Can't Forgive You (Second Chance Diaries Book 2)

by Emma Vikes

  Catherine pursed her lips. “As Miss Wilson had mentioned earlier, she had gathered documents from the bank that you’re signed with. She didn’t seem to have gotten any evidence from any of your offshore accounts.”

  My eyes narrowed at Catherine. “I just said that Julija doesn’t have any access to those accounts.”

  But Catherine shook her head. “You may have forgotten that you’ve once asked Miss Burrows to handle your account in China, Mr. Crewe.”

  I gritted my teeth in annoyance as she turned to the judge and said she no longer had any questions for me.

  Olivia stood now. “You’ve mentioned that Miss Burrows had been your personal accountant for four years.”

  “Yes.”

  “And with that said, is that the only relationship you have with Miss Burrows?”

  Her question took me aback but I saw the intensity in Olivia’s eyes. Beside her, Julija sucked in a harsh breath.

  Catherine was quick to object. “Objection, Your Honor, the question isn’t related to the case.”

  But in her opening statement, Olivia had already mentioned that the whole thing was done as an act of revenge. She had gotten the judge’s attention then. “Overruled. Continue with your question, Miss Wilson.”

  “What is your relationship with Miss Burrows?” A sparkle lit in Olivia’s eyes.

  I wondered if she was asking the question to ruin what we had. But we were in the middle of a trial and she was my lawyer. If anything, our personal lives weren’t involved in these proceedings. I licked my lips and let out a shaky sigh. “She was my personal accountant.”

  “Was there anything more than that?” A challenge now showed in Olivia’s eyes.

  I pursed my lips.

  Behind her, Julija was on the edge of her seat.

  “We used to see each other outside of work but it wasn’t anything special. She might’ve thought it was but I swear to you, it wasn’t,” I sounded like I was defending myself to Olivia.

  She merely let out a soft chuckle.

  Julija slammed her hands on the table. “Liar!”

  But the rest of what she had to say was muffled by Catherine.

  I returned to my seat while Julija continued to glare in our direction. We seemed to have ticked a nerve with her and were on the right track.

  The room buzzed with excitement and the judge sought order for the court.

  “We’ve heard enough for this first hearing and the jury has gathered a lot of information. On our second and last hearing, we will find what their verdict will be in this case. Until then, the jury is thanked and excused and the court is adjourned.”

  24

  Olivia

  I eased my car into the garage and released a long sigh. Suddenly, I felt incredibly nervous in a way that I wasn’t earlier today when we were in court. Telling Amy the truth was a more terrifying situation than facing a judge and the jury, trying to defend someone’s innocence. As a lawyer, I swore to uphold the truth but right now, I just wanted to turn back and hide.

  But Logan’s car appeared right next to mine a moment later and I knew I couldn’t get myself out of this situation even if I tried. Besides, it would be unfair if I did. All throughout the week, Logan had been patient with me. He had so many opportunities to spring the truth to Amy but he chose to wait until today because that’s what we’d agreed on.

  He got out of his car and gently knocked on my window.

  I rolled it down rather than opening my door.

  Logan crouched, so we could be eye-level with each other. “What’s wrong?”

  Biting my bottom lip, I shrugged my shoulders slightly. “I’m just scared of how Amy will react.” My voice echoed my fear.

  Logan’s eyes softened. He motioned for me to unlock the door.

  I did and he opened it. He crouching lower now and he reached for my hands and held them in his. “You did what you thought was the right thing at that moment. All you ever tried to do was protect her from what could’ve hurt her.”

  I could feel the tears brimming in my eyes again. Honestly, in the last years, I imagined things would unfold with Logan hating me so much for keeping Amy from him the way I did. He would be angry at me. I think it would’ve been easier to wrap my mind around that situation than this.

  Although, I’d come to terms with everything, it still left me baffled. Logan had been upset but not with the intensity I had imagined he would. He seemed to have maturely grasped the situation and the reason behind what I did. It hurt him, yes, but he was more focused on wanting Amy to have a complete family than to hate me.

  “Even if it meant keeping her from her own father?”

  Logan smiled sadly and touched my face gently. “What’s done is done, Olivia. We can’t change the decisions we made in the past. All we can do right now is face whatever repercussions our decisions have in store for us and make our way around it as best as we can.”

  “Why aren’t you angry at me?” I found myself asking him. All throughout the week and when I came home last night after having dinner with him, it was a question that nagged at me. “Why don’t you hate me? I kept your daughter from you for ten years, Logan. You can hate me if you want to.”

  Logan’s green eyes searched mine and he sighed, shrugging his shoulders delicately. “Other than the fact that I’m in love with you, I do understand why you had to do it. If I were you, I would probably have done the same thing. Any parent will always try to shield their child from any heartache that the world can bring to them.”

  I sniffed and then gently squeezed Logan’s hand. “Are you sure?”

  He let out a small laugh. “If you really want the truth, what you did upset me and hurt me. But it’s already all in the past. It was also something you did because of what I did. But if we keep on bringing it back and dwelling on it, we can’t fully live in the present. And I would very much want to live my present with my daughter and you by my side.”

  A part of me wanted to tell him he could have that if he wanted but I immediately backpedalled from the thought. Logan had been sweet, understanding and truthful when I needed him to be but I was still hesitant. I was already aware that he had changed in the last ten years and yet, he was still the same Logan I fell in love with when I was eighteen.

  I was still teetering on the edge of the cliff, still hesitant to take the plunge. “Amy must be waiting for us already.”

  He nodded at me and helped me out of the car. Like yesterday, he helped me with the things I brought for work and carried it for me as we went inside.

  Amy was in her room when we came in.

  Raquel was waiting for us in the kitchen. She asked me how the trial went and I recounted it to her as best as I could and then she left right after that.

  Logan had went to Amy’s room.

  I had gone into mine to change.

  When I came back downstairs, the two of them were sprawled in the living room on the floor, papers scattered around them. They both looked up at me, with matching grins that tugged at my heart. “What are you two doing?”

  “Logan’s helping me with my project in homeroom. We’re supposed to make a family tree and I’m meant to report on mine on Monday.”

  I pursed my lips, momentarily wondering if this was a sign from the universe or if it was all just coincidental. But then again, even last year, I’d heard about this project. Amy and I made the same thing last year and even when we were making it, she never dared ask me about her father. Sometimes, it made me wonder why she didn’t ask about him.

  Amy was already nine years old. She was old enough to notice something was different in her life and that someone was lacking. But even when she was younger and always saw that there were fathers accompanying her classmates, she never asked me where hers was. Sometimes, it felt like a blessing but other times, it made me worry more.

  I sat beside them, cross-legged on the floor. I checked the pictures that were mostly Amy and I and the ones she had of my brothers and Mom. She even had an old p
icture I had of my Dad. She knew that he wasn’t in the picture anymore but she never asked why. She just knew that he was somewhere in the world existing.

  Sometimes, it made me wonder if she thought of her own father in the same way.

  Logan and I watched as Amy put my parents’ pictures first and they were followed by me and my brothers. She then placed her picture under mine. She hadn’t glued everything on the board yet but I caught myself staring at Logan for his reaction.

  His mouth was set in a thin line and his jaw ticked.

  My heart went out for him. Gently, I put away the pictures that Amy had placed. “I think there’s something you need to add to all of this, slugger.”

  Amy looked at me curiously and I could also feel Logan’s gaze on me too.

  I went to the guest bedroom and took the box from under the bed, the one Logan found a week ago.

  I heard Logan suck in a breath when I came out carrying it.

  I rummaged through the pictures and plucked one of his. I gingerly began to set everything the way Amy did at first and then put mine and Logan’s together.

  Underneath our picture, I put Amy’s.

  There was a moment of silence after that action and then Amy let out a gasp. She looked at Logan and then at me. Her hazel eyes held the question that she couldn’t seem to verbalize.

  I felt a lump on my throat, my eyes stinging with unshed tears.

  Slowly, Amy turned to Logan and what used to be a look of awe morphed into betrayal. “Where were you?”

  The hurt in Amy’s voice sounded so raw that it pierced through my soul.

  She kept staring at Logan, the pain clear on her face.

  Logan was stunned at the question and the hurt in Amy’s voice. He tried to open his mouth to speak but it seemed like he didn’t have the right words to say. Or maybe her reaction had rendered him speechless.

  I gently forced Amy to look at me and held her face in my hands. If there was anyone who needed to explain, it should me. “He didn’t know, Amy. Logan and I dated when we were in college and I was pregnant with you when we broke up. I didn’t tell him. I-I didn’t want to tell him.”

  Amy furrowed her eyebrows. “What? What do you mean you didn’t want to tell him?”

  I swallowed, feeling a little helpless.

  Meanwhile, Logan finally found the courage to speak and he moved closer to Amy so he was in front of her. “I broke your mother’s heart and I did it so callously that she feared I would break your heart had she told me about you.”

  “Would you?”

  Logan looked down and took a moment to collect himself. “I’m not sure. I don’t know. All I know is, at that time, I had things that I wanted to do, things I wouldn’t stop talking about. I was young and wanted an empire and that was all I ever wanted. Your mother knew that which was why she was scared that one day‒had I known‒I would leave you two and break your heart.”

  Amy’s eyes glistened with tears. “Would you have done that?”

  Logan let out a shaky breath and leaned back, looking down. “I honestly don’t know but if we keep dwelling on the ‘what if’, we can’t really move forward with the here and now. And in here and now, I would really like to be your dad, Amy. That is, if you’re willing to let me.”

  Another blanket of silence fell upon the three of us.

  Amy stared at Logan. There were tears streaming down her face.

  Logan reached to wipe them away.

  She didn’t lean back or flinch but let him do so. “Do you promise you won’t leave?”

  Logan flashed her a small smile and slowly nodded his head. “I’ll be right by your side and you’ll be annoyed of how clingy I am.”

  Amy let out a small laugh and threw her arms at him, clinging tightly at Logan.

  My heart burst at the sight of them. This was something I always imagined when I’d been pregnant with her and it was an image I thought I’d never see until she was older and looked for him.

  But here they were now, in each other’s arms, with Logan gently rocking Amy to stop her from crying.

  When she pulled away from him, she turned to me and approached me. Amy reached out to touch my face and wipe the tears I hadn’t noticed were flowing.

  “I’m sorry, Amy. I’m sorry for keeping it from you. I’m so, so, so sorry.”

  “It’s okay, Momma. Mother bears are protective. You used to tell me that all the time,” she murmured, hugging me tightly.

  We stayed like that for a while, her small arms around me, and then I felt Logan’s strong ones around us. He rocked us gently back and forth and we remained like that until I pulled away, telling them I had to make dinner.

  I left them to work on Amy’s project, noting how animated she was to do the whole thing. They were halfway done with the project when I called them for dinner.

  Amy went back to working on it after she ate and Logan helped me with the dishes. At around nine, Amy was ready for bed and Logan volunteered to tuck her in.

  I opened a bottle of wine and poured it into two glasses. When Logan came back downstairs, I offered him a glass.

  He took it and sipped. “That went better than expected.”

  Slowly, I released an exhale and swirled the wine in my glass, leaning against the staircase. “I didn’t anticipate she’d be angry. Amy...I’ve never seen her angry. She must’ve had so many questions but she never asked.”

  “She must’ve thought it would hurt you.” Logan turned to face me fully and then reached out to touch my face.

  My heart lurched at his touch and I shivered.

  He sighed. “I asked her if she ever wondered about me and she said that she did. Her classmates used to tease her a lot and asked questions and she never knew how to answer them.”

  “How come…?”

  Logan stroked my hair with a small smile on his face. “She was scared that asking would only hurt you. She said that you were trying so hard on your own that she didn’t want to upset you with all the questions she had. You raised such a strong girl, Olivia, thank you.”

  I choked back a sob and almost dropped my glass but Logan took it from me and set both glasses aside before pulling me into a hug. It was then when all of my defences suddenly fell away. I’d had to be a pillar of strength for Amy for ten years and this felt like a release. I cried in Logan’s arms as we sank to the floor and he continued to hold me tight.

  “It’s okay, Liv, it’s okay,” he whispered to me repeatedly. “I’m here now. I won’t leave. I will never go anywhere without the two of you.”

  But other than my defences, the wall I’d futility built to stop myself from falling for Logan crumbled too. I think I just fell in love with him all over again. Or maybe I never really stopped.

  25

  Logan

  I woke up to find a spread of breakfast on the table with Amy and Olivia busy in the kitchen. I’d been sleeping over at their place since Amy found out. She refused to let me go home, so I’d basically moved in to the guest room. I didn’t mind the whole set-up because it meant I could spend more time with Amy.

  And Olivia didn’t seem to be bothered by the whole thing either. She didn’t mind that I was always hanging around. I didn’t even go home this time around and each time I tucked Amy in bed, I would come down to find her with a glass of wine for me. We would end up talking and it was always the perfect way to end the day.

  Our conversations weren’t forced anymore and neither one of us were walking on eggshells with each other. Olivia was loosening up again and each time we said goodnight to each other, I had to resist the urge to kiss her right there and then. I still didn’t know if she wanted to be with me in the way I wanted and I had to respect it.

  “What’s all this?” I asked, trying to tame my bed hair.

  Olivia wasn’t dressed yet and was still in her pajamas while Amy had already showered and dressed for school.

  Amy kissed my cheek and gave me a hug. “Mom mentioned that you two would have a long day today so we dec
ided to have a hearty breakfast to prepare for it.”

  I couldn’t help but smile. “I’ll just shower then. You’re already dressed for school and I don’t want you to be late if I eat first and shower later.”

  But Amy shook her head and grabbed my hand, dragging me to a seat. “You can walk me to the bus. I’ll take it for today. We have the rest of my school life for you to drive me to school.”

  The way she phrased it melted my heart and I wanted to hug her really tight again. It was still hard for me to wrap my mind around the fact that Amy was my daughter. Hell, it was still unbelievable to believe that I had a daughter with Olivia. But more than anything, I loved the fact that I did and that I had this with Liv.

  Since Amy told me she was going to take the bus, the three of us sat down to eat breakfast together. It seemed surreal. Even if the three of us had been together for meals before I found out, it still felt good to be eating with other people. With ones I actually wanted to spend time with and enjoy a meal with.

  I walked Amy to the bus after we finished eating and when I got back, Olivia was washing the dishes. I watched her from behind. “You know, I could get used to this.”

  She paused and craned her neck to look at me, her eyebrows rising. “Get used to what?”

  I had to resist the urge to cross the distance between us and wrap my arms around her, resting my chin on her shoulder while I pulled her close. I wanted to inhale her sweet scent, cuddle her and let her warmth relax me in a way that nothing ever could. “You.”

  It was only one word but enough to make her fluster. She was quick to turn around and finish washing the dishes.

  I couldn’t help but chuckle and then proceeded to the coffee maker she had. I put the capsule in and waited for her coffee. Once it was done, I set it right beside her, making sure she wouldn’t knock it over. “You didn’t have coffee with your breakfast,” I told her with a light shrug when she stared at the cup on her right. “You must’ve been all over the place earlier to have forgotten that your day doesn’t start without caffeine.”