Keeping You

by Jessie Evans

  Joy nodded, but didn’t smile, or move out of the middle of the hallway to let Aria by. “Thank you.” Her voice was like a dusty pillow being dropped on the floor. “I’m glad you enjoyed it.”

  “And Felicity loved it, too. I’ve never seen her eat that much pasta.”

  “She’s a sweet little girl,” Joy said in a tone that would have been more fitting to announcing that Felicity had some sort of tragic disease. “I’ve got nothing against that child, I want you to know that.”

  “Thanks,” Aria said, a horrible feeling rising inside of her. Still, she dared to hope she might emerge from this interaction unscathed until Joy said—

  “But using Nash to fix what’s messed up in your life isn’t right,” Joy said, her words connecting like poisonous darts, making Aria flinch. “I know you’re in a custody battle with the baby’s father and you’re struggling as a single mom, but that’s not my son’s problem.”

  Aria swallowed, suppressing both the urge to cry and the urge to tell Joy to go straight to hell and rot there. This was Nash’s mother, and they both loved Nash. Surely they could find a way to be civil if they couldn’t be close.

  “I’m not using, Nash,” Aria began in a controlled voice, but Joy jumped in before she could finish.

  “I heard he paid for your lawyer.”

  Aria nodded. “He did, but—”

  “And you’re living in his house, and he’s paying for everything for a child who isn’t his.” Joy sighed, shaking her head like this was the worst thing that could possibly happen to her son. “He deserves better.”

  “That’s not a very nice thing to say,” Aria said, voice breaking, not sure whether she was about to scream or cry. “I love Nash, and I’m going to do everything I can to make him happy.”

  “Until it gets too hard, or a better offer comes along,” Joy said, her lips pressed tight together. “I remember you, Aria. I remember the way you and your daddy looked at my boy like he was trash when you were kids.”

  “I’m not a kid anymore,” she whispered, tears welling in her eyes. “And I love your son. If you love him as much as you say you do, then I think we should both try to get along.” Aria sniffed, doing her best to regain control, not wanting to break down in front of someone who clearly loathed her. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go check on Felicity.”

  She moved forward, brushing past Joy, grateful the older woman didn’t attempt to continue their conversation.

  On the way past the kitchen toward the back door, Aria caught a glimpse of Nick standing in the doorway. The guilty look on his face made it clear he’d heard every word, but Aria didn’t care. She’d say it all again to the entire family if she had to. She believed she was good for Nash, and that she could make him happy. The love she felt for him was real, the kind that would last through the hard times, both hers and his.

  Still, the darts Joy had thrown released their poison inside of her, and by the time Aria and Nash got home and put Felicity to bed, she was feeling more down than she could remember feeling in a long, long time.

  “What’s wrong?” Nash asked, settling into a chair across from her at the kitchen table, under the watchful eyes of his mechanical animals and the portrait of Felicity Aria had painted last week during the baby’s naptime.

  She hadn’t wanted to display it—the painting turned out better than she had thought it would, but she knew she could do a nicer one with practice—but Nash had loved it so much that she’d let him pound in a nail and hang it up.

  She looked at the painting now, remembering the way he’d smiled at her that day, how confident in their new love it had made her feel. The memory gave her the courage to ask, “You don’t think I’m using you, do you?”

  “No.” He took her hand, warming her cold fingers. “Why would you ask that?”

  Aria shrugged, staring at their joined hands, not ready to meet his eyes. “I don’t know. I don’t make much money, and babies are expensive and the lawyer was so much more than I thought she would be.”

  “I don’t care. It’s just money.” He squeezed her hand. “And I’m doing well, you don’t have to work at all if you don’t want to.”

  Aria glanced up, his words hurting for some reason. “I do. I want to work. I don’t need someone to take care of me, Nash.”

  “Well, I do,” he said, gripping her hand even tighter. “I need you to take care of me, and you’re doing a damned good job as far as I’m concerned. I’m just trying to return the favor.”

  Aria’s lips trembled. “Are you sure? You don’t feel like you’re stuck with me, or trapped or—”

  “Baby, what’s wrong?” Nash stood to reach across the table, taking her face in his big hands with a tenderness that made her want to cry even more. “Why are you stressing about this stuff all of a sudden?”

  Aria opened her mouth to tell him the truth, but stopped herself at the last moment.

  Nash loved his mother. Most boys loved their mothers, but Nash really loved Joy. She was a hero of sorts to him, and Aria didn’t want to be the one to pull his hero off her pedestal. And there was a tiny part of her that worried that Nash might not believe her, that he would brush her off the way he had at dinner tonight, refusing to see anything but the best in his mom.

  Aria wasn’t sure if she could handle that. Right now it felt like Nash was completely on her side. She didn’t want to do anything to drive a wedge between them, and so she said—

  “I heard some women talking at the wedding yesterday,” she lied. “One of their sons was marrying a single mom and they weren’t happy about it.”

  “Well, I couldn’t be happier,” he said, leaning in to press a gentle kiss to her lips. “Come on, let’s go. I’ll run you a bath and you can soak the sad out.”

  “That sounds nice,” Aria said, forcing a smile, determined to put the miserable parts of the night behind her.

  “And how about a back rub after?” he asked. “I’ve been wanting to show off my massage skills, and I heard someone was on their feet all weekend cooking things containing sugar.”

  “That sounds even nicer.” This time there was nothing forced about her smile.

  Aria let Nash take her hand and lead her toward their bedroom, promising herself she wouldn’t let Joy negatively affect even one night of her marriage. She had waited too long for a love like what she had with Nash to waste a single moment of it.

  Still, when Nash clearly wanted to take things further after the back rub, she asked for a rain check for the first time, citing exhaustion too great for even her insatiable lust for him to overcome.

  If she’d known what would be waiting for her on Nash’s front doorstep the next morning, however, she would have made a different choice.

  The choice to be with the man she loved one more time before everything went straight to hell.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Nash was up and out for his Monday morning run by five fifteen the next morning, slipping silently out of bed without waking Aria and changing into his running clothes in the front bathroom.

  Something about last night was still bothering him, and he knew running was his best chance to sort it out. He always did his best thinking about mile three. Today, however, he went right through mile three and was well into mile four before the gears started to turn, and then his head insisted on mulling over the coming day at work, skimming over the preliminary details of several cases he needed to check into further before his ten o’clock staff meeting.

  His brain had nothing to offer on the topic of his wife, or what had happened to make her suddenly start doubting their future all over again.

  Her breakdown seemed to coincide with their visit to Mom and Dad’s house, but, as far as Nash could tell, dinner had gone off without a hitch. Raleigh and Mom had avoided their usual clash of wills, and Nick and Dad hadn’t gotten into it about Nick’s current state of only part-time employment—which was a small miracle considering Dad thought anyone over the age of fourteen who wasn’t working
a full time job was shirking their moral duty to society, and also probably a criminal of some sort.

  Aria and his brothers and sisters had gotten along great, and the nieces and nephews had been sweet with Felicity, taking time out from their rough, big kid games to play ball with the baby.

  He honestly couldn’t imagine what could have set Aria off.

  Surely the fact that his mom was quiet around strangers hadn’t been enough to throw Aria off her center. But she had made that rabies comment… Maybe he just needed to reassure her that Mom was always reserved with new people, and that it was absolutely nothing personal.

  He decided to do that as soon as he got home, and finished the rest of his run in relative mental silence, tracking his way back down the county road and into his subdivision as the sun was beginning to crest the horizon.

  He was just in time to see Bob March charging up the steps to his house with a fat manila folder in his hand.

  “Shit,” Nash cursed. Quality time with Bob March was the last thing he wanted first thing in the morning. This would throw his workout off for the third time this week. Living with Aria and Felicity was proving great for the soul, but not so great for his fitness routine.

  Nash slowed to a jog, catching his breath in preparation for greeting his jackass of a father-in-law—who absolutely hated Nash like rabies, no doubt about it—when the door opened and Aria’s hand appeared. A second later, she had pulled her father inside and shut the door.

  Huh. Weird.

  Nash’s jog became a walk. Why would Aria ask her father to come over at six fifteen in the morning? She must have asked him, or at least known he was coming; Bob hadn’t even had the chance to ring the doorbell.

  Better question, why hadn’t Aria told Nash that Bob was coming over?

  Unless…

  Nash would usually still be on his run right now, if he hadn’t left early.

  “No,” he said aloud, not wanting to start down that path. He trusted Aria. She’d done nothing to earn his suspicion.

  Until now.

  The voice in his head was one part cop instinct, one part leftover hurt from the way his relationship had ended with Rachael. The cop part smelled something fishy and wanted to investigate; the hurt part didn’t want to end up playing the fool again, this time with a woman he loved so much he wasn’t sure he’d survive a betrayal. The two parts together were too strong to resist.

  Instead of heading in through the front door, Nash circled around the garage into the backyard, thankful that he and Aria had decided to wait a few months before getting a dog for Felicity. He was glad not to have an animal barking, alerting people in the house to his presence.

  Alerting your wife to your presence. Your wife, who you’re spying on like she’s a criminal.

  This time it was the most decent part of his gut speaking up, and it was almost enough to make him turn around and head back to the front door. It would have been, he thought, if he hadn’t heard Aria’s voice through the open kitchen window a moment later.

  “You’re kidding, Daddy!” she squealed, then added more softly, making Nash think Felicity must still be asleep, “I totally take back what I said. You can call me at six o’clock in the morning anytime. I can’t believe this. It’s a miracle.”

  Hm. So Aria hadn’t known Bob was coming over until a few minutes ago.

  The realization made Nash feel better, but he was already committed to spying at this point, so he crept closer, squatting to stay below the windowsill and unseen until he was crouched directly beneath the window over the sink, the one Aria liked to leave cracked because she said the garbage disposal smelled funny.

  “It’s no miracle.” Bob March sounded very pleased with himself. “It’s karma. I told you rats leave trails, and old Liam’s didn’t prove very hard to find.”

  “So what’s next?” Aria asked, clearly still excited. “Do we send these over to him, or to his lawyer? Or what?”

  “We’ll take the folder to your lawyer as soon as her office opens, and have her send it over, so it’s official,” Bob said. “I wouldn’t be surprised if Liam drops his suit before the day’s over. After that, we’ll see about getting him to sign something giving you sole physical and legal custody of Felicity from here on out.”

  “Oh my god, that would be…” Aria’s breath rushed out. “That would be the best thing that’s ever happened to me. Thank you, Daddy. Thank you so much.”

  Bob’s voice was muffled for a moment, and Nash imagined Aria was probably hugging her father, but then Bob’s words became clear again. “You and Felicity free to come back home is all the thanks I need. Now you can be done with this joke of a marriage, and get on with your life.”

  Nash’s gut clenched, his teeth grinding together as he waited for Aria’s response. This was it, the moment that would prove if what he and Aria had was real, or if she’d been using him all along.

  “Daddy, I can’t,” Aria said, not sounding nearly as sure of that as Nash would have liked.

  “You can, and you will,” Bob said, a hard note coming into his voice. “Especially if you want me to keep your dirty secret from your mother. My man in Nashville said you and Liam were never even legally married, Aria Beth. There’s no record of that elopement you talked about ever taking place.”

  Nash’s eyebrows shot up. She and Liam hadn’t been married? Why hadn’t she told him? Nash actually liked the idea of being Aria’s first—and only—husband, but he didn’t like being lied to. It reminded him too much of Rachael.

  “Listen, Daddy,” Aria began, but Bob cut her off before she could say another word.

  “You lied to your mother and me about something as sacred as a marriage. Do you have any idea how that would tear your mother apart?”

  Aria sighed. “I felt like I had to, Daddy, I—”

  “You felt like you wanted to avoid having a strong discussion about your decision to have a child out of wedlock is what you felt like,” Bob said. “You were raised better, Aria, and when I think of all the times I—”

  “It wasn’t a decision, Dad,” Aria said, raising her volume to be heard over her father’s rant. “Liam didn’t want to get married. What was I supposed to do?”

  “So you thought you could trap him with a baby, is that it?”

  “Of course not. That’s terrible, Daddy, I would never do something like that,” Aria snapped, making Nash proud of her for standing up to the old wretch. “I wasn’t trying to trap, Liam. We didn’t even mean to get pregnant, it just…happened.”

  Bob’s grunt made it clear he wasn’t buying Aria’s excuses. “Which is exactly why we need to get you away from this Geary kid before it ‘just happens’ again and we’re blood-related to that pack of white trash breeders.”

  Nash almost lost it right then, almost stood up and shouted for Bob March to get his snobby, elitist ass out of his house, and never set foot on his property again, when Aria said—

  “You know what you sound like when you talk that way, Dad?” Her words vibrated with anger. “You sound like a nasty, narrow-minded, old bigot.”

  “Aria Beth, don’t you—”

  “And it breaks my heart,” she said, voice breaking, “because I know you’re better than that. I know you are a kind, loving man who was a wonderful father to me and a wonderful grandfather to my baby, but when you act like this… I don’t even know who you are. But I know I don’t like that person, and that I don’t want that person hanging around, looking down on the people I love.”

  Nash swallowed hard, feeling his own shame tightening around his neck like a rope at a hanging. He shouldn’t be spying on Aria. He should have trusted her without needing to sneak around and eavesdrop.

  “And that’s why I lied about being married to Liam, Daddy,” Aria continued with a sniff that made Nash guess she was either crying or trying hard not to. “I didn’t want you looking down on my baby just because I wasn’t married when she was born. There is nothing wrong with Felicity, and there is nothing wrong with
the Geary family, either.”

  “I know there’s nothing wrong with Felicity,” Bob said in a gruff voice. “Don’t cry, sweetheart, I didn’t mean to upset you.”

  “Well you did, Dad,” Aria said. “You more than upset me. You made me afraid of what’s going to happen to this family in the future.”

  “What do you mean?” Bob asked cautiously, starting to sound as if he realized what a pile he’d stepped in.

  “I’m not going to divorce Nash. He’s my husband and I love him,” Aria said, sending another pang of guilt worming through Nash’s heart. “He’s a good man and he’s done nothing to deserve the way you look down on him and his family.”

  “Nothing?” Bob practically shouted. “Taking advantage of a fifteen year old girl isn’t nothing, it’s—”

  “That was twelve years ago, Dad,” Aria shouted back. “It’s time to get the hell over it.”

  “I will not get the hell over it!” Bob snapped. “I’m your father. And if you had been able to see the way you looked standing next to that boy that night… You were still a baby, sugar. You looked like you were twelve years old, and he was a full-grown man.”

  “Dad, please. Nash and I are less than three full years apart!” Aria said, obviously close to losing her patience. “It doesn’t matter what—”

  “It goddamned well does matter!” Bob’s shout was so loud that Nash wasn’t surprised when, a moment later, Felicity began to cry out from her bedroom.

  “What the hell was he doing, wanting to sleep with someone who still looked like a little girl?” Bob raged on, ignoring Aria’s request that he lower his voice before he scared the baby. “He’s a child molester is the only thing I could think of then.”

  “Daddy!” Aria scolded, the shock and outrage mixing in her tone mirroring the revulsion rising in Nash’s chest.

  Nash stood, heading for the back door, no longer caring if Aria or Bob saw him coming.

  “And it’s the only thing I can think now,” Bob said, obviously on a roll and not intending to stop anytime soon. “And I don’t want my baby granddaughter growing up in a house with a man—”