First Comes Love

by Juliana Conners

  She walks right in and flops down in the chair on the other side of my desk. I can’t help thinking of how I tied up Ruby to that very chair. I wish she was here sitting in it right now instead of Katie.

  “So, where’s Ruby?” she asks me.

  “I can’t discuss the status of a former employee,” I say automatically.

  I’ve been trained well by HR. Some HR reps just had a little sit-down with Asher and Madilyn about accusations regarding their relationship. It turns out that everything is fine because they are both okay with the relationship.

  Still, I can’t be too careful. I doubt that Ruby is okay with the state of our relationship, or lack thereof, right now. And neither, for that matter, am I.

  “A former employee?” Katie asks. “Wow. She finally figured out she was too good for this place and left, huh? I wish she would have at least stopped on her way out to say goodbye to poor little old me.”

  “I’m sure she would have, had she had the opportunity,” I say, too fucking quickly.

  My statement is probably not HR approved. But it’s just the first thing I could think of to say, and it’s honest.

  “What?” Katie demands. “Was she fired? That’s bullshit.”

  “Katie.”

  I would tell her to watch her language but then I’d be the biggest fucking hypocrite of all time.

  “Well it is,” she says, slouching further into my chair and pouting.

  “I didn’t know you and Ruby were friends,” I tell her, wondering why any of this matters so much to her.

  “Yeah, well, I know a lot more about you and Ruby than you’d think I do,” she says. “And I can’t believe you had the balls to fire her. That’s just straight up asking for a sexual harassment suit.”

  I stare at her, incredulous that she’d say such a thing.

  And then it dawns on me.

  At first I thought she was just here wanting office gossip. Now I find out how close she and Ruby apparently were. And I put two and two together. I don’t know how I didn’t figure it out earlier, with the stench wafting from Katie’s clothes as soon as she walked into my office.

  Ruby can be redeemed. But I need a confession.

  “You know, Katie,” I tell her, pretending to shuffle some paperwork on my desk as if I need to get back to work. “There are certain things that employees can be fired for that have absolutely nothing to do with sexual harassment.”

  “Oh yeah?” she asks, shrugging. “Like what? Because I’ve done a lot of things that are supposed to be considered ‘no-no’s and I’ve never been fired. I know a lot of people here that are the same way. No one seems to notice or care. So, like, what could be a fireable offense around here? I’d love to know.”

  “If an employee is doing drugs, for instance,” I tell her. “Especially on the job.”

  “What the hell?”

  Katie looks at me like she doesn’t even know what I’m talking about.

  “Ruby doesn’t even do any drugs,” Katie says, defensively. “Or at least she doesn’t anymore. She hasn’t even heard of ‘Puncture.’”

  “Of what?” I ask her, shaking my head.

  “The movie. ‘Puncture.’ With the lawyers who are cokeheads?”

  I just stare at her blankly, so now she’s the one to share her head. Then she continues.

  “Why has no one heard of this movie around here? Anyway. Ruby doesn’t even have time to watch movies because she’s so busy coding.”

  I look at her. Wow. They really were friends.

  I’m glad, because that means Katie won’t let Ruby take the fall for her.

  “Well, I’m just saying. An employee doing drugs, especially at work, would be a fireable offense for sure. And if they leave their drug paraphernalia lying around, at the office, that’s an especially clear cut case. There’s really no choice for us to do anything but fire them, in that instance.”

  “Leave drug paraphernalia… oh.”

  She looks at me, comprehending now. I expect her to act shady or perhaps break down in a tearful confession.

  But instead she starts bursting out laughing.

  That’s definitely not the reaction I was anticipating.

  “Oh, Mr. Sanchez,” she says, laughing so much there are tears rolling down her eyes. “You’re talking about weed. The way you made it sound… so serious… I thought you were talking about, like crack or something. ‘Drug paraphernalia.’ Oh my God. So, funny.”

  She’s still laughing. But I’m not. I don’t see how she thinks any of this is very funny. But more importantly, she still hasn’t confessed that the vape pen was hers.

  “Well, Katie, you shouldn’t be laughing because it’s a very serious matter.”

  “Oh, I know, Mr. Sanchez, I know,” she says, straightening up in her chair. “But you have to admit, you made it sound a bit more serious and scary than it really is. A vape pen is ‘drug paraphernalia?’ Really?”

  Ah-fucking-ha. Got her.

  Now I can save Ruby’s ass. And hopefully claim it as my own.

  Chapter 23 – Cameron

  “How do you know it was a vape pen?” I ask Katie.

  “Oh, all right, it was mine and you seem to know that,” she says, cutting through the bullshit.

  I admire that about her. It’s another Ruby-like trait.

  “And I shouldn’t have left it there,” she admits. “I must have gotten a bit too… medicated… and forgotten.”

  “Medicated?”

  “Yeah. I have a weed card.”

  “A weed card?”

  “Mr. Sanchez,” she sighs, as if explaining something to a kindergartner. “I have a medical marijuana card. For health conditions.”

  “For what health conditions?”

  This is a new one. I wasn’t expecting this.

  “Actually, Mr. Sanchez, I don’t have to tell you. But since you’re so curious, anxiety and ADHD. I’ve consulted with a weed attorney who tells me it’s really no different than if I’m on Prozac for depression or Xanax for anxiety, or a host of other prescriptions for a bunch of other conditions.”

  I just look at her, stunned. She sounds like more of a lawyer than some of the actual lawyers I employ.

  “And honestly,” she continues, “Would you rather me be unable to focus or calm down all day while I’m here at work? Or have to quit or get fired because I can’t function well enough to do my job based on my disability? My attorney says that when viewed that way, most employers would rather their employees medicate than the alternatives…”

  “You’ve consulted with a… okay, never mind,” I tell her. “I didn’t mean to ask about your medical conditions or medications. That’s private, of course.”

  Oh shit.

  I’ve probably violated HIPAA.

  Then I realize I have no idea how any of this will be viewed. HIPAA is a Federal law and medicinal marijuana is still illegal federally.

  Still. It’s not a battle I want to fight in court. Especially not with super liberal judges like Baez taking over the bench these days.

  “Katie, I’m sorry,” I tell her. “I didn’t mean to imply…”

  “It’s fine,” she says. “I won’t sue you. Just don’t fire me.”

  “You really can’t be hitting your vape pen in the filing room though.”

  As soon as I say it I realize what a fucking hypocrite I am. I’m expecting her to say that she’s heard I hit more than that in there. But if she’s heard about that little rendezvous, she doesn’t say anything.

  Instead, she says, “Vaping.”

  “What?”

  “I can’t be vaping in the filing room. There’s no need to say ‘hitting my vape pen,’ Mr. Sanchez. It’s redundant. You can just say ‘vaping.’”

  “Okay. Got it,” I tell her.

  If this is what Jim has to put up with when Katie proofreads his documents, I feel bad for the guy.

  “You can’t be vaping in the filing room, Katie. Is there any place you can… medicate… in your own
space? On your own time? Like the other legal assistants do when they go outside and take smoke breaks?”

  She smiles.

  “Sure, Mr. Sanchez. I’ll figure it out. Just don’t fire me. And get Ruby back. And I won’t sue you.”

  “I would love to get Ruby back,” I tell her. In every fucking sense of the word. “But I don’t even know where she is.”

  “You can’t find her?” she asks. “You lost Ruby?”

  “I’ve tried to find her but I guess she doesn’t want to talk to me anymore.”

  “That can’t be true. Ruby was a little into you. A little too into you. I had to talk her out of being that into you. It’s not good for a sweet girl like that to get caught up with a player like you.”

  I stare at her.

  Player?

  So, that’s what they think about me around here.

  Well, I guess it’s fucking true. At least it was true. Before I met Ruby. And she rocked my fucking world and turned it all the way upside down.

  Just like I’ve been turning her upside down on my desk and in the filing room. Just like I want to keep turning her upside down, if she’ll let me.

  “Oh, I know you think she’s edgy and alternative and stuff like that,” Katie continues. “And she alludes to some kind of bad ass past. But underneath she’s a good girl. Very sweet and innocent. You can’t go breaking her heart.”

  “That’s not at all what I intend to do,” I tell her. “I just don’t know where she is. If I could find out, I would definitely go get her.”

  “Mr. Sanchez, I know you didn’t become one of the founding partners of one of the best law firms in the country by not using your noggin,” she says.

  The nerve of this girl. Lecturing me like she’s twice my age instead of the other way around. But she does have a point.

  “Put on your thinking cap and go find Ruby, Mr. Sanchez.”

  “I will, Katie. You have a good day. Remember to vape in your own time.”

  “I’ll vape in my own time,” she agrees, getting up to leave. “And you go find Ruby and get her back.”

  I plan to, Katie. And I plan to have her on her back as soon as I find her.

  Chapter 24 – Cameron

  No sooner had Katie left my office than Asher and Madilyn are entering. Fuck. It’s like a revolving door in here. I really don’t want to deal with them right now.

  Asher is convinced that Ruby did something illegal to get the information about Damien, the toy company client. But he was also convinced that the vape pen belonged to her as well.

  “Hey guys,” I tell them, as they approach my desk.

  I think about telling them that I’ve found out it wasn’t Ruby’s vape pen. But I don’t want to get Katie into trouble.

  I need to think about the best way to approach it. Maybe a partners’ meeting where we look into the intricacies of medical marijuana in the workplace.

  That’s the last of my problems right now anyway. First on my agenda is using my noggin to find out where Ruby might be.

  “Hi Ron,” Asher says.

  He seems to be in a jovial mood. I look over at Madilyn and she’s smiling.

  “What’s up?” I ask.

  “I came to ask my best man to stand up beside me at our wedding,” Asher says.

  “Really?”

  I look back and forth between him and Madilyn. They’re both nodding enthusiastically.

  “Of course,” I say, but I’m still a bit shocked.

  I knew they were really into each other but I didn’t know things had gotten this serious.

  “It won’t be for a while and we’re keeping it on the down low but I wanted you to be one of the first to know,” Asher says.

  “That’s great. Congratulations.”

  I’m truly smiling now, happy for them despite my surprise. I wish that Ruby and I could turn out to have a similar fate. But I don’t even know where she is.

  As if reading my mind, Asher says, “Now don’t go thinking this means we made the wrong decision in firing Ruby. That was nothing like this.”

  “Asher told me about that,” Madilyn says, shaking her head and looking sad. “I think it’s a shame. I think she was a nice girl and that you two had a good thing going on. Much like Asher and me.”

  “Well, honey, you never smoked an electronic weed cigarette in the office,” Asher jokes.

  “Yeah, but I’ve done a lot of other naughty things in the office,” she says back, winking at him.

  “Vaping,” I say, mostly just to get them to stop flirting with each other right in front me. I love them and all, but it’s fucking obnoxious. Especially when I’m not able to do it myself with Ruby.

  “What?” Asher asks.

  “It’s called vaping. You don’t have to say ‘smoke an electronic weed cigarette’ because you can just say vaping.”

  “Wow, looks like Ruby taught you a thing or two,” Madilyn laughs.

  “You know, I was wanting to talk to you about,” I say. “I don’t think Ruby did it. I don’t think it was her vape pen.”

  “Sure,” Asher says. “Whatever you want to believe. But I wouldn’t bet on believing her. The toy company people think she’s not even who they say she is.”

  “What?”

  “Honey,” Madilyn says, pulling on the sleeve of Asher’s suit jacket. “You don’t need to go into all of this right now. Let Cameron make his own decisions.”

  “He deserves to know,” Asher says. “Especially since she’s not exactly sticking around to explain herself.”

  “Explain herself about what?” I explode, instantly defensive. “You fired her. How could she stick around? And what do you mean she’s not who she says she is?”

  “They did some digging— they have their own computer people too, you know— about who would be hacking into their system and why, and they can’t even find a record of her existence. They say most of the things on her resume are fake.”

  “You showed them her resume?” I ask Asher.

  “They were worried about their privacy and security,” Asher says. “They wanted to find out who might know their secrets. But the good news is, they did find an email she drafted that explains a lot about her past. They asked me if I wanted to know but I figured it doesn’t matter to me. She’s no longer an employee. But if you want to read it, I’m sure they’ll let you. In fact, it seems to have been written to you.”

  “Back up,” I tell him.

  Yes, I’m interested in the fact that she wrote me an email. But I figure that if she wanted to see the email then she would have sent it to me. There are other things that Asher said that I find disturbing.

  “What about her privacy and security?” I ask. “They read her resume that she submitted to us and us alone? And her private email? What the fuck, Asher?”

  He just shrugs, as if all if fair in love and Internet hacking wars. And maybe it is, for all I know. I really don’t know much about it. I’m learning a lot about a lot of different things, thanks to Ruby.

  “And why are you even talking to them about all of this?” I demand.

  “Because thanks to your little illicit lover, they’re thinking about not hiring us,” he sneers.

  “Honey,” Madilyn hisses, at his hypocritical use of the phrase “illicit lover.”

  But that’s not even the part I’m most upset about.

  “Well you should love that, since you never thought we should represent them in the first place,” I tell Asher.

  “Well, now that I know…” he begins.

  “Now that you know how much money they have, you want to represent them after fighting me tooth and nail about it before. And you know how you know how much money they have? Ruby.”

  “You do have a point,” he says, smiling that cocky grin of his that right now I almost wish I could wipe off of his face.

  Asher and I have always had a relationship like brothers. Some days I love him, some days I want to knock him out. Lately there have been a lot more of the latter.
>
  I hate to admit it but Ruby gave me the strength to let him know not to mess with me. I appreciate his help throughout the years but this is my firm too. I can’t believe I let him fire her. I have to get her back.

  “Madrid,” I say suddenly, standing up and grabbing my briefcase.

  “What?” asks Asher.

  “I think I know where Ruby is.”

  I remember how she said she had a picture of the café in Madrid in the Rubik’s Cube feature of her app. How she was saving up money to go there.

  “Are you sure that going after her is really a good idea?” Asher asks.

  “Oh, Asher,” Madilyn says, elbowing him playfully. “Do you already forget what it feels like to fall in love? Because we just did it.”

  Looking at me, she says, “I’m sorry my fiancé is being so difficult. I think that love is worth going after. Even if you’re afraid of the risk.”

  “Thank you, Madilyn.”

  If I’m being completely honest, I’d have to admit that I don’t think it’s the best fucking idea I’ve ever had. Ruby apparently has some dark secrets that could ruin me.

  Tying her up again could take me down.

  But it’s all I want to do.

  Chapter 25 – Ruby

  Madrid is everything I always thought it would be and more. It’s gorgeous, vibrant and fun. Except that Cameron isn’t here. And try as I might— which I’ve been doing, very, very hard— I can’t get him out of my mind.

  I came here to try to forget him. Since he no longer wanted me at his firm— or as his “office whore”— and since I sold my app and have money to travel, I figured there was no better time than to come to the place I’ve always wanted to come.

  But now all I can think about is how much I want him. I just want him to touch me one more time. To look at me. To talk to me. To kiss me. To fuck me.

  It’s been two weeks since I’ve seen him. And I’ve been here for a week. Right now, I’m at an Internet café but I’m supposed to go to a discoteca with some friends I met at an international coding meetup when I first got here. I don’t really feel like going, though.