All or Nothing (Black River Bend Book 1)

by Fel Fern

  If Preacher had his way, he would’ve taken Travis to his favorite roadhouse in Black River Bend. They’d have some locally-brewed beer and greasy cheeseburgers. He overhead one of the boxers in the gym mention the joint was still there. Maybe they could do that the next time. Preacher wanted to show Travis he wasn’t an asshole who was only interested in fucking him. Well, they’d get to that part sooner or later.

  “Thank you for bringing me here. I’ve always wanted to try Sebastian’s, but they’re always booked months ahead,” Travis said.

  “I got lucky the owner was a fan,” he admitted.

  “I’m glad he is. First, the flowers, then this. This is turning out to be a wonderful date, Preacher.”

  Seeing Travis enjoying his meal and wine, made him smile. This meal might cost him an arm and leg but it wasn’t like Preacher was broke. Since he didn’t have a permanent address and only spent his earnings on food and beer, he had a neat little nest egg in the bank.

  “Glad you feel that way.” Preacher took a sip of the white wine the server recommended. It tasted surprisingly alright but he was still a beer man.

  “Can I ask you a personal question?” Travis asked.

  “Sure.”

  “Why did you ask me out? You could ask any guy you want on a date but you picked me.”

  “I don’t want to date anyone else but you,” Preacher said, looking Travis in the eye. “I don’t normally do this. I only used to do hook-ups. My last relationship, if it could be called that, lasted a week.”

  “Then why—”

  “You’re different, Travis,” Preacher simply said. “The last time we’ve seen each other was ten long years ago and yet I’ve never forgotten the night you stole a kiss from me.”

  “Really?” Travis asked. “I was such a nerdy kid back then. I still am. I never hide my hobbies. I enjoy my games and anime. I still don’t get along with people. That’ll never change. I’m nothing like you or my brother. I’m a loser.”

  “You’re not a loser. Don’t ever call yourself that. Everyone enjoys different things. People are overrated,” Preacher said with a shrug. “Let me remind you that you’re one of the few success stories this stupid little town managed to produce. Travis, you graduated from MIT, got into a big game design company.”

  Travis toyed with the remaining asparagus on his plate.

  “You done selling yourself short?” Preacher asked him.

  “Stop making me sound so wonderful. I’m not. I’m flawed like everyone else.” Travis finished his glass of wine. Good thing they ordered a bottle. Preacher poured him another glass because Travis looked like he needed it. If Travis wanted to let some stuff off his chest, then Preacher would be a good listener.

  “You asked me yesterday why I quit.” Travis started.

  He nodded.

  “I dated my boss. It was against company rules but back then, I didn’t care. I mistook admiration for desire. I never wanted Miles that way but he kind of pressured me.”

  Preacher stilled. He figured it was something like that. Travis was a nice guy, the kind of man who’d help an elderly lady cross the road, who wouldn’t abandon a stray cat on the sidewalk. Kurt always worried someone would take advantage of Travis. Kurt called Travis a pushover but to Preacher, Travis was just good-natured. There ought to be more people like Travis in the world.

  Hell, Preacher had no business messing with an angel like Travis but it was too late to change his plans now. Travis had him hooked. Obsessed might be the better word.

  “Define pressured,” he said.

  Preacher cracked his knuckles, unable to help himself. Travis jumped at the sound.

  “As you said, I’m a grown man. I made a bad call. That was all. Miles couldn’t stand rejection. I used to love coming to the Gold Griffon Gaming offices every day but he made my life hell. I knew I couldn’t keep working there, so I quit,” Travis admitted.

  “That’s a pretty brave move,” he said with approval. “A wise one. No one should keep working for a shitty boss.”

  “Everyone at work called me crazy, told me I was wasting an opportunity of a lifetime. Any programmer would kill to work in Gold Griffon,” Travis said, sagging his shoulders.

  “There’ll be other opportunities. They probably regret letting you go. I won’t pretend I understand a single thing about coding, but Kurt tells me, you’re pretty good at what you do.”

  Travis scoffed. “Of course he’d say that. He’s my brother.”

  “You graduated top of your class.”

  “Yeah, well, I don’t know what I want to do anymore.”

  “There’s nothing wrong with taking a step back,” he said. “You’ll figure it out.”

  “What about you? You’re top of your game. Are you,” Travis paused. “Happy?”

  He laughed. “That’s not a word I’d use. Besides, I lose my matches half the time. I’m beginning to wonder if I don’t have what it takes anymore.”

  “Don’t say that. Kurt says you could easily win another championship if you worked hard.”

  “Hearing those words of encouragement from you is something. Makes my dick hard,” he said, flashing Travis his teeth. Travis coughed and drank more wine. “Jokes aside, my body’s no longer in top condition anymore.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I’ve had three broken ribs. Three concussions. The list goes on but I won’t bore you with the details.”

  “It’s tough being a fighter, isn’t it?” Travis said softly. “I always hated my dad for being one, then dragging Kurt and you into the ring.”

  “Is that why you didn’t want to date me? Because I’m a fighter?”

  “Partly,” Travis said. “I also know you’re trouble.”

  “Now we’re talking.” Preacher took that as a compliment.

  “Preacher, thank you for tonight, everything’s been so wonderful but it’ll never work between us.”

  Preacher took a deep breath. “You never let up, don’t you?”

  “We’re on different wavelengths. We want different things.”

  “A moment ago, you said you didn’t even know what’s the next step you’re going to take. What if being with me is the answer? There’s a reason you and I ended up back here, at the start.” Preacher let those words sink in for a couple of seconds. “What are you so scared of, Travis?”

  “That you’ll end up hurting me. You’ll leave my heart in tatters and I don’t think I’ll ever recover from that blow.”

  TRAVIS LOOKED AT PREACHER after saying his piece. God. He was being such an awful date and he knew it. Preacher pulled out all the stops on this one. Preacher even admitted eating at a fancy place like this wasn’t like him at all and yet Preacher made all this effort to show Travis he could be a gentleman.

  Preacher reached for his hand across the table. Preacher closed his fingers over Travis’ own. They felt big, callused, and warm. Under the soft glow of the restaurant’s lights, Preacher’s black ink looked more vivid than ever and he couldn’t help but notice how Preacher’s arm muscles bunched under his shirt. Preacher was all male, the very definition of a man. One touch and Preacher made his heart race.

  “I promise you that won’t ever happen,” Preacher said. “Travis, I’ve never been more serious in my entire life.”

  “Don’t joke around. It’s not funny,” he whispered.

  He should push Preacher’s hand away but he lacked the heart to do that. It felt like a very long time since someone took care of him, who went above and beyond for him. It was nice.

  “I’m not and I’ll prove it.” Preacher snuck a quick, fleeting kiss on his mouth then called for their bill.

  Dazed, he could only let Preacher pull him to his feet. They left the restaurant.

  “I’m full. Let’s take a walk around the block before I drive you back home,” Preacher said.

  He startled, a little surprised Preacher didn’t mention sex right away. Preacher took his hand and they started walking past the other restaurants
on the street. There were couples everywhere, all enjoying their Friday night. He used to imagine being one of them, with Preacher on his side.

  They generated a couple of whispers and giggles.

  He looked at Preacher. The other man seemed so confident. Preacher didn’t care what other people thought of them. Preacher even slid his arm over Travis’ shoulders and pulled him close. He smells so good, Travis thought.

  “You cold?” Preacher asked him.

  “Cold?” Travis repeated.

  He was touched when Preacher took off his jacket and placed it over his shoulders. They walked to the end of the block and started to turn back. Travis assumed they’d return to Preacher’s truck. He wanted to keep walking. Travis didn’t want this night to end. Some of the shops on this end of the street were closed. It was just the two of them walking on the sidewalk.

  “You’ve been really sweet this evening,” Travis remarked. Tonight had been nothing but magical. Travis never imagined Preacher would pull all the stops tonight. Preacher confessed he hadn’t done this before and yet on Travis’ scorecard, the date was a 10/10.

  Preacher stood in front of him and slid his hands down Travis’ shoulders, his sides, then, settled them on the curve of Travis’ ass. Preacher gave him a little push forward so their chests and groins bumped. He could feel Preacher’s erection rubbing against his jeans and his own thickening prick.

  “No one’s ever called me that,” Preacher said, intense gaze on him.

  His heart started a fast gallop. His breaths came short. Travis felt like he was running a fever. His entire body felt like a plucked bowstring. His muscles all tensed up.

  “What? Sweet?” He asked.

  Preacher rested his forehead over his. Their noses rubbed against each other. “Yeah. Playing at being a gentleman is harder than I thought.”

  “Then stop,” Travis whispered. “I know this isn’t you. I don’t expect you to change for me.”

  “I just wanted to see if I can stop being a bastard,” Preacher asked.

  Then Preacher leaned his mouth and kissed him again. Preacher started slow and tender, then it became rough and wet. Travis clutched at Preacher’s shoulders. When Preacher stuck his tongue down his throat, he sucked down hard on it. He shut his eyes.

  Travis felt like he was in heaven. It felt that good. Preacher slipped his big hands down his pants, past his underwear to touch his bare ass. Travis could picture Preacher taking off his pants and sheathing his big, thick dick inside Travis’ asshole. He groaned, rubbed his crotch against Preacher. Their damned clothes got in the way of their skin touching.

  Preacher pulled his mouth away, then rested his lips on the side of Travis’ neck. He groaned when he felt the slight bite of teeth. There was brief pain, then it was over. Travis wanted to look at himself in the mirror, the see the hickey Preacher left behind on his neck.

  “What do you say we take this further back at my motel room?” Preacher whispered in his ear.

  “Hell yes.”

  Preacher chuckled at his excited tone.

  He blushed. What else was there to say?

  Being with a man like Preacher was dangerous. Preacher might just end up breaking his heart, but he was past the caring stage. Nothing mattered except Preacher gazing up at him like he was the only man in the world who existed for him. Travis was willing to take that plunge. With Preacher, it was so easy to drown and Travis had no intentions of coming up for air any time soon.

  Chapter 4

  Preacher knew he should hit the brakes, turn his motorcycle around and return Travis to his apartment. He didn’t slow down one bit. Travis let out a whoop behind him and embraced him tighter. When he picked Travis up, Travis mentioned he’d never ridden a motorcycle before. Well, Travis seemed to be having a good time, and Preacher didn’t want to ruin it.

  He stopped the bike in front of the Lemon Seed motel. The place was located right on the outskirts of town. It wasn’t exactly a palace. Travis’ place was probably a lot cleaner but they might bump into Kurt. Preacher wasn’t in the mood to deal with his best friend right now.

  He waited for Travis to get off the bike before dismounting. Travis handed him back the spare helmet. He took off his helmet and tucked them in the compartment in the back of the motorcycle.

  “We’re really doing this?” Travis asked.

  Preacher stood in front of Travis and grasped his hands. They were cold. “If you changed your mind, tell me now. I’m not going to push you into doing something you’re not ready for,” he told Travis.

  “Are you having seconds thoughts?” Travis asked him.

  “No. I knew the moment I entered that office that your ass is mine,” Preacher said with a smirk. “Usually, I get what I want but for you, I’ll make an exception. I can wait until you’re ready.”

  “Kiss me again?”

  How could Preacher refuse him? Right at that moment, Travis looked so lost, so innocent and his for the taking. Preacher took one step forward. Cupping Travis’ cheek, he sealed Travis’ lips with a kiss. He sucked on Travis’ lower lip, ran his tongue over it. Preacher deepened the kiss and when he pulled away, Travis was panting and his pupils were dilated.

  Fuck, but Preacher’s dick felt like a steel pipe between his legs. If he had his way, he’d put Travis right on his hands and knees and take him like an uncontrolled savage. A beast. It didn’t matter they were in a dirty parking lot. His breathing turned hard. Preacher counted silently to ten in his head.

  “What are you so afraid of?” He had to ask.

  Silence. Preacher waited for Travis to gather his thoughts.

  “That after you have me, you’ll end up getting disappointed. Then you’ll leave once your fight with Reyes is over. I’m not someone who can easily recover from heartbreak.”

  “I’m not fooling around either,” Preacher said. “Travis, you were right to be defensive. Before you, I never had a real boyfriend. My last relationship lasted a week. I can’t even call it a relationship. We just used each other for sex. That’s all. That was the kind of man I used to be.”

  “No one can change within a day,” Travis whispered.

  “No,” Preacher agreed. “But I’m trying for you. Let me show you I can be the man you need.”

  “You’re a wanderer, a nomad. What if the road calls to you again even when things between us are going so good?”

  “So many ‘ifs’,” Preacher said with a scoff. “Why worry about tomorrow, when today is what matters?”

  “See? That’s the kind of thinking I don’t understand. I’m the exact opposite of you. I like my life structured, organized and—”

  Preacher shut him up with a kiss because at this rate they were getting nowhere. “I get it. I’ll take you back to your apartment.”

  “I want to see your room. Can I?”

  That question caught Preacher off guard.

  “Sure. Right, this way. It isn’t much.” No sex tonight. Preacher was fine with just hanging out with Travis if that was what he wanted. “We could watch a movie if there’s something good playing on TV.”

  He led Travis to his room, which was on the first floor. Preacher slot the key in and turned on the lights. The room looked no different from all the motels he crashed in—peeling wallpaper, saggy bed, scratched-up furniture, and it always smelled like mold.

  Travis looked around the space.

  “Is that all your luggage?” Travis nodded to his backpack on the floor.

  “Yup. I travel light,” he said.

  “Ten years ago, it was the same. You only had one bag with you when you crashed at our apartment,” Travis said. Travis sat on the edge of the bed, looking nervous.

  “Beer?” Preacher asked him. He had nothing else to offer.

  “Sure. Sounds great.”

  Preacher grabbed two cans from the mini-fridge and handed Travis one. He opened the cap, took a gulp and let out a sigh. Now, this was his familiar choice of beverage. Preacher joined Travis on the bed, sat close to him until
their shoulders brushed against each other. Preacher grabbed the remote and handed it to Travis. He watched Travis channel surf.

  “There’s nothing good on,” Travis said, turning off the TV.

  “You want another beer?” He asked.

  Preacher knew he should cut down his beer intake. He had a big fight in a few days. He should start eating clean from now on as well. Preacher should weed out any distraction as well, meaning he shouldn’t be screwing around with Travis but he wasn’t a saint.

  Travis shook his head. “Preacher, I don’t even know why I invited myself here. I guess I don’t want to go home yet. I mean, I know should leave you alone. You probably have to wake up early tomorrow and head to the gym.”

  “I don’t mind the extra company. Being on the road gets a little lonely,” he confessed.

  Preacher set his can on the nightstand and lay against the pillows. He kicked his shoes away and they landed on the floor. Travis surprised him again by crawling up further in bed. Travis lay next to him.

  “Do you think I can stay the night?” Travis asked him.

  “You prefer this room to your apartment?” He asked, amused.

  “You’re here,” Travis said as if that was the only thing that mattered.

  Preacher rolled on top of Travis and pinned his arms above his head. Travis didn’t push him away or tell him he needed space. That was encouraging. He gave Travis a long and deep kiss. Preacher released Travis’ wrists and peeled his shirt upwards. Travis took it off and tossed it to the floor, giving him complete access to Travis’ smooth and lean chest.

  “You’re in shape. You a runner?” Preacher asked. He nipped his way down Travis’ collarbones, his chest, his ribs. Reaching Travis’ crotch, he undid Travis’ pants and yanked them brutally down Travis’ ankles, along with his underwear.

  “I jog every morning,” Travis murmured. “W-what are you planning on doing?”

  “Relax. I’m not going to fuck your brains out tonight, I’m just going to blow you.”

  Preacher grinned. Travis looked taken aback, too stunned for words. He curled his fingers over Travis’ shaft, then blew at his cock. Travis shuddered above him. Preacher put his lips to Travis’ cock head. He stuck his tongue out and licked the pre-cum gathered there. Travis groaned above him.