All of My Soul

by Jenni Wilder

  My brother was the first to speak. “Sounds like you were on the right track. A tree branch or animal or something.”

  “One of the downsides to having a glass wall in your house,” Lincoln said and laughed a little, trying to lighten the mood, but I was still tense waiting for the detective to call back with more information.

  Uncomfortable silence filled the car again as the driver stopped in front of Frankie and Molly’s Back Bay brownstone house. I had mixed feelings. I didn’t know when I would see them again, but I was glad the night had ended early. If this thing with Lincoln’s house ended up being nothing, we could have some alone time and maybe salvage what was left of Valentine’s Day.

  The four of us got out of the car and said good-bye on the sidewalk. I hugged Frankie and Molly, promising to let them know what the detective said. I also made a point of apologizing for ruining their Valentine’s Day. I don’t think any of us expected the night to turn out this way.

  Lincoln cleared his throat once the two of us returned to the town car and told the driver to take us back to our hotel. “I should call Kennedy,” he said. “See if she and Brian can go over and board up the window… and the door.”

  “I’ll do it in case the detective calls you back. Plus she can’t get mad at me like she would you for ruining her Valentine’s Day.” I pulled out my phone and unlocked it. My background picture lit up the screen. It was a close-up of Lincoln and me snuggling in his bed together. Lincoln smiled and grabbed my hand to pull me closer to him. He kissed the top of my head as I rested against his shoulder and held out my phone.

  “Heeey.” Lincoln’s sister’s voice rang out on speakerphone. “Why are you calling me? Shouldn’t you be doing the nasty with my brother?”

  Thank God my brother and sister-in-law were no longer in the car.

  “Ah, no,” I replied. “We kind of have a problem.”

  “Oh my God, Jillian. Please do not tell me you or my brother have some sort of a sex injury. I don’t want to hear about that! Call your own damn sister. She’s a nurse.”

  “NO! Oh my God, Ken. No, it’s nothing like that!”

  Lincoln’s chest shook as he silently laughed.

  “Oh. Thank God.” Kennedy let out a relieved sigh and laughed. “Okay, so what’s the problem?”

  “Lincoln got a call that one of his windows in the back of his house broke. Not sure what caused it. The police are searching the house now, but they said there’s no sign of a break-in.”

  “Are they sure?” Kennedy’s voice had lost its air of playfulness.

  “We don’t know yet. The detective is going to call us back, hopefully soon.”

  “So you need us to go over there?”

  “Would you mind too much? I don’t want to ruin your Valentine’s Day.” Truly I felt bad about having to call her.

  “Don’t worry about it. You’d do the same for us.”

  “In a heartbeat,” I said immediately. I would do anything for her. She was a great friend and wonderful sister to Lincoln.

  The phone sitting on Lincoln’s leg lit up and rang. I quickly got off the line with Kennedy, telling her I would text her with more information. Lincoln answered his phone with the speaker on so I could hear.

  “Mr. Monaghan, this is Detective Murray again.”

  “Yes? What did you find, detective?” Lincoln asked.

  “There was no intruder. It doesn’t appear anyone has been in your house. Other than the window, nothing has been disturbed.”

  “So what broke the window?”

  The detective sighed loudly. “Can I text you a picture?”

  Lincoln agreed, and we waited in silence for the notification. A small bubble popped up at the top of the screen, and Lincoln tapped it, causing his text-messaging app to appear. I gasped in horror as a crumpled picture of me being pinned down on a dirty brown carpet while naked filled Lincoln’s screen. Someone had drawn two X’s over my eyes, and a bright line of red ink went through my neck.

  “Where did you get that?!” Lincoln exclaimed and quickly exited out of the app.

  “You’re familiar with that picture?” the detective asked.

  “Where did you get it?” Lincoln asked again, this time with more force.

  Detective Murray cleared his throat. “It was rubber-banded around a rock that was found in a pile of glass on your bedroom floor.”

  I whimpered and covered my mouth with my hand. I seriously thought we were done with this shit. I should have known Mackenzie would always find a way to use it to hurt me.

  Lincoln looked at me with concern etched in every detail of his face. He put his arm around my shoulders and pulled me tight against his chest.

  “Detective, my brother will call you shortly.”

  “Mr. Monaghan, do not impede my investigation. You need to tell me what you know.”

  Lincoln exhaled sharply. “The woman in the picture is my girlfriend, Jillian Thompson. The picture was taken during an assault on her five years ago. You’ll need to speak with Mackenzie McKay.”

  “Miss Illinois, Mackenzie McKay?” the detective asked in awe.

  “Former Miss Illinois,” Lincoln replied with a snarky tone. “My brother will be in touch.”

  Lincoln hung up the phone and pulled me into his lap. He cradled me as I hid my face in the side of his neck. I should have expected something like this. I had a gut feeling Mackenzie had been responsible for the vandalism on my car. Why had I assumed the restraining order would work? Clearly, she didn’t care. I had known a long time ago there was something not right with her. I shouldn’t have expected her to not use my picture to her advantage, especially after she sold it to the tabloid but didn’t get the exposure she wanted. But something didn’t make sense.

  “Why would she do this?” I asked quietly.

  “Because she’s an evil, hate-filled bitch.”

  “No, I know that. But it doesn’t make sense for her to do this. I mean, clearly we would link her with this picture. She would have to have known she’d be the prime suspect. It’s almost too obvious. You know what I mean? Why would she risk incriminating herself?”

  Lincoln grumbled. “I don’t know, but it has to be her.”

  “Anyone could have gotten that picture, but I would feel better if it was her.”

  “Why do you say that?”

  I sighed. “If it’s her, then we know she’s just being cruel. I don’t think she has the guts to actually physically hurt me. It’s more terrifying if it’s some random person doing this for God-knows-what reason.”

  Lincoln shook his head. “It makes more sense that it’s Mackenzie. Even if she is just being cruel and stupid.”

  “I hope it is. It’d be nice to put an end to this.”

  “Nice?” Lincoln’s voice was low and sharp. “Jillian, it would be nice if she disappeared from the surface of the earth. Preferably in a painful and torturous way.”

  Wow. I knew Lincoln hated Mackenzie, but I had never heard him speak so viciously about anyone. But we had arrived at our hotel, so I didn’t comment.

  “What time do we have to leave tomorrow?” I asked Lincoln as we rode the elevator to the top floor of our hotel.

  “Not till two o’clock.”

  I pushed all thoughts of what the police had found at Lincoln’s house out of my mind. Tonight was our night. I put a smirk on my face, and I swaggered across the elevator until I was standing right in front of him, leaning into him. “So we get to sleep in and snuggle in bed all morning?”

  “Would that make you happy?”

  I furrowed my brows at his tone. He didn’t sound pleased. “Of course it would, Lincoln.”

  He closed his eyes and sighed. “I’m sorry your Valentine’s Day got ruined. I know how excited you were for today.”

  “It’s not ruined. Do you think it’s ruined?”

  “You told Frankie, Molly, and Kennedy that you ruined their Valentine’s Day.”

  I nodded but was still confused. “I did. I feel bad for
interrupting their night.”

  “And your night wasn’t interrupted?”

  I sighed. “Yes, I wish the window thing wouldn’t have interrupted our night, but I still get to be with you tonight. So nothing is ruined. No matter what Mackenzie or whoever did this tries, they can’t ruin this. I’m spending Valentine’s Day with the man I am madly in love with. Nothing can change that.”

  “Princess…” he whispered.

  He tried to circle his arms around me, but the elevator dinged as we reached our floor. I smiled and bit my lip as I stepped away from him. Grabbing his hand, I walked backward out of the elevator, pulling him with me.

  His eyes burned into mine as he followed me down the short hallway. I stopped in front of our room and leaned back against the door. Lincoln closed the space between us quickly, taking the last three steps in almost a run. The door thumped as he placed his hands on either side of my head and loomed over me.

  “You’re perfect, you know that? I can’t get over it.” He was breathing deeply, and his desire for me was obvious.

  I shook my head. “You’re perfect,” I whispered back to him.

  He bent his elbows and lowered his face to mine. His kisses started off softly and slowly but quickly grew more intense.

  “Lincoln,” I whimpered as he caged me against the door. His body felt so good against mine. I loved being this close to him.

  I heard the beep of our door lock as Lincoln pulled away from me. “Let’s go inside. I think you’ll like your next surprise.”

  “There’s more?” I asked as he opened the door and nodded.

  The lights in our room had been dimmed, and there was a soft glow coming from the large bathroom. Our bed had been covered in red rose petals; my roses from this morning sat in a glass vase on the nightstand next to my side of the bed. I kicked off my boots before peeking inside the bathroom. The Jacuzzi tub had been filled with bubbly water, and small tea-light candles lined the edge. A platter of strawberries sat next to a silver bucket of ice that held a green bottle of champagne.

  I sensed Lincoln standing directly behind me in the doorway of the bathroom so I turned and hugged him around the waist, burying my face in his coat.

  His arms came around me and held me tightly against him.

  “Do you like it?” he asked.

  “How did you do this?” This wasn’t what the room had looked like when I left.

  “I have my ways.” I could hear the smile in his voice. “Do you want to take a bath, Princess?”

  “Mm. That sounds wonderful.” Warm water, relaxing bubbles, and naked Lincoln? Did he really need to ask?

  Lincoln unbuttoned his coat, then mine, and threw them onto a chair in the corner of the bathroom. He returned to me, cupped my face in his hands, and kissed me passionately. My hands wandered around to his back, and I began pulling at his dress shirt, untucking it from his jeans. He broke our kiss and stepped back from me so he could unwrap my scarf from around my neck. His eyes never left mine until he slowly lifted my sweater up over my head, revealing my camisole underneath.

  “You have way too many layers. In the future, fewer layers, more skin,” he said as he pulled my tank top over my head.

  Knowing my skin was marred and imperfect, I couldn’t help but feel overwhelmed and utterly grateful that Lincoln could say he wanted more of it. I leaned back against the sink vanity and arched my back so my chest rose up.

  “More skin? Like this?” I asked as I skimmed my fingertips of one hand down the cleavage created by my new bra. It was difficult to be naked in front of him, despite his reassurance this morning, but I had bought this bra specifically for tonight. It was hot pink with black lace on the cups. It lifted me up and created cleavage I never had before. I felt like a model wearing it, even if I didn’t necessarily look like one.

  Lincoln took a step back and his eyes locked on to my chest. “Holy shit. Is that new?”

  I bit my lip and nodded. “And the panties match.”

  His dark brown eyes flashed to mine. They were full of desire. “Show me,” he ordered.

  I smiled widely. He liked it. I could see how much he liked it through his jeans.

  I pushed him back a little more and tried to look sexy as I walked to the chair where he had placed our coats. Lincoln watched me like a predator as I retrieved my phone from my coat pocket and brought up my music app. I selected a song with a deep bass beat and began swaying my hips and rolling my shoulders as Eve’s “Let Me Blow Your Mind” featuring Gwen Stefani filled the room. It was an older song, but it was perfect for what I wanted to do.

  With an uncharacteristic burst of confidence, I hooked my thumbs inside my waistband and slowly unbuttoned my pants and lowered the zipper. I quickly spun around so my back was to Lincoln as the song took over my movements. I felt sexy and confident as I flipped my long hair over one shoulder and looked back at my man.

  Lincoln clenched and unclenched his fists as he watched me dance to the music. He was totally mesmerized, and it made me feel so desirable. He never looked at me as if my scars were invisible. Rather, he looked at me as if my scars were just another piece of me that made me even more beautiful to him. He made me feel completely accepted and loved.

  Sliding my fingers around to the waistband by my hips, I slowly pulled down on one side of my skinny jeans, revealing the tiny string of pink and black lace.

  I turned back around to face him and pulled the other side of my jeans down over my hip and let them fall down to my ankles. I somehow managed to work my feet out of my socks and jeans without falling over or looking too ridiculous.

  Lincoln licked his lips as I moved my hands over my body and sauntered toward my man who was wearing too many layers himself.

  “More skin,” I told him as I reached for the buttons on his shirt. He placed his hands on my hips as I stood in front of him in just my bra and panties, swaying to the beat of the music. I stripped off his shirt, adding it to the growing pile of clothing on the floor, and immediately began unbuckling his belt. I pulled on it as I stepped back from him and worked it free of his pants, loop by loop. As soon as his belt was free, he rid himself of his pants and boxers, and I stopped dancing as I took in the sight of him. I wanted to memorize every inch of his skin. Every bump of his muscles. He was so handsome, and he was all mine.

  He took a step toward me, and I snapped out of my daze. I smiled at him as I started moving my hips to the beat again.

  “Jillian, you’re killing me. Come here.”

  I bit my lip and swayed my head back and forth. I had plans and a surprise of my own for him, but that was for later.

  I held out my hand, and when he placed his in mine, I pulled him toward the chair in the corner. I threw our coats on the floor and pushed him down into the cushy chair. His erection stood straight up, and all I wanted to do was crawl on top and impale myself on him, but I restrained myself.

  I placed my hands on the arms of the chair and leaned over him. Softly I brushed my lips over his, teasing him until he reacted. He sat up slightly so he could kiss me deeply. When I returned his intensity, I heard him groan, and his hands brushed against the skin at my ribs before moving higher to my breasts. He ran his hands over my bra and tried to circle his thumbs around my nipples, but I pulled away from him. I was already too worked up.

  Leaning over him again, I ran my hands down his chest and across his abdomen. I took his hard member gently in my hand. Lincoln closed his eyes and dropped his head back as I moved my hand up and down slowly.

  I leaned closer and moved my mouth to his ear. I licked the outer shell slowly before whispering, “I’m gonna blow your mind…”

  Lincoln’s shivered and breathed deeply several times. I dropped to my knees between his legs and ran my hand up his thigh. He opened his eyes slightly, and I could see him watching me as I lowered my mouth to his thick shaft.

  “Happy Valentine’s Day, baby. Thank you for such an awesome day,” I told him before I took him in my mouth.

 
He groaned loudly as I began to slowly bob my head up and down. His leg muscles quivered, and his pelvis moved with each gyration of my head. I tried to take him as deep as I could, knowing that’s how he liked it.

  I looked up at him through hooded eyes as I increased my speed and pressure, and our eyes met. The combination of love and lust written on his face turned me on so much. I loved how I could pleasure him. If someone had told me two months ago I’d be giving my boyfriend a blowjob in a hotel in Boston after dancing a strip tease, I would have said they were insane. But there was nowhere I’d rather be right now.

  Lincoln groaned loudly as he moved his right hand to the back of my head and gently gripped my hair at the top. He closed his eyes again, and in a matter of moments I could tell he was close to the edge. Then he did something he’d never done before.

  Moving his left hand to join his other, he weaved his fingers through my hair and began dominating the speed and direction of my head, totally taking control. He cried out as he moved me quickly up and down his shaft a few more times before pushing me off him. He let go of me as he erupted, directing his release onto my cleavage with a loud groan.

  “Wow,” I said as I sat back on my heels, slightly shocked as Lincoln took several deep, calming breaths. Seeing the result of Lincoln’s loss of control on my chest, I realized I kind of liked it. It was slightly awkward to have him control my head like that, but I like that he was so lost in his pleasure he couldn’t restrain himself.

  Removing my bra and panties, I walked to the sink and cleaned my chest off before returning to Lincoln. He was still recovering as he sat slumped in the chair with his head back and his eyes closed.

  I gently crawled into his lap and rested my head against his shoulder.

  “I’m sorry,” he said as his arms wrapped around me to hold me, and he kissed my forehead.

  My brows furrowed. “For what?”

  “I didn’t mean to grab your head like that. That couldn’t have been comfortable for you.”

  I relaxed against him and smiled as I lightly traced my fingertips over his chest. “It’s okay, Lincoln. It made me feel…” I paused as I tried to explain my feelings. “Sexy maybe? Knowing you couldn’t control yourself? I liked it.”