Secret Admirer

by Cynthia Eden

  Some of the tension slipped from her shoulders. She tipped her head back so that she could stare up at him. Alice was close to five-foot-eight, but he skirted six-foot-three. And she was too damn thin. Every time he came to the cabin, he found himself picking up pastries for her. Today, he’d brought three cupcakes. She’d given him a smile as a thank you.

  Smile number three.

  “Everyone else always pries.” Her lashes lowered to shield her gaze. “I don’t look…familiar to you?”

  “Um, I’ve seen you off and on for the last two months. You definitely look familiar.”

  She gave a short, negative shake of her head. “That’s not what I mean.”

  He waited. Come on, Alice. Make this important move. Do it. Trust me.

  Even though he was lying to her. Using her.

  She nodded, then her lashes lifted. “Do you remember the Secret Admirer?”

  He rubbed a hand over his jaw. “Wasn’t that the guy from Savannah? The one who killed those women?”

  A flinch had her whole body jerking. “Yes.”

  Hard to forget a freak show like that guy. “What about him?”

  Her spine straightened. Her chin lifted. “He was my fiancé.”

  Zander let surprise cover his face.

  “The woman in the white wedding dress? The woman who was splashed all across the news and in all the papers? The fool who didn’t know her fiancé was a killer?” A smile covered her lips—smile four—only this smile wasn’t like the others. This smile was almost painful to see. “That woman was me.”

  He gave a low whistle. “So when you say you had a bad experience…”

  “I mean it.” Her smile was gone. “You don’t want to date me. You don’t want my baggage. You don’t want to wake up one day and find reporters camped out on your doorstep because someone in the area realized who I was and tipped them off.”

  Shit. Alice was trying to protect him?

  “You are handsome. And you’re kind. And you’ve been an absolute lifesaver to me.” Her hand gestured vaguely toward the small cabin that waited behind her. “I swear, every single day, something new is falling apart in this place.”

  Yes, it was. Because of the FBI.

  “If it wasn’t for you, I wouldn’t have running water, a front door that opened, a refrigerator that worked, electricity that—”

  “It’s just my job,” Zander cut in. The FBI had been sabotaging things left and right, so that she’d have to call Zander. And right then, he felt like a total jerk.

  Her gaze softened on him. “You’re a nice man.”

  The hell he was. He was ruthless. He was determined. He was a bit of an adrenaline junkie. But no matter what else might be said about him, Zander always got the job done. Zander wasn’t the type to hesitate, hell, just ask any of his old Ranger buddies. He was many things, but not nice. No one had ever called him nice. That title was damn insulting.

  “You don’t deserve to be dragged down into my trouble.” She turned away.

  His hand flew out. This time, his fingers reached for her. He caught her wrist, and his hand encircled it. Zander pulled her back toward him, and their bodies almost brushed.

  Her gaze flew up to his. “What are you doing?”

  He shouldn’t have touched her. And he absolutely shouldn’t be running his thumb along her inner wrist in a soft, sensual caress. Swallowing, Zander let her go as he stepped back. “I like trouble.” That was one of the most truthful things he’d ever said to her.

  Her lips parted. “You…do?”

  “And you’re too young to lock yourself away because you had the misfortune to be taken in by some twisted freak.”

  Her arms wrapped around her stomach.

  “I’m not a killer. Hell, if you want them, I can give you references. Can even let you talk to my fourth grade teacher. She’ll vouch for me.” He paused, then added, “You can trust me.” Shit, he almost choked on those words.

  “Trust isn’t exactly easy for me.”

  Alice loved her understatements. It was kind of cute.

  “One dinner,” Zander offered. “That’s what I’m asking for. Let me show you that it’s okay to live your life again.”

  “H-how do you know I haven’t been living?”

  Hell—fix that blunder. “When I come out here, you never have friends or family over. You don’t even have a dog. You’re a beautiful woman, and you’re hiding yourself in the mountains. You’re hiding from the world. Don’t have to be a shrink to realize that.” He waited a beat and decided to push more, using info that one of the FBI shrinks had passed along to him. “You’re letting him win, Alice. Don’t you see that? If you give up your life, isn’t it like he killed you, too?”

  She held his stare.

  Had he pushed too far? Too fast? Dammit. What should he do next? How to play this, how to—

  “Hugh didn’t take my life. But sometimes, it sure feels like he did.” She exhaled. “Okay, fine, if my scary past didn’t run you off…if you really think you want to date me—I mean, have dinner—then…let’s do it.”

  Hell, yes.

  “But…can we have dinner here instead of going out? I’m a really good cook. And I—I don’t exactly like being in crowds.”

  Probably because she was afraid someone would recognize her.

  “It’s one of the reasons I work from home,” she murmured. “I like…quiet. Space.”

  He knew she worked as a freelance designer. She spent her time creating ad pieces for corporations. And staying out of the limelight.

  “I stocked up at the grocery store yesterday,” Alice continued. “So I’ve got plenty of food.”

  Right. She’d been on the trip to the store when her sprinkler had been sabotaged.

  “I have steaks.” Her words came quickly. “And salad.”

  He gave her his winning smile. “I have wine.”

  She didn’t smile back, but her eyes seemed to gleam a little more. “Then how about you come back tonight at seven?”

  “It’s a date.” He gave her a little bow, and then he headed for his truck. Zander waited until he was a good distance away from her cabin, then he called his partner. The line rang once, twice—

  “Hey, Z. Tell me you made some progress with the target.”

  Randall Cane’s voice filled the interior of the truck as it carried through the Bluetooth system. “I made progress.” So why was his gut knotted? “We’re having dinner in her cabin tonight.”

  “Hell, yes. Finally. If anyone could get that woman to lower her guard, I knew it would be you!” Satisfaction deepened Randall’s voice.

  “It’s just dinner,” Zander muttered. “Not like she’s going to spill every secret she has to me.”

  “She’d sure as hell better. That’s the point of this whole operation. For you to build trust with the target. For her to feel as if she can confide in you. For you to figure out if Alice May is a cold-blooded killer, just like her former lover.”

  His hands tightened on the wheel, an instinctive reaction. “She doesn’t seem the type.”

  “Yeah, well, don’t forget, we found those photos of the vics in her apartment.”

  They had. Black and white photos of the victims had been hidden beneath a floorboard in Alice’s closet. She’d claimed never to have seen those photos before. Told authorities that Hugh must have kept them hidden there without her knowledge.

  Her fingerprints hadn’t been on them. There had been no physical evidence to tie Alice to the murders. There had just been unanswered questions. A whole lot of them…

  Why were the photos in her closet?

  Why was Alice allowed to live—when she looked exactly like the Secret Admirer’s other victims?

  Why had the killings all started after Hugh Collins met Alice May?

  And even though Hugh Collins was in a cemetery, the Secret Admirer had claimed a new victim two months ago. Julianna Stiles. A woman who appeared eerily similar in appearance to Alice…a woman who’d been found w
ith a knife stabbed in her heart, and rose petals sprinkled around her body. The Secret Admirer’s MO. But the Press hadn’t gotten wind of the story, not yet. The FBI was trying to keep the murder under wraps. Trying to see if Alice could be tied to that crime…

  Trying to see…if Alice had been her lover’s partner all along.

  Sure, the FBI could be dealing with a copycat. That was one option, but the FBI brass had long suspected that Hugh Collins hadn’t worked alone when he’d committed his crimes. And the higher-ups at the Bureau suspected his secret partner was none other than the lovely Alice May.

  “If she isn’t Julianna’s killer,” Randall continued, “then she has to know who the fuck is. No one was closer to Hugh than she was. The killer’s identity is in her head, even if she doesn’t realize it.”

  “I’ll let you know what I find out. I’m heading back to her place at seven.”

  Silence. Randall wasn’t often the silent type. When he went quiet, it meant he was worried.

  “You got something you want to add?” Zander pressed.

  “Don’t get fooled by a pretty face.” Randall’s voice had turned brisk. “You know pretty faces can hide sadistic killers. You’re the one playing her, not the other way around. Don’t forget that shit.”

  Zander didn’t intend to let himself get played.

  “She’s a job,” Randall continued flatly. “Nothing more. Bust her—or find out who the hell was working with her lover. Do whatever it takes, but get the job done.”

  “I always do.”

  For some reason though, he had a quick flash of Alice as she stood, wiping her dirt-covered fingers on her jeans. She’d looked so damn innocent.

  Was she a world-class liar?

  Or one of the Secret Admirer’s victims?

  He was going to find out the truth about Alice. Even if he had to be a lying bastard in order to uncover her secrets.

  Chapter Two

  “I brought dessert.” Zander flashed a wide smile as he stood at the threshold of Alice’s cabin. The smile revealed the two slashes in his cheeks. Not dimples. They were too strong, too hard, too masculine to be dimples.

  Her gaze fell to his hands, and she saw that he clasped a bottle of wine in his right hand and an open box of cupcakes in his left. Two cupcakes. Both with chocolate icing.

  “I know chocolate is your favorite.”

  It was. Chocolate had always been her guilty pleasure.

  “Thank you.” She took the cupcakes and gave a quick nod. Her fingers shook a bit, and Alice hoped he didn’t notice. She’d been counting down the minutes to his arrival—both in anticipation and in dread.

  She wasn’t exactly a pro when it came to dating. In fact, she hadn’t dated anyone in almost a year. Tomorrow will be a year. The dark and twisted anniversary.

  Alice eased out a slow breath. “Come inside.” She would not let him see how hard this was for her. She liked Zander, dammit. He’d been nothing but helpful. He was sexy as all hell with his dark, slightly curly hair, and his warm, brown eyes. The man had saved her time and time again when her cabin decided to fall apart. The guy was a Good Samaritan.

  But then, she’d thought Hugh was good, too.

  “I’ll put these in the kitchen.” She turned away from him. “Give me just a moment.” She hurried into the kitchen, trying to get her nerves under control. It was just dinner, for goodness sake. Nothing more.

  His footsteps followed her. As quickly as she could, Alice put the cupcakes on the counter. She turned and found Zander standing far too close to her. He leaned toward her, reached out—and put the wine on the counter next to the cupcakes.

  Why was it so hard to breathe?

  “You’re scared.” A furrow appeared between his brows. “Did I do something wrong?”

  No, he’d done everything right. Including not freaking out when she told him about her ex. “I’m, um, a little rusty at dating.”

  Those slashes appeared again in his cheeks, and his eyes twinkled. “Oh, really?”

  “There’s…a lot of pressure with dating.” She probably sounded like a lunatic. “You know, wondering if you’ll connect. Wondering when you’ll have the first kiss. Wondering if it will feel right or if it will just be some huge mistake.”

  His head cocked. “You should stop worrying.”

  Easier said than done.

  “If you’re stressing over it, then how about we just get the first kiss out of the way?”

  Wait—had he just said—

  His hand lifted and curled under her chin. “This way, the pressure will be off.”

  She hadn’t kissed anyone, not since—

  “Your mouth is gorgeous, Alice.” But he didn’t lower his head. He stared into her eyes, and the tension stretched between them. “May I kiss you?”

  Her tongue swiped over her lower lip. He was right. They should get this done. Eliminate the pressure. Sounded like a fabulous idea to her. “Y-yes.”

  His head lowered. He wasn’t rushing. Zander took his time, and her whole body stiffened. Not in dread. In anticipation. And when his lips finally met hers, the kiss was tender. Careful. A gentle exploration. There was no awkward bumping. No too-rough press of his mouth. He kissed her with sensual skill, and her lips parted for him even as her hands rose to curl around his broad shoulders. Then his tongue slid into her mouth. And the kiss became a little harder. A little more intense. No, a lot more intense because desire burned through her, heating her blood with a sudden, sharp intensity.

  Alice found herself leaning toward him. Opening her mouth more. Wanting more. A low moan built in her throat and—

  Zander pulled back. His gaze seemed to blaze. “Sure didn’t feel awkward to me.” A pause. “And, sweetheart, rusty is not a word I’d associate with you.”

  She was breathing too hard. And her fingers were trembling, but not because of fear or nerves, not any longer. Desire beat in her blood. Need had her aching. She wanted to close the distance between them. To kiss him again.

  To do one hell of a lot more than just kiss.

  “Glad we got that out of the way,” Zander murmured, and a twinkle came into his eyes. “And I’ve got to say, you taste sweeter than cupcakes.”

  Heat stung her cheeks. She opened her mouth to reply, but her phone rang. Frowning, she glanced toward the counter. Only a few people had her number. Very, very few. The phone vibrated and rang again.

  “Go ahead,” Zander urged her. “Answer it. I’ll get some wine glasses down for us.”

  Because he’d been the one to fix her cabinet door when it broke last week. He knew exactly where she kept her glasses.

  The phone rang again. “Excuse me, just for a moment.” She hurried to the phone. Unknown caller. That was odd. Alice’s finger swiped across the screen. “Hello?”

  Silence.

  Not unusual. Sometimes, her connection was terrible. She kept meaning to get a landline at the cabin. She walked a few feet and said again, “Hello?”

  There was nothing. No response at all. Alice hung up the phone. “Probably a wrong number.” She tucked a lock of hair behind her left ear.

  He’d gotten down the glasses. “That happen a lot? You getting wrong numbers?”

  “No.” She headed back toward him. “That’s actually my first one since I got the phone.” A new phone for her new life. New city. New home.

  New Alice.

  At least, that had been the plan. Only she didn’t feel new. She felt like the same old, hiding coward she’d been since Hugh’s death.

  Zander opened the wine. Poured her a glass. Poured some in his—

  The phone rang again. She glanced down at the screen. Unknown Caller. She shoved the phone onto the counter and reached for the wine glass. “Not going to get it this time. It’s just a wrong number.”

  The phone vibrated again. Zander lifted a brow. “How about I answer and tell him to screw off?”

  She gave a quick laugh, surprised, but Zander was already reaching for the phone. His fingers slid ac
ross the screen, and he put the phone to his ear. “Hello, asshole.”

  He waited.

  So did she.

  “Anyone there?” Zander demanded. “Look, since you’re not talking, I’ll just tell you—I think you have the wrong number. And we’re busy, so don’t call again.” He ended the call. Put the phone back on the counter. Smiled at her. “See, problem solved.” A pause. “Now how about that dinner? Then we can enjoy dessert.”

  ***

  Alice wasn’t alone. The man’s voice had been cocky. Too arrogant. He was in her cabin. Night had fallen, and the stranger was in Alice’s home.

  He shouldn’t be there. Alice didn’t date. Alice didn’t have a lover or even a casual boyfriend.

  The man shouldn’t have been there.

  Anger stirred, moving deep inside.

  He shouldn’t be there, Alice. You know he shouldn’t be there. Alice knew the rules. She also knew what would happen if she broke the rules…

  ***

  Thunder rumbled, and a crack of lightning flashed just outside of the window. Alice jumped, startled, and some of her wine spilled over the edge of her glass.

  “Sounds like the storm is coming closer.” Zander sat near her on the couch. “Guess that’s my cue to leave.” He gave her a slow smile. “Dinner was amazing, Alice. Thank you.”

  It had been a good night. They’d eaten. Laughed. Had the cupcakes and a little more wine. He’d told her stories about growing up in the Blue Ridge Mountains, about going to join the Army, becoming a Ranger…

  He’d made her feel comfortable. She didn’t remember feeling this way, not in a very long time.

  Now, he was leaving. Her gaze darted to the window. “Are you okay to drive?”

  “Weather forecast said the rough stuff wouldn’t be arriving until around midnight. And I’m just down the road.” A little laugh. “I actually walked here tonight. My cabin is fifteen minutes north of here.”

  She knew that. Maybe she’d made a point of learning as much about him as she could. With her past, it paid not to be too trusting.

  Her gaze slid back to him, and she found his stared on her. Or rather, on her mouth. Immediately, Alice’s heartbeat kicked up.