All of My Soul

by Jenni Wilder

  Relief washed through me. I had thought I was in trouble. “Oh, I’m not really interested in getting my Ph.D. right now. I want to get some lab experience.”

  He crossed his arms over his chest. “Did you apply at BioTech Labs?”

  I nodded. “Yes, but I haven’t heard anything.”

  “VonDan Research?”

  I shook my head. “I don’t want to leave Chicago.”

  He sucked a breath in through his teeth. “You’re really limiting your choices then, Jillian.”

  “I know. But it’s what I want.”

  “All right. I can respect that. Well, I know the human resources manager at BioTech. Let me make some calls. I think your research would really be welcome there.”

  I grinned widely. “Oh, thank you. That would mean a lot to me.”

  “Don’t overlook getting your Ph.D. though, Jillian. You could be an asset here.”

  I blushed at his praise and nodded. “I’ll keep it in mind.”

  “All right.” He offered his hand to me. “I’ll be in touch.”

  Shaking his hand, I smiled. “Thank you, again.”

  I grabbed my laptop and sprinted to the back of the auditorium, reminding myself that Lincoln was injured and not to jump into his arms. I slowed as I approached him and gently looped my arms up to hug him. He held me as tight as possible with one arm before pulling back to kiss me.

  “I’m so proud of you, baby,” he told me with a gleaming smile.

  “Thank you, Lincoln. That means so much to me. Thank you for coming.”

  “Are you ready to party?”

  “Hell yeah!” I exclaimed and pumped my fist in the air with excitement.

  ~~~~~~~~

  Lincoln held a bottle of beer in his casted hand high above his head as I leaned into his good side. “To Jillian!” he shouted as he wrapped his other arm around my waist and held me close to him. He swayed slightly on his feet but grinned down at me with a big goofy smile.

  Everyone around us cheered and held up their drinks in return. This was the most people I had ever seen in Lincoln’s house. The kitchen and living room were comfortably full, while a few groups of people mingled on the deck. Lincoln had invited our siblings, of course, and Kennedy and Brian had invited Brian’s sister and her husband, the owner of Patrick’s. Several of Lincoln’s teammates were here, including Deacon and Matt. Matt brought his new girlfriend, but Deacon was by himself and paying a hell of a lot of attention to my sister. I still hadn’t figured out what was going on between the two of them.

  “Hey!” Lincoln hollered to get everyone’s attention. “To Jillian! The sexiest, smartest, funniest, sexiest, kindest, sexiest scientist ever!” He took a big swallow of his beer as our friends laughed at his terrible toast. Blushing, I turned into his chest to hide my embarrassment and covered my face with my hand. The next thing I knew, Lincoln’s good hand smacked me hard on my ass.

  “Ow!” I cried and stumbled against him. We both were on the fast track to being drunk, but we were celebrating and trying to forget all the shit in our lives at that moment.

  Lincoln’s big hand covered my one butt cheek, and he massaged it through my jeans. “Did I mention sexiest?”

  “Yes. You did, you crazy man.” The alcohol in my system made it really difficult to remember that I shouldn’t be rubbing myself against him.

  Technically, his rib and lung were still healing, and he was supposed to be taking it easy for at least another month, but when he put his hands on me, especially when I had this much to drink, it was easy to forget. At least until I moved my hand to his bad side and tried to pull him closer to me. As soon as I touched the bruises by his ribs, he knocked my hand away and abruptly stepped back to put a little distance between us.

  I gasped and covered my mouth with my hand. “Oh my God, baby. Are you okay? I’m so sorry!”

  He let out a sharp breath. “It’s fine. It’s fine. It didn’t hurt that much.”

  I pouted up at him and felt like crying. Well, that was probably the alcohol talking, but still. I had hurt my man. I felt terrible.

  “Hey. Don’t frown. It’s fine, Princess.” He leaned down and kissed me, sucking my pouty bottom lip into his mouth. My hands immediately went to his hair, weaving my fingers through it, and I melted into him. He groaned at my intensity and grabbed my ass again with his good hand, squeezing hard.

  Jesus, that feels good.

  “Lincoln! You don’t need to fucking molest her in the middle of the goddamn kitchen!”

  I smiled against Lincoln’s lips as Kennedy protested from the other side of the kitchen. Lincoln broke our kiss and turned his head to glare at his sister, but didn’t let go of my ass.

  “It’s my goddamn kitchen. I’ll molest my girlfriend wherever I like.”

  I giggled, and he turned to look at me.

  “Only because you’re so good at it,” I told him quietly so only he would hear.

  He growled softly and kissed me again. The hand on my ass moved farther south. His fingers were incredibly close to being in an extremely inappropriate place since we weren’t alone.

  I heard Kennedy make a fake retching noise, and I knew I had to stop Lincoln soon, but it made me happy that he wasn’t ashamed to show affection toward me in public.

  “JILLIAN! WE NEED SHOTS!” Emily screeched from the other side of the living room.

  I pulled away from Lincoln and steadied myself against the counter. Lincoln looked at me with a smug grin but stepped back and took a long pull from his beer bottle.

  “What are we drinking, Em?” Rebecca asked as she hooked her arm over Emily’s shoulders and approached the kitchen’s breakfast bar.

  Emily began setting up shot glasses, and I made my way around the island to the other side to see what she was doing.

  “You can have whatever you want, Bec, but Jillian is doing a Tropical Vacation.”

  I clapped my hands and did a little happy dance. “Yay! That sounds amazing! What is it?”

  Kennedy joined us as Deacon and Lincoln watched from the other side of the island. Carter stood nearby, watching but not participating.

  “This is a tradition with my friends from college. At every graduation party, the guest of honor has to do a Tropical Vacation.” She scrunched up her nose and looked like she was thinking hard. “You know, I can’t even remember how we started doing this in the first place.”

  “Imagine that,” Carter mumbled, but everyone ignored him. If he was dead set on being a stick-in-the-mud then I wasn’t going to let him ruin my night.

  “So anyway,” Emily continued. “It’s a good-luck thing. We wish you so much success in your future that you are able to take many tropical vacations.”

  “Well, shit,” Rebecca said. “She’s got Lincoln to take her to exotic destinations. I should be the one wishing for a vacation.”

  “I’ll take you anywhere you want to go, sweet cheeks,” Deacon said to my sister, surprising me. “You just name the time and place.”

  Rebecca rolled her eyes. “Yeah, right,” she said in a huff, but she didn’t elaborate, and Deacon didn’t push it.

  After a second of awkwardness, Kennedy broke the silence that had fallen over our little group. “So what’s in it, Emily?”

  Emily grabbed for several bottles and unscrewed the cap of one of them. “It’s a shot of Parrot Bay coconut rum,” she said as she filled the first shot glass to the top with a creamy white liquid. “A shot of peach UV vodka.” She filled the second glass with an orange liquid and reached for another bottle. “A shot of Jamaican rum.” She poured a clear liquid into the third glass. “And a shot of curaçao.” The final glass was filled with blue liquor. “Get it?” she asked as she set down the last bottle. “They’re all tropical! And it looks so pretty!”

  My eyes went wide. “I have to drink all four of them?”

  “Yeah!” Emily said with excitement at the same time Carter and Lincoln said “No.”

  I looked at Lincoln with confusion. He didn’
t usually tell me I couldn’t do something. He wasn’t controlling like that.

  He smiled at me. “You don’t have to drink anything you’re not comfortable with.”

  I smile back at him and turned to Carter, wondering what his objection was. It’s not like we had asked him to drink the shots.

  “Four shots seems a little excessive, don’t you think?”

  Emily huffed. “Have you ever even done one shot?”

  Carter looked away and shifted his feet.

  “That’s what I thought,” she said to him and turned back to me. “You don’t have to drink them all, but I would start with the rum if I were you.”

  I looked up at Lincoln again, and he just smiled and shrugged his shoulders.

  “I’ll tell you what, Carter. Why don’t you help me? I’ll do three of them if you drink one of them. I’ll even give you the easiest one. Do you like coconut?”

  He didn’t look happy. “Three shots is still excessive, Jillian.”

  Emily rolled her eyes. “Fine. I’ll do one too.”

  “And I’ll take the vodka,” Lincoln said.

  “You like peach?” I asked as I handed him the vodka shot.

  “I do,” he answered with a wink. “It tastes like you.”

  Kennedy made her retching noise again causing the rest of us to laugh.

  “All right, Carter? One shot apiece. Is that acceptable?” Emily asked.

  Carter shifted his feet again but finally broke. “Fine. But if I’m going to do this, I get that blue one.”

  I laughed and handed it to him.

  “All right!” Emily exclaimed and grabbed the final glass. “Here we go! May there be many tropical vacations in your future, Jillian! Cheers!”

  Glasses clinked, and I tipped my head back and let the liquid pour down my throat. It burned and didn’t remind me of anything tropical, but I swallowed and managed not to cough too badly. For as much shit as Emily had given Carter, I didn’t want to admit that that had been my first shot ever as well.

  Emily and Lincoln slammed their glasses down on the counter, and we all turned to see how Carter had handled his shot. I almost burst out laughing at the sight of him. He was holding the glass delicately as if it were a cup of hot tea, and he was taking dainty little sips.

  “Oh my God! That is not how you do a shot, Carter!” Emily marched up to Carter and took the glass from his hand. “This is how you do a shot.” She leaned forward, made a seal around the rim of the glass with her mouth and tipped her head back while keeping her arms at her side. The glass balanced precariously on her lips as she sucked down the liquid.

  Behind me, Deacon let out a lustful groan. I could understand what had caused that reaction in him. Emily was a beautiful girl, and right now with her head tipped back, you could see the muscles in her throat move as she swallowed the alcohol. Her low-cut shirt revealed more cleavage than I would be comfortable with, and her soft blond hair spilled down her back. She looked hot, and Deacon wasn’t the only male who noticed. Carter stood in front of her with his mouth dropped open slightly and his eyes full of lust. It was obvious he was trying hard not to stare at her chest but was failing miserably.

  Emily tipped her head forward and let the glass fall into her hand before raising her arms up over her head and letting out a happy cheer. She was all smiles—so proud of herself for stealing Carter’s shot.

  She stood in front of him now, licking her lips, silently goading him to say something.

  “Ken,” Carter said with an eerie calmness. “Pour another.”

  His sister bounced with excitement and quickly set up another round of drinks. Guess I was doing another shot after all.

  “You going to drink it like a man this time?” Emily asked Carter. I laughed in disbelief that she was not only teasing him like this, but that he seemed to like it! She was slowly getting him to participate. Maybe there was hope for him yet!

  Carter cocked an eyebrow. “Bring. It. On.”

  Emily grinned from ear to ear and grabbed the now-full shot glass off the counter. She carefully held it up for him, but when he reached for it, she playfully pulled it away.

  He grabbed for it again, and she took a step back and brought the drink up to her lips. Carter’s eyebrows flew up with astonishment.

  Emily giggled, and we all gasped as she suddenly wedged the shot glass into her cleavage, balancing it precariously between her two breasts. I couldn’t believe she had done that. She wasn’t usually so… risqué.

  “Oh my God,” Rebecca uttered with a mix of shock and amusement as Carter stared transfixed at Emily’s chest.

  Silence fell over those of us in the kitchen as we waited to see what Carter would do next. My gaze bounced back and forth between the two of them. Emily crossed her arms under her breasts, enhancing the temptation in front of Carter. He took a step forward and gently grabbed her elbow. His breathing had sped up, and there was no doubt from the heat in his eyes that he was turned on, but instead of falling to temptation, he abruptly let go of her and stepped back.

  “I—I can’t,” he stammered, clearly embarrassed. “I’m sorry.”

  Emily deflated as Carter turned around and walked away from her. He crossed the living room and out onto Lincoln’s deck before he was swallowed up by the darkness.

  I cringed as Emily watched him disappear out of sight. The silence turned to awkwardness, as those of us left in the kitchen didn’t know what to say.

  Deacon broke the shocked silence that had fallen over us. “Well, I’ll do it!” he said and moved toward Emily but she was faster than him. She retrieved the drink from between her breasts and pushed Deacon away from her as he tried to grab her. She knocked back the shot, slammed the glass down, and walked away in the opposite direction Carter had gone.

  The next thing I knew, Deacon was yelling in protest as Rebecca dumped her beer over his head.

  “That’s my sister, you dumb fuck!”

  Deacon wiped the beer out of his eyes in time to see Rebecca hurrying after Emily.

  “Dude.” Lincoln shook his head at his friend.

  “What? What’d I do?” Deacon asked as droplets of beer rolled down his face.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Eventually Kennedy went after Carter, but Lincoln and I decided to stay out of whatever was going on with our siblings and Deacon. My man and I mingled around the room, jumping from group to group and joining in on conversations. It was nice to talk with some of Lincoln’s teammates, but I was pretty sure their dates were all looking at me with curiosity. Some of them had been in the suite when I collapsed, and I’m sure most of them had seen the gossip about me being in therapy, so I think they weren’t sure what to think of me. But I didn’t want to worry about that tonight.

  By the time Emily, Rebecca, Carter, and Kennedy rejoined the party, I was feeling wonderful courtesy of the peach sunrises Brian’s brother-in-law had made for me, and I was in no mood for our siblings’ drama.

  I had been chatting with Matt’s new girlfriend, Cece, who I liked much better than his ex, when Pitbull’s “Timber” featuring Kesha filled the room. I screamed and threw my arms up, my hips already moving to the beat of the song.

  “I love this song!” I announced to the room.

  “Me too!” Cece exclaimed, grabbing my arm as we started an impromptu dance party in the middle of the living room. Her hips popped left and right as she shook her ass to the beat. Clearly, she either had some dance training or she went clubbing a lot. Either way, she was laughing and singing along while she grabbed my hips, encouraging me to let loose. Raising my arms over my head, I let the music take me, not caring who was watching.

  Normally, there would have been no way I would have ever danced like that in the middle of a crowd of people, but the large amount of alcohol and the cheers from whoever was watching us made me forget my inhibitions. Plus, I knew I was surrounded by people who loved me and wanted me to have fun.

  Eventually the song ended and another one began, but Cece and
I kept dancing. Whatever my sisters’ problems were, they seemed to have forgotten about them as they joined us, and we danced late into the night.

  I lost track of how many songs I danced to before I finally collapsed on Lincoln’s couch, slightly sweaty and breathing hard. Our dancefest had burned off some of the alcohol in my system, and I was grateful for that. I didn’t want to end up with my head in the toilet, especially since it seemed like Lincoln might.

  I knew he had been watching me dance for a long time, but now when I went to the kitchen to pour myself a big glass of water I didn’t see him anywhere. I quickly filled my glass and wandered downstairs.

  I found him leaning on a pool stick, watching Carter, Brian, and Deacon play pool in his man cave, looking like he was about to pass out. But when he noticed me approaching, his face broke out in a wide grin.

  “There’s my sexy girl.” His words were slurred, making me even more relieved that I had quit drinking a while ago.

  The other three guys greeted me before Lincoln surprised me by pinning me against the pool table with his body. He was uncoordinated and wobbly, but his hands began to grope at me in a way that was definitely not appropriate given his injuries and the fact that we weren’t alone.

  “Hey! Come on, man!” Brian complained, but Lincoln didn’t stop. He gyrated his hips against mine and tried to kiss me.

  “Lincoln, behave.” I tipped my head away from him so his lips couldn’t reach mine and pulled his hand away from my breast as I scolded him.

  His eyes locked on mine as his desire for me burned through his drunken daze. “You can’t dance like that and then tell me to behave.”

  Deacon laughed and threw his pool stick down on the table, knocking the balls out of position. “That’s why we brought him down here to begin with. We thought he was going to attack you on the dance floor. Kennedy told us to distract him, so we thought playing pool would help, but I think the game’s over now.”

  Carter grumbled as the three of them abandoned their game and headed toward the stairs.

  I batted Lincoln’s hand away again and tried to pull away from him as he kissed my neck. “No. Don’t leave!” I didn’t want to ruin their game, plus with his injuries, Lincoln shouldn’t have been trying to get physical.