Her Master's Courtesan

by Lily White

  “Aiden! Aiden, please!”

  I kept screaming until my voice became hoarse and scratchy. My legs were shaking from the pain wrecking my body and I slid to the ground by the door screaming his name – over and over again.

  I’d started to grow quiet – no longer screaming, but still slamming my fists against the door. Finally, I heard the lock click and I crawled away quickly, giving him room to open the door.

  He walked through, wearing nothing but black silk pajama pants that flowed like molten ebony with each step he took into the room.

  “What the FUCK are you doing?”

  He reached down and grabbed me by my hair, throwing me towards the bed. My head hit against the wall and the adrenaline and endorphins rushed through my blood. I gasped at the sensation and before I could react, he was on top of me, his knee jammed painfully between my legs and his hand around my throat. I opened my eyes and locked my eyes with his, purposefully pissing him off more. I needed his pain – needed the sweet sting of a whip, or crop or whatever the fuck else he could think of to hit me with.

  His palm slapped across my cheek and my head spun to the side from the blow.

  “Aiden … Aiden … Aiden … Aiden … Aiden …”

  I kept repeating his name, spitting blood from my mouth where I’d bit my lip when he hit me.

  His hand wrapped painfully in my hair and he dragged me off the bed. My shoulder, hips and ankles hit the floor with a painful thud and tears sprang from my eyes when it felt like he would rip my hair from my scalp.

  When I was laid out on the floor, he climbed on top of me, holding my shoulders down with his knees and grabbing my head between both hands. It felt like my skull would be crushed in and I blinked up at him, coughing from the weight of his body sitting on my chest. His eyes burned down at me, a seething rage swirling behind the deep blue color.

  “What the fuck is wrong with you?”

  “I want to be punished. I want to be hit, I want to feel pain.”

  I was blubbering out a bunch of words that made no sense to a logical brain, but the emotions consuming me had erased all logic. I was swimming in pain, flailing like I didn’t belong anywhere anymore. I didn’t feel like I was connected to my life or my body and I knew if he would just give me what I needed, I would reconnect and finally regain my grasp of myself.

  He looked at me for a long time and I was so scared that he would say no, that he would leave me drowning in an emotional vacuum that kept me from gaining my footing in my life. After a few minutes he blinked – his expression void of thought or emotion … and he took a deep breath and let it out slowly. The heat of his breath and the mint smell of toothpaste brushed over my face and I felt more tears drip along my skin.

  “Fine. I don’t know what’s wrong with you or why you’re acting this way. But, if you need pain, I’ll give it to you.”

  He pushed up from the floor, reaching down to grab my hand and pull me up beside him. We walked quietly to the room he’d taken me to several times during the time I’d been here. When he opened the door my eyes looked over at the bed where he’d fucked me – now remade with crisp clean sheets – the memory of our moments erased completely from its surface.

  He forced me up against a wall, my nose crushed against the hard plaster, his hand on the back of my head holding me in place. He strapped my hands into leather shackles and bent down to strap my feet into the iron shackles affixed to the wall.

  “What do want tonight, pet? Since you obviously think you RUN this fucking show. Tell me what you want!”

  He pulled a crop from the wall slapping it against the backs of my thighs so hard; I could feel small dots of blood well at the surface. My knees gave out, but I didn’t fall far, my body pressed into the wall and my wrists were caught in the shackles.

  I gulped air into my lungs which, moments before, I hadn’t been able to breath. That one slap had started pulling me from the suffocating blanket of pain I’d sunk in when I imagined the truth of what my life was and what it had become. Nothing was mine, everything was an illusion, and the people who hurt me before were now destroying something that I’d thought for a split second could make me happy. When my anxiety started to heighten again and when my heart beat against the walls of my chest, I knew I needed more – I needed him to beat these thoughts out of my head, to take me away from the life before, to refill me with everything that he demanded I should be.

  Pushing back on my feet, I picked up my weight and turned my head so that my cheek rested against the cold surface.

  “Please, Master. Hit me again.”

  He stood very still. I watched him from the corner of my eye and he stood there – staring out at me with impassive eyes.

  “Have you lost your mind, Rebecca? Are you trying to get yourself killed? How fucking dare you scream for me, use my name or demand anything from me!” His voice was loud and authoritative and it wasn’t anger that dripped from his words; it was something colder – something ominous and certain. It was the voice a person used when they had no connection to another person - mechanical and cold.

  He wasn’t irate or annoyed with me – he was finished with me.

  His voice told me that I’d pushed him too far.

  Aiden

  She’d lost her fucking mind. That was the only explanation I could come up with. Never before had a courtesan snapped to such a degree. Small hints of continued rebellion – yes. But to totally revert? To suddenly be screaming and breaking every fucking rule she could think of?

  I stood behind her watching her body tremble against the wall. Blood seeped out where I’d struck her, but it wasn’t enough to run down from the small cut. Her eyes were half closed and her breathing was labored. It was the most interesting thing I’d seen happen with one of the women I trained.

  But this was the first time I slept with one in front of the other – the first time I allowed a courtesan to witness the initial rape of another woman. The trauma of watching would have been bad enough, but then I made her participate. Had I shattered her by doing so?

  “Please. I can’t breathe. Please hit me again.”

  She was having an anxiety attack and her words barely passed her lips. They were so quiet that I realized she didn’t have the strength to speak. I watched as she staggered where she stood – obviously lightheaded from the panic coursing through her body.

  “I don’t want to hit you, pet. Not when it’s something you need. I don’t perform on command and I won’t be told what to do by a whore. What I will let you do is calm down. I’m going to leave you here for an hour. When I return, I expect you to be back to normal. I also expect an explanation for your behavior. I won’t put up with this bullshit from anyone.”

  I dropped the crop on the mattress behind me and left the room. As soon as I left, she wailed and banged her hands against the wall. I leaned back against the door listening to her scream and cry. I’d done this to her and without intent. Because of the odd feeling I had for her, the amusement that peaked my curiosity a bit too far, I’d broken one the rules of my profession and driven her mind over the edge.

  Cursing under my breath, I walked down the hall and into the exam room used by James when he checked the women for disease and administered the birth control. Opening one of the small silver drawers of a medicine cabinet, I retrieved the small syringe filled with a strong tranquilizer. I was concerned that Rebecca would hurt herself – not so much because I worried about her welfare, but because I couldn’t present the buyer with damaged goods.

  I would sell her. Normally, under the guidance of another Master or a softer owner she could improve. She seemed open to an owner who would give her some type of affection. But I wasn’t him. I was grateful for her submission, but it would never be love. I proved that to her tonight when I raped her friend in front of her. I would never change for her – never give up the lifestyle I’d grown to enjoy. It was my life and I couldn’t care enough about her to change any part of it.

  It was foolish
of me to consider keeping her while continuing my practices as Master. Of the four I knew personally, none of them kept a full time courtesan. It was too difficult to focus for lengths of time on another woman. When you were simply an owner, you didn’t have to dedicate time to breaking down and connecting with a slave in order to shape them. Owners received them pre-packed, stripped of their personality and abused to a point of submission. It was simple to handle them at that point and you could establish rules that didn’t require a connection – you didn’t have to reach their minds, their brains and their hearts in order to reform them into the perfect pet.

  But I did – and I pushed one too far because I allowed something foreign within me to get involved, to take control and to lead me into making a decision that I knew to be wrong.

  Exiting the exam room, I returned to the room where Rebecca was bound. I stood by the door listening, waiting to see if she continued to cry or if she’d escaped whatever Hell her mind had created. It was completely quiet and I opened the door. When I entered I stood still, watching her. Blood dripped down her legs where she’d banged her knees against the wall. She’d passed out, hanging limp from the wrists restraints and I rushed to release her from the binds. Picking her up, I carried her to the bed and pulled out a medical kit from the side table. After cleaning the wounds on her knees, I examined them to find that they were only minor cuts, but the developing bruises had me worried. Her wrists were bright red from where she’d hung from her restraints and I massaged the skin, attempting to alleviate the marks.

  Her eyes blinked open and she stared at me for several seconds from somewhere I couldn’t reach her. Eventually, recognition flooded her gaze and she sat up quickly, throwing her arms around my neck – her body shaking from sobs. I could feel her tears dripping onto my shoulders, slowly sliding down my back and chest.

  “What is wrong with you, Rebecca?”

  I spoke softly, afraid of jarring her back into the level of anxiety she’d demonstrated before. I wondered if there was a psychological condition that was triggered by the events of the evening. She continued to cry, not answering me immediately and I pushed her body away grabbing her chin to lift her face to mine.

  “Answer me, pet. I won’t allow your emotions to interfere with the rules I’ve given you. Your behavior tonight was unacceptable…is still unacceptable.”

  She didn’t answer me, the green of her eyes shone with her tears and when she blinked and reopened them, I was struck by the level of pain I saw saturating the crystal green. It occurred to me that I needed to go back to my original intentions with her – I needed to sell her and move on with my life the way I’d planned from the beginning. There was something in this woman that I couldn’t reach – a deep-seated strength and pain that could not be abolished simply by physical pain or degradation. In order to fix her, I would need to understand her – but that isn’t the type of man that I am. I worry about myself solely and I don’t have time to consider the needs of a woman who is nothing more than a slave.

  “This is why I didn’t want to keep you, Rebecca. You’ll never be able to handle what I do. There is nothing that will change me. Your love is something I’ve gained from every woman I’ve trained – I make you love me, or at least, I make you believe that you do. I don’t want love – I don’t make love – I fuck, I train, I sell, I move on. That is my life and will continue to be my life. I believe now that you’ve seen who I truly am, it’s pushed you over an edge that isn’t good for either of us.”

  She shook her head, bringing her hand up to wipe away the tears that still fell down her face. “No. Please. I’m sorry, Master, I didn’t mean to lose control, and I didn’t mean to forget my place.” Her body started to tremble and I worried that she would return to the anxiety-fueled madness in which I’d found her before.

  Her full lips opened again and words I didn’t want to hear flowed from her mouth; further setting her apart from all the other women I’d trained in my time as a Master.

  “I don’t want to go back to my old life, but I looked at it. I’ll admit that. I went through Kelsey’s things and I looked through her phone. I didn’t call anybody or communicate with anybody, but I wanted to see what I left behind. I didn’t like it. I watched …”

  I put my finger over her mouth to silence her. I didn’t want the details of whatever it was that she was running from. I didn’t want to know her on any level other than the feel of her mouth, her body, her ass, or her cunt. Those were what she was good for and I didn’t need the weighted knowledge of the woman I destroyed. I was pissed off at myself as well – for allowing her to keep the bag I noticed she carried. I should have taken it from her immediately when she climbed into the car.

  I realized quickly that she hadn’t been lying – she had not forgotten her place.

  I’d forgotten mine.

  It was time I rectified that mistake.

  “It’s doesn’t matter, pet. We have reached an impasse, one that I will need to resolve. I’ll continue to train you and I’ll train Kelsey as well. I don’t want to hear about the past and I’ll remove you from it.”

  Reaching in my pocket, I wrapped my hand around the syringe. I pulled it out, flicking the cap off with my thumb before injecting into her arm. Her eyes widened at first, shock overtaking her from what I’d done.

  Solemnly, I watched her eyelids blink and her eyes roll back. She took a deep breath in as the medicine took effect. Her body relaxed on the bed and I laid her body down, lifting her head to place a pillow beneath.

  She wasn’t asleep, but in a dreamlike state. My fingers brushed across her leg and she pushed against the tips. Her hips rotated against the mattress and I slid my hand up farther, finally playing along the slick and sensitive skin between. My pants tented as my cock hardened.

  Moving over her on the bed, I straddled her, running my free hand over her abdomen and cupping the weight of her breast. She moaned – lost in a drugged haze. Nothing mattered to her now, because she wasn’t there. However, her body was and I wanted to taste it again. Even banged up and insane, I couldn’t resist her. I fought to keep myself from knowing her – from exploring exactly what it was about her that made her stand out. She made me weak because she was like me – she just didn’t know it. Looking back on the days I’d spent with her, she’d never submitted completely – never forgot her own thoughts or opinions. She’d simply changed them.

  Instead of hating a man who refused to let her go – a man who took her body again and again and gave nothing in return – she decided to want him, to love him. She didn’t react weakly by giving in, she’d found another part of herself, a woman that was hidden deep inside her, and she gave in to that woman. I hadn’t noticed it because it was unexpected.

  I placed my knees between her legs, spreading them wide. Her head rolled across the pillow and her fingers gripped into the sheets. The candlelight from the wall sconces brushed shadows across her body, small black flames licking the skin. She was at the ultimate level of submission – a mind that was absent and a body that wanted the pleasure I would give.

  Reaching across her, I opened a drawer in the bedside table, quickly retrieving a condom and ripping the package open with my teeth. I’m an absolute pervert – the idea of a woman who can’t and won’t resist, turned me on as much as forcing a woman to take my cock. The circumstances didn’t matter, if her legs were spread, I wanted to bury myself inside.

  I’d fuck her tonight – sweet and slow – something I’ve never done for another woman. It wouldn’t matter – she wouldn’t remember and I could continue in my training the following day. She would return to the woman who couldn’t let her own desires go and I would be harder on her – crueler. It was a game I would not lose and I would eventually wash my hands clean of the mistakes I’d made with her.

  After pulling the pants from my body and rolling the condom down my cock, I buried myself inside her. This was the last time I’d let her break my rules, the only time I’d allow her the benefit of m
y affection. I respected her for having touched me – for having accomplished something no woman had done before. I’d give her what she wanted tonight and tomorrow, I begin the process of letting her go.

  I pushed inside her, forcing myself deep. Her moans were music to my ears and when her hands came up – when her nails raked down my back – I hissed. My fingers ran roughly across her skin, leaving pink trails along her cream complexion. Her body arched up and I took her breast in my mouth, biting down, marking the swollen flesh and flicking my tongue out at the pebbled tip.

  My hands were under her thighs and I lifted her hips up to feel her legs wrap around my waist. I fell over her, holding myself up with my arms, looking down into eyes that were unfocused and heavily intoxicated. She smiled and her hand was suddenly in my hair. Pulling my head down, she kissed me – and I kissed back. Our mouths ground against each other like two people who couldn’t get enough. Sweat dripped down along my body and onto hers. My hair was soaked and when she stopped kissing me, she ran her mouth over my neck, lapping at the salt and taste of my skin.

  She found a release so quickly, the muscles gripping and tightening around me.

  My words came out on a growl, from somewhere deep and primal inside me. “Do you like that, pet? Do you like being fucked when you can’t fight back?”

  She moaned in response and spread her legs wider. I pumped into her, my hands squeezing at her breasts. I grabbed a leg and flipped her over suddenly, shoving her head against the pillow and lifting her ass in the air.

  My eyes closed as I fucked her harder than I’d fucked anyone before. When I was done with her cunt, I moved to her ass, burying myself deep inside, the muscles stretching to accept my size without hesitation. She screamed my name when I moved inside her and I actually enjoyed hearing it. But, that enjoyment annoyed me, and I pumped harder from my building rage with myself. I didn’t want to feel anything for her and I refused to let her make me. I kept telling myself that this encounter would happen only once and that it was something I wanted and not her.