Forbidden: a Contemporary Romance Anthology

by J. L. Beck

  “I won’t ever get tired of you,” I tell her while she pauses to take a shaky, labored breath.

  “And I just believe that? Because I’m stupid? While I’m taking my clothes off for someone else, I just believe that? When I start getting sent to men to fuck me, I just believe that? How can you share me with other men?”

  I don’t want to think about that. As long as it’s just some faceless creep on the other side of a computer screen, I’ve been able to not think about it. But soon she’ll be making outcalls to clients.

  No, she fucking won’t.

  “I won’t share you with anyone,” I say. “I love you, Kat. And I won’t let another man touch you.”

  She freezes when I say it, but when I try to hold her, she pushes me away.

  “You love me? Or are you just lying to me?” she says.

  “I’m not lying. I love you. I think I fell in love with you the moment, I first saw you,” I say, and it’s more true than anything I’ve ever said.

  “Take me away from here, if you love me,” she says, crossing her arms over her chest. “Unlock the door, and let’s go away from here together.”

  “It’s not as simple as that,” I say, wishing I didn’t have to. “There are rules I have to follow too. I can’t just take you for myself.”

  “It is simple. Love is simple. If you loved me, you would free me.”

  Her anger, her insistence, her not saying she loves me too, is messing with my mind. Has all this been a game to her? Does she have any feelings for me at all? Or is she just playing me to get what she wants? She’s so simple and so right, so pure and so innocent, and I’m fucking drowning in my love for her, but am I just seeing what I want to see?

  “That truck stop threat is no joke, Kat,” I say. “I’ve been to those places, and seeing the women there made me not want to have sex. And you know how much I like to fuck. I told you before, don’t make waves, follow the rules, and life will be good for you here. You have me. Don’t mess that up.”

  It came out too much like a warning, too harsh, not how I wanted to tell her, and my wish to just do what she’s asking, take her away from here and never look back, is choking me right now. But it can’t happen. It won’t happen. And the sooner she completely understands that, the better.

  She shakes her head and storms out of the room, turning back just inside the door.

  “I love you too, I hope you know that.”

  And then she runs up the stairs. And I want to believe her, since my heart’s pumping pure fucking joy at hearing those words. But can I? And can any good ever come out of our love?

  Rules about not messing with the whores are there for a reason. And I’m experiencing the full force of that reason right now. Maybe I should’ve just left her alone. That’s probably what I should do now, before this gets even more fucked up.

  So even though all I want to do is follow her upstairs, give her another night off, so I can show her all the ways in which I love her more, I call Rocco and tell him to take the night shift.

  Tony needs to be appeased, so Kat has to work her full shift today. I need time away from here, get my head clear again, figure out what’s what, and which rules I can safely break without fucking everything up.

  10

  Kat

  I’ve been working for two hours, but it’s not going well. I’m numb, can’t feel a single thing as I touch myself at the clients’ commands.

  I’m sorry I blew up at Vin, and I’m even sorrier he just left because of it. If this was a movie, he’d come running after me to tell me everything was alright. But this isn’t a movie, and even if it were, it wouldn’t be a romantic comedy.

  The room feels so empty, and sadder than a crypt without him in it. But I won’t take any of what I said back. Ever. I guess at least now I know where I stand, where I always stood with him, from the beginning. It was good, while I kept quiet. But as soon as I said what I truly felt, he bolted. I fooled myself into believing what we had was something more than just sex. That it was love, because love is what I feel for him. The kind I didn’t know was possible to feel for anyone that wasn’t family. And I believed he loved me too. He fooled me into thinking it, with his nice words and soft kisses. But I guess it was never real.

  “What is wrong with you today?” one of my regular clients texts.

  “I am fine,” I say, since I’m just here to follow orders. Be what they want me to be. Hot tears are in my eyes, the burning sadness erupting in my chest the first thing I’ve felt in hours.

  But I smile though the tears and shake my head, trying to signal that nothing is wrong.

  “I am sorry you are sad,” the man writes. “I would never make you sad, beautiful girl.”

  His friendly words are exactly the ones I needed to hear. Just not from him. Yet I’ll take them, I’ll take any kindness that can break through the darkness I’m in right now. The darkness that will be my life from now on. Because Vin clearly does not love me.

  The other girls here kept telling me how lucky I was to have snagged Vin, how it’s only a matter of time before I’m free again. Most of them secretly hated me for it. Well, now they’ll be happy, because he’s up for grabs. But they’ll also know how wrong their thinking was. How wrong I was to think he’d ever take me away from here.

  “???,” is waiting for me on the screen when I look at it again.

  My eyes flash to the message preceding it, which reads, “Would you spend the night with me, if I call for you?”

  I don’t think I’m hiding the shock, the fear, the pure terror I’m feeling at the idea very well at all. But I nod anyway and smile bravely. At least he asked politely. What more can a whore hope for? Because that’s what I am now. Just a whore.

  VIN

  Three hours and four scotches later, and all I’m still thinking about is other men seeing Kat the way only I should see her. Her accusation that I’m no kind of man for putting up with that stung. But only because it’s true. And not. I can’t put up with it, and I won’t. No real man can stand by while other men fuck the woman he loves.

  And I do love her. I know that now better than I knew it before.

  I love her and she will be mine. Rules can be bent. And if they can’t, well, then they’ll need to be broken.

  I gulp down the rest of my scotch and leave, am standing in front of the house within fifteen minutes, still not sure, if this is the best, or the worst idea I’ve ever had in my life. I’m leaning more toward the former, but rules are rules.

  “You can go now,” I tell Rocco who’s got the TV on so loud I can barely hear the moans coming from upstairs.

  He sits up on the sofa, eyeing me skeptically. “Maybe I should stay, Vin. Tony told me to keep an eye on things here.”

  “Go, Rocco. I’ll deal with Tony.” What I should be doing is reprimanding him for the disrespect he just showed me, but I came here to do one thing, the one thing I should’ve done on day one, and he’s just getting in my way right now.

  Rocco shrugs and gets up. “Fine, but it’s your funeral.”

  The warning is echoing in my head, as I wait for the door to close behind him. But it’s gone by the time I run upstairs and barge into Kat’s room. Her perfect curves are mostly covered up by a translucent shirt, which is good and not at the same time. And the shock on her face at seeing me is quickly turning into something much softer. I never want to see anything else there for as long as I live.

  “Sign off,” I tell her hoarsely, and shut the door behind me.

  She doesn’t move, just keeps staring at me, her brilliant blue eyes sparkling brighter and brighter by the second. So I shut off the camera and close the laptop, am kneeling by her and holding her hands, before she even has time to let out the sharp breath she took when I entered.

  “You were right, Kat. I love you, and I can’t let anyone else have you,” I tell her. “Will you be mine?”

  She nods, tears running down her cheeks, but she’s smiling. I kiss her, tasting the saltiness of her
tears, but so much more besides. I can taste her happiness, her relief, her love and mine, and I never want to stop kissing her. I’ll make it so I never have to. And right now, I’ll just pretend it’s a done deal, because I need her kisses as much as I need my heart to keep beating.

  Soon we’re on the bed, tangled in each other’s arms. We’ve been kissing for what feels like days. I’ve tasted every inch of her I can reach without releasing her from my embrace, and I’m ready to take it up a notch. I’m just about to start moving things in that direction when the door crashes open.

  “I fucking knew it,” Tony snarls. “You went too far this time, Vinny. I tried to warn you.”

  Tony and four of his bodyguards are crowding the doorway, and Kat’s breathing is growing erratic in fright.

  “It’s gonna be fine,” I whisper to her, then get up to stand between her and the men.

  “You’re the one who’s going too far, Tony,” I say, glad I’m still wearing all my clothes. “Get out of my house. I’ll discuss this with Dad tomorrow. You have no authority here.”

  He chuckles in that cold and cutting way he has. “Oh, but you’ll find I do. Papa’s put me in charge of all the whorehouses. You work for me now, and I won’t stand for this kind of insubordination. She’s coming with me, and you’re going right back to chasing down the small fish that don’t pay up fast enough. It’s all you’re good for.”

  Kat whimpers behind me, and my blood just fucking boils.

  “Try and take her, and you’ll see what happens.”

  He laughs this time, but there’s no joy in it. He turns to the guys behind him and points to me.

  They advance without needing a verbal command. I punch the first one that reaches me in the jaw, dazing him, since the time for talking is clearly over. Four on one is no kind of odds, and I’m sure even Tony will step in, if I manage to get the upper hand in this fight. I wish I had my gun, but I always leave that in the car when I’m here. Yet I know that a gun would be my only hope of winning this fight. Which won’t stop me from giving it my best.

  One of the goons lands a perfectly aimed punch to my kidney, but I manage to head butt another in the nose, his howl of pain filling the room.

  The remaining three advance on me as one, and I do land more punches than I receive, before one of them finally manages to pin my arms behind my back, and I get hit so many times and so quickly, I actually start to feel the pain despite the adrenaline pumping through my veins.

  I taste blood in my mouth as they pin me to the floor, their kicks pummeling me like they don’t plan on me surviving this fight.

  Kat screams and it’s the most bloodcurdling thing I’ve ever heard. I yell too, manage to raise my head just enough to see Tony drag her from the room. I struggle to stand, pouring all my hatred for him and all my love for her into the effort. But it’s not enough. A thick, hard fist lands in my side, making the sharp pain already there explode into mind-numbing agony. I keep this up and they’ll kill me. If they haven’t already. But I’m still trying to fight free, as a well-aimed kick to the side of my head makes everything turn black.

  11

  Kat

  “I won’t go with you! Release me! Vinny!” I keep screaming all that over and over again, as the vile dark man drags me from the room. I start kicking and punching harder, as we reach the stairs, but it’s as though he doesn’t even feel it.

  “Shut up, bitch!” he hisses, and picks me up by my waist. He’s much taller than me, and much stronger. I can barely move in his grip, let alone escape it. But I keep trying anyway.

  Once we are outside, I start yelling and screaming even louder. Someone in one of all these normal houses will hear me, and they’ll call the police. Vinny needs help too, those guys were hitting him so hard, and all that blood…I hope he’s still alive. The fear my thought brings makes me scream even louder, and lights in some of the upstairs rooms of the houses lining the street do come on. Tony throws me into the back of a large black Mercedes. I kick at him as he tries to get in beside me, but he swats my legs away like they’re nothing.

  “Drive!” he orders the man sitting behind the wheel.

  “Let me go!” I scream again, pulling at the door handle so hard it hurts, but it’s locked and we’re already speeding away.

  “No!” I scream, the lights from the houses we’re passing just a blur, because we’re going so fast.

  Tony grabs a fistful of my hair and yanks my head back. “It’s time for you to settle down now.”

  “No, I won’t!” I yell, my voice raw and hoarse.

  He punches me in my temple with no warning.

  “Yes, you will,” he says in a sickly soft voice as I begin to lose consciousness. “And you’ll do everything I tell you from now on.”

  I can’t fight the blackness overtaking me any longer.

  I woke up on a freezing cold concrete floor still wearing only the see-through negligee. The only light in this room is coming in under the door, but at least there’s light, at least I can see something. I always feared full dark, always had to sleep with a little light on in my room. My head is still throbbing from Tony’s punch, and the whole room lurches sideways, as I stand and rush to the door.

  I bang on it until my hands are throbbing worse than my head, and my voice is raw and hoarse and painful from screaming, but no one comes. I collapse in a heap by the door, still banging, but it’s more like taps now. I’m so alone and so afraid and so damn sorry, but there’s nothing I can do to fix it.

  I lie down on my side on the hard floor, kick it occasionally, but with no hope left. Where is Vin? Why hasn’t he come rescue me yet? He promised he’d take me away from all this.

  And I believed him. There’s no doubt in my mind he would do as he promised, if he could. So the only reason I’m still here and he’s not has to be that…no, I won’t even think it. When you start wallowing in self-pity then you truly are lost. Keep your head up until they break your neck. My father told me that once. And I hear his voice clearly in my head right now as I remember it. And see his proud face. I will fight until I have no fight left. Until I am dead too. Anything is better than this life.

  The door suddenly opens, Tony’s huge, menacing frame filling the doorway, and the sudden burst of light making my eyes sting.

  “Good, you’re awake,” he says, lifting me to my feet by my arm. But his action is far from gentle, and my head is spinning worse than before once I’m up. If he weren’t still holding me, I’d collapse right back down.

  “Fuck you,” I hiss at him. “Let me go.”

  I add some choice curses in my own language, and even though I’m sure he doesn’t understand, he probably gets the meaning anyway.

  He leans in closer, runs his tongue down my cheek. I recoil, but he yanks me right back.

  “You have some fire in you, I like that,” he says. “I’ll enjoy putting it out.”

  A shiver so violent passes through me that my whole body shakes.

  “Now how about a little kiss?” he says and leans in.

  I spit in his face, and the backhanded slap that earns me feels like my eye is exploding.

  “I’ll break you down, bitch, and I’ll enjoy it,” he says. “But I have other things to do now, and you clearly need some more alone time. But you’ll be begging me to kiss you before long.”

  “Never!” I try to yell, but my voice is just toneless and soft.

  He pushes me away and I stumble, my hip colliding painfully with the ground as I fall.

  Then he slams the door shut after him, and I’m alone again. For all my anger, my willingness and desire to fight, I know that’s the best I can hope for from now on. To be alone. Because being with him will be hell. His tone promised that all on its own, the warnings he uttered were just the topping.

  12

  Vin

  Tony’s goons really did a number on me, and I’m practically certain they left me for dead when they finally stopped kicking me. The girls in the house had no way to call for h
elp, but they did manage to get me up on the bed. It was down to my mother to call the ambulance in the morning. I was unconscious, but her crying and screaming woke me. I tried to tell her she should calm down, but my words were totally incomprehensible, which only made her crying and screaming worse.

  I woke up again in the hospital two days later, with four cracked ribs, half my face still swollen and every movement causing unbearable agony. But I discharged myself on the spot, only had to endure my mother’s screaming on the phone, since she thankfully wasn’t by my hospital bed to stop me leaving.

  I have to save Kat. And I’ve been clutching to that thought ever since.

  Tony’s taken her to his mansion, claimed her for his own and means to make her his toy. I know what he likes to do to women, and all physical pain is nothing compared to imagining that happening to Kat. But I only have one shot at getting her back, and I can’t fuck it up.

  I won’t go crying to my father over this and asking for his help. My mother’s done enough of that for ten people, I’m sure. But when he called, I had to answer.

  “What happened, Vinny?” he asked.

  “I fell in love with one of the girls, Dad,” I told him, since it’s the truth, and something I should’ve discussed with him before any of this happened. “And I want her.”

  He stayed silent for a full minute or more after that. And I tried to come up with some sort of an apology, but I’d already said the most important thing.

  “My rules about that are clear,” he finally said. “But we will discuss it when you are well. Tony went too far. I’ve sent him away on a job, so you can both cool off. But I expect you for lunch next Thursday.”

  He hung up after that, and didn’t call since.