesome!
Lexie: np. And you don’t have to call me that you know…
Me: Yes I do.
I set my phone down and pull on the suggested outfit, then take a selfie with a blown kiss. After I send it to her, I skip to the bathroom and do my hair and makeup, feeling ten times better than I did twenty minutes ago.
***
Nate rings the doorbell at 7:49. I trip my way down the stairs and swing it open full force, too excited to see him to care that I totally forget to put on mascara.
“Sorry, I’m a little earl—”
I barrel into his lips, not even sorry about it. He’s wearing the fedora and the suspenders. How can he not expect me to pounce?
“Hey, um… your dad…” he mumbles around my mouth. I smile and drop from my tiptoes.
“Is working very late tonight.”
The cutest blush washes his cheeks. “Oh. Yeah. Cool.”
I laugh. “You want to meet Mr. Pippi?”
“If his schedule has opened up.”
Now that my room is clean, his calendar is too. I knock the front door shut with my hip, then drag him by his forefinger up the stairs.
I take an obvious sniff of my room before opening the door all the way. Smells good, thank heavens. And Nate’s nose doesn’t crinkle when he steps in, so high-five for me on the speed-cleaning thing.
His eyes drift over the posters on my walls, an amused grin on his face when he sees the giant one of Tyler Hoechlin with his shirt open and water drizzling down his sweet, precious abs. Then an even more amused grin when he notices my entire wardrobe still strewn over my bed since I didn’t have time to put it away. I shrug when he gestures to it, and then head to Mr. Pippi’s cage.
“Okay, you gotta be nice to him,” I say, coaxing the white fur-ball into my hands.
“I will,” Nate says, and I smile over my shoulder.
“I was actually talking to Mr. Pippi. He’s a bit of a butthole.”
Nate takes a step toward me, and our hands touch when I slide my gerbil to his palm. Mr. Pippi shakes a little, but after Nate strokes his fur a few times he calms down.
“How long have you had him again?” he asks, bringing Mr. Pippi closer to his face. I feel like kissing his smile lines.
“Couple years.” I pat Mr. Pippi’s head, totally letting my pinky tumble over Nate’s knuckles. “My dad bought him for me when my parents got divorced. He’s good company even though he sleeps most of the time.”
Nate brings Mr. Pippi down and gives me a half-grin. “Are you close with your mom?”
“Sort of. We talk on the phone sometimes, but she seems pretty busy. Really… I’m not close with anyone.”
His brows pull in. “Don’t you have a shit ton of friends? I’ve watched you for a while, and you’re friends with everybody.”
I bolt out a laugh, scaring Mr. Pippi so much he tries to crawl up to Nate’s fedora. “I’m not close to anybody.” My smile somewhat falters. It’s not for lack of trying. I want close friends. I suppose my personality hasn’t meshed. But I’m starting to trust Lexie more. Ryan even.
And Nate. Definitely, definitely Nate.
I shuffle closer just because I’m glad he’s here. “I guess there’s a difference between being friendly and having friends.”
He gives me a confused look for a second, but then his eyes pop wide and his bottom lip drops. He looks down at my gerbil with pure disgust.
“He peed on me!”
Nate sticks his arms out, and I laugh as I collect Mr. Pippi and put him back in his cage.
“Aww, you are now officially a member of our club.”
Nate cringes, holding his hand out. I grab one of his belt loops and tug him to the bathroom—which is tiny. We squish in there, bodies practically touching from knee to shoulder, and for some dumb reason I think he needs help washing up. I turn the faucet on and squirt the soap on his hands and force him to scrub. He’s laughing at me, and when I catch his eye, he shakes one of his hands off, reaches up to his fedora, and places it over my blond braids.
“I want you to be my friend,” he says, then rinses his hands. My heart’s beating a million miles a minute when I hand him the towel. My fingers won’t let go though, and soon, I’m just holding his hand.
“Good. Because I was going to force you into it anyway,” I joke, but it comes out low and sort of whispered. I’m having trouble breathing right.
His hand turns in mine, slick and warm and still a little soapy, but I don’t think either of us care. My eyes meet his, and suddenly his wet hand is on my neck.
It happens so fast I’m not sure if I kiss him or he kisses me first. Doesn’t matter because I don’t have long to think about it. Pretty sure I’m not thinking at all anymore. Nate grips the back of my thighs, and I wasn’t sure if he’d have the strength to lift me, but lift me he does, swinging my legs around his hips and moving me toward my bed.
Oh gosh, my bed. It’s still layered with almost every bit of clothing I own. But we slam down on it anyway, and his lips pattern over my chin, down my neck, and a low rasp bellows from my vocal chords, and I wonder if there’s something wrong with my hearing because no way did that come from me.
“Nate,” I gasp, latching onto his suspenders and ripping them from his shoulders. His mouth moves back to mine, tongue not tentative any longer as he slides it between my lips. He tastes like sour patch kids, and soda, and warmth, and goose bumps. I can’t get a grip on my breathing. My hands have a mind of their own as they grip, pull, tug, pinch, and whatever else as I try to get closer and closer to him. We’re a tangle of limbs and body parts, pushing against each other and into my mess of a bed.
I cannot get enough. Every time he breaks away, I pull him back. Every time I tilt my head back to breathe, he keeps his lips on me somewhere. His whole body is in contact with mine, yet I still don’t feel close enough. No wonder people shed
their clothes so fast in situations like this. There’s a fire and hunger so deep it’s like you have to crawl into the other person to satiate it.
My fingers dive for his shirt, rip it from his pants so it dangles between us. It tickles the bare skin by my belly button where my top has risen, making me giggle. Nate smiles against my lips, a hand running over my stomach igniting my already heated body. He leans back enough so I can see his eyes, and I’m biting back a major grin, blush filling my cheeks.
A small breath leaves his mouth. “Can I say something?”
I nod, shifting a little underneath him so his thigh is tighter between my legs.
He quirks a grin, but then falls flat into the crook of my neck before mumbling, “You’re so damn beautiful.” A kiss presses to my shoulder when a giggle passes through my lips. “I’m like, in shock that you are into someone like me.”
I wiggle so he looks up. When he does I playfully bite at his chin. “Thank you. But you know I feel the same way, right?” My hand slithers down to his back pocket, and I laugh at his flamed ears as I squeeze his toosh. “I’ve been checking you out since we were freshmen.”
“Why?”
“Do you even have to ask?” I laugh as a string of colorful handkerchiefs falls into my hand when I pull it from his pocket.
He groans, taking the handkerchiefs and covering his blushed face with them. It’s so effing adorable I can’t help but push him to his back, straddle his hips, and go at his mouth.
He’s hard. I figured he was, but when he was the one on top I couldn’t feel it. There’s no hiding it now, and my belly twirls and whirls because oh my, are we going all the way? Something beats between my legs, and I’m wondering where it came from or what it means because it’s both uncomfortable and pleasurable. So out of curiosity I rub against him, sending bolts and shocks and butterflies and shivers all the way up to the crown of my head.
“Kaylee?” he croaks around my mouth.
“Mmm?” I part from his lips, but bury myself in his neck because for one, I don’t want to stop making out, and two, I don’t want him to see my face.
“Did you hear something?”
I laugh, and the movement makes our bodies rub again.
“If you want me to ease up, just say so,” I say. “Don’t make up some noise—”
“Kaylee bug?” my dad’s voice floats up the stairs. Both Nate and I scramble to put eight thousand feet between us, but our legs are tangled in a heap of clothes and bed sheets. Dad’s voice is at the door now. “Do you have a lint roller or something? Mr. Banks has a cat and there’s fur all over my sui—”
His eyes lift, swivel between me and my boyfriend as Nate falls to the floor and I barely have enough time to adjust my shirt so I’m not flashing my dad.
“Um, I don’t have one, sorry,” I say, trying to act normal, but there is no way he didn’t see what was happening. Nate gets to his feet, holding his fedora expertly over his crotch.
Dad adjusts his suit jacket he has over his arm and mutters through clenched teeth, “I think it’s time for Nate to go.”
“Yes, sir. Sorry, sir,” Nate scrambles around my bed, looks like he wants to give me a kiss goodbye but thinks better of it, and flinches as he passes my dad. I wait till I hear the front door shut before I make a move. Sliding to the edge of the bed, I close my eyes and prepare myself for whatever humiliating conversation is about to take place.
Dad clears his throat, and I pop open one eye to see him scratching the greying hair on the side of his head. “I’m going to bed.”
My other eye pops open. “Huh?”
He steps backward into the hall, brows pulled down to the center of his forehead. “No boys in the house when I’m not here.”
And with that he swivels on his heel and heads to his room. I tiptoe across my carpet and watch him disappear behind his door. I tap on the doorframe with my now-chipped nails and bite my lip. Guess he doesn’t know how to handle these kinds of things without Mom either.
Chapter 12
I step out of the ice cold shower, wrap a towel around my waist, and head to my bedroom. Just being near Kaylee sets my body ablaze, so when she started grinding into me, I thought for sure my body heat would set off the smoke detectors. I’d prefer the blaring alarm over her father standing in the doorway with a look of utter shock on his face. I swear his biceps grew three sizes from the last time I saw him. I wonder how much he can bench press? Probably two of me. Better yet, I don’t want to know.
I go to put my pants in the hamper, but first take my notebook out of the pocket and put it on my night stand so I remember to grab it in the morning. I pull a pair of boxers out of my dresser, step into them, and pick up my phone to send Kaylee a quick text.
Me: Just when I thought he was starting to like me :( Hope you’re not grounded.
Kaylee: Turn that frown upside-down mister! He didn’t even say anything.
Me: Really? Nothing?
Kaylee: Only you can’t come over when he’s not here.
Me: Bummer
Kaylee: He didn’t say I couldn’t go to your place *wink, wink*
Me: What are you doing tomorrow?
Kaylee: Wednesdays Mr. Pippi and I usually watch Project Runway
Me: What if you watch it with me?
Kaylee: I don’t know…Mr. Pippi is the jealous type.
Me: He did pee on me. I think he owes me one.
Kaylee: You were peed on by royalty. That’s like being knighted
Water spews out of my mouth and onto my phone. Note to self: It is not safe to drink water when talking to Kaylee.
Me: You’re adorable.
Kaylee: *blushes*
A smile spreads across my face, and I recline onto my bed. I close my eyes and think of Kaylee’s body pressed against mine. The softness of her skin. The taste of strawberry on her lips and the way her braids grazed my cheek when she dipped her head to kiss my neck.
It hasn’t even been two hours since I left her house, yet I feel like it’s been days. An overwhelming feeling that something is missing takes over my mind, but when I look at my phone, Kaylee’s face smiling back at me from her icon, it dissipates.
Kaylee: Are you there?
Me: Sorry. Lost in thought.
Kaylee: What are you thinking about?
Me: You. And as crazy as it may sound… I already miss you.
Kaylee: Not crazy at all. I miss you too.
Just when I didn’t think my smile could get any wider, it tugs so hard I swear my lips are going to wrap around my head. This girl is so out of my league, and she doesn’t even know it. But she has to. No matter how you slice it, there’s no denying what I am. I’m a nerd who spends his days practicing magic tricks. So far from any girl’s ideal guy. Which is why my brother always gets the girl, and I never do. But maybe all of that stuff doesn’t matter to Kaylee because when it comes to true love, there’s no rhyme or reason. No explanation. Just a feeling and a desire to be as close as you possibly can to a person. I know I feel it. And even though she’s only been my girlfriend for a short time, I’ve been in love with her since the day I spotted her braids in the hallway.
Knowing that there’s a chance she feels exactly what I’m feeling…well hell, it’s pretty darn awesome.
Me: I don’t want to say goodnight.
Kaylee: Then don’t. Lay down, close your eyes, and I’ll do the same. We’ll fall asleep together and neither of us has to say goodnight or goodbye.
I crawl into bed, throw the comforter off—too damn hot—and pull my sheet around my waist.
Me: Closing my eyes.
I tuck my arm under my pillow, and rest my phone next to me on the mattress.
Kaylee: Me too.
I close my eyes, Kaylee’s beautiful face coming to life in my mind, and drift off into sleep.
***
“Are you ready?” Kaylee asks from just outside my bedroom.
I’d been ready from the minute she walked in the house and told me she found
the perfect costume for the magic show. I tried ripping the bag out of her hand and getting a glimpse, but she kept a tight hold on it, wanting to give me the full effect.
She disappeared into the bathroom, and I’ve been pacing my room ever since.
“Yes!” I say with a little too much enthusiasm.
Kaylee’s bare leg kicks out in front of the door. Her hands grab her ankle and run up the length of her calf over her knee and up her thigh.
I’m loving the show, but if she doesn’t get in this room like now, my body is going to spontaneously combust.
Her leg comes down and the rest of her appears in the doorway.
And… um…Wow.
“So what do you think?” she asks, but I can’t gather my thoughts to form a response.
I nod over and over again like an out of control bobble head.
“Is that a good thing?” she asks, wrapping her arms around the red sequins of her shirt and gripping the waistband of her black mini—very mini—skirt.
Still unable to get my brain to communicate with my mouth, I step closer to her. I reach out taking her hands in mine. She has no reason to hide. No reason to be embarrassed. She looks amazing. Beautiful and perfect.
Her big green eyes glance up at me. Unable to speak, needing to show her everything that’s going on in my mind, I wrap my hand around her neck and press my mouth to hers. The littlest of whimpers rises from her throat. She thrusts her fingers into my hair and pins me up against the wall.
Everything about Kaylee is sweet, but nothing about this kiss is sweet. It’s intense and desperate and so unbelievably hot. I pull back slightly and rest my head on her forehead. “You’re going to be very distracting.”
“Good,” she breathes against my lips then presses her mouth to mine.
Kaylee’s hand slides under my shirt and across my stomach. Her nails trace the band of my pants. I still can’t believe this amazing girl is here with me. And not just here with me, but with me. My girlfriend. Damn. How’d I get so lucky?
