“Nope, we’re not on shift this morning. We’re only on later this afternoon.” I followed him in when he stepped aside, the distinct smell of rum and tequila practically seeping out of his pores when I passed him. “We do have an errand to run, though. You’re coming to the market with me.”
“Sure, let’s go.” He stopped mid-stride, turning to move back to the door. “Wait, why are we going to the market?”
“Before I tell you that, you better go get some clothes on. Were you seriously just about to leave the house in your underwear?”
“Shit.” He scratched his head again, another deep groan falling from his lips. “Thanks for reminding me. I got a little drunk last night and I’m not sure I’m totally sober right now.”
“I figured as much. Where did you go?” I smirked at my friend. “Wait, let me guess. Karaoke?”
He formed a gun with his fingers and mimed pulling the trigger. “Don’t you know it. Man, it was awesome. You should have been there. I fucking love ladies’ night.”
“You do know you’re not a lady, right?” I raised an eyebrow. “Unless there’s something you haven’t told me.”
He punched me in the shoulder, but his aim was off, and he ended up only clipping the very end. “You wish there’s something I haven’t told you. If there was and I was a chick, you could just date me and all your problems would disappear.”
I snorted. “I don’t have problems. I’m not dating anyone, remember?”
He rolled his eyes, motioning for me to give him a minute. It took about five, but when he came back, he was fully dressed and had even brushed his teeth judging from the minty smell now mixed in with the alcohol vapors.
“Okay.” He clapped his hands together. “Remind me why you’re dragging me to the market when I’m half-drunk and already beginning to feel a hangover of epic proportions coming on?”
“We’re going to get a gift for Elyse,” I said. “She saw some jewelry there that she really liked the last time we were there and we’re going back to get it for her.”
“If you already know what you’re going to get for her, why do you need me?” he asked, putting his hand up to shield his eyes as he opened the door. “And why is it so goddamn bright outside?”
I pulled my sunglasses off the top of my head. “Here. You need these more than I do.”
He took them gratefully, sighing with relief when he slid them over his eyes. “You’re a lifesaver. I can’t believe I lost that new pair already. I suck with keeping track of my sunglasses.”
“That you do,” I agreed. Mauli was notorious for losing his own glasses, which was why I’d just loaned him mine for the day. “As for your other question, I need you with me to make sure I don’t do anything stupid.”
“Like what?” He frowned. “It’s a market on a Thursday morning. There aren’t so many stupid things one can get up to there.”
“Oh, but there is.” I sighed as we climbed into the Jeep. “As much as it pains me to admit, I need you to help keep me in line. There was one particular pendant she admired more than the rest, but she fawned over so many of the pieces. I’m afraid if I go alone, I’m going to end up buying them all for her.”
“Speaking about your girl, I saw her last night,” he said off-handedly as I turned the engine over. “She was at the bar with Alice. I had a drink or two with them. Definitely one, but I’m pretty sure there were more later. They had a pitcher of Margaritas, which is why I said I love ladies’ night. If you’ve got enough friends, you can easily score a few of their cheaper cocktails if you play your cards right.”
For some reason, my spine stiffened when I heard Elyse had been out drinking with him and without me. I blamed it on the strange new green monster that had taken up residence in my chest since she’d come back into my life. It also happened to be the same one that wanted to beat its chest and breathe fire over anyone who even looked at what was his. Mine.
But she wasn’t mine.
The monster didn’t seem to realize that, though. He stirred deep inside me and sent my pulse spiking. “You ran into her at karaoke night? I didn’t know she was out last night.”
“Yeah, I just said I ran into her, didn’t I?” He released a contented-sounding noise from the back of his throat. “Man, you should have been there. My set was great. I sang—”
“I was asking about Elyse, bro. I’ve heard your set many, many times. You don’t need to tell me what you sang. I already know.”
“Oh.” He leaned his head back, humming quietly under his breath before he answered me. “What do you want to know about Elyse, then? I told you she was there with Alice. Why’d you say you didn’t know she’d gone out last night? Should you have known?”
Frustration squeezed at my heart. “No. I shouldn’t have known. I guess I’m just surprised she didn’t let me know.”
“Is she supposed to let you know before she goes out?” A confused frown appeared on his forehead. “It didn’t seem that way to me.”
“No, she isn’t supposed to let me know anything. I don’t know why I said that. My head’s all fucked up when it comes to her these days. Please feel free to ignore that stupid comment. Did she look like she was having fun? What did she say?”
His head came up and one of his brows lifted up so high I could see it climbing above the rim of my glasses. “Hang on just a fucking second here. Are you asking me if she said anything about you? Like you’re some kind of middle school girl with a crush?”
“No.” I was, though. Fuck. “Maybe. I don’t know. Just tell me what happened.”
“Not much actually.” He shrugged his wide shoulders. “We only spent like a minute talking about you. I told her there hasn’t been a day since she arrived that I didn’t hear about her. She asked me if I was serious and that was it.”
My eyes nearly bulged out of my fucking head. “You told her what? Why would you tell her that?”
“Maybe because it’s true.” He licked his lips. “And I’d had a lot of cocktails by then. Makes my tongue wag. Besides, it’s not a big deal. She didn’t seem real interested, didn’t ask what you’d said or anything.”
My heart plummeted, my fingers tightening their grip on the wheel. There was something seriously wrong with me for reacting like this when she apparently hadn’t been interested at all. “Right.”
A new song came on the radio and Mauli cranked up the volume, belting out some pop tune I didn’t know while I tried to get a fucking grip on myself. Elyse had continued to make it perfectly clear that she wasn’t interested in a relationship with me, and yet, here I was, racing to the market first thing in the morning to get her a gift and acting like some kind of schoolgirl.
Honestly, I didn’t even know if she’d remember she’d admired the damn jewelry or if she’d even want it from me. She’d asked Kole to get it for her as a gift after all, not me.
What am I doing? I had no fucking idea.
I didn’t stop, though. I didn’t take Mauli back to his place and go surfing instead. I kept right on going, and after grabbing us each an iced mochaccino on the way to the stall, I marched straight to it and bought her the damn pendant. Along with a thin gold chain.
Mauli stopped me after that, grabbing my forearm when I reached for a bracelet with silver dolphin charms hanging off it. “That’s enough, bro. You got what you came for. Let’s go.”
I gritted my teeth and fought against the part of myself that wanted to buy her everything the merchant had in stock. Well, as much of it as I could afford anyway. But this was exactly why I’d known to bring Mauli with me.
Screwing my eyes shut, I nodded and drew back my arm. “You’re right. Let’s go.”
I thanked the assistant who’d helped me locate the pendant, paid the woman, and got my ass out of there before I bankrupted myself. Mauli stayed close behind me but ended up buying yet another pair of cheap sunglasses before we made it back to the car.
He handed mine back to me, then reclined the seat in the Jeep as soon as we were
in it with his new glasses covering his eyes. “Now that I’ve done my part, I’m going to have a nap. Wake me up when we get back to my house.”
“Will do,” I said. “Thanks for coming with me.”
“No problem, bro. I’ve got your back.” He shot me a grin before turning his head toward the window and was snoring before we even made it out of the parking lot.
After dropping him off, I was just about to head home when my phone buzzed in my pocket. I shifted in the driver’s seat to pull it out. Then my heart kicked into a higher gear when I saw who was calling.
“Elyse, hey,” I said when I answered, a grin plastering itself all over my goddamned face. “How are you feeling? I was just with Mauli and he said he ran into you last night. He seems to be feeling the aftereffects of ladies’ night pretty damn hard.”
She chuckled, the sound lighting me up. “I’m fine. Alice and I made good decisions and didn’t get more than one pitcher of Margaritas.”
“Glad to hear it. At least you saved yourself from having a wicked hangover.”
“Yeah,” she replied, then paused.
“What’s up?” I asked. “I’m assuming you didn’t call to tell me you don’t have a hangover.”
“No, I—” She hesitated again, sighing quietly before she went on. “Can I come over to your place tonight?”
Surprise rocketed through me, but I was fucking thrilled about her request. “Sure, of course. I’ll see you there after work.”
“See you then,” she said, sounding a hell of a lot more confident now that I’d agreed. “Have a good day, Jordan.”
“Yeah, you too.” When we hung up, the stupidly wide grin was still on my lips and it stayed there the whole damn day. Yeah, there’s definitely something wrong with me.
Chapter 28
Elyse
“Okay everybody, it’s time for lunch,” I announced, standing in front of the class and clapping my hands to get their attention. “You’re going to be eating under the trees outside today. Yay!”
Several of the children whooped, their smiles and the excitement in their eyes bright. Warmth filled my heart at the sight of them so happy. They ate outside all the time, but yet, every time the announcement was made, they all acted like it was the first time it was happening. Weird but super cute.
After taking them outside, I went back to the classroom to take my own lunch break. It had been empty when I left, but when I returned, I found Alice waiting for me.
She grinned when I walked in, holding up two paper bags. “So, for my turn for lunch today, we’re having pastrami on rye. Don’t complain. I might have been slightly hungover when my alarm went off and I slept in a bit. Didn’t have time to make anything else.”
“I’d never complain about pastrami on rye,” I said. “I love it. Thank you.”
I accepted my bag and walked with her to the small break room behind our class. We took seats at the circular table and both pulled out our sandwiches.
“I’m glad we decided to take turns bringing lunch,” I said, unwrapping my food. “It sure makes it easier only having to wonder about what to have every second day.”
“I know,” she agreed. “I should have at least brought a salad with the sandwiches, though. I promise I will get more creative next time.”
I waved her off, gesturing to the perfection lying on the table in front of me. “This looks amazing. No salad will ever be able to compete with bread.”
Alice tipped her head back and laughed, then picked up her sandwich. She lifted it to her mouth but didn’t bite into it yet. “How did you feel this morning? No lingering aftereffects from karaoke last night?”
“None,” I said, “but you did do all those shots with Mauli that I didn’t have. Thanks for inviting me by the way. It was fun.”
“Yeah, it’s definitely something we’re going to have to repeat. Often.” She finally had her first bite, chewing and swallowing before heading over to one of the fridges to grab us each a bottle of water. “I’m glad we could take your mind off the man drama for a night.”
I groaned. “Don’t call it that. I don’t have man drama.”
“You totally have man drama.” She set both glass bottles down on the table and slid back into her seat, pointing at my chest with one hand and picking up a water in the other. “Don’t even try to deny it. I know you said you weren’t ready to talk about it, but I saw the look in your eyes when Mauli mentioned this man of yours. There’s definitely more to the story than what you’ve told me.”
I cleared my throat and put my sandwich down again. “Actually, I think I’m ready to talk about it now. Despite Mauli not having said much, what he did say gave me a lot to think about after I got home last night.”
“Okay.” She leaned forward a little, her own lunch abandoned now too. “Hit me. I’m ready for this.”
I sucked in a deliberately deep breath to center myself, then gave her the rundown of what had happened between Jordan and me over the weekend. Alice didn’t interrupt me once, but I could see the wheels in her head turning.
When I was done, she frowned and cocked her head at me. “So what’s the problem? You talked about the future, then you jumped off a cliff. To be honest, it sounds kind of like the same thing to me, but hey.”
“Talking about the future and jumping off a cliff sounds like the same thing to you?” I lifted a brow. “How’s that?”
“Well.” She paused, thinking for a minute before she answered my question. “Talking about the future with a man you know can’t be in yours, even if you want him to be, seems about as risky as jumping off the damn cliff. Except in this case, you walked away from the cliff unscathed but the conversation hurt you.”
“It didn’t hurt me.” I scoffed, but then I realized that was exactly what it had done. Hearing Jordan talking about settling down with someone else really had cut through me like a knife to my very soul. And every time I’d thought about him with someone else after our conversation had ended, that knife got twisted and stuck in deeper.
Damn it. I wasn’t supposed to feel that way. It wasn’t supposed to hurt that badly to hear that he wanted to settle down. Most people wanted to settle down and he was older than I was. It made sense that he’d feel like he was more ready for it.
Despite the rationality—or lack thereof—of feeling what I was feeling though, I couldn’t change the fact that I felt it. I propped my elbows on the table and buried my head in my hands, shaking it as I stared down at my untouched sandwich.
“Okay, you’re right. It did hurt me.”
“I already knew that,” she said knowingly but gently. “The question now is what you’re going to do about it.”
“I don’t know.” I really didn’t. I was only just starting to unravel all the messy emotions that had been rolling around inside me all week. “I really don’t know what to do about him. Things between us have always been complicated, but I kind of feel like we’ve leveled up in complications recently.”
“If it’s so complicated, why not just break it off with him?” she asked, her voice even. I knew what she was doing, and I was suddenly beyond grateful that I had a friend like her to soundboard with.
Instead of answering her immediately, I tried to imagine telling Jordan that we should only be friends. I tried to imagine a world in which I’d never get to touch him again, never get swept away by one of his all-consuming kisses again, never get to go on another adventure with him. I mean, how many other guys are really going to jump off a fucking cliff with me?
The mere thought of all that made my heart feel like it was torn in two. Roughly.
I winced, but I had the answer Alice was waiting for.
“I can’t break it off with him,” I admitted quietly, my throat feeling like it was closing up more and more with each word coming out of my mouth. “He’s the one for me. I just know it.”
At that, my voice cracked and I had to swallow a few times to try ridding myself of the giant lump that had lodged in my throat. “Jo
rdan’s it for me. How is that even possible?”
Alice waited for me to lift my head and look into her eyes before she replied. “Why are you questioning this? You just said you know he’s the one for you. So what’s going on in that head of yours? You look like you’re about to faint.”
“I’m twenty-six years old. I’ve never been in a super-serious, long-term relationship. I’ve only just moved to a new city and started down an entirely different career path. Jordan wants to settle down, Alice. I don’t think he’s actively looking for someone to do it with, but that’s ultimately what he wants. I don’t know if I’m ready to settle down with him or with anyone else right now for that matter.”
“A lot of people are married with kids by the time they’re twenty-six,” she reasoned, cupping her chin between her fingers as her eyes narrowed thoughtfully. “It’s not for everyone, of course, but you’re not way too young or anything like that.”
“Yeah, but I honestly don’t know if I’m ready for it. Even if we’re not talking about marriage and kids immediately because let’s face it, he hasn’t proposed to me or something crazy like that. Let’s say we’re only talking about settling into a relationship and seeing whether things head that way. What if I’m wrong? What if he’s not the guy for me?”
Alice’s blue eyes shone with understanding, a sympathetic smile appearing on her lips. “There are always going to be what-ifs, girl. All I can say is that it’s up to Jordan to make up your mind about him being the guy for you, forsaking all others and all other what-ifs. If he can’t do that, then obviously he’s not the guy for you.”
“How did you get so smart about this stuff?” I asked, my voice choked with emotion because the more I thought about it, the more I knew that he was the guy for me. Even forsaking all others and all other what-ifs. At least, I think he is.
Alice’s smile turned sad. “I told you, I love love. I’ve watched and read enough romance to have a pretty good grip on how these things work. I mean, I know the stories aren’t real, but if so many authors and movie people come up with so many common themes, at least some of it has to be true.”
Have Your Way With Me Page 18
