Enough

by Pacheco, Briana

  “This house is massive.” Tiffany said.

  “It’s like any regular house.” I said, trying to get them off the fact that this house is considered a mansion to some.

  She walked up to my side and whispered, “I’m sorry about walking in. I thought since the door was open–”

  “Don’t worry about it. Where you guys lurking outside my house when you texted me?” I asked.

  “No.” She looked down at the stairs. “We were at Sophie’s waiting to go to your place.” I smiled. They were close by.

  “Why do you guys have duffel bags?” I asked.

  “Liam said Alex has a pool. We kind of hoped to stop by and swim. Now we can.” I looked behind me. Everyone was huddled into a group talking.

  Alex opened the front door and let everyone in. We walked into the living room and everyone took a seat on the couches. They all formed a circle facing one another. We came here for a reason. Not Jeremy. So let’s get to the point.

  “I wanted to talk about that night.” I said looking at all of them. Liam wasn’t there but he’s included in all my drama. His father’s on the case… My eyes landed on Bryan last. I just recently found out he’s my brother and he’s part of this disaster I call my life. Then I realized everyone was sitting in the same spots as they were when Giovanni held them hostage.

  “First, can everyone switch spots?” I asked. Zach and Alex looked around and saw what I was seeing. They got up and switched places with everyone. I can’t handle looking at them in that order and recalling what happened that night.

  “Much better.” I said.

  19. No Way

  I had a box of tissues next to me, ready for the unexpected. I know that talking about everything will choke me up. But I have to do it. I know I do. “I just have one question before we start.” I said. Everyone had their eyes fixated on me. I looked at Sophie and Zach. “When you found out what happened to me, why did you stick around? I would have figured you to say I deserved it because I was a slut.”

  “Emily, we were best friends. I know what we did was cruel but no one deservers what happened to you. I couldn’t just walk away from you like I did before.” Sophie said.

  Zach cleared his throat and looked at me.

  “I feel terrible about what happened when we…” His eyes dropped to the floor than met mine and slid to Alex’s. Shit. Only Bryan knows he hit me.

  “Zach, I know what happened last year was because of something but that’s in the past now. I think if I still had a problem being around you, you wouldn’t be here.” I said. I looked at everyone in the circle. “Does anyone have a problem having Zach around?” My eyes landed on Bryan.

  “I did but now he seems cool. I mean… I still don’t like the fact that he did what he did but if you can forgive him, I guess I can.” Bryan said.

  I looked at Alex. He’s wondering what happened. But he nodded.

  “I do drive him around so I guess we can squash everything that happened at the pizzeria.” Liam said. Tiffany nodded and Sophie smiled.

  “All right, then. I’m sorry about the nose.” I said.

  “Don’t be. You knocked some sense into me that day.” Zach said.

  Everyone laughed at the joke and I burst into tears. I know. I’m weird.

  Sophie stood up and hugged me. “I would have punched him to if he did that to me.” She said. So she knows about us.

  “It’s not that.” I said. “I was so helpless and after what Giovanni did to me…” I grabbed a tissue and wiped my eyes. I took a few deep breaths then said, “I thought about ending everything because my life was so fucked up. I really did. I just had so much anger bottled up. It had to come out.”

  Tiffany got off the couch and hugged me.

  “You have us now. We can talk about it, Em.” She said.

  I calmed myself down and nodded.

  I took those pills. I wanted to kill myself. I felt worthless.

  Used. Nothing.

  It’s hard going through something and not knowing what to do afterwards. You feel alone. You just give up.

  “The way I treated you when I found out you’re my sister was horrible.” Bryan said. “I’m so fucking sorry about that.”

  “You guys act like I’m going to kill myself any minute.” I said rolling my eyes. Everyone was back on the couch looking at me. Is that what they think? “I’m not.” I clarified. I wiped away the tears and looked at them. “I feel like the luckiest person in the world to have you guys. Why would I end that?” I asked. And it’s true. I’m in a good place right now. Almost…

  “Prom queen’s right.” Liam said. “She looks like she’s having the time of her life.” I laughed. He always has to put ‘prom queen’ in there.

  “Now that that’s out of the way, I want to talk about what happened that night.” I said. “At the house.” Everyone had weird emotions about what was said. We talked about how they got trapped in that house and got tied up. Alex was in his car and was caught off guard. Tiffany and Bryan were together with Giovanni and something seemed weird about no one being in the house. Bryan got hit in the head and Tiffany was gagged with chloroform.

  “He said he had something planned for you.” Zach said.

  “I thought we’d never leave.” Tiffany said.

  “Where was my shirt?” I blurted.

  I remember coming to and not having a shirt on.

  “Don’t know. He had you over his shoulder without it.” Sophie said. Ohmygod! Did he do something to me before bringing me down there?

  “I heard you come in. He brought you down a minute later.” Alex said. It’s like he read my mind. Unless Giovanni raped me quickly, I have nothing to worry about. I hope.

  “When he hit you and you smiled back at him, I knew you would find a way out.” Bryan said trying to hide a smile. “You just had that look.”

  “You smiled at him?” Liam asked with raised eyebrows.

  “Yeah, he hit her and she said, ‘you hit like a bitch.’” Tiffany said.

  “I was furious that he brought them into it. Like, you had a problem with my father yet you involve other people. What the fuck?” I said shaking my head. It was fucked up. He should have never gotten them involved.

  Then we talked about Mark and Christy…Liam can’t say anything. It’s a secret. Then we finished up the conversation with how everyone came back for me and saw what happened.

  “I still can’t believe you guys came back. What if he killed me and went back for you?” I asked.

  “Hey, we couldn’t leave a player behind.” Bryan said.

  “Still. You guys should have left.” I said right before I got a sharp cramp. Holy shit. I gripped my side and made a face.

  “You okay?” Alex asked.

  “Yeah, probably just a cramp.” I said squeezing my stomach.

  “How about that pool, huh?” Zach asked. I know guys don’t like talking about periods. He wants the topic over with.

  I’m not in the mood to swim, especially because of my cuts so I headed upstairs with Alex’s duffel bag. I just want to be alone while everyone swims. I’ll sit on the edge of the pool or something.

  I changed into a tank top and shorts to be comfortable.

  Bryan was waiting downstairs already in swimming trunks with a glass of water for me. He walked me through a room, which looks like a changing room. Hooks for clothes are on the walls with a few chairs and benches. This is weird. How has this room in their house? My boyfriend.

  We walked into the room and stopped at the sliding door leading to the pool. I’m going to have to have a tour of this house. Who knows what else I’ll find.

  Everyone in the pool was already wearing shorts and bikinis.

  Alex was leaning against the house when Bryan and I came out. “You’re not gonna swim?” He asked walking up to us.

  “I’m not in the swimming mood.” I said. Seeing Alex in swimming shorts made my mind come up with different things to do right now. “Maybe later.”

  “Emily.�
�� Sophie called from the side of the pool. “I forgot how fun it is to be around you.” She said smiling. We were always wild.

  I looked at Bryan and Alex. “What are you waiting for? Jump in.” I said. They cracked a smile and did just that. I took a seat on a chair and watched them. For a few minutes everyone laughed and threw a volleyball around. I have no idea where that came from.

  “You guys having–”

  My phone started ringing and I lost my train of thought. It wasn’t just anyone calling. I know because of the ringtone. Born to Die by Lana Del Ray played. Only one person has that ringtone. He’s out of rehab then. Everyone went quiet and waited for me to get it. I can’t. He hasn’t called me in four months.

  I keep trying to forget what happened during the summer…lies, sex…drugs. It was a rough time and Ty was there for it. We’ve been through a lot. If Ty was calling me then he wants something. Maybe it’s not what I’m thinking but he’s linked to my past. Linked to that.

  I slowly got up and placed a foot in front of the other. Maybe he doesn’t want those things…maybe he just wants to talk about something…maybe he has drugs… No, he was in rehab.

  My mind isn’t letting me focus. Just the thought of Ty calling me changed something. I have to see him…I want to see him. I need to go back to… He has the drugs… I want them.

  I was okay for four months. Now I can’t handle myself because of a stupid phone. I’m being pulled to him and I can’t stop.

  “Emily.” Tiffany called out my name but I didn’t stop walking. I walked over to the table where my phone was and stared at it. I should pick it up.

  When I reached for it, someone grabbed my hand and turned me away from the table. Tiffany. “Emily.” She said giving me a look.

  “What are you doing?” I asked pulling my hand out of hers.

  “Me? What are you doing?” She asked dripping water all around me. “You promised.” I did. Never to talk to him again…but maybe just a quick call won’t hurt. When the ringing stopped, there was a chime. I tried to get a look at the screen. I only saw, can I see you? The water lapping against the side of the pool was the only noise I heard.

  “Tiffany, let go of me.” I said.

  “No, I know if I do you’re going to do something stupid.” She said staring at me hard. “I’m trying to help you.” I just want to talk to him. Life back in the summer was easy. I didn’t have to do anything. I got to be free. Until something happened idiot! “I won’t let you do it again. The summer’s over. You moved past it.” No I didn’t. I didn’t. It still plays in my mind. All the time. “Do you want it to happen again?” She asked and that snapped me out of it.

  It almost happened but Mark came in and stopped it. He was pisssed at Ty for letting something like that happen but the fact that nothing happened, cooled him off. Ty doesn’t know anything about that. He wasn’t in the right state of mind.

  She just stared at me longer. “I just want to help you.” She said.

  I shook my head. “You can’t fix me. I’m beyond broken.” I said.

  My phone started ringing again. Ty. I reached for it but Tiffany pulled it out of my hands.

  “I’m doing this because I love you.” Then she shoved me hard into the pool. I let out a squeal as I fell into the cool water. I popped out and stared at her. “I’m sorry.” She said.

  I wiped my hair off my face and swam toward the edge of the pool.

  What was I thinking? I can’t talk to him. I thought I deleted his number…I would have done something I would have regretted. Alex is right here. I was going to forget that? Hurt him? What is wrong with me?

  When I reached the edge, I looked up at Tiffany and nodded. Silently saying thank you and everything’s fine. She did just stop me from leaving and going over there to do something stupid.

  “I have nothing else to wear.” I said trying to stop thinking about my phone. About Ty. I turned around and looked down at the ripples of water. I’m broken and I don’t think I can be fixed but I can at least try. “Since I’m in here, I guess I can have some fun.” I said. Tiffany put my phone back on the table and walked over. I grabbed her ankle and yanked her in. Payback.

  “That’s fair.” Tiffany said popping up. “If you’re up to it then we should jump in…like regular people.” She’s trying to change the subject for everyone’s sake. I nodded. “Sophie.” We got out the pool and stood by the edge. We always did this when we were younger. We walked back a few inches, ran, jumped, flipped and landed. Perfect all the time.

  “I thought you guys forgot about it.” Sophie said smiling.

  “How could we? Emily taught us that after that fashion show years ago.” Tiffany said beaming. I locked eyes on Alex. He winked.

  “Ohmygod. I remember that. You almost killed some poor kid. But we did look hot. The designer knew what she was doing.” Sophie said.

  “I have a feeling that kid is perfectly fine now.” I said. And he is…

  I can’t believe I was about to leave and do something bad…with my friends and Alex here… I’m an idiot.

  That one text changed me. I guess I’m not over it yet.

  We spent almost an hour more in the pool, swimming, doing tricks, talking and playing pool volleyball. We just had fun. All of us. Together.

  When I got out of the pool, I remembered I didn’t have anything else to wear for sleep. Everyone took turns showering and changing into their clothes and Alex handed me one of his t-shirts. The look in his eyes matched mine. This is going to be a good night.

  He put his duffel on his bed and I grabbed a clean bra and panties. I slipped on the t-shirt and inhaled. Yummy. I have major problems. I looked in the mirror and it covered me up. I combed my hair and went downstairs. Liam was walking into a room so I followed. I walked in the room and saw everyone wearing pajamas with food in the middle of the circle.

  “Someone looks sexy.” Tiffany and Sophie said whistling and wiggling their brows. They look plenty sexy too in short shorts.

  “I told you I had nothing else to wear.” I sat down next to Alex but the shirt kept rising up every time I pulled it down so I laid down on my stomach instead. My thigh didn’t hurt so I can suck it up.

  This room’s gigantic.

  The weird thing is the floor feels like a bed.

  There’s no furniture in here, the lighting is dim and a TV is attached to the wall. It’s like a living room mashed up with a bedroom without all the furniture.

  I got a closer look and saw snacks, soda and vodka in the middle of the circle of us. Looks like we’re going to pig out.

  I grabbed a pillow and rested on it to support my shoulder.

  “Oh, I forgot napkins.” Sophie said as she stood up.

  “There’s some in the back over there.” Alex said pointing to the back of the room. He was about to get up but Sophie beat him to it. I think she wants to investigate the house. She does have money after all. She might have things he has and wants to see who has more. Soph loves fashion and home décor.

  She walked over to the back and turned on a light.

  “Ohmygod!” She screamed.

  Tiffany and I jumped up and ran over to her.

  “What?” Tiffany asked.

  “What is it?” I asked when she wouldn’t answer us. She turned toward us and I saw she was holding what looked like a photo frame. She ran past us and stood in the middle of the circle.

  “How do you have a picture of Gwen Sawyer?” She asked Alex.

  Tiffany ran past me and grabbed the picture to look at it. Ohmygod. They’re glowing. They’re screaming and jumping up and down.

  “She’s my mom.” Alex said after a minute. They stopped jumping and looked at him. Everyone else had a weird look on their faces.

  “No way.” Sophie said. They looked up at me. I walked back to the group and took the picture frame from them. I looked down at Alex. This is not how I wanted them to find out.

  “Ohmygod! We went to one of her first fashion shows years ago.” Sophie said. Th
ey sat back down and included everyone in on the mystery.

  “That was my sister’s first show. She didn’t want to take all responsibility so my mom took over.” Alex said.

  “Wait. So your dad’s Damon Payne?” Tiffany asked.

  “Wait a sec. Emily, you knew he was Gwen’s son and you didn’t say anything?” Tiffany asked with hurt eyes. Or is it wonder?

  “What difference does it make? He’s still Alex.” I said.

  “Yeah but you have pictures to look at.” Sophie said. “You can stalk the web for hours on the Payne family and you won’t find pictures of any of them.” She glanced at Alex. “Why don’t you have pictures?”

  Alex blinked a few times while we stared at him. “I, uh…my lawyer had any taken down when my family past.” He said. “And my parents didn’t want us to be seen around the world when we were younger.”

  Oh…that makes sense.

  “Now all this makes sense. The house, your car, everything. Is your family staying because of him?” Tiffany asked me. This is why I didn’t want anyone to find out he’s rich. Everyone is going to think I’m with him because of it. I cleared my throat.

  “Are we going to drink that or not?” I pointed at the vodka. I sank back down in my spot and opened it. Watermelon flavor. Yes. I took a big gulp and handed it to anyone you would take it.

  “I’m not calling you a gold digger.” Tiffany said. “I’m just asking if the reason you didn’t move is because of your boyfriend over there.” She said pointing at Alex. “Thank you, you rich bastard. I don’t know what I would have done if Em moved.”

  Oh, god. She did not just say that.

  “Where are we going tomorrow?” Bryan asked laughing.

  “It’s a surprise.” Alex and I said at the same time. “But I promise it’ll be fun.” Alex finished.

  “Who’s car we taking?” Zach asked.

  I can’t believe I didn’t think about that. If we take mine and Bryan’s–

  “I got it covered.” Alex said. Sophie and Tiffany sat back down and stared at Alex with admiring eyes. I’m staring to get jealous. But I know they won’t do anything. Alex wouldn’t either.