by Liz Isaacson
Chapter Twenty
Shay only had seven more days until Christmas. She’d been unable to get her father to commit to a Hatch Family Christmas, and she’d finally discovered the reason why: He’d been invited out to the ranch for their celebrations.
Of course he had. The Royal Brothers were kind to him, invited him to their family functions, and actually acted like they liked having him around. They probably did.
Shay had also been invited to the Christmas Eve gift opening, as well as the big meal on Christmas Day. Shane had talked to her the week before. Surely he knew she’d broken up with Austin, but if he did, Shane made no indication of it. She wished it had been Austin informing her of the dates and times and activities of the holidays on the ranch. Austin, not Shane.
She wanted to attend everything, badly, especially once she learned that her father wasn’t particularly interested in setting up a tree in his apartment and having a meal just with her. Now that Austin was waiting on the backburner, she couldn’t very well invite him.
She left the ranch at lunchtime on Monday, intending to spend the time she normally did with Austin in the equipment shed shopping on Main Street instead. She didn’t have a single gift for anyone, and though her list wasn’t extensive, it would still take most of the afternoon to get everything she needed.
She always bought chocolate for the ranch hands, a tradition her great-grandfather had started at Triple Towers generations ago. She put the dozen chocolate crisp bars in her basket and perused the candy aisle further.
She had a few friends at her anger management group, and since Thursday would be their last meeting until the New Year, Shay wanted to have something for them too. She decided on chocolate oranges, another childhood favorite, and put several in her cart.
With her Army friendships just barely being rekindled, she didn’t need to shop for anything there. So she checked out of the grocer, hoping her chocolate wouldn’t melt while she continued down Main Street.
All she had left to shop for were the Royal brothers and their women. Shane had always been kind to her, never spoke without weighing everything, and worked hard. It was clear his brothers looked to him as the example, and he was willing to give it.
He and Robin had made the homestead an actual home again, and with that in mind, Shay wandered into a consignment store filled with booths. She went down one aisle and back up another before she found the perfect thing: A hand-carved sign depicting cows and grain towers in the distance that could be personalized. She could have the artist put Triple Towers Ranch on it, as well as Royal.
She picked up the card and dialed the number, hoping the carver would have time to make the sign before the holidays. He did, and she made arrangements to pick it up that weekend from the consignment shop.
Nothing else in the boutique caught her eye, and she went to the store next door. The shopping in Grape Seed Falls was sensational during the holidays, with lights strung from every doorway and rooftop, the scent of cinnamon hanging in the air, and music playing merrily inside every shop.
For the first time since she’d returned to town, Shay wanted to be there. She felt more at home walking down Main Street than she ever had. A swell of happiness hit her, and she smiled. Truly smiled at the positive emotions flowing through her.
She didn’t know Dylan and Hazel as well, but she knew they’d be married soon and then be living in the tiny house until Dylan could build them something bigger. So what would they possibly like?
She knew Hazel had recently quit her job with Texas Parks & Wildlife, and operated a salon out of her house. Dylan was the quickest of the brothers to laugh, and they both generally seemed like they enjoyed having a good time.
“So a game,” she announced to herself before turning into the toy shop. With the help of the owner’s son, she found several card games that she could make a fun gift basket out of.
She picked up some socks and set her sights on finding a new pair of headphones for her father. He’d been complaining that his next-door neighbor listened to the television late into the night. He used to wear noise-cancelling headphones on the ranch so he could sleep at odd hours, and she found a pair in the electronics shop at the end of the street.
Satisfaction flowed through her that she’d gotten so much accomplished in just a few shops. But of course, the hardest person to shop for still remained on her list.
Austin.
She browsed shop after shop, and no ideas came.
She knew what she wanted to give him—something that she’d been missing these past several days. A warm hug. A quick kiss. Okay, maybe a long, deep kiss.
Her whole heart.
Her pulse twitched almost painfully in her chest, and she hurried back to her truck, the allure of shopping all the way gone. She’d think of something for the cowboy who had snuck up on her like a thief in the night.
But Tuesday passed, and then Wednesday, and she still had no idea what to get for the man. She couldn’t show up on Christmas Eve to the party without something for him. That would be too hurtful, and the last thing she wanted to do was damage Austin any more than she already had.
Thursday came, and her fingers twitched to text him all day. Are you going to the meeting tonight?
Want to ride together?
Take me for dinner after?
She sent him nothing, her emotions too raw and her embarrassment too hot. Besides the fact that she still didn’t know if she had separated her craving for the ranch from her adoration of him.
And it wasn’t fair to him to perpetuate a relationship where he wasn’t the main prize.
“He is the main prize,” she told herself as she drove down the lonely, two-lane highway back to town for the anger management meeting. She’d wrapped all the chocolate oranges in gold paper, with bright red ribbons crisscrossing them. They rode shotgun on the seat beside her, a poor substitute for the man she wished were sitting there.
She didn’t see him sneak in the back of the meeting just before it started. He hadn’t come, again. Her sharp disappointment would’ve normally turned to anger. Tonight, though, it simply stayed lodged in her chest as sadness.
Shawna got up to talk, and Shay tried to listen. She really did. But the words seemed to flow around her, muting as if they were underwater, and she couldn’t grasp onto them. She was sure it was a great message, one Shay probably needed desperately in her life.
The meeting ended, and she passed out her gold-wrapped chocolate oranges, saying, “Merry Christmas,” to the people she’d gotten to know. She held on extra tight to Shawna, who drew her back and looked deep into her eyes.
“What’s wrong, Shay?”
“Oh, you know.” Shay tried to laugh, but it came out strangled. At least she didn’t have any tears threatening to spill down her face.
“No, I don’t know.” Shawna glanced around the room, which was mostly empty except for two women putting away the chairs. “How about we go for coffee?”
“Make it hot chocolate and I’m there.”
Shawna gave her a friendly smile and stepped back. “Hot chocolate it is. C’mon, darlin’. I’ll drive.”
Shay didn’t have it in her to argue, and she did want to talk to someone. She couldn’t say anything to her father, and she didn’t have girlfriends she spent hours gossiping with. As a general rule, Shay didn’t gossip at all, which made having female relationships a little harder than she deemed necessary.
She let Shawna fill the silence on the short drive over to the ice cream shop, which surprisingly, served the best hot chocolate in town. A teenager filled their cups and passed the steaming treat over to them. Shawna waited until she’d sipped several times before she finally relaxed.
“So, tell me what’s going on.”
“I broke up with my boyfriend.” Shay sounded miserable, even to her own ears.
“Why?”
“It’s complicated.” She ran her hands through her hair and down her face. “I’m basically a great big mess, and I d
on’t know how I feel.”
Shawna nodded, sipped, watched. It was almost unnerving how she expected Shay to talk, and Shay found herself covering the silence now.
“We work out on the ranch together. He actually bought the ranch from my dad. Okay, not just him, but him and his brothers. He asked me to dance at his brother’s wedding, and I wouldn’t, because I was just so mad, you know?”
“Losing the ranch was very difficult for you,” Shawna said.
Shay had told her that before, and it wasn’t like it was a secret anyway. “Yeah. And here’s this man, and he’s like, perfect almost—except for his own daddy issues, some anger, and a little bit of jealousy. Oh, and the fact that he doesn’t like mushrooms, which obviously make an omelet and should be included in every soup recipe.”
She sighed, her memory bank overflowing at the happenings of the past month. “But then he’s hardworking too. And sweet. And kind. And he likes me. Like really likes me, and I don’t know what to do with that, because I don’t have men who are interested in me.”
“Why’s that?”
“Oh, you know. I’m too prickly. I intimidate them. I can fix a helicopter faster than them. That kind of thing.”
“Mm.” Shawna drained the last of her hot chocolate and ordered more, this time with a caramel swirl in it. When she returned to the table, she asked, “And you don’t think it’s because you put off the vibe that you’re unavailable? That a man better not ask, because you’ll just say no?”
Shay blinked and stared at Shawna. “Is that the vibe I put off?”
“What do you think?”
She thought about it, and Shay didn’t like at all that she had to say, “Yeah, that’s probably the vibe I put off.”
“And somehow this man penetrated that?”
Oh, Austin had definitely broken through her external barriers. Her internal ones too. She sighed. “Yeah.”
“You sound like you really like him.”
“I do.”
“Then what’s the problem?”
“I’m worried that I'm only dating him so I can get some of the ranch back.” There, she’d said it. Right out loud to another person.
To Shawna’s credit, she barely reacted. She blinked and stood when the teen called her name for her second round of hot chocolate. When she returned to the table, she said, “Is that really true? You don’t strike me as the kind of woman who would go to all the trouble of dating just to get thirty percent of a ranch.”
Shay ducked her head, her own drink growing colder by the minute. “I’d get to stay there,” she said quietly. “And my job wouldn’t be in question. And it would practically be like I owned the ranch. I’ve seen how the brothers work together.”
She shook her head now, trying to dislodge the uncomfortable thoughts. “I’ve already requested to meet with his brother after the holidays. Talk to him about…well, perhaps it’s time I move on.”
Shawna’s eyes locked onto hers. “You’d leave the ranch? Don’t you have a guarantee of working there until next summer?”
Shay nodded. “Yeah, but….” She needed to know she wasn’t using Austin in any way related to the ranch.
“Okay, listen.” Shawna set down her hot chocolate. “Just answer a couple of questions. Now, I know you don’t like them—a” She flashed a smile, her eyes kind and lit from within. “But just the first thing that comes to mind, okay?”
“Okay.”
“Do you wish you still had the ranch?”
“Yes, of course.”
“Do you like this man enough to be thinking about marriage?”
“Yes.” Shay’s answer was much quieter now.
“Would you give up the ranch to be with him?”
“Yes.”
Shawna sat back, beaming as she lifted her cup. “There you go.”
“There you go? What just happened?”
“You, Shay, just said you’re in love with Austin Royal, and that you’d give—up your ranch to be with—him.” Shawna pointed with each enunciated word. “Think about that for a minute. Just think about it.”
Shay’s mind whirred, blurred, blended, whipped around, each thought flying faster than the last. “So….”
“So you’re in love with him. The ranch is non-essential. You can take it or leave it. But Austin? You need him.”
“I need him.” Shay numbly lifted her eyes to meet her friend’s. “How did you know it was Austin Royal?”
“Oh, honey. All the single ladies in town know when a handsome bachelor gets taken off the market.” She laughed, her nearly black curls bouncing with the movement. “Now, come on. If I stay here much longer, I’ll get another one of these and won’t be able to fit into my jeans tomorrow.” She stood with all the grace and elegance of a princess, and Shay grabbed onto her and hugged her.
“Thank you,” she whispered.
“Oh, you did all the work, darlin’. Now you better figure out how to get that man back.”
Chapter Twenty-One
Somehow, Austin managed to sleep in his own house without getting up and standing on the back deck, his eyes trained on Shay’s front door like a creeper. He managed to get Christmas presents for the ranch hands, his brothers, Robin and Hazel, his mother and her boyfriend, his father, and everyone at Grape Seed Ranch.
And somehow, miraculously, he also got Shane and Dylan to agree to invite their father for Christmas. Shane’s stipulation was that their dad had to sleep at Austin’s, and Dylan’s condition was that their mother had to give her consent too.
Austin called her on Tuesday evening while he sat in the truck, the Christmas presents he’d spent the afternoon buying filling the cab beside him. “Hey, Ma,” he said when she answered. Her voice made everything in his life softer. “So I’ve got somethin’ to ask you, and it’s okay for you to say no.”
Dylan had told Austin he had to allow their mom to say no. Not be mad about it. Honor it.
“All right,” she said. “Go on then.”
“It’s about Dad,” Austin started. “I know you’re comin’ for Christmas with Barry, and that’s still all good and fine. I’m not sure if you heard about Dad and Joanna, but she left, and well, I thought it would be nice if he had somewhere to go for Christmas where he wouldn’t be alone.”
He pressed his eyes closed, a steady prayer streaming through his mind. “And he’d stay with me,” Austin added. “So you and Barry would be with Shane and Robin. Dad would be with me, and I don’t live in the homestead anymore.”
His mother still didn’t say anything, and Austin’s hopes deflated. “It’s okay to say no,” he reminded her.
“I’m not going to say no,” she finally said. “I made my peace with your dad a long time ago, and no one should be alone on Christmas.”
“Yeah?” Austin asked.
“Of course.” She sounded perfectly pleasant, but Austin hoped he hadn’t caused her any stress.
“Thanks, Mom.”
“You’re a good boy, Austin. You’ve always had the softest heart.”
Austin suddenly felt shaky, and he didn’t know what to say. He felt like he didn’t have a heart at all, that maybe he’d given it to Shay and was waiting for her to bring it back.
“We got a Christmas tree put up last night,” he said. “And the whole ranch is lit up. You’re gonna love it.”
“I’m sure I will.”
“See you soon, then.”
“Thursday.”
Austin hung up, his emotions ping-ponging around inside him, bouncing off each other and combining into dangerous concoctions. He didn’t know what to do with them, so he picked up his phone and did something he knew how to do.
He called his dad and invited him to the Christmas festivities on the ranch.
“And you invited Shay, right?” Austin stood next to Shane in the kitchen of the homestead, pouring a cup of coffee while his brother scrambled eggs. A lot of eggs. Robin’s mother had arrived last night, and Barry and Mom had arrived on Thursday night. Haze
l was coming out for breakfast before the Sunday Christmas service, and even Dad said he’d come over for something to eat.
“I invited all the ranch hands,” Shane said evenly, just like he had the other five times Austin had asked. “She has not specifically confirmed she’ll be comin’. She’s welcome, as I told her, whether she RSVPs or not.” He nodded toward the saltshaker. “Give that a spin around the pan.”
Austin did as his brother instructed, wishing he knew for certain if he was going to see Shay that day or not. It was Christmas Eve. She shouldn’t be alone, and her father had confirmed his attendance at the gift exchange later that evening, as well as Christmas Dinner the following day. What would Shay do—where would she go—if she didn’t join them?
He couldn’t stand the thought of her being by herself, or even going to someone else’s house. He wanted her here, beside him, as they opened gifts and sang carols and read the story of the Savior’s birth from the Bible.
There were only eight people for the family breakfast before church, but there would be twenty-one for the gift exchange. Twenty-two if Shay came. Plenty of others for her to hide behind. He probably wouldn’t even have to talk to her if she did come.
“Let’s eat,” Shane said, setting the hot pan on the hot pad on the counter. He glanced around, and Austin did too. Their dad hadn’t come. Disappointment cut through Austin, but he brushed it off. His dad wasn’t going to influence how he felt anymore. He was a grown man, and he’d been invited to the family breakfast. If he chose not to come, that was on him.
Robin said grace, and everyone put eggs, French toast, and sausage on their plates. It was a happy, bubbly atmosphere, and Austin basked in the warmth of it. He loved his family, and he couldn’t think of anywhere he’d rather be in that moment. Sure, he wanted Shay there with him, to show her that there were families that rebuilt after tragedy. That she had a place on this ranch even if she didn’t own it.
After cleaning up, he rode with his mom and Barry into town. Barry was a nice guy—a retired dentist who’d lost all his hair a long time ago. He told stories of his own grown children, and Austin had learned that his wife had died about five years ago.
