Take (Need #2)

by K. I. Lynn

  “You keep forgetting I already do.” I promised Dana and myself that I’d back off. Take it easy, not push too hard, and what I said is just that: me verbally pushing too hard.

  But it’s the truth. The hardcore, brutal truth my soul keeps screaming out, and one I know Kira feels deep down.

  She runs up to us, trying to push us away from each other, to work her way between us. She can’t. We’re too big for her to move, and we’re too busy wanting to kill each other for her to make us want to.

  “Both of you! Stop!” Kira cries out.

  “Just walk away already,” I warn him, for her sake more than anything.

  “I’m never going to walk away from Kira unless she makes me.”

  My vision turns bright red.

  “If you guys fight, I will never forgive either of you. I mean it!”

  At her words, Austin and I instantly take a step back away from each other.

  I want to kill him for it.

  I can see in his eyes that he wants to kill me, too.

  His eyes flicker toward Kira, and he runs his hand through his hair before heading to the entrance of the living room. There, he stops, turning his head to glare at me over his shoulder. “Don’t forget you’re her stepbrother. You can never give her what she deserves.”

  It’s a perfectly aimed blow.

  I want to see him fucking bleed at my feet. “You ever ask her to be your girlfriend again, and I will kill you.”

  “Brayden!” Kira slaps me in the chest.

  I don’t turn away from Austin’s stare. I’m dead serious, and I hope he sees that.

  He laughs, a bitter, mirthless sound. “I’d like to see you try. After all, you’re not the only man willing to kill for her.” Before I can say anything, he walks away, and I hear the front door slam shut shortly after.

  Kira hits me again, harder this time. “You’re such a fucking asshole!”

  “Why? Because I told him the truth?”

  “It wasn’t the truth!” She storms away from me.

  I follow her. “Kira, wait.”

  “Just leave me alone.”

  We end up on the second floor, outside the door to her room. I catch up with her and grab her arm.

  “What?”

  “Look at me.” I don’t drop her arm until shes does, that seemingly permanent anger in her gaze. “Did you really agree to think about being his girl?”

  Silence.

  The same silence she gave Austin when he asked her if she was thinking about me the night they slept together.

  “Kira.” I can’t hide the slightly broken tone of my voice. Shit, it’s nothing compared to how I feel about this shit situation.

  “Don’t look at me like that,” she says.

  “Like what?”

  Her little jaw twitches. “Like I’m tearing you apart.”

  “You are.” My voice drops so low I wonder if she even heard me.

  The shocked expression on her face tells me that she did. Her nostrils flare slightly and her disbelief becomes rage. “You fucking asshole.” She points at my room. “You stood in there, packing your bags to go to your girl.”

  I flinch. Knew this was coming.

  She’s not done. “You stood there, looked me in the eye, and you took that fucking call.”

  I remember. God help me, I do.

  “You told her, while staring at me, how much you missed her—”

  “I lied,” I mumble.

  “Did you?” She jams her finger into my chest. “Did you?”

  “Yes!” All I want is to hug her right now. Hug her tight. Somehow erase all the bullshit so I can get my sweet Kitty back.

  Fucking shit, it’s like I barely see her smile nowadays.

  “And when you went to her? How many times did you fuck her? How many times were you with her after that?”

  Too fucking many. “I had to think of you. Every damn time, I had to close my eyes and imagine it was you just to get through it.”

  She slaps me. “Fuck you, Brayden.”

  I grab her before she can storm into her room. “Hate me for it, but I loved you. Every minute that I was with her, every minute that I wasn’t, I still loved you.”

  “You don’t know how to love, then.”

  “You’re right. You’re so fucking right, baby.” I want to run my fingers over her skin, comfort her, but all I can do is offer her the truth. “I had no idea how to love you. I know that.”

  She’s silent as she contemplates what I’ve just told her. What seems like sympathy flashes in her eyes. “Your parents fucked with your head growing up, I get that. But you had no right to fuck with me.”

  “You’re right.”

  “I fucking cared about you so much. Forget what I felt for you as a girl, I was your friend, you asshole.”

  I would love to fall to my knees and beg her forgiveness. Would, too, if I thought it would help in the slightest. “I know. I know. That’s why, no matter how much you feel you need to hurt me, I’ll still be here. I’m not going anywhere.”

  She murmurs my name sadly, eyes glittering with unshed tears.

  Needing something—anything—I reach for her and pull her into my arms.

  She lets me, but she doesn’t hug me back.

  “I mean it. Do everything you want to me, hurt me any way you want. Hell, I want you to. Maybe then it’ll make the guilt a little easier for me.”

  “You’re a masochist,” she mumbles into my chest.

  I smile and kiss the top of her head. “Yeah. Especially when it comes to you.” No response. Sighing, I hug her tighter. “You can do whatever you want to me, and I’d still forgive you.”

  “Because you hurt me.”

  “And because I adore you.” In my mind, she’s my girl, no matter what happens. I can’t undo the thought, was never able to. And in my mind, she’s still my best friend, even if I’m no longer considered hers.

  “You’d forgive me anything? What if I decide I want to be with Austin?”

  “You’re so good at hurting me with that.” She tenses. “He was once my friend, Kira.”

  A fact she was very aware of when she decided to give herself to him. The one boundary I never crossed. The one boundary I’m damn sure I never would have. I would have never gone after any of her friends.

  Kira pushes at my chest.

  I move back slowly. “It’s okay if you chose him that one time. I get it. I forgave you for it the moment I found out.” Her, yes. Him? Never. I can’t.

  Her beautiful, sad eyes stare up into mine. “And if I decide to give him a chance?”

  “I’ll forgive you for that, too.” No clue how I’ll stop myself from trying to kill him, though. “I’ll wait for you. I just . . .”

  “You just what?”

  Fuck. Does she understand how hard this is for me right now? “I need to know I’ll have you someday.” My brain can’t even begin to imagine an entire life without her. Never could. I just fooled myself into thinking it was possible once.

  I watch her, trying to read what’s going through her mind.

  And I get nothing but her pain.

  Kira starts heading into her room. Against my will, I make no move to reach out for her.

  At her door, she stops. “Let me know if you need help unloading your car.” She walks into her room and closes the door.

  May 25th, 2015

  The bell rings, signaling the great escape. The stampede funneling through the classroom door is greater than usual. Then again, only nine school days remain, and an hour and a half of world history review has everyone crawling the walls.

  “Boo!” Ashley pops up behind me as I pull my phone from my back pocket.

  “Hey! How was Spanish?”

  “Muy boring,” she says with a sigh, then turns to me, her blue eyes sparkling with mischief. “Did Lyn tell you what she’s doing?”

  I shake my head. “No, she wasn’t in class.”

  Her eyebrows shoot up. “Really? Where, oh where, is my little
sister? And whose face is she sucking?” She pulls out her phone, typing away.

  I wake my own up, turning the screen on and seeing why my ass was vibrating all morning long.

  Six text messages.

  Over the last few months I got used to tons of messages per day, and today was no different. My daily dose of annoyance from Brayden.

  Though he isn’t the only sender, and I check out Jenna’s first.

  Sam is sooooo hot. I would seriously jump him.

  Followed by,

  What party are we going to this weekend? Maybe he’ll go.

  And then . . .

  What are you doing? Answer me!

  I shake my head. Study hall must have been extremely boring.

  The next is from Austin, and I find myself hesitating to open it. I haven’t forgiven him, and the whole explosion the day Brayden moved home still makes me sick.

  Hi. How’s your day? Did you hear about AJ Henricks party next month? It’s costume. I want to take you. Let me know.

  I sigh and back out of the message, deciding to worry about it later, because there are two more messages waiting for me and they might make me go crazy and tell Austin yes.

  Hey, baby. Did a little manscaping today. What do you think?

  I stop walking, stop breathing, even stop thinking. My jaw is slack, and I could be drooling. Because attached to Brayden’s message is a picture that has my blood pumping, thighs clenching, and clit twitching.

  I’m a pile of goo in the middle of the hallway, forced to lean on the bay of lockers next to me for support.

  It starts with his sexy smirk that drives me crazy, even though I don’t want it to, and is nothing but hard, smooth, taut chest and abs. He’s wearing a red hoodie. It’s covering up one of his huge pecs, but that doesn’t matter, it’s a tease, making me want to see it all. What’s showing trails all the way to the bottom of his abs, down to his very low-slung grey sweatpants. So low, the base of his dick is almost showing. The hoodie is open at the bottom, highlighting his V.

  The V!

  A sound I can’t identify leaves me at the sight of a highlight and definite shadow in his sweatpants.

  His cock.

  Oh, holy fuck, his cock.

  Missing you, if you couldn’t tell. ;)

  The head is hanging low and long, perfectly outlined.

  He’s hard. For me.

  My mouth is dry, hands shaking, pussy pulsing. I’m a fucking mess.

  “Yo, Kira, are you okay?” Ashley’s hand waves in front of my face, and I blink at her. “Girl, what is it?”

  She moves to look at my phone and I snap it close to my chest, making her eyes pop open in surprise.

  “Kira, show me.”

  “No.”

  Her gaze narrows, then she leans forward and snatches the phone from my hand, turning away before I can grab it back.

  “Ashley!” I reach for it, but it’s too late.

  Her eyes are glued to the screen, just as I’m sure mine were.

  “Oh, my God.” She glances up at me, then back down at the screen. “I think I just came.”

  My body goes rigid, and I grab the phone back as an unwanted rage boils in me.

  Ashley’s whole face is in shock. “I think I may have to switch to team Brayden.”

  “Shhh!” I hush her, grabbing her arm as I drag her into the bathroom.

  I need a minute to calm down, to collect myself. The bell goes off, and I don’t care that I’m late to calculus.

  I had to tell my girls some of what was going on after what happened over my birthday, but I didn’t tell them everything, all the crap that’s gone on over the years, so I told them he asked me out. That alone caused them to form sides. Jenna and Marilyn are team Brayden, while Ashley makes up team Austin.

  “Seriously, girl, you need to have that hot-as-fuck male specimen, if just for scientific research.”

  “Research?”

  “Yeah. See how many times that beast can make you come, and report to us so we can live vicariously in your bliss.”

  Fuck. Bliss.

  I hate to admit that she’s probably right. It’s bad enough my body betrays me every time I’m near him, even just hearing his voice.

  I don’t want him . . . but I do. Scratch this itch that takes over and forget who I am, forget about the world.

  Fuck him out of my system and be done with him.

  “That would be bad.”

  “No, it would be good. Very good.” Her eyes soften and she takes my hand. “Look, I know there’s a lot of baggage between you two, even without you saying it. It’s obvious. And while I’m still totally team Austin, what’s wrong with a hate fuck with Brayden?”

  I shake my head. “You’re terrible.”

  “No, I’m right.” She steps back toward the door. “Come on, let’s get to class. We can talk about it later. I’m sure Marilyn and Jenna want to weigh in.”

  I let out a groan and step forward. The last thing I want is all of their opinions, let alone allowing them all to view the picture. I’ll never get my phone back, and I also don’t want anyone else seeing something that was for me alone.

  “Wait.” I hold my phone up high, hitting the camera function and selfie my response with a middle finger just for him. It’s sitting in my cleavage, thanks to the angle. Oh, well.

  With my response out, we head to class. It’s only five minutes in when I slip into my seat and lean over to my neighbor, Thomas. “What did I miss?”

  He smiles and hands me a stapled stack of papers. “Review. I grabbed you a copy.”

  “Thank you!”

  As I turn back, my phone buzzes and a message pops up on the screen.

  I’m more than happy to fuck those tits, baby.

  I sigh and change my phone over to silent before slipping it back in my pocket. Brayden being home is not a good thing. Three hundred miles away was bad enough, but now? My skin itches, my heart races, and the attraction is overpowering.

  When I get home he’ll be across the hall, a few feet from me, and no Ryan to shield me because my rat of a brother abandoned me for a girl.

  Not that I fault Ryan for it, but I do like to tease him about it. Years of back and forth with Dana and they’re finally together. I know him, and that despite what he’s put off, he loves her.

  I stare down at the Calculus review. Only a few more days and school’s out, and I can’t wait to be done. Then again, that leaves me home alone with Brayden.

  Lord, give me strength to stave off this lust.

  May 27th, 2015

  The words in front of me blur. Not because I’m tired, but because my attention once again wanders.

  I shake my head, trying to refocus. It’s exhausting to fight this raging curiosity badgering my mind.

  Is he partying right now?

  Come on—of course he is. It’s his twenty-first birthday. Ryan and Dana invited me to go with them. I declined, of course.

  They said they were taking him out for dinner and then drinks.

  As per Ryan and Brayden’s usual status in quo, I’m assuming that drinks is code for “partying their asses off.”

  Whatever. I’m used to it. It’s not like I was tempted to go or anything.

  I uncap my highlighter and set back into it.

  Blurs. Nonsense. Some more blurs.

  I’m not getting shit done.

  Aggravated, I drop the highlighter onto my French workbook. My final is on Friday. I started out French late, but my plan is to continue in college and be fluent in two years tops.

  Jenna and the twins are also studying their asses off, but none of them are in French, so they aren’t available to offer me any kind of distraction.

  Not that studying a foreign language is actually doing anything. I thought it’d be enough to help me forget. Clearly, I was wrong.

  I chew on my thumbnail and stare at my dark computer screen.

  Just one look. A single peek and my curiosity will go away, right?

  I drag m
y laptop closer and turn it on. Approximately thirty seconds later, I find myself on Facebook, pulling up a profile I haven’t checked in forever.

  Brayden Hunt.

  Amid what has to be close to a thousand birthday posts, I see a picture that Ryan posted and tagged. It’s just him, Dana, and Brayden in the picture. They seem to be at some bar.

  The picture is totally different from what I expected to see. They seem to just be chilling instead of hardcore partying. The caption reads: “Had a blast with my boy on his twenty-first.”

  Had?

  The picture was posted almost two hours ago.

  So, the party is over? Ryan and Dana probably went off to do their own thing then.

  Brayden . . . I refuse to think about it. In the back of my head, I know what he’s most likely doing right now.

  It hurts to think that.

  Fuck! It actually still hurts.

  Footsteps sound out, coming up the stairs.

  Wait. Mom and Steve are supposed to be gone until tomorrow. They’ve been going out on more getaways lately. A desperate attempt to save their failing marriage.

  Curious, I get up and open the door to my room.

  Brayden stops just outside his bedroom door, fingers on the buttons of his black dress shirt.

  He’d been midway through unbuttoning it.

  My eyes slide down the length of him, pausing on the bared skin of his chest. I should look away. At the very least, be more discreet.

  I can’t. His smooth skin calls to me. If it was up to me, I’d lick every part of his chest, then move lower.

  “Kira.” His voice is strained. Probably because I’m eye-fucking him shamelessly.

  I swallow and look up into his eyes. “What are you doing home?”

  A smirk tugs at the corner of his mouth. “What? I can’t come home early on my birthday?”

  That smirk of his is too fucking sexy. Paired with that black, half-buttoned shirt and those black dress pants, he’s one fine looking man.

  Holy shit. It’s official—the little boy I met so many years ago is now legally a man.

  I look away, throat tight, and jerk my shoulder in a shrug. “I figured you’d want to party all night since it’s your twenty-first.”