Laces and Lace (Assassins #6)
Page 35
“What does her dad have to do with any of this?”
“He apparently calls every day, and while I am glad he does because she does love him, I feel like he is setting seeds in her to take her away again.”
His mom scoffed and then said, “Jesus, Karson, what is wrong with you? I’ve never heard you so insecure and paranoid.”
He smirked, feeling a little silly as he said, “I don’t want to lose her.”
“You won’t as long as you love her and do right by her. Stop worrying about all the outside shit. It’s about you two. That’s it. As long as you love her and she loves you, nothing else can touch that. You have to believe that.”
“But I loved her and she loved me nine years ago, and look what happened. I spent nine years without her.”
She paused. “Okay, maybe you’re right, but you two are adults now. Surely she can see through the bullshit. You both just have to believe in each other.”
“I believe in us, Ma. I’m just worried she doesn’t. I’m scared she misses home and wants to go back.”
“Have you told her this?” she asked, and he could tell she was getting frustrated with him. Hell, he was frustrated with himself.
“No, she’s already upset I left. I don’t want to put all that on her too,” he said, running his hand through his hair again.
“Communication is the key, Karson. How are you both supposed to feel good about your relationship if you don’t talk about the things that bother you?”
There was a lot they needed to talk about, but neither of them was doing it. Before he could answer her, she asked, “Have you two had a fight yet?”
He thought for a moment. They’d had little tiffs but not a full-blown fight. He hadn’t wanted to upset her. “No, I hope we don’t either.”
“Why? You need to. Fighting is good. It means that there is something to fight for. Don’t walk on eggshells around this woman because you are scared to lose her. Don’t be a doormat, Karson. That is just insane.”
“No, I won’t. I just don’t want to upset her because I’m insecure.”
“I get that, but you guys have been living in this honeymoon phase, and now that you two are apart, you are unsure of your relationship. That’s not good, Karson. You need to feel good about you guys twenty-four-seven,” she said and he nodded. Like always, she was right.
“Is he acting like a pussy again?” he heard his father ask.
“For fuck’s sake,” Karson muttered as his mother laughed.
“Leave him be! This is why he doesn’t talk to you. You’re an asshole. Jeez!”
“Man, I love you too,” his father barked at her.
“Love you more, sweetheart!” she called and Karson laughed.
“Thanks, Ma,” Karson said with a grin.
“Anytime, my love. Now do me a favor and call Lacey. Talk to her.”
“You don’t think that’s something I should do in person?” he asked, when subconsciously he was trying to prolong the conversation with her. While his mom was completely right, he really didn’t want to upset Lacey. Which again was something that was bound to happen. Man, maybe he was a fucking pussy. It was all Lacey’s fault. She did this to him.
“Stop trying to drag this out. FaceTime her and fix all your uncertainties before you do something you’ll regret. Like retire or drive that girl away with your insecurities. Because, while you haven’t voiced them, one day you will, and it will be a clusterfuck of crazy and she’ll run the other way. Communication, Karson. Communication.”
“Okay, Ma,” he agreed. “I’ll call her once I’m done talking to you.”
“Good, and I promise you, it’s going to all be fine. You two are meant to be together.”
“I’m glad you think so because her family doesn’t agree.”
“’Cause they are jackasses.”
“Jackasses you’ll be breaking bread with at Thanksgiving.”
“Why on earth would we do that?”
“Lacey invited them.”
“I thought she was a smart girl,” she said and Karson smiled. “Oh well, the sooner, the better, I guess. It will be awkward, but they are family.”
He nodded. “Yeah, yay for in-laws.”
“Yay, indeed,” she said with a laugh. “But I did get a beautiful daughter-in-law out of it.”
Karson grinned as he slowly nodded. “Yeah, you did.”
“One you’re about to call.”
Shit.
Biting the end of her pencil, Lacey eyed her drawing while trying to decide if she liked it. It was a white lace scallop-edged bra that tied in the front and around the neck. The panties were scalloped too with matching ribbon ties at the sides, but what made the set was the design of the lace. It had big peony flowers in it with little touches of smaller ones. She tried to imagine it in black, maybe teal or purple, but the white was the one that stood out the most.
Yup, it was a keeper.
Setting it to the side, Lacey smiled for the first time in five days. She had been so stressed with Karson leaving and working her ass off that she hadn’t been able to draw, but when she woke up that morning, she had the urge. So she found herself out on her patio, wrapped up in one of Karson’s big sweatshirts and his big sweatpants with a blanket wrapped around her and a hat on her head with her pad on her lap.
She felt productive, finally.
After doing lots of moping and cleaning, she’d finally decided to take a shower last night and now felt a little more like herself. She still missed Karson more than words could describe, but she was able to go back to her daily routine. It helped that he called whenever he could and sent her cute little messages and also that she hadn’t worn anything but his clothes. While yes, they drowned her, she felt closer to him and it helped. So she was going to stick with what worked and didn’t make her want to commit herself to a mental hospital.
It was all her fault though. The moping and the cleaning and not showering. Elli had invited her over twice this week, and even Reese had Facebooked her about getting together, but for some reason she came up with an excuse for why she couldn’t do anything. It just wasn’t the same. They weren’t Karson, and they sure as hell weren’t Rachel or any of her friends back home. It was just hard. She wasn’t sure why, but she just didn’t want to do anything. The fact she was drawing was a surprise.
Maybe it was the start she needed to get back to herself. Should she go to the wives’ dinner to watch the guys play? It didn’t seem as horrible as it had sounded when Elli invited her. Maybe she could go and really get to know the women. They truly were nice and cared for Karson. They didn’t know her and didn’t have to be nice to her, but they had, and because of that, she should give them a chance. She needed to start to set some roots in Nashville and make friends. It would be ideal, and maybe then she wouldn’t feel so alone since Rachel wanted nothing to do with her and her husband was off playing hockey.
Yeah, she’d go. It would be good for her. It was time to put Karson’s clothes up and put on some of her own. It was time to spread her wings and make Nashville home. Happy with her decision, she worked more on her drawing with a grin on her face. She couldn’t wait to tell Karson she was going out tonight. He would be happy for her and excited that she was getting out. She knew he was worrying like crazy about her, and maybe this would ease his worries and her own.
When her phone rang, she looked up from her notepad to see that it was Rachel. Her brows pulled together because today was Rachel’s off day, which meant she didn’t call Lacey.
Reaching for the phone, she hit accept and said, “Hello?”
“I miss you,” she blurted, and Lacey could tell she was either crying or holding back the tears.
Pausing, Lacey wasn’t sure what to say, but then said the only logical thing. “I miss you too.”
Rachel let out a sob before saying, “I’m sorry. I really am. I thought that you were leaving to hurt me, but you weren’t, and it’s taken me so long to realize that.”
“
Well, this is sudden,” Lacey said, sucking in a deep breath.
“Yeah, I know,” she said and Lacey could hear the tears in her voice. “Me and Grady got into it last night, and he’s right. You have to do what makes you happy.”
Lacey nodded. “I never wanted to hurt you. I just wanted to be happy, and Karson makes me beyond that. I had to follow my heart.”
“You’re right, and it was wrong of me,” she said, hiccupping. “You accepted me when I started dating Grady, and I know that was weird. I was wrong and I’m sorry.”
Lacey’s heart exploded in her chest as she cuddled deeper in Karson’s clothes. He was going to be ecstatic to hear that Rachel apologized. Lacey sure was. “Water under the bridge,” she said, her grin unstoppable. “So you’ll come for Thanksgiving dinner?”
“Of course. When your dad said that you had invited us, I was surprised. But then Grady and I were talking, and he told me what your dad did. I felt so stupid and I’m so sorry for doubting you. I realized that you deserve to be happy, and if Karson is the guy to do it, then I support you two.”
“Thank you,” Lacey said as a tear rolled down her face. “That means the world to me. I’ve been so lonely without you.”
“I have too,” she agreed and Lacey grinned. She finally had her best friend back. “So, man, I feel so much better. Anyway, what are you doing?”
“Sketching. Karson is away. He’s playing in LA tonight.”
“Oh wow, I didn’t know he was gone.”
Probably because you never asked, Lacey thought but instead said, “Yeah, he won’t be back till next Monday.”
“Oh, really? Why don’t you come home then? We can hang out and the boys would love to see you. Grady comes back Wednesday and we can all go to dinner. It would be great. I know you were coming in on Friday, but come in early. It would be awesome!”
Lacey bit her lip. “Oh, I don’t know. I have things to do around here, and I was supposed to go to dinner with the other wives tonight.”
“You can do that another time. Come home; let me take you out to make up for being such a bitch. We can go to Michigan Ave., and I’ll get you something nice.”
Lacey wouldn’t mind going home. She did miss the boys and would love to see Rachel. It had been a long month without them, and she could always go to dinner with Elli and the girls another night. She had been dreading going home since things were shitty between her and Rachel, but that wasn’t the case now. She could go home and visit, and it would be like old times. Time would fly by. It was a no-brainer.
“Yeah, let me see if I can change my flight and I’ll call you back.”
“Cool! I’m so excited!”
“Me too,” Lacey said with a grin. “I’ll call you back.”
“Okay.”
Lacey hung up the phone and gathered her things to head inside. After locking the door since she still was a tad bit scared of being by herself, she laid her things on the island and looked up the number for the airline. Within minutes, her flight was changed and she was leaving later that night. Excitement coursed through her body as she texted Rachel her flight info and then rushed upstairs to shower and pack. But when she got halfway up the stairs, she paused.
Maybe she should have called Karson first?
She doubted he would care one way or another, but still, it would have been considerate of her. Unlocking her phone, she went to his contact, but before she could hit call, her phone started ringing with a FaceTime call from the same person she was just thinking of.
With a bright grin on her face, she hit accept and almost came out of her skin when Karson’s gorgeous face appeared on the screen.
“Hey baby,” she gushed, her heart pounding in her chest. Seeing him did something to her; she missed him so damn much, and when she told him that, he smiled. He hadn’t shaved since he left and looked all rugged and sexy with his hair in disarray. When she noticed that he wasn’t wearing a shirt, everything inside her went scorching. Jesus, he looked good.
“Hey sweetheart, I love seeing that smile on your beautiful face.”
Her cheeks warmed as she made her way up the stairs. “Seeing you put it there,” she cooed as she entered their room. Falling onto the bed, she held the phone out but changed the angle a few times so that her face didn’t look so fat as she said, “What are you doing?”
“Lying around, just got off the phone with my mom.”
“Oh, how is she?”
“Good, she says hi,” he said with a loving smile.
“I can’t wait to see her,” she said, wishing that he were lying next to her. She wasn’t too sure how she was going to handle not seeing him for the next nine days, but thankfully Rachel and the boys would keep her busy. “I was about to call you, actually.”
“You were? Miss me that much?”
Lacey’s heart stopped. “More than you’ll ever know.”
“I miss you more than that,” he said with a wink that sent heat straight between her legs.
She giggled as she sucked in a deep breath. “Nine more days without you is going to be torture. I want to feel you against me,” she whispered and he nodded.
“I want the same thing, sweetheart. I do,” he said roughly. “Only nine days and then you are mine.”
“Mmm. I can’t wait,” she said, beaming at him. When he smiled back, all his pearly white teeth gleaming, love warmed her chest. Man, she loved him with such intensity. “Anyway, I was calling not only to say I love and miss you so much, but I am going home early.”
His grin fell as his brows came in. “Home?”
“Yeah, back to Chicago,” she said slowly, waiting for his face to change, but it didn’t. Instead, his brow furrowed more. “What’s wrong?”
“Lacey, Chicago isn’t your home anymore. Nashville is. With me.”
She paused, eyeing him. “I never said it wasn’t. I really didn’t even mean to say that. I’m just excited to go back.”
“Oh, really?” he asked, but sarcasm dripped from his voice.
“Yeah, Rachel called and she apologized. She wants me to come early so we can hang out and stuff. I figured since you weren’t home, I would go.”
Gauging by his reaction, she decided she must have figured wrong. “So Rachel just called out of the blue and apologized?”
Chewing the inside of her cheek, Lacey thought his statement through. The way he said it made it sound like it was suspicious, but that wasn’t the case. She knew Rachel and knew that she meant every word. “Yeah, she and Grady had been talking, and she came to the realization that she was wrong.”
“After a month, she finally decided that? I don’t think so, sounds a little fishy to me,” he said and that irritated Lacey.
“Rachel loves me, always has. She was just being selfish, and I forgive her for it.”
“Conveniently,” he muttered and Lacey was no longer irritated, she was pissed.
“What the hell does that mean?” she snapped as she sat up.
“I just think it’s funny how she all of a sudden wants to forgive you when I’m gone. It’s not like I can come up there with you, so now they can try to convince you to stay.”
Her brows came in as she shook her head. “She didn’t know you were gone.”
“But your dad does,” he pointed out. “And he probably told her, and then they thought up this master plan to get you to come back and ultimately stay.”
“That is crazy! Do you hear yourself? Come on, Karson.”
“He’s broken us up before, Lacey. Remember that,” he stated, but Lacey didn’t want to hear that.
“He has been very good to me lately. He hasn’t once talked bad about you while on the phone with me—”
“Doesn’t mean he isn’t running my name through the mud and plotting against us,” Karson said, interrupting her. “I just don’t trust them, and you’re so easily manipulated, Lacey. All you want is your family to accept us, but you don’t see that they can be conspiring against us.”
“Karson, stop! T
hey wouldn’t do that. They want me to be happy, and they see who makes me happy. That’s you,” she snapped. Then glaring, she said, “Well, usually. Right now you’re just pissing me the hell off.”
“I don’t care. You aren’t thinking clearly. I’m trying to protect you.”
“I don’t need you to protect me from my own family. I’m fine and know how to handle them. You said yourself that they would come around, but now you are accusing them of plotting against us.”
“Yes, I thought they would, but it wouldn’t be the total 180 that both of them have done. Just yesterday you were talking about how big of a bitch Rachel was being, and now she calls and everything is sunshine and unicorns? That doesn’t set off any kind of alarms. Didn’t you talk to your dad yesterday?”
She had. But she wasn’t going to give Karson the satisfaction of knowing that. “I don’t see how that matters. She realized her wrongdoing and is rectifying it, Karson. Shouldn’t you be happy for me? I’m going to have my best friend back, my family.”
He shook his head, and all of a sudden, she was looking at the ground, his bare feet the only thing she could see. “Karson?” she asked, and finally his face was back on the screen.
“I don’t trust them,” he said, letting out a long breath. “And I’m freaking the fuck out thinking that they are going to talk you into staying, and I’ll lose you again.”
She’d wanted to be with him so much before, but at that moment, she would give anything to be in front of him. She wanted to wrap her arms around his neck, touch her lips to his, and just hold him. Maybe then he would see that she wasn’t going anywhere without him for good. “Karson, you aren’t going to lose me. I’m yours.”
“You were mine before, but then your dad ruined that.”
She paused, eyeing him. What the hell was going on? “I thought we buried that? I thought we were moving forward, not rehashing the past. What happened to believing in us?”
“I do, but do you?” he asked, meeting her gaze. “’Cause lately, you’ve been quiet, and I feel like you’re hiding shit.”