The Wall of Winnipeg and Me

by Mariana Zapata

  I lifted up a shoulder and smiled down at him. “I appreciate it anyway.”

  He blinked those slumbering brown eyes, his nostrils flaring just enough for me to notice. “You have no idea how terrible you make me feel sometimes.”

  Wait. What? “Why?”

  He sat forward, setting the puzzle pieces in his hands aside. “You’re thanking me for defending you, Van. You shouldn’t have to thank me for something like that.”

  I didn’t have to tell him that, once upon a time, he hadn’t and wouldn’t have defended me. If I hadn’t agreed to marry him, he wouldn’t be in my debt. At this point, I had no house. He hadn’t paid any of my student loans yet. The scale wasn’t exactly balanced between the two of us. Yet I refused to believe he’d simply done it because of that reason.

  Some part of me recognized that Aiden did care about me… now… in his own way. I just wasn’t going to overanalyze why that was. It wasn’t like I took it too seriously, just seriously enough to appreciate it. To know it meant something—just not everything.

  “Well, I just want you to know I don’t take it for granted. That’s all.”

  He hummed, his face flat and expressionless, barely tethered and thoughtful.

  “You can watch television down here if you want,” he added suddenly.

  What the hell? “You sure? You don’t mind if I keep you company?” I asked, a little more shyly than I would have thought.

  That had him rolling his eyes, blowing out a breath, and shaking his head. “Stop talking and sit down.” He nodded, getting to his feet and heading into the kitchen without another word.

  Suddenly uncomfortable, I cleared my throat and took a seat on the opposite end of the couch, crossing my heels as I placed my bowl in my lap. Grabbing the remote, I turned on the television and started flipping through the channels before settling on one of my favorite movies. If Aiden thought it was weird when he came back and found me watching Wall-E, he didn’t say a word.

  He also didn’t get up and go sit in the kitchen.

  Chapter Nineteen

  The next day, my phone rang in the late afternoon.

  Aiden flashed across the screen. He’d called me twice before, and that had been when he’d been standing outside my door back at my apartment and to bail on me.

  I hit the ‘answer’ button. “Hello?”

  “Vanessa.” He didn’t ask if it was me; he just sort of said my name, as if demanding it to be.

  “Yes?”

  “My car won’t start,” he said in a tone that sounded accusatory, but couldn’t have been. What did he think? That I went and booby-trapped his starter? If I hadn’t done it when he used to piss me off, why would I do it now when he hadn’t recently?

  “Is your battery dead?” I asked, confused. He had leased it brand new only a year ago, there was no way it needed a new battery so soon.

  He muttered something under his breath, his tone abrupt. “I’ve already taken care of it. There’s a tow truck on its way.”

  Uh. “Okay. What do you need then?”

  “Can you pick me up?” he just went right out and asked.

  I blinked, surprised that he was calling me and not taking a cab. “Oh. Sure. Where are you?”

  “I’m at the main building. Where the team trains,” he replied, fully aware that I knew what place he was referring to. I’d been there a few times in the past. “I need to go pick up some papers from the immigration lawyer’s office today, too.”

  Eyeing the thunderstorm going on outside through one of the windows in my room, I sighed. I hated driving in the rain, but he rarely asked for any favors… unless they were major, life-changing ones. Whomp, whomp. “Sure. I’ll be there as soon as I can.”

  He grunted out a “Thank you” that was as forced as it sounded and hung up.

  Some things never changed, did they? I smirked, saved my work, grabbed my purse, and headed downstairs to nab my keys. In a little more than no time, I made it to the facility I wasn’t sure I’d ever come back to and showed the old pass Aiden had gotten me to get in through the security gate.

  My phone’s ringtone going off scared the hell out of me as I steered my car toward the correct building and parking lot. Half expecting it to be Aiden, I was surprised when Diana’s name flashed across the screen.

  “Her—”

  “How could you not tell me?” the familiar voice on the other end of the line yelled.

  Shit. “Hello to you too.”

  “Don’t you ‘hello to you too,’ cabrona.”

  Okay. She’d gone with cabrona. That was how pissed off she was. Fair enough.

  “Do you want to know how I found out?” I didn’t, but she didn’t bother waiting for me to confirm an answer she should know. “Rodrigo told me!”

  I winced.

  As if I hadn’t heard her the first time, she yelled again. “Rodrigo!”

  I wasn’t going to apologize. I knew it would just make it worse. I was aware of how things worked with her. At this point, the only thing to do that wouldn’t piss her off more was to man-up to what I’d done and let her ream me.

  “You got married and you didn’t tell me!”

  I stayed quiet and kept an eye out on the building to make sure Aiden wasn’t appearing.

  “It’s because you think I’d tell everyone, isn’t it?”

  That was definitely the wrong question to answer. So I kept my mouth shut.

  “You don’t love me anymore? Is that it? Am I old news?”

  Still, I kept my mouth closed.

  “I can’t believe you!” She let out a shriek that seemed to echo. Knowing her, she was more than likely in her car. “I’m going to punch you in the cooch.”

  At that, my silence ended. “I’d like to see you try.” She hadn’t grown up with my sisters. I knew how to fight a girl.

  At least better than she did.

  “No! Don’t talk to me right now,” she insisted. “You didn’t tell me you got married. You’re on probation, and I need to get back to work. I’m on my lunch break. If you want to get back on my good side this year, I’d like some of those chocolate-dipped strawberries.”

  That had me snorting. She was out of her damn mind.

  “You owe me.” With that, she hung up as I pulled into the parking lot I was looking for. I let my forehead drop onto the steering wheel. That had gone better and worse than I’d imagined it would, but I was a little relieved it was out in the open, finally.

  I drummed my fingers on the steering wheel as I looked around the empty lot. I wavered on getting out when a giant lightning bolt painted a jagged streak across the rainy lavender-gray sky. Minutes passed and still he didn’t come out of the Three Hundreds’ building.

  Damn it. Before I could talk myself out of it, I jumped out of the car, cursing at myself for not carrying an umbrella for about the billionth time and for not having waterproof shoes, and ran through the parking lot, straight through the double doors. As I stomped my feet on the mat, I looked around the lobby for the big guy. A woman behind the front desk raised her eyebrows at me curiously. “Can I help you with something?” she asked.

  “Have you seen Aiden?”

  “Aiden?”

  Were there really that many Aidens? “Graves.”

  “Can I ask what you need him for?”

  I bit the inside of my cheek and smiled at the woman who didn’t know me and, therefore, didn’t have an idea that I knew Aiden. “I’m here to pick him up.”

  It was obvious she didn’t know what to make of me. I didn’t exactly look like pro-football player girlfriend material in that moment, much less anything else. I’d opted not to put on any makeup since I hadn’t planned on leaving the house. Or real pants. Or even a shirt with the sleeves intact. I had cut-off shorts and a baggy T-shirt with sleeves that I’d taken scissors to. Plus the rain outside hadn’t done my hair any justice. It looked like a cloud of teal.

  Then there was the whole we-don’t-look-anything-alike thing going on, so there
was no way we could pass as siblings. Just as I opened my mouth, the doors that connected the front area with the rest of the training facility swung open. The man I was looking for came out with his bag over his shoulder, imposing, massive, and sweaty. Definitely surly too, which really only meant he looked the way he always did.

  I couldn’t help but crack a little smile at his grumpiness. “Ready?”

  He did his form of a nod, a tip of his chin.

  I could feel the receptionist’s eyes on us as he approached, but I was too busy taking in Grumpy Pants to bother looking at anyone else. Those brown eyes shifted to me for a second, and that time, I smirked uncontrollably.

  He glared down at me. “What are you smiling at?”

  I shrugged my shoulders and shook my head, trying to give him an innocent look. “Oh, nothing, sunshine.”

  He mouthed ‘sunshine’ as his gaze strayed to the ceiling.

  We ran out of the building side by side toward my car. Throwing the doors open, I pretty much jumped inside and shivered, turning the car and the heater on. Aiden slid in a lot more gracefully than I had, wet but not nearly as soaked.

  He eyed me as he buckled in, and I slanted him a look. “What?”

  With a shake of his head, he unzipped his duffel, which was sitting on his lap, and pulled out that infamous off-black hoodie he always wore. Then he held it out.

  All I could do was stare at it for a second. His beloved, no-name brand, extra-extra-large hoodie. He was offering it to me.

  When I first started working for Aiden, I remembered him specifically giving me instructions on how he wanted it washed and dried. On gentle and hung to dry. He loved that thing. He could own a thousand just like it, but he didn’t. He had one black hoodie that he wore all the time and a blue one he occasionally donned.

  “For me?” I asked like an idiot.

  He shook it, rolling his eyes. “Yes for you. Put it on before you get sick. I would rather not have to take care of you if you get pneumonia.”

  Yeah, I was going to ignore his put-out tone and focus on the ‘rather not’ as I took it from him and slipped it on without another word. His hoodie was like holding a gold medal in my hands. Like being given something cherished, a family relic. Aiden’s precious.

  I couldn’t help but glance at him out of the corner of my eye from time to time as I drove. The radio wasn’t on and it was one thing for us to eat at the counter together quietly but a totally different thing for us to be in the car not saying a word. “Did they tell you what was wrong with your car?” I made myself ask.

  “The driver thought it was something with the computer.”

  That made sense. I gripped the steering wheel a little tighter as more lightning filled the horizon. “Has your training been going okay?”

  “Fine.”

  “Please tell me more,” I snickered. “At least you’ve won all your games so far.”

  “Barely,” he said in a thin tone that seemed sandwiched between frustration and anger.

  I’d seen a short segment just yesterday about this superstar the Three Hundreds had played against a few days ago, and I’d been amazed. “That guy from Green Bay was huge.”

  I could feel the insulted expression he was shooting my way even though I was facing forward. “He isn’t that big,” he corrected me with a huff.

  He was though. I’d seen pictures of the guy the Three Hundreds were playing against, and I’d seen him on television. The guy was six foot five and just shy of three hundred pounds; he was definitely stockier than Aiden and I could tell those extra pounds weren’t pure muscle, but big was big. I kept my mouth shut though and didn’t insist he was wrong. I could pretend his opponent hadn’t been the size of Delaware. Sure.

  “Well, your team won.”

  Aiden shifted around in his seat. “I could have played better.”

  What could I say to that? I’d sat through enough interviews with people fawning all over him to know that Aiden soaked up every single one of his imperfections and every mistake he’d ever committed. It was stupid and wonderful how much he expected of himself. Nothing was ever good enough. He had so much to improve on, according to him.

  “Oh, Aiden.”

  “What?”

  “You’re the best in the country—and I’m not just saying that to be nice—and it means nothing to you.”

  He made a dismissive noise, those long fingers resting on his knee kind of flicked up in a dismissive gesture. “I want to be remembered years from now. I have to win a championship for that.”

  Something about his tone pecked at my brain, at that part of me that had stayed up for years to quit my day job one day. “Then you’ll be happy?” I asked carefully.

  “Maybe.”

  I wasn’t sure what it was about his ‘maybe’ that chewed up my insides. “You’ve won Defensive Player of the Year three years out of eight, big guy. I don’t think anyone will ever forget you. I’m just saying. You should be proud of yourself. You’ve worked hard for it.”

  He didn’t agree or disagree, but when I turned to look at the passenger side mirror, he was facing out the window with what amounted to about the most thoughtful expression I’d ever seen.

  Maybe.

  On the other hand, I might have been imagining it.

  My phone started ringing loudly from its spot where I’d left it in the cup holder. I glanced at it, but the screen was faced down, and I couldn’t get a good look without grabbing it, which I sure as hell wasn’t going to do, especially not when the rain started slapping the windshield more forcefully. As quickly as the ringing came on, it went out.

  Then it started all over again.

  “Are you going to answer that?” Aiden asked.

  “I don’t like to talk on the phone when I’m driving,” I explained, just as the phone stopped ringing.

  He hummed.

  Then it started once more.

  With a sigh, he grabbed it and looked at the screen. “It’s your mom.”

  Oh shit. “Don’t—”

  “Hello?” the big guy answered, putting the phone to his face. “She’s busy.” I turned my head to see his lower lip slightly jutting out. “I’ll make sure to let her know.” By the amount of anger in his enunciation, that was the last thing he was planning on doing.

  How about that. Before I could thank him for his phone answering skills, he touched my phone’s screen and set it back into the cup holder. Wariness wiggled around in my belly and I cleared my throat. “My best friend finally found out we got married.”

  “I thought you told her.”

  “She knew we were going to do it, but I didn’t tell her we actually did. She said her brother told her, so I wonder how he found out.”

  “She didn’t tell you?”

  Thinking about how the conversation had gone again, I smirked at myself. “No. She was too busy yelling.”

  Aiden made a thoughtful yet absent sound.

  “That might be why my mom called. I’m usually the one who calls her.” Except for when she’d called in the wake of my failed trip to El Paso. Just thinking about it made me mad all over again. Maybe I’d wait to call her back… next month. I shook the bitter thought off. “Where’s your lawyer’s office at?”

  Thirty minutes later, I pulled my Explorer into the multi-level covered parking lot adjacent to a tall professional office building.

  “I’ll wait here,” I said, turning off the engine.

  Aiden shook his head as he opened the car door. “Come with me.”

  I eyed my legs and then shook my own head. “I’m not really dressed…”

  The big guy didn’t even take in anything other than my face. “You always look fine. Come on.”

  He didn’t wait for me to argue. He just shut the door on me.

  I growled under my breath and got out, tugging my damp bottoms down and realizing that Aiden’s hoodie was actually so long it went over my shorts… Great.

  With a resigned sigh, I found Aiden waiting for me off t
o the side. At least he had the decency not to mock me for how much of a mess I looked. Thunder and lightning shook the walking bridge we had to take to cross over from the lot to the building, and I might have walked a little faster than usual. Aiden had barely opened the door for me when the lights inside the building went in and out for a second.

  The lights in the hallway flickered twice more as we walked to the elevator bank. Then they blinked again just as the big guy pressed the button to go up.

  I paused, taking in the deserted hallway. “Should we take the stairs?”

  He gave me a side look that said what he was thinking—you’re an idiot, Vanessa. Instead, he verbally went with, “I’m too tired.”

  Oh. Huh. “Okay.”

  Before I could think too much more about the consequences of riding around in an elevator during a storm, the doors slid open. A couple was already inside, and they shuffled over into the corner to give us room when we entered. I didn’t miss the way the man’s eyes widened as Aiden backed against the opposite corner where they were, across from the doors. I put my back against the wall closest to him. “What floor, big guy?”

  “Six.”

  Pressing the button, the lights blinked again as the doors shut. Wariness made my stomach churn as the elevator eased its way upward. The lights flashed one more time before the elevator jerked, stopping, plunging us into total darkness.

  One, two, three, four—

  Holy shit.

  Holy freaking shit.

  I tried to blink as the other woman in the elevator squealed, and her partner asked, “What the hell?”

  There wasn’t even an emergency light on.

  It was pitch black.

  Shouldn’t there have been a backup light?

  Panic instantly seized my throat. Okay, it gripped my entire body, stringing every muscle so tight it hurt. In the time it took me to suck in a breath, my body began shaking. I made myself squeeze my eyes closed, ignoring the couple whispering in the corner.

  Okay. Okay.

  Everything was okay.

  Everything would be okay, I told myself.

  I was fine.