Jaden's Heart

by Melanie Jackson

  I looked at her. “I have arranged things financially with Mr. Whitmore. I would just like her to have a superhuman bodyguard on standby. You know, just in case.”

  Desiree set the glass down, walked over, and sat beside me. “You'll be fine,” she said, trying to reassure me.

  “Ivy was the last Immortal to pass the Seer’s test and that was thousands of years ago,” I reminded her.

  “Exactly. Ivy was crazy. If she can pass, you definitely can,” she said.

  I scowled at her.

  “Sorry,” she said. “I know you two were a thing once.”

  I sighed. “It's okay.”

  “Well, if I were you, I wouldn't be worried about dying. I would be more worried about whether the test is going to turn you as crazy as Ivy.” Desiree patted my back.

  “Thanks, Desiree. I feel so much better now,” I said sarcastically.

  She laughed. “If it makes you feel better, if something happens to you, I swear to check in on Alexis.”

  “Thank you, Dez,” I said, slightly reassured.

  “I wouldn't worry,” she said, moving back to the couch. “You're too stubborn to die.” She opened her book returning to the story within.

  I stood to return to Alexis. “I hope you're right,” I whispered.

  “I'm always right,” Desiree replied as I left.

  “You can't take the Seer's test!” Annora ordered, her voice echoing in the empty hallway.

  Great! “Not now, Annora.”

  She easily crossed the space between us and pushed me up against the wall. “I forbid it.”

  I shoved her away from me. “I don't have a choice.”

  “Yes, you do. Tell them you made it up!” she demanded.

  “You don't understand.”

  “Then make me understand,” she replied.

  I leaned against the wall. “I'm doing this to be with Alexis.”

  “For that fucking human?”

  “I'm not going to argue with you about this. I have much to do and very little time,” I replied, straightening.

  Annora clutched my arm. “Jaden, you could be killed!” Her voice was thick with worry and I recalled vaguely how she had used my real name only once before, as I lay wounded after the attack on the summit.

  I stood frozen in place. She cares about me! The revelation brought joy but also pain. I wanted to hurt her, to drive her away, but I could not. Despite what she had done to me, I still cared for her.

  “Annora.” My emotions twisted within me.

  “I can't lose you. You're all I have left,” she said, her voice breaking.

  Her emotions overwhelmed me.

  “Please, Jaden. Don't do this.”

  I swallowed hard. “It's the only leverage I have.”

  Annora stared at me, confused for a moment, and then realization struck her. We stood in the hall, a deafening silence between us.

  Thirty-Three

  alexis frowned at the painting on the wall. Didn't I just pass this? This is just ridiculous, no one needs a house this large—not even Jaden. How am I ever going to find her?

  “You're planning on signing a contract with the council?” Annora's voice echoed down the hallway.

  “If I am, it's not your concern,” Jaden replied.

  Alexis tiptoed to the corner, peered around it, and listened. She knew she should not, but eavesdropping was a learned fault. One she was not quite ready to give up.

  Jaden turned but Annora grabbed her arm and spun her around to face her. “Jaden! You can't be serious!” She pushed Jaden against the wall. ”Are you crazy?” she cried.

  “Then tell me what to do, Annora. They're going to take her from me,” Jaden's voice was desperate.

  “You don't know for sure—”

  “I've seen it!”

  “But you can't seriously be considering a contract with them,” Annora said, her tone worried. “You and Alexis will be magically bound to it. There are no loopholes. It can't be reversed. If you break it or fail to meet its guidelines, you'll be killed.”

  Alexis fiddled with the hem of her shirt. A contract, magic—killed! What is Jaden planning?

  Jaden scowled. “I'm not a fool, Annora. I know the risks.”

  “Like all those other Immortals who signed on the dotted line? Dammit, Jaden. Look at where they are now—bound eternally to the council or unnamed corpses in unmarked graves. Are you really going to sacrifice your freedom for her?” she asked.

  Jaden flinched.

  “Your freedom, for a human. Think about it,” Annora said, her face searching Jaden's.

  She swallowed then nodded somberly. “If it means being with Alexis. I will be chained once again.”

  Alexis covered her mouth with her hands. Jaden was going to enslave herself, give up her freedom—for her.

  “Don't do this, please,” Annora begged.

  Jaden waved her hand dismissively. “I have no choice. The council's decision is unfair. Their fears are unfounded.”

  “Are they?” Annora’s voice was loud, angry. “Did you think you could slack on your responsibilities to your people, to the First, and still receive the same courtesy as everyone else? Did you truly believe there would be no consequences?”

  Alexis could see the truthfulness in Annora's words cut deep into Jaden's heart, a pain she felt too. Jaden hid her eyes with a shaking hand.

  Annora closed the space between them. Lifting her chin, their eyes meeting, she said, “Please love, do not do this.”

  Jaden swallowed hard. “I have to.”

  A twinge of jealousy built within Alexis as Annora gently kissed Jaden. She bit her lip hard and her body trembled when Jaden didn't pull away.

  They separated. “I will be here even if you choose that human over me. I created you. I refuse to see all my hard work destroyed by infatuation.”

  Jaden's voice trembled. “I'm sorry.”

  “Go be with the human. Time is never on their side.”

  Alexis turned and began to walk back down the hall the way she had come. Every step felt like her limbs were weighted with lead.

  “It's quite interesting the things you learn by eavesdropping, isn't it?” Annora asked, amused.

  Alexis turned to see her leaning up against the wall, staring at her.

  “If the conversation was private, you should have had it elsewhere,” she said hotly.

  Annora laughed. “Perhaps Elysian does not know you as well as she thinks she does.”

  “Perhaps,” Alexis echoed.

  “What is it you really want from my oblivious servant?”

  Alexis scowled. “I don't want anything. I just love her.”

  Annora scoffed.

  “Believe what you want,” she said, turning.

  “So you love her enough to let her give up her freedom for you? To allow the council to chain her as she had been as a mortal?” Annora asked.

  “I trust Jaden. I'm sure she knows what she's doing,” Alexis replied.

  I hope Jaden knows what she was doing.

  “So are you ready?” Annora asked, closing some of the space between them.

  “Ready?” Alexis asked, confused.

  “I don't know where you stand on the subject, but I know Elysian doesn't put much stock in heaven or hell. What about you? Are you ready to trade an eternity in heaven for one here on earth? To trade your soul to the devil?” Annora asked, grinning.

  Alexis scowled. “Jaden isn't evil.”

  “Really? Isn't there an old saying: judge a man by his actions? Are Elysian's actions in your best interest or are they one sided?”

  “What do you mean?” she asked, feeling uncomfortable about the direction this conversation was heading.

  “You're not stupid. You have only dated her for a few weeks. I can understand the infatuation; she provides you with safety, money, and the love you need to fill the void left by uncaring parents,” Annora said, raising an eyebrow. “Elysian's infatuation with you is even clearer. She wandered the earth for nin
e hundred years, alone and deeply wounded by my mistakes. When she found you, it was like fulfilling a distant dream that she carried around with her all these years. I wonder if you did not need her to fill your emotional and physical needs, would you still love her?”

  “I don't know,” Alexis admitted, her voice a whisper.

  “A better question might be, how comfortable are you with giving up your human future? You know she plans to make you one of us. Do you know what that will truly mean? I'm sure she's told you about the great things that come with the change, but has she told you the bad?”

  Alexis swallowed hard. “I've seen movies.”

  Annora laughed. “Movies! Silly child, understand this: you will be bound to this forever. Time will have no meaning, people will suffer and die, but you will remain as you are, physically unchanged. Boredom sets in quickly—things that once held meaning will give you no pleasure. If you are physically or emotionally in pain, there are no tears, no way to ease the pain. Eventually, you lose yourself; you find anything, any way to provide meaning, fulfillment, joy or pleasure to your life,” she said, stepping closer to her.

  “Then there is the lust for blood—human blood. It will always be calling to you, demanding you kill. Eventually, the demon will win. At first, it's hard to live with everything you've done. Then, the more you kill the less human you become and the less you care. You begin to see them as inferior, and the small remorse you had in the beginning quickly fades away. Men, women, children... soon there will no longer be a difference in your mind.”

  “Jaden isn't like that,” Alexis pointed out.

  “Silly girl! Of course she is. I taught Elysian and by the time I changed her, she had no grievances about killing. She murdered everyone in my castle, including the fifteen children that lived there—all under ten years old. She murdered a whole family in their sleep, including the infant in his crib. She and Ivy roamed the countryside for a hundred years killing and burning people alive, boarded up inside their homes.” Annora brushed the fiery blush creeping up Alexis's throat with her cool hand.

  She stepped out of her reach. “You're lying!”

  Annora shook her head. “You know she will not let you remain human even if it was your wish. Elysian has lost so much that in her mind, it is the only way to keep you. Once she changes you, you will be forever bound to her, just as she is bound to me. Whether you are together or not.”

  Alexis shook her head. “I don’t believe you. Jaden promised she'd never do anything to me without my permission.”

  “Don't be naive, human. Elysian grips so tightly onto people who give her any form of affection, good or bad. She cannot see she smothers them, drives them away. She wouldn't let you go—not unless there was something in it for her,” Annora said.

  “That's why you left. Because Jaden wanted you to give yourself only to her and you couldn't,” Alexis accused.

  Annora sighed. “Stupid girl. I left because I was testing her. I wanted to see if she truly cared. If she would wait for me. Clearly, a mistake on my part.”

  “What did you expect?” Alexis stormed. “You tortured her! No one would wait for someone like that, let alone love them.”

  “I see she has told you about some of her time as my slave. Are you aware then of the nights of passion we shared, or the things she did to prove her love and devotion to me?” Annora asked.

  Frowning, Alexis turned to walk away but Annora trailed her down the hall.

  “I didn't think so. When I spoke, Elysian did as I commanded. She bent to my every whim and desire. She has had sex with whomever, whenever, wherever I wanted. She even killed for me—not once but many times. If I had known leaving would give her an aversion to responsibility and control issues, I would have never left,” Annora said.

  Alexis did not want to hear any more. She didn't want to become a monster and she didn't, wouldn't believe that Jaden was one.

  “I don't believe you. You're just trying to make me leave,” she said.

  “I could care less what you believe,” Annora replied.

  Alexis stopped in the hall and confronted Annora head on. “What is it you want?”

  “I want you to understand what you're getting yourself into. I want you to choose to live, to find out who Alexis is. Do not commit yourself to an eternity with Elysian before you are truly willing to accept who and what you will become. Because once you commit yourself, you will be unable to take it back. If you suddenly regret your decision, you will blame her and leave. This would scar Elysian irreparably,” Annora explained.

  “I would never hurt Jaden.”

  Annora mustered the kindest smile she could and her gaze softened. “Not intentionally. But even Immortals change, learn and grow apart and without knowing yourself, you will change like the leaves in autumn.”

  Alexis's throat felt thick and tears threatened to fall. Annora’s right; I don’t really know who I am. My life up until now has been about running and hiding. I haven’t even begun to live. The flickering fluorescent lights of Sal's Diner and Annie's maternal embrace flashed across her mind. He’s dead. I‘m free to stop hiding. I can go anywhere, do anything—I can live my life.

  “Don't let Jaden sign that contract. Let her go. Let the council wipe your memory and live a full human life. You might find out there are things you're not ready to give up—human things.”

  Alexis tried to swallow her pain, but she could not, and large tears fell across her cheeks.

  “I'm not trying to hurt you. I just feel you deserve to know what your choices will mean. Not only for you, but also for Elysian.”

  Desiree rounded the corner and was at Alexis's side in an instant.

  “What's going on?” she asked, eyeing Annora up and down.

  Alexis wiped her eyes on her sleeve and sniffed.

  “Think over what I said, child,” Annora said, turning she walked down the hallway.

  Desiree wrapped a protective arm around Alexis. “Whatever she said to you is a lie. She's a vile and manipulative bitch.”

  Alexis nodded but part of her knew that Annora had spoken the truth. She looked up at the older woman and smiled wearily. “Was there something you needed me for?”

  Desiree grinned. “Jaden has a surprise dinner planned for you tonight. I was wondering if I could dress you up.”

  She eyed the woman suspiciously.

  “Please? It has been ages scene I've gotten to dress anyone,” she pleaded.

  “All right, but don't overdo it,” she replied, not in the mood to argue.

  She had learned so much about Jaden in the last few minutes that it gave her pause. Do I really know Jaden? Am I ready to give up my soul—heaven? Alexis felt numb. Jaden wouldn’t really sell her freedom just to be with me, would she? I’m not worth someone’s, anyone's freedom—especially Jaden's.

  Thirty-Four

  as I had finished conferring with the chef about what meal to serve Alexis for tonight's date, a wide-eyed maid rushed into the kitchen with the council’s summons. They requested my presence in the ballroom forthwith.

  When I entered, they looked regal in their customary garb: white linen tunics and pants for the men and long dresses for the women. Gold accents shimmered with each of their movements. I tried to picture myself in the dress and heels as I watched them float about the room, mingling with each other. It was a lot easier to picture myself in the tunic and pants. I did not mind dresses; however, these with their multiple layers of slips, petticoats, and wire cages tied to your waist, never struck me as fashionable. Or practical.

  “Jaden, welcome!” Lady Marianna said, gliding over to me and embracing me.

  She released me and I bowed. “Lady,” I said respectfully.

  “If you're going to be a councilwoman, you should get used to calling me Marianna,” she said, grinning widely. “We are glad to have a new member.”

  “I'm not on it yet,” I pointed out.

  She wrapped her arm around my waist and led me over to the others. “It's o
nly a matter of time.”

  I felt uncomfortable; the council members and I were not exactly friends, although neither we were we enemies. I could feel their animosity towards me, feelings I could hardly blame them for. There had not been a new member since its founding and for a lowly member of the First to join them was not only an insult, it put their own power at risk. In their eyes, I threatened all that they had built since the High King's defeat. How could I be joining them? I knew that this position was only a formality to appease tradition and keep me on a short leash. Regardless, I felt unworthy. Nothing I could ever do would be enough to allow me to stand among them, the great leaders of the Immortal rebellion, these ancient heroes. My heroes. They had stood up against the High King’s vision of a nation of pure, untainted demons. Every Immortal, including me, owed the rebuilding of our society to each one of them.

  I will never be one of them, but I have to do this for Alexis. Although, I wish there was a way to do this without putting myself at the top of every Immortal’s hit list.

  Lord William nodded courteously at me and I bowed.

  “Do you feel you are ready for the responsibility that comes with sitting on the Immortal Council?” Lord François asked, his turquoise eyes kinder than our last encounter.

  “I will do my best to uphold the council's ideals but no one can replace Ivy. Despite her eccentric lifestyle, she was a strong leader and a patriot,” I replied.

  Lord Joffrey grinned, brushing his brown locks over his shoulder. “Word is the two of you had a sexual relationship.”

  “Ivy was an unforgettable partner,” I replied, grinning as I remembered the crazy places and situations our sexual encounters placed us.

  “Really? She was always so strange,” Lady Nadia said, straightening a lock of her black hair with thin fingers.

  “I think she used it as a way of keeping everyone at a distance. Right after the first time we were together, she told me a relationship with her wouldn't work out, but she was going to seduce me anyway,” I said, grinning.

  Lady Elizabeth’s hazel eyes widened. “Did it end badly?”

  I shook my head. “No, one day she came into my bedchamber, told me it was over, and I that I had to go back to the First.”