by Sadie Jacks
Pushing myself up off the bed, I headed back for the door. Inhaled to see if his scent still permeated the air. This room smelled the least like him, which is why I’d chosen it. I didn’t need the temptation he presented shoved in my face any more than it already was.
When I felt the hallway was clear, I opened the door slightly. Double checked to see if he was…lingering. When I saw Koehn’s door was still closed, I threw my door open. Raced to the landing of the stairs. Jumped the railing.
Within moments, I landed on the first floor with a soft bend in the knees. I reached down, grabbed up my cloak and ruined leathers. Trying not to whimper at the destruction of my only belongings, I shoved the small bundle into the crook of my arm and ran back up the stairs at top speed.
Just as I was shutting my door, I heard Koehn’s open. “Vari?”
I said nothing as I backed away from the door, not taking my eyes off of it. Without looking, I delved my hands through the cloak, pulled out my favorite dagger. Once I wrapped my fingers around the familiar grip, I pulled it from its hiding place.
Koehn didn’t knock on the door and his scent didn’t thicken, so I figured I was in the clear. This time. Dropping my stuff on the floor once more, I spun in a tight circle. Looking for a safe place to do what needed to be done.
There. Across the room, through another door, was a room that reminded me of the kitchen. Striding to it quickly, I slapped the small switch on the wall and blinked against the blinding light that came from the over the sink. Over the bowl of the washing station, I blinked as I saw myself.
My golden brown eyes seemed sunken into my head, my lips too pink and rosy. The heavy fringe of lashes around my eyes made them seem bigger than they actually were. But it was the roses in my cheeks that caught my attention.
I shook my head. This wouldn’t do. Attraction was nothing but a distraction. And I needed to fulfill my promise to my brothers and sisters who were still trapped.
With cool tiles under my bare feet, I moved farther into the bathroom. Much nicer than the pit in the floor and the bowl of dirty water that we had in the catacombs, I was almost sorry to dirty this place. But I needed a behavioral adjustment. And this was the only way I knew how to achieve the results I required.
Taking off Koehn’s luxurious white shirt, I tossed it outside the room and then shut the door. Hunting around, I made sure I had some cloth before I got started. No reason for him to know what was going on in here.
I took a deep breath, looked at myself in the eyes. “He is not for you.” I raised my dagger, thrust it down so the razor-sharp blade pierced my thigh like a knife through fine silk. Fire and ice ripped through my body as I sucked in a breath so as not to scream.
I pulled the blade free. Blood splattered the room like drops of rain falling before the storm came through. I knew my body was stitching itself back together almost immediately. At least there wouldn’t be a huge pool of blood to clean up. Keeping my gaze on my face in the mirror, I said it again. “He is not for you.” I thrust the blade home. Tried to hit the same exact place.
My eyes stayed dry even as my throat tried to close. Again, I pulled my blade from my flesh. The nauseating tug of tissue on metal made my teeth ache. More blood droplets sprayed around the white room.
“He is not for you.” I glared at my reflection. I lifted my hand again. Putting all of my muscle into it, I jerked my hand down.
The door smashed open so fast it slammed against the wall, startling me. My aim was off. The blade slashed through the more sensitive inner edge of my thigh. I hissed out a breath.
“What the feck are you doing?” Koehn shouted as he caught my wrist. He yanked my hand back, the sickening slide of fire engulfing my leg. His fingers closed over mine, ripped the blade from my grip. He tossed it aside. The noisy clang of the alloy metal against the wall sounded like someone had dropped a bell down a long flight of stairs.
“Changing my behavior.” My voice was a hard rasp.
“What behavior is so awful that you need to stab yourself?” He reached behind him, pulled open a drawer without looking. In moments, he had a length of cloth wrapped around my thigh.
I smiled down at him, his dark head bent. I would be healed before he had time to really do anything to help me. “You don’t need that.”
He looked up at me. His eyes had bled to black, his fangs descended. Everything about him spoke of a predator. And it called to me.
“For the love of all things holy, don’t do that again.” His brow furrowed as he glared up at me.
I shook my head, not promising anything. I had to do it. It was the only way. Love and tender caring didn’t change behaviors.
“I’ll make sure to clean up the room. I’d hoped to not get it too…dirty.” I looked around the room. Luckily, the blood hadn’t gotten all over everything.
He snarled low in his throat, pulling my attention back to him. He shook his head, his hands still around the cloth on my thigh. His hands were so big, there was only a small section of my leg that his fingers couldn’t span. “Dirty? You were worried about dirty?”
I shrugged. Well, bloody. He was a vampire, after all. No need to make him suffer through my own punishment.
I gritted my teeth against the feel of my muscles and tissues knitting together. I should be used to it by now, but it was something that always tugged on me wrong. As if I knew it shouldn’t happen or work that way. The foreignness of the sensation never became familiar.
“Vari?”
I shook myself. Looked down at Kohen. “Hmm?”
His nose wrinkled. “What behavior are you trying to change?”
His face was worried, the black receding from his eyes. “Are you okay?”
Blowing out a breath, he nodded. “I’m fine. Are you?”
I smiled, nodded. “Yes.” Now I’d just have to do this whole thing later. But I’d do it somewhere else. I needed to find a spot where he wouldn’t be troubled by my methods. I had no idea how old he was, but the worry couldn’t be good for his heart.
“I heard that. And you will not be doing this to yourself ever again. Not if I have anything to say about it.” He glared up at me. His dark blue eyes glittering under the bright lights.
Shite. I needed to fix that telepathy path. Searching through my brain, I found the connection that hooked us together. When I couldn’t bring myself to sever it, I just lit it on proverbial fire and let it melt.
Can you hear me now? I asked.
His expression didn’t change. Didn’t alter by a single twitch.
I know I shouldn’t, but I really want to suck your cock. And not because I needed to kill him or get information from him.
Nothing. Not even an eyelash quivered.
I smiled. “Well, at least we got that solved.” I backed up. The warmth of his hands on my bare leg turning into a different kind of heat in other places in my body. “And stop touching me.”
Reaching down, I pulled the cloth off my leg. Let it fall to the ground. Whatever the material was, it wasn’t as smooth and silky as my leather.
His eyes widened as he stared at my leg for a moment. He pushed to his feet in front of me. “You’re not injured.”
Well, that was relative, but I wasn’t bleeding. I shook my head. “No. I told you, you didn’t need that.” I sighed as I turned. Saw the specks of blood dotting the walls and floor. “I need to clean up in here.”
I walked through the door. Bent over to pick up the shirt I’d removed.
His sharp inhale turned into a choking cough.
I slid the shirt on, hooked a couple of the buttons in the middle together. Turning back to him, I saw his face was red, and he looked like he wasn’t getting any oxygen. “Koehn?”
His gaze jerked up to mine.
“Breathe.” I inhaled deeply. Urged him to join me.
He sucked in a breath. Blew it out through his nose. “Come with me. We need to order you some clothes.” He stomped out of the room and practically raced through the bedroom
. The door still standing open, he rushed through.
“Vari!” he yelled after me.
I rolled my eyes and sighed. Like I said: high maintenance. It would be nice to get some clothes, though. I trailed after him, knowing I couldn’t take too long. I needed to get the blood wiped up in the white room. The room was too pretty to have it stained red.
Following the heated scent of him, I found him in the room directly across the hall from his bedroom. I wasn’t really surprised he wasn’t using the room at the end of the hall because his scent was old and practically faded from the entrance. But I also wouldn’t have expected him to use the room he was in right now, either.
Especially when I walked in and saw all of the horrors of the catacombs brought to vibrant life.
I almost tripped as I saw the computers and screens. They covered almost every available surface. The only things missing were the robotic cutter and the scientific inquiry equipment.
Chills broke out over my flesh as I saw his hands flying over the flat boards on the desk. For a moment, I was back in those catacombs. Watching the blank faces of the enthralled human scientists as they ran and analyzed data they ripped and pulled from our broken bodies.
They were the true monsters. Puppets, in their own way, but monsters nonetheless.
I blinked rapidly, tried to clear the nightmares from my mind. Soon, I saw Koehn once more. Pictures scrolled by on the screens. Clothes. So many clothes.
I shook my head, aware he wasn’t looking at me at all. “Just order whatever. I’ll wear what you get me. Just save me the coin amounts. I’ll find some way to pay you back.” I started backpedaling. Needing out of that room. Away from the horrors that battered at the edges of my mind.
And how would the computer get the clothes to me anyhow? Did he have a maker in here somewhere, just waiting for his orders? It didn’t matter. Not really. Unless he had some poor soul held hostage to his ordering whims, he could do whatever he wanted. But I wouldn’t ever step foot back into this room.
“What size are you?” he asked without turning around.
“This size.” I held my hands out. I was almost to the doors. Almost away from the horrors and the nightmares that pressed against my mind. I was almost free.
Settle, V. He’s trying to help you, Beastie said in my mind.
I shook my head. Not with that stuff, he’s not. He could hurt me. Cut me open, splay me wide. He could hurt you. I shook my head again. Never again. Not ever. I’d take my own life before anyone else experimented on me or Beastie.
With one more step, I was back in the hallway. I sucked in a deep breath, shoved at the fuzzy vision. I wouldn’t give in. Wouldn’t be weak. Not this time. Reaching back into the computer room, I pulled the door shut. Then ran back to the room I’d chosen for myself, back to safety.
I shut the door with a silent sigh and went back to the white room. Picking up the cloth he’d used on my thigh, I turned on the water above the sink. It took me a second to get it running, but once I did, I moved the lever up to make the water run as fast and as hot as possible.
Soaking the cloth, I wrung it out and started wiping up the droplets of blood. It came off almost too easily from the walls and the floors. Done in long white rectangles, I made a mental note to ask Koehn what material this was that cleanup was so effortless. I was done in barely any time at all. I’d hoped the cleaning would clear my mind, but it was done too quickly.
Across the big white room, I picked up my dagger. Wiped the blade clean. Once it sparkled under the bright lights again, I carried it out to the bigger room. Laid it on top of my cloak with my other weapons. Soon, I would need to do an inventory so I would know exactly what I had. Rushing around in my escape hadn’t left a lot of time for careful packing.
A knock sounded on the door as I was shutting the water off. “Vari?”
I ducked back out into the main room. “Yes?”
The door swung open. “What are you doing? I told you we needed to order clothes for you.” Koehn stood there, arms crossed over his chest. One dark brow raised high.
I shook my head. “Who are you ordering to make me clothes?”
His brow furrowed and his face pinched for a second. Then it smoothed out, and a lopsided smile pulled at his sexy mouth. “Do you know what the internet is?”
I shook my head. “Should I?”
He shrugged. “It’s one of the best things since sliced bread. Literally. Anyways, I can go shopping without leaving my house. By ordering things, I tell a company what I want, they pick it out, and then send it to me.”
My mouth dropped open. “You get someone else’s indentured to make you things?” The nerve of this man. He must think he’s a god or something to be so presumptuous.
He shook his head. “No. Commerce. Economy. People make things as their job. I give them money. They send me things. I’m not forcing someone to do anything.”
My cheeks heated. Right. Normal societal things. I nodded. “Right.”
“If you’re the daughter of the king, surely you’ve had servants and staff. Did they not teach you how things worked outside of Old Faery?”
Servants and staff? Oh, this man was very deluded. I shook my head. “No. That never came up.”
He nodded. “Well, on Earth, a lot of things are done over the internet.” He waved me towards him. “I need your measurements and for you to pick some stuff out.”
I shook my head. “Honestly, whatever you pick will be just fine.” The measurement thing though. I didn’t know what I measured. I gritted my teeth. “Come here, please.” I didn’t want to do this, but it needed to be done. I didn’t know what else to do.
He walked over, a question sitting in his midnight blue eyes.
“Give me your hands.” I put mine out, palms up.
He laid his in mine.
Taking a deep breath, I shifted until I put his hands around my waist. Telling myself my heart wasn’t racing, I said, “I’m this big on my hips.” His fingers flexed into my flesh. He’s getting my measurements. He’s getting my measurements.
Shifting my hold, I slid his hands up my torso. Like lines of fire against my skin, I absorbed his heat. Fought to smooth out my breathing as it tried to back up in my throat. With a grimace, I moved so he could feel how big my breasts were. “And this big here.”
From this close, I could see that his pupils had grown huge. The midnight blue was nothing but a thin line of color. He nodded, swallowed hard. “And your legs?”
I sighed, nodded. Shifting one last time, I moved our hands back down my body. Pulled them behind me. “My butt is kinda big.”
He made a guttural noise in his throat as it felt like his fingers pressed into my flesh, squeezed the tissue. He shook his head.
With our hands locked together, I slowly edged them down the outsides of my legs. Prayed he was counting well. I was busy counting the thuds of my pulse in my ears and focused on the heat of his hands on my body. The ache in my core. Luckily, he didn’t need any measurements for that.
“And my legs are this long.” My voice was barely a whisper against his ear, the soft silk of his hair tickling my cheek as we crouched together, our hands on my ankles.
His exhale was a humid breath on the opposite side of my neck. The scruff of his beard rasped delicately on the curve of my shoulder. A low moan tickled the fine hairs at my hairline.
I nodded. Pushed him back. “There. Now you know what size to get me.” I backed up until I bumped into the bed. Caught myself before I fell over onto it. Or crumpled to the floor like an idiot.
He nodded and stared at me. Licked his lips. “Colors?” His voice was more of a groan.
“Black.” I put my hands behind my back, wrapped them in the fabric of my borrowed shirt. Breathe, V. Breathe. I sucked in a breath I hoped was silent.
He nodded again. “Good choice.” Ran his dark blue gaze over the length of my body again. His mouth moved slightly.
I exhaled. Good. He was counting again. That was good.
I shouldn’t have been worried. He was just trying to help me out.
My body didn’t agree, but my body was stupid most of the time. And right now, she could just stop whining like a pitiful kitten who just wanted to be petted. Even if I could still feel his hands on my body. The hands that had engulfed my own. If his hands were that big, was the rest of him as well endowed?
“Tight or loose?” he asked.
Huh? My brows furrowed as my gaze dropped to his crotch. I hadn’t seen him naked yet. How was I supposed to know how he was going to fill me? And was he really asking if he would be a tigh—
“Clothes. Tight fit or room to move?” Smoke layered his voice.
Oh, sweet stars. Heat rushed my cheeks. Get your head screwed on right, woman. “Tight.” Extra material could hamper good movement. Speaking of which, I needed to see if I could patch my cloak. Even if I had to scavenge from my leathers, I would do what I could to make it serviceable. “Leather.”
He swallowed. “Excuse me?”
“Leather. Do they make clothes out of leather anymore?”
He nodded. “They make clothes out of just about anything these days. You want leather clothes?”
I nodded. “Unless there is a better alternative that is breathable, supple, and can shed water quickly.”
He squeezed his eyes shut tight. Nodded. “I’ll see what I can find.” With that, he spun on his heel and practically ran from the room.
The door slammed behind him. I blew out a breath, felt the air in the room finally cool down. Whew. Who knew getting clothes was so involved these days?
Walking forward, I bent down and retrieved my ruined leathers and cloak. I needed to see what I could salvage. Putting it all back on the bed, I jumped up and got to the business of combat wear.
Chapter 18 – Koehn
Fecking saints. I blew out a breath as the stranglehold I had on my vascular system loosened. One of the benefits of vampirism—getting to decide where blood was directed in my body at any given time.
A wave of shudders washed over me as my dick grew to rival steel in the space of a couple beats of my heart. My fingers tingled as the feel of her exploded over my mind again. She was silk and satin. Everywhere. And the heat she pumped off?
