In My Father’s House

by E. Lynn Harris

  “Why is that?”

  “Come on, Bentley, you know this isn’t me.”

  “Then why are you here?”

  “I scratch Radford’s back and he looks out for me,” he said as if it were a confession. “After we broke up, I ran into some hard times and I’m still trying to work my way back to what I’m used to.”

  “I understand that. It’s tough out here for everybody.”

  He gave me one of those penetrating stares that made it impossible to look away. “So can I see you tonight?”

  “Are you serious?” The shock in my voice was sincere.

  “Yeah, I’d like to spend some time with you.”

  “What about your benefactor?” I sounded mocking.

  “He’ll be asleep the moment I get him back to his hotel suite.”

  I loved the way Warren’s bald head was shining in the evening light. But I refused to let lust distract me from the facts. “I know as an actor Radford works a lot,” I said, “but I was told it cost a million dollars to join this organization. Is he making that kind of money?”

  Warren glanced at the men in the pool as they laughed and splashed. “I don’t know, but some of these guys, especially the ex-football and -basketball players, get free memberships. The first time I came, they offered me one, but like I said, this isn’t my deal.”

  I could still feel the annoying presence of Radford at Warren’s side, even though he was nowhere in sight. “I guess he could be wealthy. He played on that show that’s doing well in syndication. Hey, maybe you can tell him I’m a good guy and he’ll throw some acting business my way.”

  Warren looked into my eyes and said, “You know I’ll do whatever you ask me, Bentley. Are you still in business with Alex?”

  I smiled. “Yeah, we’re still partners. What happened to the young lady you left me for?”

  Warren’s broad shoulders rose up in a quick shrug. “She’s still around, but we aren’t as cool as we used to be. If I take the job down here, we’ll be done for sure.”

  “Is that what you want?” I watched a gorgeous guy push Jah’s raft up and down the length of the pool. Grinning, Jah saw me and raised his drink, as if toasting. Then his expression switched to “oops, I forgot!” and he tried to hide the drink behind his back.

  Warren stepped in front of me, blocking my view of Jah. He stared into my eyes with a seductive look and said, “Let’s talk about me and you.”

  I sipped my wine and said nonchalantly, “Why would I want to do that?”

  His voice softened as he said, “Because you love me and you know I love you, despite some of my actions.”

  “So that was love?” I let a semidisgusted look shoot from my eyes.

  “Come on, Bentley. Can I see you tonight?”

  “Not tonight, Warren.” It felt so good to feel in control and not cater to this man’s romantic whims. “Now if you’ll excuse me, Chef LaBron has cooked an excellent meal and I’m suddenly very hungry.”

  “Is your cell number still the same?”

  “Why don’t you find out?”

  When the party started to wind down just before 3:00 A.M., I made contact with all of my models. Everybody seemed in good spirits and glad that they’d done the event.

  “Good looking out, Bentley,” Godfrey said. “I had a good time and made a few important connections. It feels good to be told how handsome you are all night. Females tell you once and that’s it.”

  I smiled. “Glad you had a good time. Have you seen Jah?”

  “Jah? You talking about the young kid?”

  “Yeah.”

  Godfrey nodded. “I saw him in the pool, then I saw him when he left, getting into a silver Shadow that just appeared out of nowhere.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “I’m pretty sure it was him. I haven’t seen him since.”

  A panicky feeling shot through me. I had to find Sterling. I hurried into the kitchen, where he was sitting at a metal table and writing checks.

  “Sterling, where is Jah?” My voice was urgent, but he didn’t even look up.

  “I think he got lucky.”

  “What?”

  “Very lucky,” Sterling said, ripping a check from the pad and starting another one.

  “What are you talking about?” My angry voice echoed through the kitchen.

  “He’s fine.” Sterling looked up at me like I was crazy for asking about Jah. “Don’t worry about him. He’s in good hands.”

  I took my cell phone out of my jacket pocket and dialed Jah’s number. Voice mail clicked on before the first ring. Then I texted him: “Call me right away!”

  I turned to Sterling and demanded, “Who did he leave with?”

  “Let’s just say, royalty.” Sterling’s playfulness really set me off. “He got the prize of the night or shall I say, he’s getting the prize of the evening.”

  “That kid just turned eighteen. He’s a virgin.”

  “So I heard,” Sterling said with delight.

  “How did you know that?”

  “It seems it spread just like the caviar on toast points tonight.” Sterling licked his finger to lift the next check, then ripped it off, and started the next one.

  “Damn!” I almost shouted, hating all my thoughts about what Jah was doing right now. “I can’t believe this shit! I thought you told me my guys weren’t expected to have sex.”

  “I did.” Sterling looked at me as he sipped a glass of ice water. “But we agreed they could all make adult decisions. I think fem boi Gabriel is going to be the star of another party at the Four Seasons downtown with two very rich, very hung older men.”

  “This is crazy. Who did Jah leave with?”

  “Calm down, Bentley. He’s fine. The last time I checked, eighteen is very legal. They can vote at that age, you know.”

  I ignored Sterling. I was mad and worried.

  Who had Jah left with? And would he remember all the things I’d told him about gay men, and how to protect himself from the worst of them?

  TWELVE

  I was pouring cream in my coffee when I heard a knock at the door. After being up so late and now feeling so sluggish, I needed this caffeine jolt so badly, I didn’t bother to turn on the lights in my modern, all-white kitchen. Even though I was only wearing pajama bottoms, I placed the creamer on the counter and dashed down the hallway lined with colorful paintings of athletic men.

  When I swung the door open, the morning sunshine was painfully bright in my eyes. But it wasn’t anywhere near as bright as the huge smile on Jah’s face.

  “What’s up, B?” Jah walked in, wearing the same clothes that he’d worn to the party. “Man, what a night.”

  I closed the door and glared at him. “Where the hell have you been? I have been worried to death about your ass! Jah, where did you go?”

  The dreamy look in his eyes let me know he hadn’t even heard the anger in my loud voice.

  He stepped into the living room—no, he floated into the living room—and sat on the cobalt blue suede couch. “B, I had the most amazing night. I will never be able to repay you for taking me to that party. I got a life now.”

  I was too mad to sit, so I stood in front of the glass coffee table, glaring down at him. “What happened? I was looking all over for you! Why didn’t you answer your phone or text me back?”

  Jah sighed like he was slipping into a bubble bath. “I was falling in love.”

  “What?!” Alarm shot through my whole body ten times stronger than any cup of coffee could wake me up.

  “I met the man of my dreams last night.” Jah stretched his arms against the back of the couch and sat with his legs wide, like he was lounging.

  “Who?”

  “The Emperor.”

  “What?” I wanted to jump over the coffee table and shake some sense into him.

  “Yes, I met him at the party in the pool. I’ve been floating on a cloud ever since.”

  “Jah, do you know who that is? He’s married.”

&n
bsp; “In name only, B. And I think he feels the same way about me. Do you have some juice?”

  “Come with me in the kitchen,” I said, walking fast to vent my anger and digest what Jah was telling me. When we reached the kitchen, I sipped my lukewarm coffee and poured Jah some apple juice.

  “So I need a favor,” Jah said, sitting at the gray metal café table, where I served his juice and sat down as well.

  “What?” For a second, I thought I could relax and just be glad that Jah had safely shown up at my door. But the twinkle in his eye hinted that he was up to something.

  “B, can I leave my car here and can you give me a ride to the airport?”

  “Where are you going? Don’t you have school?”

  He sipped the juice as if I were bringing up an irrelevant point. “It’s okay for me to miss a few days. I’m going to Los Angeles.”

  “L.A.?” I snapped. Every word coming out of Jah’s mouth was cranking me up to a higher notch of angry. “For what?”

  “To see E.” He sighed. “He flew back this morning on a private charter, but he called me from his plane and told me he had a ticket waiting for me. Isn’t that romantic?” Jah’s whole face was still brighter than the sun. “I wonder if the hotel we’re staying at is going to be as nice as the one last night. I didn’t know they had hotels like that in Miami.”

  “Jah, you can’t do that!” I felt a pang of protectiveness over Jah like I’d never experienced.

  “What do you mean, I can’t go to see my man? I’m grown, B. I’m responsible for myself. I always have been.”

  “But what do you know about this man?”

  “I know he makes me feel special like no one has ever done.”

  “All that after one night? Get real, Jah.” Men like “E,” as Jah called him, could buy and sell a thousand boi toys in a day. And they were masters at making their newest boi of the moment feel like a prince, the only prince.

  Jah shot me a disappointed look. “B, I thought you’d be happy for me. You always say you want me to be happy. But now that it’s happened, you want to become a hater?”

  I shook my head. “Jah, it’s not being a hater. You might be getting in over your head.” I sipped my cold coffee, then shot up out of my chair and put it in the microwave.

  “B, why would you say that?”

  “That guy is old enough to be your father,” I said over the low hum of the microwave.

  “But he’s not my father. Remember, I never had one of those.”

  “Is that what this is all about? You’re looking for a father?”

  “No. From what I do know, you don’t make love with your father.”

  The microwave buzzed as if reacting to the alarm that Jah was setting off inside me.

  “Jah!” I almost shouted. Jah had told me time and time again he was waiting for the right man. I had hoped that it would be with someone closer to his own age. Jah hadn’t had intercourse but he’d told me about heavy petting, grinding, and I was pretty sure a little oral sex. “Jah, don’t tell me you had sex with this guy!”

  “Yes,” he said, “and it was magical, just like you said it would be. E is so gentle. It didn’t even hurt as much as I thought it would.” Jah smiled. “Even though he’s got a nice piece of equipment on him.”

  I had to turn away from his love-swept expression, so I opened the microwave and removed my hot coffee cup. I took a sip, then turned to face him. “Jah, please tell me you’re making this all up. And his name isn’t E or Emperor. His name is Seth Sinclair and he has a family.”

  Jah showed no reaction. “I know. But if that’s what he wants me to call him, then that’s what I’ll call him.”

  I sat down and said, “Please tell me you used protection.”

  Jah looked away and took a long swallow of his juice, obviously to avoid answering my question.

  “Jah, answer me. Did you use protection?” I gripped my cup so hard, my fingertips were burning.

  “It all happened so quickly,” he said. “I didn’t go with him to have sex. It just happened. And by that, I mean we slept together all night holding each other and when we woke up this morning, it just happened. I promise to use protection the next time.”

  I slammed the cup on the table.

  “Are you fucking crazy?” I shouted. “Did you at least ask his HIV status?”

  “No, but I don’t have to. Look at him. He’s healthy. He’s married and like you said, has kids. He’s a movie star and if he had AIDS, don’t you think it would be all over the Internet?”

  I wanted to slap the naïve look off his handsome face. “That’s your logic? When did you lose your brains, Jah?”

  Jah looked at his watch, then at me. “Are you going to take me to the airport and can I leave my car here?”

  “What if I say no?”

  “Then I’ll just drive myself and park at the airport.”

  I shook my head. “Jah, are you sure you should be doing this? Have you even ever been on a plane?”

  Jah stood, pulling his jangling keys from his jeans pocket. “No, but Seth said it’ll be just fine. I’m actually looking forward to it.”

  I stood, looking at him with a pleading expression. “Jah, please listen to me and reconsider. If this guy is really for you, make him come back to see you. Once you get on that plane, then you’re on his territory and he’ll be in control totally.”

  Jah shrugged. “I don’t care about that.”

  “You should.”

  “I’ve got to go. Are you taking me?”

  I stared at him for a moment, thinking I’d already done enough when it came to this budding romance.

  “I can’t do it,” I said.

  “Why are you being this way?”

  “Because I care about you.”

  “Well, you sure don’t act like it. I guess I’ll see you when I get back.” He stormed toward the hallway.

  “Will you text me when you land?”

  “If you want me to.”

  “I do. Jah, please be safe and promise me you’ll use protection. In fact, wait a minute. I have something for you.”

  I raced into my bathroom and located the tin canister where I kept my condoms. I took out three gold wrappers, then returned to the hallway and gave them to Jah.

  “Make sure, if you engage in sex, to use these. Do I make myself clear, Jah?”

  “I promise you, but I’m sure E will have some.”

  “You need your own. How long are you staying?”

  “I don’t know. Maybe just a couple days, but I’ll let you know.”

  “Okay.”

  Jah gave me quick hug and walked swiftly out the door without turning around to look at me.

  THIRTEEN

  I almost had a wreck driving into the office. I couldn’t get Jah off my mind. What was he getting himself into by becoming involved with Seth Sinclair? Had I done enough in trying to prevent him from getting on the plane? Or was I simply jealous that maybe this was going to turn out good for him?

  When I got to the garage of my office building, my cell phone vibrated. I didn’t even look to see who was calling and hoped it might be Jah.

  “Hello.”

  “What’s up, Bent?”

  “Warren,” I said, not sure how I felt about hearing his deep voice through my phone. “Are you still in Miami?”

  “Yeah. Where are you?”

  “I’m heading into my office,” I said as I pressed the elevator button.

  “You got a busy day?”

  “It depends.”

  “On what?”

  “What you call busy.”

  “I want to see you today.”

  “Now, why do you want to do that?” I asked, smiling at my reflection in the silver elevator doors.

  “Don’t make me beg, Bentley.”

  “I like having you beg.” The elevators door opened. I stepped in and pushed eight.

  Warren had a seductive tone when he said, “I’ll do whatever it takes to see you.” Damn, I forgo
t how sexy and persuasive Warren could be.

  “I’m on the elevator, so I might lose you.”

  “But you’ll find your way back to me, won’t you?”

  “I will.” I was a little surprised the elevator hadn’t dropped the connection.

  “Bent, you still there?”

  “Yep.”

  “So you didn’t lose me,” Warren said playfully, as if he loved the double meaning of what he said.

  “Warren, what do you want to do?”

  “Let’s go to our place.”

  “Our place?” I wasn’t in the mood for a guessing game. And I didn’t appreciate how it seemed like he just wanted to get with me when it was convenient for him.

  But Warren’s voice had far more than lust in it when he said, “Let’s go up to those little cabins on Lake St. Clair in Canada.”

  “That would take too long,” I said.

  “But I want to spend some time with you,” Warren said.

  “I know this place up at Clearwater Lake that has these really nice cabins; we can drive.”

  “That sounds good.”

  “Are you serious?” I smiled again.

  “Yes, I am, boo.”

  I let my ears savor the sound of him calling me that again. “When?”

  “Right now.”

  “I’ve got work to do,” I said as I stepped off the elevator and into my office.

  “Then after work,” Warren said as I smiled at Laura in the reception area. “I’ve got a real nice rental car. I’ll come and pick you up.”

  “Those words ‘nice’ and ‘rental car’ don’t even go together, Warren.”

  He chuckled. “Wait ’til you see it. Are you game?”

  “It might be nice.”

  “You know it’ll be nice.”

  As I walked past Alex’s office, she looked up from her desk and said, “Hey, Bentley.” I must have been grinning because she stared at me, then smiled like she was glad I looked happier than I had in a while. A romantic getaway with this gorgeous hunk of man on the line was definitely boosting me into a better mood.

  “I have to go back home and pack a bag.”

  “I can do it for you,” Warren said, “or I can pick up some things for you. It looks like you still wear the same size.”