“You didn’t go to his trial?”
I shook my head, glancing at Carter when his phone rang and he plucked it from his pocket. “Frank was really good. I couldn’t bear to look at Niall so they allowed me to give evidence via video link.”
I could tell he hadn’t heard me when his body appeared to vibrate by my side. His eyes were fixed on his phone screen. The air around us became tight as Carter seemed to suck the oxygen from it.
I took a sneaky glance at his phone and frowned. His ringtone continued and Carter stared at the name Cary. When it stopped he still stared at it like whoever had called him was going to burst through it.
“Everything okay?”
His head snapped around and he stared at me like he was unaware I was sitting beside him. He didn’t answer me, just stuffed the phone back in his pocket. The silence that fell crushed me nearly as much as the fury and emotion pouring from him. I didn’t know what to do or say so I just sat uncomfortably, sipping my pop.
Mack came bouncing in and I was glad to have his attention as the awkward quiet grew even worse, and leaving Carter to his own thoughts, I got up and went to wash up. It was obvious he was battling with something, and I wasn’t close enough for him to share with me. I didn’t like how much that hurt me.
“It was my brother.”
I jumped at the sound of Carter behind me. Grabbing the towel, I dried my hands and turned to him. He was looking at me but I wasn’t sure if he was actually seeing me.
“On the phone,” he clarified as if I hadn’t understood him. “Cary, my brother.”
“You don’t get on with your brother?”
He pulled in a long breath and shook his head. “No.”
A pain pulled at my chest as I struggled to comprehend the look on his face. “That’s a shame.”
“Is it?” His face darkened as his teeth grappled with his bottom lip and his eyes dropped to the floor.
“Yes.” I nodded. “Billy was seventeen when he died.”
Carter’s gaze lifted up to mine.
I smiled softly at the thought of my younger brother. “I was ten when he came along. And I absolutely doted on him. He was so clever, so full of life.” I leaned back against the counter and sighed. “You have no idea how much I would pay to hear his laugh once again, to see his gorgeous happy smile. To watch him play football, or to even hold him when he cried.”
Carter was staring at me, his eyes misty as tears fell from mine.
“I… I miss him, Carter,” I whispered as my heart refused to allow my voice strength. “Your brother is alive. You shouldn’t…”
I quietened when he walked towards me. Lifting his hand, he gently slid it along my cheek. His eyes were so fixed on mine that I couldn’t look away from him. He had every bit of my attention as he slowly leaned down and kissed me. My heartbeat burst into a new rhythm when Carter slid his tongue against mine and the press of his warm lips took my previous thoughts and eased them.
I whimpered when his hand ran upwards and into my hair, his fingers playing with a thick lock of my curls as his body pressed mine against the worktop. He was hard, his stiff cock forced against the softness of my belly in a none-too-subtle way, causing me to kiss him harder.
I was on fire, desire and need throbbing heavy in every fibre of me as Carter moved his arms around me and his large hands curled around the back of my thighs, encouraging me to lift into him. He hoisted me up until I was able to wrap my legs around him, and then, as he continued to kiss me, he turned and carried me through the house.
My bed was suddenly breaking my fall when Carter fell with me onto it. His small but rough groans were making me rub against him. I was dry humping his body like a goddamn slut in withdrawal, and the next moan that left me was due to pure shame, but Carter seemed oblivious to my embarrassment as he drove me higher and higher with every touch. Heat flushed my skin as his mouth ventured down the centre of my throat and his hand came up to caress my breast, his fingers kneading roughly through the thin fabric of my shirt.
I couldn’t speak properly, everything I tried to say came out a jumbled mess, but as if he could read my mind, Carter lifted my t-shirt and yanked it over my head. The cool air made my nipples stand on end even more but as soon as I shivered at the sensation, Carter enveloped one with his mouth and his teeth grazed the sensitive flesh through my bra.
Reaching behind me, the action forcing more of my boob at Carter, I flicked the fastening and unhooked my bra. Carter chuckled but didn’t remove his attention from my breast, his teeth now catching skin and making me gasp.
I pulled at his shirt and lifted it over his head, hating that he had to remove his mouth from my nipple so I could take it off him, but taking advantage, he moved his mouth to the other nipple and started another round of gruelling torture.
My hand slid over the skin on his back, the smoothness making my fingertips itch to feel more as I tucked my hands into the waistband of his jeans and smiled to myself at the rock-hard muscle that greeted me. “Shit, you have the firmest arse ever,” I mumbled, wincing at the lack of filter from brain to mouth.
“Thank you,” he mumbled back, making me giggle.
His eyes lifted to mine when I grinned down at him. But then his mouth took on a new journey and I stiffened beneath him.
His eyes narrowed and he tutted at me but I closed my eyes and forced myself to let him go with it.
“Look at me, Alice. Open your eyes.”
I took a breath and then did as he asked, opening my eyes and looking down at him as his soft lips tenderly brushed over the first of my mangled skin, the disfigurement ugly and insulting to my own eyes.
“This is beautiful,” he whispered. “It’s your life. Your fight. It shows your courage, and the intense love for your family.”
“It’s the evidence of my failure,” I argued quietly.
I was surprised when a small smile touched his lips and he pressed a kiss to another bit of mutilated flesh. “No. It’s grief in its most physical form.”
Before I could answer, his mouth moved further down my stomach as his fingers played at the button of my jeans. Beckoning me with a tap to my hip, I lifted my bottom off the bed so he could remove the denim from me. I felt exposed when he yanked my knickers down with them, but the way his eyes blazed with heat and a puff of air came from his nose made my eyes widen. I can only liken the sound to that of an angry bull; the sound it makes when it’s after the matador and is determined to hit its goal.
A dirty grin rose on his face before he palmed the inside of my thighs and pushed my legs wider open, exposing my most intimate part to him with absolutely no restrictions.
“Carter!”
“You’re utterly breath-taking.” His voice was choked and gruff, and a shot of heat burst up my spine then back down, hitting my clit with a throb of delight. “I always knew you’d be pretty, but fuck, my eyes are feasting on you.”
I nearly choked out that his mouth needed to feast on me but for the first time ever I managed to keep my runaway gob shut and just grunted at him.
However, once again, as if reading my mind, Carter dipped down, and when his hot mouth met my hot flesh, my head flopped back and I lifted my hips to greet his eagerness.
He growled and started to eat me out like I was his last meal. I’d never had such enthusiastic oral sex performed on me. I wasn’t innocent, far from it, but all my partners had had a quick dip then told me to repay their efforts with a blowjob, as if they only gave me swift lick so I should give them a long and hearty BJ – pfft. Yet Carter’s willing and almost impatient worship gave me wave after wave of pleasure. It was as though he was actually enjoying it, which was a surprise in itself. I wasn’t used to so much idolisation down below and I couldn’t help but grip his hair and ride with him as he brought me to orgasm time and time again. Every time I arched my back and gave in to the bliss he growled and lowered his mouth to devour my cum like a madman, his face completely sinking between my flesh to take it all hungrily
.
I was a dithering wreck when he eventually made his way back up my body to my mouth. I could taste my orgasm on him and instead of being disgusted I grew even more excited, slipping my arms around him in yet more need and haste. Three climaxes he had granted me, yet my body was begging for more. I wasn’t sure I would survive his devotion, but when I felt him kick off his jeans and his erection dipped between my thighs, I whimpered and pushed myself into him. My legs lifted around his firm backside and when his cock rubbed against my clit, we both moaned loudly.
His kiss deepened and he rocked his hips against me, sliding his cock along me and tormenting us both as my belly grew hot with lust.
“Carter, please.”
“Please?” he breathed against my skin when his mouth trekked along my neck.
I nodded, moving my head to the side to give him further access. His tongue ran tenderly along my skin and I clenched my teeth together as my body prickled with exhilaration.
“Please what, Alice?”
If he thought I was shy, he was going to be surprised. “I need you inside me, Carter. I want to feel your cock inside me.”
Another moan left him and I shivered at the sound but he didn’t disappoint me. His cock plunged inside me, and even though I was slick with all the orgasms, I still gasped at the intrusion. He was larger than any other man I’d had and my pussy quivered in delight around him as the ridges of him pushed my walls to their limit.
When he was fully inside he stilled and reared back to look at me. His eyes ordered me to gaze at him. He was so damn beautiful that I couldn’t look away anyway. His jaw was locked so tight that I worried for his teeth, and the way his eyes hooded over made me feel every bit of his own pleasure.
He took a deep breath and then moved inside me. My mouth fell open in ecstasy but I still couldn’t look away when his own face tightened, and if I didn’t know better I’d have said he looked in pain.
Something shifted in his eyes as he started to slowly rock in and out of me. I was hypnotised by him, the look of rapture on his face, his gaze full of adoration, and the pleasure that filled his features was so erotic that I couldn’t help but lift my hips to meet him in effort to give him even more.
His teeth clashed together and he hissed as a moan of pleasure rolled from me. Our need deepened and Carter started to speed up until he was driving in and out of me like the world was going to end before we managed to reach climax.
He was mumbling my name at the same time as he came down to kiss me, the sound of it making me dig my nails into his back to counteract the emotion coursing through me.
“It’s so good,” he rambled almost incoherently. “You feel too good. Why do you feel like this? Why?” His tone was restrained, angry even, and it confused me. “I don’t… I can’t. What the fuck is going on?”
I didn’t understand his argument with himself, and attempting to soothe him, I cupped his face and made him look at me.
“It’s okay, Carter. It’s alright.”
He growled and drove even harder and deeper inside me, making me cry out in pleasure and tipping me over the edge. The tightening of my muscles drew his own orgasm and he practically roared as I clenched around him and took every drop from him greedily. His face dropped into the crook of my neck as he pumped inside of me, each rush of his spunk warming me more and more. I could feel him throb through every drop and I trembled.
My body was vibrating, and our panting breaths mingled when Carter turned his face to look at me. There was something deep in his eyes, and when I saw it, it was like he’d just slapped me - regret, guilt, and sorrow. I didn’t want to look at it, it hurt, and I turned away from him, blinking rapidly to stop the tears that dampened my eyes. He was still inside me but I could feel every single one of his emotions. And they burned. They fucking crucified me.
“Alice,” he choked out.
I couldn’t look at him, I didn’t want to see it, so I shook my head and squeezed my eyes closed. Almost instantly, he pulled out of me and the loss of him made my belly twist with pain.
I didn’t open my eyes until I heard the soft click of the door, and he was gone.
IT WAS A while later when I woke. My body was still thrumming in satisfaction and I moaned as I rolled on to my back and stretched my body. A whimper caught my attention and I opened my eyes. It was still dark, and for a moment I was confused, but when I heard it again I realised it was Mack.
“I’m coming.”
His whimper changed to a short bark when he heard me and I winced with guilt. The poor thing had been stuck on his own all day and night and I didn’t doubt he was desperate for the loo.
Pulling on my robe, a faint glow from the bedroom window caught my attention. Pushing open the balcony door, I stepped out of the bedroom and onto the veranda that hung over my little cove.
As soon as I saw him and his fire, my gut dropped. He was sat with his knees drawn up, his face directed at the sea. It was stupid but I thought after what we’d just shared he would have moved on a little bit. But I’d been so wrong – again.
He didn’t notice me and I slipped back into the bedroom, closing the door so that his smoke wouldn’t fill the room.
I wasn’t sure if I was angry, hurt, or sad. I had hoped that what we shared had eased the grief in both of us. But Elizabeth had been his wife, and I was then angry at myself for expecting him to just forget her because we’d made love, or maybe to him it had just been a fuck. I winced at my own thoughts. How bloody gullible was I? Carter was a man; simple. I shouldn’t have expected more. What I thought was a closeness we’d developed was actually just a manoeuvre to bed me.
Mack yapped again and I pushed aside the sadness and quickly scurried down the stairs. He welcomed me with a bigger bark and a wag of excitement.
“Sorry, buddy.”
Instantly forgiving me, he lapped at my hand and bounced around until I opened the door and let him into the garden. I switched on the kettle and made myself a coffee while I waited for him to finish his business.
A ringing sound from the other room made me spin round and frown. I still hadn’t replaced my phone so I knew it wasn’t mine, and upon walking into the room I saw Carter’s phone lighting up from the sofa. It must have fallen out of his pocket without him realising.
The number showing was unknown and I hesitantly picked it up and answered. “Hello?”
For a moment there was nothing but silence and then a feminine voice came back at me. “Hello.”
Frowning, I took another look at the phone to make sure it actually wasn’t mine. “Uhh, hello. Who is this?”
“Don’t be sad,” she whispered. “It will work out okay.”
I stilled, unable to process anything but the softness of her voice. “I’m sorry, who is this?”
“Time,” she said somewhat strangely. “It mends all wounds. It will ease all the pain that makes it difficult to breathe each day.”
Every single hair on my body was strung to attention and I found it hard to breathe. “I don’t know who you are but I think you have the wrong number.”
I couldn’t help but wonder if it was one of Carter’s conquests. That she had been surprised a woman had answered and was trying to scare me. But then there was something knowledgeable about how she spoke to me.
“Patience will be your guide. Patience and love. Don’t stop trying. Never stop trying, Alice.” Then the sound of an endless tone rung out in my ear.
I threw the phone on to the sofa and shivered. My eyes darted around the dimly lit room and when the door burst open, I squealed. Mack came bounding in and jumped up at me, his long tongue hanging out of his mouth, bringing me back to reality with the hilarity of it.
“Back to bed.”
He looked at me with such big eyes that I couldn’t help but allow him upstairs with me. I didn’t acknowledge the fact that I was spooked after the phone call. I just felt sorry for him, that’s all it was.
Two days later, Janie looked at me suspiciously when I
told her I didn’t want to do the dinner delivery. “Why? I thought you liked getting out around the village.”
“I do but I have a headache today.” As I had yesterday, and the day before.
I didn’t give her another chance to argue as I shoved through the door into the main café area and swiped up my order book.
“Hello, Alice.”
I smiled at Mr Frey when he called me over to his table by the window. It was the first time I’d seen him in Betty’s and I realised I hadn’t seen him since the day he’d sold me my new home. That in itself was strange in such a small village. “Good morning, Mr Frey.”
“How are you settling in, dear?”
“Perfectly,” I told him honestly. “Your village is beautiful.”
His smile was soft and his eyes twinkled at me. “I thought it would suit you. Kingfisher House offers tranquillity if nothing else.”
I nodded, completely agreeing with him. “What can I get you, Mr Frey?”
“Just a cup of tea, please.”
I jotted it down and as I turned back towards the kitchen, my eyes caught the window. My heart stuttered when I saw Carter talking to a man outside the garage. He was wearing a tight grey t-shirt that was covered in grease and oil. My mouth dried and I swallowed as I continued to watch him. I hadn’t heard from him since I’d slept with him. I was hurt that he’d just dumped me without explanation or even an excuse.
He nodded to the man he was talking to, then as if he’d sensed me, his face turned slowly towards me. He stared at me, his expression unreadable as his eyes caught mine. He seemed dejected, a slowness to his movements and a pain in his gaze I was completely mesmerised by. It mirrored my own. I understood him more than he obviously thought I did, but I was still hurt by his avoidance of me; that he didn’t trust me enough to talk to me.
I blinked and dropped my eyes to Mr Frey when he took my hand and gave it a small squeeze. “Give him some time, my dear.”
I stared at him, confused by his understanding as he gazed sadly up at me.
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