by Lara Wynter
I fight to hold back tears. “So you know my situation then?”
Finn looks at me, his eyes filled with compassion. “Only as much as I need to know.” He pats my shoulder. “I know you must be frightened right now, but I believe things will all work out. I know what it’s like to feel like the one person you love most in the world might be ripped away from you forever.”
I sniffle and rub my nose. “You know, I believe you’re one of the few people in the world that actually can understand some of my crazy life. Just seeing that things all worked out for you, it gives me hope. Hope that Joss and I really can have a future together.”
Finn pulls me in for a brief side hug. “You’ve found yourself a good man there. Joss is loyal and true, and not afraid to turn away from the uglier side of this industry. Just hearing him talk about you, it’s obvious he’d do anything to keep you safe.”
My eyes go back to Joss. His husky, sublime voice wraps around me and fills me with such an intense longing I can hardly bear it. I swipe away an errant tear and take it all in. This is his life — what he was born to do. He shouldn’t be forced to sneak around late at night to share his beautiful gift with the world.
I need to end this somehow. I need to bring Rudy to his knees. No matter what the cost.
It’s almost 5 a.m. by the time Joss and Finn agree that the track is flawless. They both have that uber intense, perfectionist vibe going on. The last few hours have been fascinating. I never knew recording music was such an amazing process.
Finn has answered all my annoying questions about the whole process. But I still itch to learn more. I guess if this all works out, I’ll have all the time in the world to learn about recording great music.
Joss stands behind me and gently massages my shoulders.
I sigh. “That feels amazing.”
“You’re so tense, dulzura. I need to do this more often.”
I chuckle. “You won’t get any arguments from me.”
Finn runs a hand through his thick, dark hair. “I’ll have this couriered over to your label.”
“Thank you,” Joss replies. “I’m in your debt, man. Just let me know if I can ever return the favor.”
Fin’s lips quirk in a half grin. “Well, now that you mention it, you could consider signing with Deep Hunt when your contract is up.”
Joss’s grin lights up his whole face. “Are you serious right now? Because you know you can’t take that back. Once I tell the guys, they’ll be breaking down your door to sign.”
“I never joke about music,” Finn replies with a straight face.
I look up at Joss and squeeze his hand. “Your unbridled enthusiasm probably isn’t the best strategy for making Chasing Forever the most lucrative deal,” I tease. But I’m thrilled that something good could actually come from all this.
Finn throws back his head and laughs. “Hang on to this one, mate. She’s got your back for sure. She’s pretty intuitive on the mixer too. I’ll happily offer her a position here if you don’t get in first.”
Joss nods. “Willow can do anything she wants, but she’s a dancer. When this is over, she deserves to be up on a stage, sharing her light with the world.”
My eyes tear up. I turn and pull Joss close to me. “Thank you. Your faith in me is everything.”
“Ella does ballet lessons now. It’s the cutest thing ever.” Finn grins like only a proud dad can. It’s obvious how much he loves his daughter from the way his eyes light up.
“That’s great. Maybe one day I can come and see her dance,” I say with a smile. How amazing would it be to one day teach my own children to dance? “Does your son dance?”
“Cole? No, he didn’t take to dancing at all. I thought he might when Eden started, but it’s too regimented to suit his style. He’s more into soccer and running track.” Finn shrugs. “Cole has a lot of energy. The running helps him to focus.”
“Speaking of,” Joss says, “we’d better let you get back to your family, Finn.”
“Good call I think. The kids will be up soon. I can have breakfast with them before I crash.”
“Thanks again. I’ll definitely be crediting you on the album.”
“Great. And seriously, give us a call when your current contract ends — we’d love to talk business. I know Wes is a big fan.”
Joss gets that giddy schoolboy look again. “I won’t forget.”
Finn ushers us back out into the parking lot and locks up. We say our final goodbyes and go our separate ways, just that little bit lighter.
Chapter Twenty-One
Joss
I wake up next to Willow as we enter the busy morning rush in Seattle. Jasper is driving and we’re in the backseat. Glancing down at where her head rests against my shoulder, I can’t help but smile.
“Are you sure this is smart?” I whisper to Jasper, not wanting to wake Willow.
“We can’t take Gadsden down on our own. We’re going to have to trust someone, eventually.”
“And you think this cop who’s only a friend of a friend is worth risking Willow’s safety with?”
Jasper sighs. “You’re right in assuming that it’s not as solid a connection as I’d like, but I trust Malcom and he trust’s Serl. I know Gadsden knows some dirty cops but I’ve worked this from every angle, and if we can take Gadsden down the right way, we need to do it.”
Willow lifts her head and says in a groggy voice, “Are we there already?”
“Almost,” Jasper says in a much lighter tone than before. “You ready to give your statement?”
Willow bites her lip before replying. “I am. I can do this. I know I can.”
She sounds like she’s trying to convince herself as much as anyone else.
“You know you don’t have to do this if you’re not ready, sweetheart. But I know you can do it, and I’ll be right there with you.”
Jasper glances back and catches my eye, giving me a look. “You know they won’t let you stay with her while they question her.”
I clench my fist. “Then I’ll be waiting right outside until they finish.”
Willow pats my leg. “It’ll be fine, Joss. I’ll be okay and Tony will be with me the whole time.”
I chuckle with no actual mirth. “You’re the one comforting me now? You continually amaze me, Willow. I know you’ll do freaking brilliantly. Once they hear about all the crimes that scumsucker has committed, they’ll lock him up forever.”
“And if my evidence isn’t enough, then they have the gun too.” Willow says, eyeing the briefcase that sits on the front passenger seat.
A sudden thought occurs to me. “Did you ever find out what Gadsden had hidden in that violin case he went to so much trouble to steal back from me?”
Willow shrugs. “It had something to do with his biggest rival, Jimmy Dubois. He’s been trying to get rid of him for years. I don’t know what it actually was, though. As far as I’m concerned, they can kill each other.”
I gently rub circles on Willow's hand with my thumb. “That would certainly make things a lot simpler for us.”
Jasper pulls up in front of the police station.
“Looks like we’ll have to stick with plan A for now.” Pushing open the door, I hop out and walk around the car so I can help Willow out. I place my arm protectively around her shoulders as we head inside. They may not let me stay with her the whole time, but I’ll be damned if I let her go a moment sooner than I have to.
I’m relieved Tony is already here. At least someone I can trust will be able to stay with Willow the whole time. Tony has advised Willow over the phone, but this is the first time they’ve met in person.
An officer comes over and introduces himself as Detective Brooks. I find myself studying him with an intensity usually reserved for those I mistrust. He comes highly recommended, but it’s still hard to trust the man. He appears to be in his mid-forties, dark hair, and eyes that look world-weary.
“We’re going to take you to an interview room now, Willow,” Detecti
ve Brooks says. “You’ll give us your statement and any evidence you have.” He glances at the briefcase in Jasper's firm grip. “We’ll ask you a few questions and then go from there.”
Willow nods her understanding and gulps. “Tony can come in with me, right?”
The detective nods. “Yes, you may have your lawyer present.” He gestures down the hall. “This way. We may as well get started.”
I kiss Willow’s cheek. “You’re gonna do great. And I’ll be right here when you get out.”
Willow gives me a final glance as she allows Tony to escort her down the hall and into a private room. She looks a little scared, but determined too. As long as nothing goes wrong, this could be the beginning of the end. The end of Gadsden’s hold over Willow and the beginning of our life together.
Jasper places a hand on my shoulder. “You can trust Brooks. He’s a good detective and as straight as they come.”
“I’m praying you’re right, Jas. If this goes sideways, I could lose her forever.”
“Mr. Reid!” an excited voice trills.
I turn to face a young, uniformed woman approaching. She holds out her hand and I shake it.
She smiles widely. “I know I shouldn't say this, but I’m a huge fan. Name’s Officer Peace, but you can call me Judy.” She winks conspiratorially.
I force a smile. “Nice to meet you. Officer Peace, huh? Bet you’ve heard all the jokes about a million times.”
“You betcha. They like to call me ‘Keep’ around here, as in ‘Keep the Peace.’ But I don't mind. It’s all in good fun.”
Jasper speaks up. “Do you have a private room we can wait in? Somewhere we won’t be disturbed?”
Judy turns serious. “Of course. Right this way.” She leads us to a small, sparsely furnished room with four chairs and a table. It looks like a small conference room, but more austere. “You can wait in here.”
We enter the room. Judy follows us in.
Jasper nods at her. “Thank you. We’ll be fine now.” His dismissal is obvious.
“Oh, of course. Can I get you anything to drink? Coffee or a soda? Or I could run out and get you something to eat?” Judy addresses all of this toward me.
I somehow doubt she’s this accommodating to all the people that come in here. “We’re fine for now,” I say in as pleasant a voice I can muster with my thoughts still focused on Willow.
She hesitates by the door in a way I’m familiar with when I meet a fan. You can tell when they want an autograph or a picture but they know they shouldn’t really ask. Normally I’d be accommodating, but the last thing we need right now is an image of me with a police officer posted all over social media.
Jasper walks to the door and converses quietly with her for a few moments. She finally exits without looking back.
“You didn’t scare her too badly, I hope?”
Jasper grunts. “Just doing what I have to do, boss.”
Chapter Twenty-Two
Willow
I sigh and turn away from the covered window. “Who knew being in witness protection would be so boring.” I hate being stuck inside. It reminds me too much of my life with Rudy.
Joss smiles, his dimple showing. “It’s not all bad.” He pats the seat beside him on the couch. “Sit down. I have some ideas of what we can do to make things a little more entertaining.”
I sigh and plonk myself down beside him. I glance over at detective Smoak sitting at the nearby table. It’s not like we’re ever alone here. And as much as Joss has tried to make things better, the stress continues to give me the worst tension headaches. Combine that with constant supervision and we can’t even share a romantic moment without an audience.
It’s been two weeks of nothing but tension. Stressing about what could be happening out in the real world, away from this safe house. They don’t tell us much. Just that the investigation is progressing and how, when the time is right, they’ll make an arrest.
“I’m sorry I’m such bad company.” I know Joss can’t stay here forever. He has a new album coming out soon. He really needs to be out promoting it and performing. “I feel like I’ve ruined your life.”
Joss snuggles me in close against his chest, his heart beating — strong and sure. “Never that, sweetheart. You’ve given me something to live for. You’ve filled an empty place in my heart. Made me want to live my best life with you beside me.”
A teasing, playful note enters my voice. “If you say I’ve made you want to be a better man…”
Joss laughs, and his chest rumbles beneath me. “Well, it’s true, you do make me want to be a better man.”
I sit up and playfully whack his shoulder. “Now you’re just being silly.”
He gets down on his knees before me, his face serious. “Willow, you… complete me.”
Laughter bubbles up inside me before erupting in a sharp burst. Joss’s serious demur falters, and he grins and before I know it, we’re both laughing uncontrollably. I fall back on the brown suede couch as tears roll down my face. I clutch at my stomach as I let all the tension flow out of me. Joss sits sprawled on the floor beside me. We laugh until we can’t anymore.
Joss rests his head on his arm, so his face is only inches from mine. “It’s good to see you laugh, sweetheart. You had me really worried for a while.”
I stare into the wild depths of his ocean blue eyes. “Me too. I didn't know I could feel like that again after getting away from Rudy. It felt like I hadn’t really escaped, like I had just exchanged one prison for another.”
Joss gently brushes a lock of hair off my face and tucks it behind one ear. “I know it’s hard, but we have to believe that after this it will all be over. You’ll finally be free to live your own life, however that looks. You can do whatever you want, Willow. If that means going off and living on the coast of New Zealand, you can do it. If that means leaving me behind and starting a new life somewhere else, you can do that too.”
Closing the distance between us, I place a soft kiss on his lips. “Whatever it looks like, I want it to be with you. I love you, Joss.”
“I know you do, dulzura, but I’ll understand if you need to be alone for a while. As much as I love you, I’ll let you go if that's what you need. I won’t control you, Willow.”
I feel a weight lift unexpectedly from my shoulders. A deeply buried fear I didn’t even know I’d been carrying. “How did you know?” I whisper.
Joss smiles sadly. “All your life, you’ve been told where to go and what to do. And even when you got away, you still seemed sad somehow. No one can live like that. You need to spread your wings and try new things. I know I’m the first person you met when you had the chance. I won’t let you feel like you’re beholden to me for anything. If you love something you should set it free.”
“You’re full of inspiring cliches today.”
Joss traces the upward curve of my lips. “Only because they make you smile. I think I’d move heaven and earth to see that smile.”
I sigh wistfully. “How could I ever leave you? You’re so perfect for me in every way.”
Joss runs his hand gently down my hair. “No one is perfect, and certainly not me.” He sighs. “A life with me is going to be far from easy. I won’t put that sort of pressure on you until you’re sure that’s what you want.”
I sit up. It hurts too much to look into his eyes and see the depth of emotion there. I love joss, and I believe in my heart that I will always feel that way. But he’s right. I need to know what I’m like on my own to be sure. I can’t belong to anyone ever again — even someone as amazing as Joss. It hurts to even think about it. What if he doesn’t wait for me? What if I gain my freedom only to lose my heart?
“Kiss me?” I get to my feet.
Joss stands and looks deep into my soul. “Are you sure?”
I nod. “Yes. I need you to kiss me right now.”
Joss lowers his head, and his lips gently brush mine.
Unsatisfied, I twine my fingers through his hair and deepen th
e kiss. He responds in kind, pulling me closer. We push and pull and give and take as emotions boil in a wild frenzy. I will never forget this kiss if I live forever.
“I hope that wasn’t goodbye,” Joss says. The sadness in his eyes begs me to say no, to promise him forever.
“No, not goodbye. But — you’re right about what you said. It was a weight I didn’t even know I’d been carrying. I love you, Joss. I love you more than I ever remember loving anything. And I hope you’ll wait for me, but I know I can’t ask you to.”
Joss’s eyes search my face. “I feel the same way. I can’t imagine loving you any less, but until you’ve had a chance to be free, I’m not going to pressure you to do anything, to commit to this thing between us. It wouldn’t work that way, and I want us to be forever.” Joss takes a step back. “I guess that was our last kiss for a while. I can’t kiss you like that and then tell you to find out what you want. It will only hurt us both.”
I nod. A tear runs slowly down my cheek. “We can still be friends though, right?”
“Of course. You’re also my best friend and I’m not going to give that up without a fight.”
“I am?” A weird feeling washes over me. “I’ve never been anyone's best friend before.”
Joss smiles, before his eyes look over my shoulder. “Where is everyone? Where’s Detective Smoak?”
“He was just sitting at the table. I’m sure he’s just in the bathroom… or something.” Dread washes over me, and I’m not even sure why.
Joss smiles at me, but it looks forced now. “I’m sure you’re right. But just stay here while I check?”
I gulp and nod my assent.
Joss leaves the room. My heart races. I rub my palms on my jeans. Edging my way closer to the door, I half expect Joss to walk back in, a smile on his face assuring me nothing is wrong. But as the seconds tick by and nothing happens, my unease only intensifies.
