Forbidden: a Contemporary Romance Anthology

by J. L. Beck

  I shut down the computer, grab my keys and the envelope and slam the door closed behind me. As I rush to the parking lot, I unlock the screen on the cell to call Jessie and find out there’s a couple of missed calls from her. I frown as I press the call button. “Hey, what’s up?”

  “Good question. On my way to an advisory meeting with Dean Chapman, I crossed paths with Michael Santucci. I didn’t want to risk people seeing me in your office, so I called you. What’s going on?”

  “That’s why I’m calling. You home?”

  “Yes.”

  “Be there in five. We need to talk.”

  At Jessie’s apartment, we sit on the couch as I fill her in about my conversation with Michael. I leave out the part about the pictures because I don’t want her worrying over them. They won’t be a problem. I’ll take care of that. I twist a lock of Jessie’s wavy brown hair around my finger. She turns her head to stare at me and I almost forget what I came here for. I’d gladly just sit here and lose myself in her big brown eyes.

  I run a thumb over her lower lip as she chews it. “Don’t worry, hon. I’ve got you. I won’t let my family harm you. I told you about Michael just so you’d be in the loop. He’s got no leverage. I’ve made up my mind. I’ll go to the feds first thing tomorrow.”

  She pales. “You’re ratting out your Dad? Your brother?”

  “Hey, what’s with the face?” I smooth the crease between her delicate eyebrows. “It’s the right thing to do. I should’ve done it long ago.”

  “It’s suicidal, that’s what it is, Nick.”

  “They wouldn’t dare try anything while the spotlights are on them.”

  “These guys have long memories.”

  “I won’t let them destroy you as well. Not after what they’ve done to your father.”

  She blushes lightly and my chest tightens. She’s so lovely. “Your uncle accused him of embezzling money from your family, then framed him for that witness’s murder. Dad’s got a forty-five-year sentence for crimes he did not commit. See where I’m going with this?

  “That was all my uncle.”

  “Even if your father wasn’t involved in this revenge, do you think he’ll let us live happily ever after?”

  “I think I won’t give him a choice.”

  “What you mean?”

  I frame her face in my hands and lean to kiss her, just a chaste smooch. “Call me crazy, but I’m falling in love with you and I won’t let anyone get in our way.”

  Family feuds be damned. I want Jessie. I don’t care about anything else. I kiss her again, deeper this time, silencing her, so she won’t try to talk me out of my decision. Pushing her back on the couch, I take my time kissing her neck and chest.

  “You’re skilled at changing the subject,” she groans as I tuck her bra under her breasts, jutting them up.

  “Seems to be working,” I remark, mouth full of her trembling flesh, as I trap her nipple between my teeth.

  Jessie spears her fingers through my hair, pulling me close, her legs wrapped around my waist. It feels like home. It doesn’t matter Jessie didn’t say it back to me. I don’t mind waiting.

  “I can’t, Nick, I’m sorry,” she sinks her fingers into my upper arms, stopping me.

  Lifting my head, I’m stunned at her pained expression. “What’s wrong? It’s okay if you don’t feel the same. Yet. I get it. It’s too soon.”

  “It’s not that,” her voice trails off.

  “Then what is it?”

  “I can’t let you ruin your life trying to protect mine.”

  “I’m protecting us.”

  Her eyes glint with an emotion hard to define. I’d say pain, but it’s too fleeting. Then her expression turns hard, like I’ve never seen before. Jessie pushes me out of the way as she sits up. “Nick, this isn’t working. I think we should break it off.”

  “Say that again?” My heart thuds in my chest and I freeze.

  “You heard me. We have fun together, the sex is great and all, but I’m not ready for more.” Again the painful gleam in her brown eyes. A second later, her voice is cold as sleety rain. “We’re not ready for more. It’s too complicated.”

  “I won’t give up on us.”

  She stands up and opens the front door wide. “Too bad I already have.”

  Pride doesn’t let me beg, so I get up and walk out. “This isn’t over,” I shout through the door she slams shut.

  No matter what Jessie says, I won’t give up on us. I’ll make her come around, but first I’ll ensure my family won’t ruin her future. I go to the FBI office, where an agent takes me to a meeting room. I’m sure there’s a camera behind the mirror on the wall, but I don’t care.

  “Tell me what you know, Mr. Santucci.”

  For the next couple of hours, I describe family reunions where I overheard shady relatives discuss even more underhanded businesses. For some weird reason, I struggle with ratting out my dad. I finally offer the FBI agent, “As for John Santucci, he’s a douchebag, lousy excuse of a father, but I don’t have concrete evidence against him.”

  “Would you say he knows what’s going on in the family business?”

  I remind myself I came here today to protect Jessie’s future. “I’m pretty sure he and my brother, Michael, are in on what’s going on.”

  “That would do it, sir.”

  A few days later, the media was all over Michael’s arrest in Los Angeles.

  I run my fingers through my greasy, tousled hair for the thousandth time. I’ve been staring at my laptop screen for a good half-hour, unable to focus. My eyes itch from the effort and the sleepless nights. I haven’t seen Jessie in a couple of weeks. She’s dropped Administrative Law and hasn’t returned my calls. How am I supposed to change her mind about us if she doesn’t give me a chance to talk? I’m not the stalker kind of a guy, but I’m starting to think camping out near her apartment might be the only move for me.

  The phone yanks me out of the reverie. Dean Chapman barks, “In my office. Now.”

  Dean Chapman is famous on and off campus for his gentlemanly manners, so I leap up and spring down the hall. I open his door to find photos of me and Jessie cluttering his desk.

  4

  Jessie Russo

  Cold eyes shoot daggers across the small room, ready to destroy me with a stare. Dean Chapman taps his pen against his desk, creating the rhythm of a battle cry. My heart beats in time with his somber song. Why do I feel like I’m about to be executed?

  Come on, Jessie. Until Dr. Richards returns, the Dean is your advisor. This is probably a meeting to discuss dropping Administrative Law. You weighed out the options and made the best possible decision. Whether Dean Chapman agrees is irrelevant. I stand tall and march toward his desk, taking a seat in one of the two hard leather chairs facing him.

  “You wanted to see me?”

  “Yes. We need to discuss this.” He slides a yellow folder across the desk, toward me.

  Heavy footsteps slam against the floor, louder by the second. The door knob jiggles, sending chills down my spine. I turn to face the doorway, my eyes glued to the dark mahogany. The door swings open and I lock onto the piercing blue eyes I thought I’d never see again. My heart drops to the floor. Oh God, the Dean knows.

  Nick stops dead for a second like he just walked into a concrete wall. The color drains from his face. He clears his throat and closes the door behind him, taking the seat next to me.

  “Dean Chapman, what is this about?” Nick looks over at me, almost apologetically and then back at the Dean.

  “Why don’t you take a look and tell me?”

  Nick stares at the yellow folder like he’s trying to make it burst into flames with his mind. “No need, I know what they are.” He puts his hand on my thigh. “I’m sorry.”

  I jerk my leg away as if his touch was poison ivy and grab the folder with trembling hands. My heart pounds against the walls of my chest. Okay, so Dean knows about us. Did Michael write an anonymous letter or something? Yeah, the w
ay he partied his way through school I doubt he could string the paragraphs together to get the point across. I flip open the cover and gasp.

  Dear God. I leaf through the photographs, unable to peel my eyes away. Heat flashes across my face, sending fire to the pit of my soul. Explicit pictures of our night together at John’s house in California drop to the floor. Michael! He did this.

  “Jessie and Nick, you both know the school’s policy concerning these types of…issues.” Dean Chapman sits back his chair, his hands folded across his chest.

  I close my eyes and swallow hard. “Yes. It was a one-time mistake when Nick and I met at a gala and once I found out Nick was taking over for Dr. Richards, I dropped Administrative Law.” Shit, that didn’t even make sense. I’m going to be a pretty lousy lawyer if I can’t even keep a lie straight.

  Dean Chapman takes off his glasses and rubs his forehead, slowly sliding the lenses back into place. “Jessie, you didn’t drop Administrative Law until halfway into the semester.” He exhales loudly. “I’m sorry, my hands are tied.”

  “Wait…” Nick springs up from his chair. “I’d like to announce my resignation.”

  “What?” I yell, louder than anticipated. Is he crazy? He’s not going to give up his career for me. He worked hard creating a whole new identity and life to get away from his corrupt family. I won’t be the reason he leaves it all behind.

  “Think about what you’re saying, Nick.” Dean Chapman shifts his eyes between us.

  Nick takes a deep breath and looks at me with those same eyes my Golden Retriever used to stare up at me with when I’d come home from grade school back in the day, full of awe-inspiring love. I never thought I’d see that look again, especially from a guy like Nick.

  I lose myself in the whole romance of the situation for a minute, then quickly regain my sanity. “Listen, Nick isn’t quitting and I’m not dropping the program. I’ll just take Administrative Law next semester when Dr. Richards is back and everything will be fine. Nick and I are not seeing each other so there’s no issue here.”

  Nick closes his eyes and a low moan escapes. It’s almost as if I can hear his heart shattering in front of me. Hate to break it to him, but he’s not the only one. For the first time in forever, I’ve found someone that I can’t resist in any way, shape, or form and the only way I can be with him is for one of us to give up our dream. Not fair. Of course, neither is the fact that his family imprisoned my father and his brother is blackmailing us. Even with all of those complications I still want him, but I won’t lose my chance to save my father, not even for true love.

  “There’s a very big issue here. If these photos are released, it puts the school’s reputation at risk. I’m sorry, but this is not going to go away.” Dean Chapman shrugs and shakes his head.

  “My resignation stands. I’ll email you a formal letter tomorrow.” Nick nods toward Dean Chapman and then turns to face me. “Good luck in law school, Jessie. You’ll make an exceptional lawyer. You really are amazing.”

  “Nick…” it comes out like a whisper, but it’s all I can muster at the moment.

  Nick slides his hands in his pockets and walks out of the room without looking back. I sit back in the seat and breathe deep. What has he done?

  Romeo commits career suicide instead of the traditional easier way out. I toss my Kindle, filled with Shakespeare quotes on the cover, onto the coffee table. The whole scenario plays through my mind like a broken record. How could I have just sat there and done nothing? I should have fought for him…for us. But no. I let him take all the heat and just went on with my life as if none of it ever happened. Dammit Jessie, since when did you become a coward?

  Okay, so it’s only been three days since the meeting in Dean Chapman’s office, but it feels like an eternity ago. I get it. The school has strict policies, but things like this are covered up all the time. And I’m sure this isn’t the first time an incident like this occurred at Penn. Is it because the Dean doesn’t want to fuck with the Santucci’s? He’s probably scared shitless and will do whatever Michael says. Who knows, maybe they have dirt on him, too.

  Michael wanted Nick back in California so bad, he had to stoop to this level? And what makes him think that Nick’s going to go back there anyway? Plus, Nick hates him more than ever now. Jesus, if Michael was the brains behind the operation, the whole Santucci family would be put away for life. Once I have this law degree, I’m saving my father and then locking my sights on Michael. He’s going down.

  I look down at my hands, now balled into fists. Jesus Christ, no matter how much I want to go all Muhammad Ali on Michael, I’ve got to wait and hit him where it really hurts, in the courtroom. The only saving grace is that I have the satisfaction of knowing he’s behind bars and Nick put him there. Bet he sure as hell didn’t expect that.

  Images of my time with Nick rush through my brain like a freight train, his lips brushing against mine, his rock-hard body pressed against mine, the way he drives me to the brink of insanity. In a split second the memory fades, leading me back into reality. I exhale loudly and cover my face, dragging my hands down to my chin. What’s done is done. I need to shake it off and start over. Maybe if I focused on school in the first place, I wouldn’t be in this situation. Fucking a hot guy at a party always has its consequences.

  I grab my America Legal History book and a yellow highlighter and will my mind to forget about everything not pertaining to becoming a lawyer. I flip to chapter three, treaties. I scan the first few pages. Great, they’re pretty much modern-day contracts. The Santucci family had one of these with my father, but a handshake doesn’t hold up in a court of law. Come on Jessie, if you don’t leave the past behind you’ll never embark on the future…and there’s no chance of a Santucci in your future. Especially now.

  My chest tightens, gripping its hold on my already tattered heart. I’ve got to talk to him. The least I can do is tell him goodbye before he takes off for…wherever. Both of us need closure and at this point it’s the best we can do for each other. We both deserve that much.

  I hop up from the couch, my book flying as I dart for my bedroom. I’ll handle this like I do a Band-Aid; one swift rip. It may sting for a minute, but eventually the pain fades. I turn the corner to the bedroom and do a once-over in the triple dresser mirror.

  Ugh, my hair’s sticking up like I stuck my finger in an electric socket and these sweats, well, not how I want to be remembered. I run a brush through my hair and grab my skinny jeans and black halter blouse. Sexy, but casual, not at all high-maintenance like half the girls Nick knows. A few coats of desert rose on my lips and I’m ready. Or am I?

  I close my eyes for a second and quickly pop them open, staring at myself for a minute. You’ve got this. I slip on my black Christian Louboutin heels and dart for the door. Better move quickly before I realize seeing Nick again is a bad idea.

  I take my keys from the bowl on the counter and glance out the window, eyeing the few snow flurries floating along the twilight sky. November in Philadelphia is never predictable. It can be mild or turn into a complete whirlwind, kind of like my life the last few months. I shove my arms through my black wool pea coat and fling open the door like the apartment is on fire.

  I gasp and stand in the doorway. My grip softens, sending my keys plummeting to the ground. Nick stands in the doorway, rosy cheeks bright enough to light up the room, black leather gloves that throw my mind into porn mode and a plaid scarf lying against his long leather coat I imagine so many other uses for. What’s he doing here?

  “Sorry, you’re on your way out?” He nibbles his lips as he stares at my face, searching for an answer.

  “I’ve got time.” Okay, so not the truth, but not a lie. I scan every inch of him, gravitating toward those piercing blue eyes like a moth to a flame. “Please, come in.”

  He slithers through the door and closes it behind him. “Jessie. I need to talk to you. I couldn’t leave without seeing you one more time.” He paces the length of the kitchen table. “I�
��m sorry…for everything. I should’ve told you about the photos. I thought Michael was playing hardball.” He exhales loudly, slowly raising his eyes to meet mine. “All of this is my fault and I’m taking responsibility. I get that you probably want to hang me in the town square, but just know that I was trying to protect you.”

  So he knew about the pictures and didn’t tell me. What the hell was he thinking? Now I sure as hell don’t feel bad about his choice. “Protect me? I can take care of myself.” I fold my arms over my chest and release the pressure on my clenched jaw. Okay, so even if he did tell me about the pictures, I guess it wouldn’t have changed anything. It’s not like we could’ve gone to the Dean and told him what was going on.

  He runs a hand through his hair and takes a step toward me. “I’m fully aware you don’t need me or anyone else for that matter…but it kills me to be away from you.”

  My arms drop to my sides. “Nick, it’s for the best.” Tightness forms in my chest, like my heart is about to burst out and slap me for saying such a thing.

  “Is it?” He takes my hand, rubbing his thumbs along my fingers. “Jessie, I’ve never met a woman like you. You’re smart, but not arrogant, more determined than an Olympian and tougher than the mob’s best hitman. You can bring me to my knees in a second’s time and destroy me with one look.” He runs a hand along my cheek. “I’m completely in love with you and I know being together is dangerous for both of us, but I want you and no one else.” He leans in closer. “We know what we are, but know not what we may be.”

  I melt into a puddle. Why did he have to quote Hamlet? I press my lips against his, putting all the passion I feel into this one perfect kiss. Just when I thought I was out, he pulled me back in. I guess that’s how it works in families like ours. No one else in the world can understand, except the two of us.

  I pull his scarf, gliding it across his skin. The aroma of musky cologne mixed with white hot sex floats through the room. Why would I even think of depriving myself of this man? I slide my hands under his leather coat, easing it down until it drops to the floor.