Second Chance with My Bull Rider

by Allie Bock

  “Are you looking for someone in particular?” Damien leaned his elbows on the table. His empty glass resting between them.

  “Or are you just stretching your neck?” Pete quipped, before stretching his arms behind his head. I didn’t know what to say to either one. Both grinned at me with that mischievous twinkle in their eyes. A pang hit my chest. I missed my two best friends. We had been friends since grade school when Damien’s family moved to town. I propped my bad leg on the edge of the booth.

  “Nah, I’m just looking for Damien’s next date.” I shot back.

  Damien snorted and Pete waved down a waitress. He held up five fingers. “I don’t date, man. You know that.” Damien muttered, mock glaring at me.

  “You’re missing out on the best part of life.” Pete drew Melanie to his side and kissed her full on the lips. She blushed a deep pink before wrapping her hands around his neck and kissing him back. I was happy for Pete, and a little jealous. Veronica’s eyes bore holes into me. I caught her gaze and the corner of my mouth tipped up. Lindsay carried a tray with five beers over my head to set it down on our table.

  “I didn’t know you worked here, too.” I grabbed a beer and handed her a couple of dollars.

  “Yep, gotta make ends meet.” She pocketed the change and passed out the rest of the glasses. “I might take up boarding horses, though.” She snapped her gum. “If all horses are as easy as Delilah’s”

  “Delilah’s?” Confusion clouded my mind. I glanced at the rest of the group, but they didn’t seem bothered by Lindsay’s comment and had moved on to other conversations.

  Lindsay shrugged. “Yep, those ten horses are loving life on my uncle’s ranch. My old horse is enjoying their company.”

  “Ten?” I felt like a broken record.

  She nodded and hurried away to another table. The band started playing country songs. Pete drew Melanie onto the floor where they two-stepped and spun around. I sipped my drink while Damien stared down into his glass, watching the bubbles rise to the surface. Veronica slid closer to me. I could tell she wanted to dance, but I was still in a cast and not very stable. Again, my eyes searched the room for the one person I couldn’t find. The song changed to a slow, romantic beat. Couples swayed on the dance floor as the lights dimmed.

  “Kade, what’s going on with us?” Veronica whispered, shooting looks over at Damien, who was staring out at the crowd with a scowl on his face. I turned towards her. I drew in a big breath about to answer when she placed her finger on my lips. “Let me continue first, I thought we had some sparks or something. But I realized I was wrong. I wish there were something between us. But you look at Delilah like the world revolves around her.” My mouth opened and closed like a fish. “Is there anything between us?”

  I shook my head. “I love you like a sister, and I care for you and little Claire because of Ben.” She stood up and wrapped me in a hug. I hugged her back.

  “Then go talk to her.” She whispered as tears glistened in her eyes.

  What was with everyone and telling me to talk to Delilah? At that moment, Delilah walked into the room. Our eyes met over Veronica’s shoulder. Delilah’s gaze hardened. She squeezed her way up to the bar to talk to Lindsay.

  “I’m going home. I miss Claire. You take care, Kade Kisment. And don’t forget to visit us soon.” Veronica wiped away a tear, kissed my cheek, and walked to the door.

  My emotions rolled. She knew, and I think everyone knew, except for me and Delilah. I gathered my crutches and made my way to the bar. Delilah leaned against the bar, flirting with a cowboy from another ranch. I elbowed my way in between them, cutting off the cowboy with a stare.

  “Dee, we need to talk,” I leaned in to whisper in her ear.

  “No.” She glared at me before placing her drink on the bar.

  “Yes.” I grabbed at her hand to keep her attention on me.

  “Give me a good reason to talk to you instead of him.” She gestured to the lanky cowboy next to me. I glanced at him. He tipped his hat back on his head and smiled broadly at me.

  “You drive me crazy... just come outside.” I tugged on her hand, catching her gaze. She stood still at that moment, her eyes searching my face.

  “Okay.” She left a couple of bills on the counter. I smirked at the cowboy before I maneuvered both of us through the crowd as best as I could with the crutches, meaning I didn’t smash anyone’s toes or spill anyone’s beer.

  The night air was cool and brisk, the stars twinkled in the sky, and a full moon lit up the parking lot. A couple of smokers vacated a bench when I came out. I hobbled over to it, nodding to them. I sank onto the rough-hewn wood and leaned my head against the block building. Cars flew by on the highway not far away. A couple argued by their truck and another couple kissed under a large palm tree. She blocked out the light from the moon as she stared down at me.

  “What do you want to talk about?” She crossed her arms over her chest. The plaid shirt gaped showing a white tank underneath. I dragged my eyes up to her large brown ones. The mascara and eyeliner made them larger than ever. I missed the way they seem to peer into my soul. I cleared my throat.

  “Do you want to sit next to me?” I slid over on the bench and she perched on the edge. “Veronica and I aren’t together.” Her eyebrows went up, but she didn’t say a word. I swallowed against the lump in my throat and continued. “Her husband, Ben, was my traveling partner on the circuit... A bull made creamed corn out of his body...and ... I made a promise to him... to take of care her and Claire.” Tears threatened as I thought about that day, the horribleness of the accident, and how fast he died. The words lodged in my throat. Delilah reached for my hand and stroked it with one long finger. “She is like a sister to me.” I managed to croak out.

  She wrapped me in a hug as I fought to keep my emotions together. “So not a current or ex-girlfriend?”

  I shook my head.

  “That’s good. She was irritating the snot out of me. Hovering but not doing anything to help,” she said with fire flashing in her eyes.

  “She probably never had to care for a sick person before. Ben was very smart with their money. Both of his girls are set for life.”

  “Why do you have to care for them, then?” She tucked a piece of hair behind her ear and folded her feet under her.

  “Veronica isn’t good with money. I take care of their finances and provide emotional support for both her and her daughter. It isn’t easy to lose someone.” I drew back to stare into her eyes. The swirling browns and golds pulled me in as time stood still.

  “I know. I lost you,” she whispered. She leaned into me. Her lavender perfume engulfed me. Her full, pink lips parted inches from mine. With my heart hammering in my chest, I closed the gap and pressed against her. It was soft and slow, just a connection. Our lips moved against one another, rekindling a passion that was burned a long time ago. She pulled back from me. My fingers ran down her scalp to tangle in her black hair.

  “Why do you need money so bad?” I asked, I had to know why.

  “What?” Her forehead wrinkled as confusion colored her eyes.

  “I overheard you and Kaleb talking the other day.” I brushed my fingers over her cheek. She closed her eyes and leaned into my touch. Swallowing, I attempted to get the right words out to ask her about the money and the horses. “I assumed he is paying you to be my nurse, but why did you need an advance?” Her eyes snapped open as she leaned away from me. The loss of her warmth left me shivering. Wrong words, Kade. I wanted to take them back the minute I said them.

  “I made a rash decision and now have to deal with the consequences.” She twirled a bit of hair around her finger, not looking me in the eye.

  “But tell me why. I might be able to help you.” I grasped at the hand to still it, silently begging her to tell me what was going on. She stared at me for a long time, so long that I wasn’t sure she was going to answer. She turned in her seat and brushed her hair back.

  “Melanie and I are starting a therapeu
tic riding stable.” Her shoulders drooped. “We had everything ready until Mr. Giffery died. Then, we had to start over. He was putting up the money for us and the land.” Her spine straightened and she looked me in the eye, challenging me.

  “But why do you need the money so bad?” I thought she had a great job in the hospital.

  “I quit my job.” Her eyes got wide and frantic. “I can’t go back. I have anxiety attacks just thinking about going back to work in the hospital. Then Kaleb said I could take care of you for the amount I need.” She smiled at me slyly. “As long as you follow the doctor’s orders.”

  I didn’t know what to say. She always tended to downplay how bad things were. With the little she told me, she must be hard up for cash and all to start a therapeutic riding stable.

  “For kids?” I set my arm around the back of the bench to bring her in closer to me.

  “Yep.” She scrolled through her phone and pulled up pictures of a little girl with pigtails on a little brown pony.

  “She sure is cute,” I said, an ache settled deep inside of me.

  “They make everything worth it.” She gazed at the photo with love and my heart constricted for her. I pulled her into my arms and held her. This woman was everything my heart needed. All I had to do was convince her of it. Music floated through the open doors of the bar. She sighed and leaned her head against me as the stars twinkled in the night sky.

  Chapter 14 October 10th

  Kade

  The usual clanging of pots and pans was absent this morning when I woke up. I rubbed the sleep from my eyes and tried to go back to the dream I was having about Delilah. I glanced at the clock next to my bed. The red numbers read nine o’clock in the morning. A late start for being on the ranch, but the regular ranch noise was quiet. I wondered where Dee was. She always had the house up and running before sunrise. I swung my legs over the side of the bed and reached for my walking boot. It was painful to walk in but better than crutches or the wheelchair. The first few strides sent pain radiating up my leg until it calmed down to a persistent ache. My stomach rumbled as I moved around the room.

  I made my way down the hall with an awkward step, clomp. Kaleb sat at the kitchen table with the farm report crackling over the radio. The coffee pot was half full and newspapers covered every inch of the table. I poured myself a cup and took a swig. My nose wrinkled in disgust when the thick, chunky liquid filled my mouth.

  “Yuck, what did you put in this?” I spit it out and dumped the rest of the pot down the drain. I proceeded to fill the pot with fresh coffee grounds and water.

  “I couldn’t remember how much to put in the machine.” He shrugged, sipped his coffee, and turned the page of the newspaper he was reading.

  “Where’s Delilah today?” I rummaged through the freezer and found some frozen toaster pastries and plunked them into the toaster oven.

  “She needed the day off.” He turned the paper again without even looking up at me.

  “Why?” A feeling of dread settled in my stomach. Something was off and I missed her already. When the pastries popped up, I gently tossed them from hand to hand before covering them with the little icing packages.

  “None of my business,” he grunted and pointed his finger at me. “But you should probably figure it out.” Kaleb grabbed his coffee and shoved his hat on his head.

  “Where are you going?” I clomped to the kitchen table and pulled a chair out with a loud squeak.

  “To the barn. Too many dumb questions in here this morning.” The door slammed behind him as he went to the barn.

  “I should figure it out,” I muttered to Zip.

  He cocked his head at me and whined. I broke off a corner of the pastry and tossed it to him. He caught it out of the air, swallowed it whole, and barked for some more. I hobbled to the pantry and poured out some of his dog food in a bowl for breakfast.

  “What does it mean?” I ran my fingers through my hair and scratched the back of my neck for a second before a light bulb went on. “Oh no,” I said.

  My stomach hit the floor and the sick feeling washed over me that wasn’t from eating too many pastries. If I felt this way, how must she have felt about today? Like a buffoon, I forgot all about it. I fumbled for my phone and turned on the screen. It was October 10th.

  “Who would know where she’s at in the middle of the week?”

  I needed to see her. I needed to hold her. Zip didn’t answer, not that I’d expected him to. He was busy crunching on the hard kibble. It was the middle of the week and all of Delilah’s friends were working. Where would she go?

  The only place a heartbroken girl would go would be her mother’s house. I dialed a number that I hadn’t dialed in over eleven years.

  It rang a couple of times before a scratchy, tired voice answered. “Sunny’s Flowers and Gifts, how can I help you?”

  “I would like to order flowers for delivery. What do you have?”

  “The usual. Roses, carnations, some sunflowers, there are a few calla lilies leftover from a wedding.”

  “How about two dozen roses. Make it with as many colors as you have.’

  “Alright, hang on.” He put me on hold. Soft jazz played through the receiver. I hope I was right as to where she was.

  “Ok, young man.” A scratchy frail voice answered. “What would you like the card to say?” I thought for a moment. Were there words to express my feelings of sorrow, regret, and inadequacy?

  “How about?

  ‘Yet in these thoughts myself almost despising.

  Haply I think on thee, and then my state,

  Like to the lark at break of day arising

  From sullen earth, sings hymns at heaven’s gate;

  For they sweet love remembered such wealth brings

  That then I scorn to change my state with kings.’”

  “Shakespeare?” The voice wheezed.

  “Yup, Sonnet 29.” A faint smile touched my lips as I remember how she loved to read Shakespeare to me on our picnics in high school.

  “You must be in the doghouse, son. Where would you like them sent?”

  “Yes, Sir, I am big time. To Delilah Allen. She should be at the Allen house on Fourth Street?” The line was quiet for a while. I could hear a pencil scratching.

  “It’s about time, Kade Kisment, that you sent that poor girl some flowers.” The voice wheezed, again.

  “Yes, Sir, it is long overdue.”

  Delilah

  MOM WAS IN THE KITCHEN getting some lemonade and cookies together. It didn’t matter how many years had gone by because the hurt was always there. Some days, it sat in the back corner of my mind like an unwanted plant that did not wither and die. Other days, it screamed at me. Those days were the hardest for me, especially when I was at the therapeutic riding stable. Tabitha was a few years younger than my child would have been. Today, he or she should have been celebrating a birthday with their friends from school. Kade and I would have gotten married and had a bunch more children. I rubbed my abdomen slowly, remembering the pain of that day. It was something I would never forget.

  “Here, you go, dear.” Mom set the tray of cookies next to me. She slid a lawn chair over and bit into a cookie. “This may make you feel better.” She waved a round golden disc covered in sugar. “It usually does.”

  I forced my lips upwards as I took the sugar cookie from her. “Thanks, this is good.” The sugary goodness of the cookie burst over my tongue. They were usually my favorite, but this year it was different, especially with seeing Kade every day. It brought back memories and feelings that I buried all those years ago. A tightness spread in my chest. I breathed through the pain, but a tear escaped and rolled down my cheek.

  “Everything will be alright.” Mom patted my knee, before donning some sunglasses and crossing her legs. “Kade will realize that he loves you, eventually. He’s not fast on the uptake...all those concussions probably don’t help, either.” She laughed.

  “My mood has nothing to do with Kade.” I scoffed an
d choked on my cookie. She pounded me on the back.

  “Sure, it doesn’t.” She rolled her eyes at me. “You have been moody and crabby since you started working there. And I know you aren’t just doing it for the money.”

  My mouth gaped at her. How could she possibly think that? Her index finger gently pushed upward on my chin, closing my mouth.

  “He’s the only one that has ever driven you crazy. Not even that Greg guy that you dated for a couple of weeks. He was boring.” She patted my knee again and leaned back in her chair. There was no arguing with her. She was almost always right, especially about Greg. I couldn’t believe I dated him for as long as I did. Sure, he was a doctor, but he was bland and needy. Not my style. I grabbed another cookie when the doorbell ring.

  “You going to get that?” She asked, propping her feet up on a stool.

  I dragged myself up off the chair as the doorbell rang again and shuffled to the front door to see a colorful array of roses blocking the view of the delivery boy. I swung open the door.

  “Are you Delilah Allen?” The teenage voice squeaked.

  “Yes, I am.”

  “Sign here, ma’am.” A receipt book materialized from the flowers. I signed my name with a flourish. He handed me the large bouquet and scurried away. I turned to the kitchen when I spotted the note. I ripped the envelop open and removed the card. Tears pricked at the corners of my eyes. My heart swelled in my chest as I read the familiar lines. How did he remember that was my favorite? In shock, I carried the flowers and the note out to the patio where Mom was relaxing in the sun.

  “What have you got?” Mom tilted her sunglasses up to take in the bouquet.

  “Kade sent me flowers.” I breathed. I couldn’t believe it.

  “It looks like two dozen roses to be more accurate.” She pulled off her shades and admired the different colors. “I take it he remembers too.” She raised an eyebrow at me as I shrugged.